


Ouroboros

by harrypanther



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternative ending to TROS, Angst and Tragedy, Any errors from canon are my own, Bendemption, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Romance, Everyone has difficult choices to make, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Dyad (Star Wars), Force Ghosts, I know it sounds confused but it will all become clear eventually, Implied/Referenced Torture, Is death permanent or will she return, Kylo Ren Redemption, Kylo is the Galaxy's most wanted man, Poe isn't completely convinced, Resurrection, Rey dies!, Sad with a Happy Ending, references to slavery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:21:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 29
Words: 90,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21920860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harrypanther/pseuds/harrypanther
Summary: It hadn’t worked. Rey remained dead, Ben is prisoner of the Resistance, awaiting trial for his crimes and the war is finally over. But the Force demands balance and not even death can sunder so unique a bond…
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 75
Kudos: 309





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is my first foray into SW fanfiction. But this struck me at the end of TROS. Rights remain with original creators.
> 
> Thanks to Vala411 for ideas, plot suggestions, Star Wars fact-checking and being an unofficial Beta

**ONE:**

It hadn't worked.

_It hadn't worked._

He had done everything that she had, had poured his soul and life force and-and everything into her…but she lay limp and lifeless in his arms, her staring eyes and peaceful expression mocking his own despair. He tried again and again, his efforts stuttering and fading with his strength but there was nothing: no motion, no warmth, nothing but an empty void where her light should be. The Bond was silent.

Rey was dead.

His vision blurred though her image remained burnt into his consciousness and he clutched her to his chest. She was almost weightless, her head limply resting against his body and he leaned forward, choked sobs shuddering through him. She was cold as well, no echo of her light or warmth or unique heart left.

It had all been for nothing.

As he thought the words, the familiar black smog of anger began to rise again. His old friend, a cloak he had worn for so many years to hide his pain at his rejection, his loneliness, his sense of inadequacy that Snoke had carefully fostered. All those months and years of suffering to urge him into the weapon they had made him…and then he had been unmade by the action that should have completed him.

His father's murder.

The internal conflict stemming from that one heinous action had unbalanced his convictions, making him vulnerable. He had fought hard to quash the uncertainty, meditating and training, obeying every command and committing terrible crimes. But the doubts would not be silenced, whispering in his mind in the long dark hours of the night just as Snoke had slowly seduced him over so many years during his childhood. Snoke had sensed it as well, sensed his weakness and had sneered at him, scorned him for it. Yet the Bond he claimed to have forged had taken on a life of his own and Rey had been the conscience he never wanted or needed, the light to his darkness and the small chink of hope amid the soulless cold of his life.

Things had accelerated during the search for Palaptine, their encounters more intense and hostile. The Bond was more powerful, allowing objects to pass through as they flickered between the two dipoles of the link, debating, arguing, fighting in both and neither. Until, on the wreckage of the Death Star, she had ended him.

And part of him had welcomed it. Amid the wind and the spray, soaked and cold and desolate, he had felt her LightSaber slice though his body and as he collapsed, his life rapidly ebbing, there had been a sudden peace. No more doubts, no more ghosts, no more nightmares…no more guilt. Just peace and the silence…until she saved him. Her hand over his body, the flow of warmth from her, her life force spent in healing his wound and granting him, her mortal enemy, life. And she was weeping, her face stained with tears. She had killed him in anger-he had felt it. The sudden surge of darkness though her iridescent aura, the twist of her brows…and then the grief and guilt. Those, at least, he understood all too well. But as soon as the darkness flared, it was gone, replaced by the light once more, overcome by her inherent Rey-ness. So she had saved his life by using her own life force and then she was gone, off to face Palpatine on her own.

This time, there had been no conflict, no uncertainty as he realised what this meant. Talking to a ghost or a hallucination of his father had only crystallised his own thoughts, soothing the slightest edge of his guilt but reminding him that even as far gone as he was in darkness, there was hope. His mother had made her choice to reach out to him, burning the last of her life to do so and his Uncle had chosen to use his life force to save the remains of the Resistance-and his twin sister. And even Darth Vader, his grandfather Anakin Skywalker, had chosen at the end, surrendering his life to end Palpatine…or so he had thought. Choice was in his blood, his birthright, and when he cast his own LightSaber away, it had been easy and obvious. And right.

But she was dead. The woman he had made the choice for, the woman who had impossibly seduced him from the Dark Side to the Light, the woman he loved, was gone. He couldn't hear her at all. Nothing.

He had no idea how long he held her there, amid the dust and ruins of the Sith Temple as overhead, the Final Order was destroyed. The tears that had coursed down his cheeks had long dried, There was nothing he could do, nothing he wanted to do except sit there, holding her as a last action before his own life ebbed away. Slowly, he leaned forward and pressed a tender kiss to her forehead.

"Rey."

The word was hoarse, a groan of unspeakable pain.

"I'm sorry. I should have been with you. Together, we could have…"

He swallowed.

"I'm sorry I failed you."

Everything was fading around him, the toll of his own injuries finally demanding payment. Gently, he slid backwards, her body still clutched to his protectively. He didn't want to let her go-ever. Everything was fading, sounds becoming muffled. The last thing he felt was her body lying in his arms as the blackness claimed him.

-o0o-

Rey opened her eyes and blinked. Death was not how she had imagined it.

It was a sort of grey space, the walls shifting like a thick fog of the type she had only ever encountered on her time of Ahch-To, for Jakku was far too dry to ever manifest a mist, let alone fog. There was unseen ground underneath her feet and she felt light and alert. And the Force was everywhere, so powerful it was almost tangible. She turned around slowly, scanning her surroundings and wondering if there was some protocol that she had messed up, some cue she should have followed.

"Hello?" she called, craning her neck. "Is there anyone there?"

Silence. She frowned and walked forward a few steps.

"Hello?"

She wished she had Leia's LightSaber or her staff-something tangible-but there was nothing but what she had on her. So she walked, through the mist, the way parting as she moved and leading her…nowhere.

"Better do you feel?"

The voice was unfamiliar, a crotchety and gruff voice that took her by surprise. She recognised it from the tsunami of Jedi who had answered her desperate prayer as she lay before the regenerated Emperor but she did not know the owner or the name.

"Who are you?" she asked suspiciously. "Where are you?"

"Many questions do you have, young Rey," the voice commented and a bluish glow appeared before her. A short unknown alien with lined greyish skin, large ears and eyes brimming with wisdom appraised her thoughtfully. He wore the robes of a Jedi Master and walked with a staff.

"Rey?" The more familiar voice of Luke sounded and he appeared beside the alien. "What are you doing here?"

"I had hoped you would tell me," she said firmly, her eyes locked on his face. Then she paused. "Am I dead?"

There was an awkward silence and slowly, the Jedi Masters both nodded.

"Disorientating it is," the alien said. Rey frowned.

"This is Master Yoda, who was my teacher and the teacher for many Jedi for over eight centuries," Luke explained, his voice respectful. "We are here because…" And then he frowned and turned to the ancient Jedi Master.

"Disturbed is the Force," Yoda explained, his lined brow furrowing further. "Dead you are not meant to be. Rare, Force Dyads are and protected they must be. For the Force to balance regain, alive must you be." Frowning as she digested his words, Rey walked slowly forward and then crouched down to look into his ageless eyes.

"You mean I was not supposed to die," she said calmly. Yoda nodded.

"Unexpected was your appearance," he admitted.

"But Ben has turned to the Light," Rey reminded him. "He has redeemed himself. He fought the Knights of Ren, he stood by me, he gave me the strength to defeat Palpatine. He's still alive. Can't he…?"

"Both are required for Balance," Luke commented and he sighed. "I was wrong, Rey. You sensed there was still Light within him when I had given up on him. When I had tried to…kill him. You saved him when no one else could. I was too afraid, of failure, of the Darkness, of him…I failed you both." She rose to her feet and her face was determined.

"So what do we do?" she asked. "Is this it? Will I never get to see him again? Is this the end of my story?" Yoda raised a wrinkled finger and gave a smile that was ageless.

"Hope there is but easy it is not," the ancient Jedi Master said. "Take our hands, young Rey-but be warned. This is not an easy process."

"I'll do it," she said instantly. Luke's eyes flicked up.

"Are you sure?" he asked. "We haven't told you what it will encompass…"

"It doesn't matter," she replied evenly, the stubbornness fully the equal to that she had showed when she finally persuaded him to train her. "It feels right. It's what I have to do. And he needs me, doesn't he?"

"Possibility that may be," Yoda conceded.

"We are Bonded," Rey said. "And that draws me back to him." She looked up. "I am ready."

-o0o-

It was Finn who insisted that they go back for Rey, even as the fleet was pulling out as the last ships of the Final Order crumbled and burned on the surface of Exogol. Poe had argued that they needed to pull out with the rest but Chewie had ignored him and arched the Millennium Falcon down to land by the familiar and incongruous shapes of a X-Wing and a TIE fighter, reading the instability of the ground and cautioning the two humans with him. Heedless and sick with concern for his friend, Finn had sped down the ramp as soon as it was lowered with the Wookiee and Jannah close behind. But it was only as they approached the edge of the cavernous drop that they had realised the immensity of the task. Shattered stone from the jagged remains of gargantuan statues lay strewn around, what appeared to be enormous banks of seats were scorched and scattered with dust and the spiked and clawed shape of the Sith Throne was smashed. And lying before it were the unmistakeable shapes of two humanoids.

"It's them," Finn said as they began to scramble down the slope created by the collapse of the back of the Temple. Growling his disapproval, Chewbacca followed, his form tense. This place felt very wrong to the Wookiee and only his friendship with Rey had him moving forward. There was the stench of evil here, like a polluting smog that seemed to suck the air from the fusty space. Slight creaks of unstable masonry had them all on edge as they scrambled down what was effectively a giant jagged scree slope until the hit the floor and finally made it to the two shapes. And then all of them stopped and stared.

Rey lay in Kylo Ren's arms, his embrace tenderly encircling her and pulling her close to his body. Her eyes were staring and her lips white, her cheek resting on her chest. He had shed his armour and was in a loose tunic and pants, his face bruised and the scar dark against his pale skin. But unlike Rey, his chest still rose and fell, however shallowly.

"Rey!" Finn surged forward, tearing his friend from the grasp of the Supreme Leader of the First Order, the man who had committed so many unforgivable crimes. Dropping to his knees, Finn searched her face for something he knew would not be there. She was cold, limp, her body heavy with death and her sightless eyes were staring beyond him. Reverently, he closed them and hugged her close. "Rey," he breathed.

Chewie gave a pained roar, dropping to his knees at yet another loss in so short a time, this one tearing his heart so hard he feared it would break. All his centuries of life had not prepared him for losing Leia and now Rey so close together. But the grief subsided and the Wookiee rose and glared at the remaining supine shape. Slowly, inexorably, he lifted his Bowcaster.

Finn glanced up and his eyes widened-and then hardened. Gently resting Rey down, he rose to stand by Chewie, his blaster in his hand and levelled at the helpless man lying before them.

"Together," he said, his voice hard. Sparing a curt nod, the Wookiee turned his gaze back to Kylo Ren.

Except he wasn't. There was no armour, no weapons, no trappings of the First Order. The darkness that they all sensed seething off him like waves of heat was gone. There was no anger, no hatred or cruelty in his face: it was the face of a young man at repose, vulnerable and gentle. And with Rey moved, they could see more wounds, a probably-broken leg and injuries from a furious battle.

Chewie shook his head and lifted his weapon again, willing himself to fire. But there was a voice in the back of his mind that whispered that this was Han's son, not an enemy. That this was a misguided young man who had been a pawn in the games of people far more evil and calculated than he ever had been. And that he had been here, embracing Rey, tenderly holding her in his arms like a lover.

At his side, Finn lowered his blaster.

"You hear it too," he murmured. Chewie concurred. "I'm Force sensitive-just enough for instincts, not for all that fancy stuff. It's telling me…not to kill him." With a resigned grumble, the Wookiee nodded. Finn snapped his blaster back up again. "And I really should ignore it. He is the Supreme Leader. He killed Han. He killed hundreds of our friends. He committed countless war crimes. He probably killed Rey."

" _No,_ " Chewie snapped in his own language. Finn sighed.

"Okay, probably not," he admitted. "But we can't leave him here-or Rey." There was a pause and Chewie glanced up at the lip of the entrance and gave a small pointed roar. "Okay-but I'm not carrying him. I'm taking Rey." Jannah stared at them in shock.

"You're not killing him where he lies?" she asked incredulously. Shaking his head, Finn holstered his blaster.

"Looks like we're not," he admitted in a chagrinned voice.

"But why? He is your enemy! He is everyone's enemy…" Her tone was angry. Finn sighed.

"Because we both feel we need to take him back to the Base," he explained. "Though Poe will probably have him executed anyway…"

"Then…"

"Look-in this business, you learn to trust your feelings," Finn explained. "And both Rey and Kylo Ren are powerful Forcer Users. If the Force wants us to keep him alive, I'm not arguing. There must be something else he's wanted for." And then he sighed. "If I refused to shoot innocent unarmed women and children, it doesn't feel right to kill an unconscious man, no matter what he has done."

"I'll do it for you!" Jannah snapped but Finn shook his head as Chewie stepped between her and the unconscious man. Deliberately, he scooped Ben's wounded shape in his arms and turned to start the long drag back up to the ship. Casting him a frustrated look and snorting, Jannah followed, leaving Finn to reverently lift up Rey's body.

"I think this is going to be a long ride back," he muttered to himself. "And Poe will probably kill him anyway…"


	2. Two

**A/N: Time to thank Vala411 for additional plot points and some very good suggestions. And also being an unofficial Beta.**

**TWO:**

Consciousness returned swiftly, as was usual. Somehow in his life, he seemed to have had more than his fair share of unpleasant awakenings, frequently after nightmares but also from crashes, explosions, Snoke’s punishments and of course, that night when he found Luke standing over him, a Lightsaber fizzing in his hand and a look of disgust on his face…

Sensations returned and immediately, he realised he was alone. Rey was gone, her body no longer clutched in his grasp and a faint sensation of panic fluttered in his chest. Firmly, he tamped it down: Rey was dead, her spirit melded with the Force as was her just reward for her heroism in ending the threat of Palpatine, once and for all. And maybe, that would mean he could reach for her, call for her…see her. Force Ghosts were not something the Sith considered though the Jedi revered their predecessors and visitations from an old Master were not infrequent when a Jedi needed guidance and a gentle pointer. Or so Luke had said. But did he qualify? Was he entitled to reach for her when his redemption had been incomplete and his crimes so heinous?

He moved slightly and realised that he was lying supine on a hard metal bed that was barely long enough for his tall frame. He could feel the familiar sensation of Bacta patches on his wounds and there was a gentle throbbing in his leg where there had been pain. Someone had treated his wounds-but as he tried to sit up, he realised there were binders around his wrists, the metal digging into his flesh and attaching him to the bed. Instinctively, he pulled against the restraints and reached for the Force to pry the simple restraints apart-and then he found…nothing.

His eyes snapped wide open and he took a couple of very fast, very anxious breaths. The Bond was a void of blackness, nothing where Rey should be-but now his connection to the Force was attenuated almost to the point of nullity. Was this his punishment, the price he paid for betraying the Sith and turning away from Darth Sidious or was it a side-effect of his injuries. Was this why he had failed Rey?

But then he lifted his head and he grimaced, his vision swimming and head spinning lightly. Nausea was roiling in his stomach and his limbs felt appreciably heavier than usual as he strained to move: he had been drugged. The twin emotions of relief and concern warred. Relief that he hadn’t lost his power mixed with concern that someone had gone to the trouble to drug him enough to suppress his powers instead of killing him outright. That equation did not add up to a promising scenario. But who was his jailer and what could he expect from his hosts?

Except a swift and public death for his crimes, he thought grimly, resting his head back and closing his eyes. It had to be the Resistance, since the Final Order had been annihilated at the battle of Exegol, though that realisation filled him with no confidence at all. He had led the efforts to exterminate them and now they had won, would they be inclined to mercy for the highest ranked First Order Officer? Or would his death be proof of victory and satisfy the very humanoid need for revenge?

“I know you’re awake.” The door had opened while he was thinking and he lay still, hearing two bodies move to a few feet to his right and he forced his eyes open. He frowned slightly as his vision focussed and he recognised the deserter FN-2187, Finn as Rey had called him and Poe Dameron. The latter had his blaster aimed directly at Ben’s head and he nodded.

“That’s correct,” he said neutrally. “I am awake.” Poe’s face twisted in anger.

“Y’know, I can’t think of one good reason why I don’t blow your head off, here and now,” he growled.

“It would be a waste of the efforts your medics have put into patching me up,” Ben replied evenly, his dark gaze fixed on the pilot’s face.

“I could live with that,” Poe said, his aim never wavering.

“You aren’t a cold-blooded killer,” Ben suggested. Poe twitched.

“You are,” he ground out through his teeth.

“The Resistance stands for more than that.” Ben’s voice was a calm statement.

“No one will care.”

“Rey would.”

Even without access to the force, it was easy to sense the fury emanating from Poe and-to a lesser extent-Finn. But the tactician in Ben knew that Rey was his only leverage, though explaining their bond, getting any non-Force User to believe it would be an uphill struggle.

“Don’t mention her name!” Finn snapped, as Ben sagged into the bed. He took a deep breath.

“Do you know why I was there?” he asked them.

“Serving Palpatine, helping him and the Final Order launch your fleet to crush all resistance across the Galaxy!” Finn said though his voice didn’t sound wholly convinced.

“You’d already destroyed Kijimi as a demonstration-or had you forgotten that?” Poe added sharply.

“No,” Ben sighed. This was going pretty much as he had expected. Though he wasn’t dead yet, which was kind of a win.

“Then…”

“I was there for her. For Rey,” he said with more force than he had intended. “I was there because Rey won. She was right. Somewhere in Kylo Ren, Ben Solo still existed. She found a way to finally kill Kylo Ren.”

“How?” Finn’s tone was inquisitive-he had been there on Kef Bir above Endor, though he hadn’t seen the battle on the wreckage of the Death Star II from close enough quarters to understand everything that had happened. All he had known was that Rey had flown away and Ren had been alive. Ben’s brow furrowed, his eyes resigned.

“She killed me,” he said simply. “Or as close as. She ran me through, furious with me for everything, for destroying the Sith Wayfinder, for thwarting her, for being the Monster she wanted me not to be, for disappointing her in Snoke’s Throne Room by offering her a chance to join me, for being the Supreme Leader of the First Order. For not allowing her to save me. And as I lay there, dying, she knelt down and saved me. She spared my life using her own life force to heal the lethal wound she had just inflicted on me. She was distraught that she had struck me in anger-because that isn’t who she wanted to be. So she spared my life, despite who I was and what I had done. And then she went to face him. She took my ship, which had the other Wayfinder in.”

“So she spared you,” Poe sneered shifting his weight slightly but never moving the muzzle of his blaster by a millimetre.

“I can’t explain,” he murmured, pressing his lips together as he tried to frame his words. “The instant before she struck, I heard my mother. She reached out to me, touched me, called to me as her son, not as an enemy, not as the man who tried to crush the Resistance and exterminate them all-including her. Not as the man who murdered her husband. Not as Kylo. As Ben. And then I felt her die.” He faltered and there was pain in his voice. “And then Rey expends her own life force to heal me. Because she didn’t want to kill me, the person my mother had used the last of her life to reach out to. Even though she struck the killing blow herself, she saved me when she should have watched me die.”

“Yeah, that’s Rey,” Finn murmured. “Loves an underdog, will help the helpless and befriend the friendless.”

_And I qualify for at least a couple of those definitions,_ Ben thought silently.

“I had a decision to make,” Ben continued slowly. “To be the person I was, manipulated and lied to and abused until I became what Snoke and Palpatine made me, their weapon and servant. Or to be the son my mother died to try to reach.” He stared at the ceiling. “He came to see me.”

“Who?” Finn asked.

“Han. Dad.” Ben looked over at the two Resistance Generals and offered the finest shadow of a smile. “He said nothing but that I wouldn’t expect. I am pretty sure it was his ghost through the Force but I’m still not completely sure it wasn’t my own subconscious, supplying me the reinforcement I needed to make the only decision I could. I have been manipulated most of my life and even though I have made many of my own decisions, many more have been…directed.” He exhaled. “I threw it away. My Lightsaber. My armour. My coms. Everything I could use to reach the First Order. I just needed to follow Rey. To help her. Because I knew…she couldn’t do it alone. Alone, she would be subverted or killed and Palpatine would reign.”

“Rey would never…” Finn cut in hotly and Poe added his voice to the protest.

“Palpatine had her cornered,” Ben told them. “He threatened to annihilate the Resistance, wipe out whole worlds unless she joined him. Unless she surrendered to him. She was to strike him down and he would assume her body, being reborn. And then…the Final Order would rule forever.”

“How do you know all this?” Poe asked him suspiciously, his eyes narrowing as he glared at the prisoner. Ben looked directly into his eyes.

“Rey and I shared a Force Bond,” he said clearly.

“What?” Finn asked.

“You mean you invaded her mind and ransacked it like you did mine!” Poe growled and lurched forward, the muzzle resting hard against Ben’s temple. “You kriffing monster. You raped her mind like you did mine and used her like…”

“NO!” The denial was vehement and for a second, the blackness of anger surged through him but he pushed it away. Never again would he allow it to control him as it had for so many years! Instead, words tumbled over his lips as he tried to make the pilot understand and knowing that no words would ever explain the bond truly. “No-I would never hurt Rey. Never. We have been bonded since Starkiller, I think. I saw her with Luke on Ahch-To while she was training, allowing me to converse with her. And yes, I tried to enter her mind-and she entered mine, seeing things I never wanted her-or anyone-to see. We even physically touched through the bond…” He paused and calmed himself. “I saw her on Kijimi, I sensed her heading to Kef Bir and met her there. She passed her LightSaber to me through the Bond while I was losing to the Knights of Ren on Exegol. I felt her die. I tried to get her back. I tried to get her back…” He swallowed again. “I tried to give her my life…but it didn’t work.”

“Why should it?” Finn asked, his eyes confused.

“Because I poured everything through the bond,” Ben said, his voice raw with pain. “But she was gone. I would happily have given everything to her. Everything. But she’s free.”

Abruptly, Poe pulled back and holstered his blaster.

“I’m keeping guards on the door,” he said. “You will remain here until you are fit for a cell. You will remain drugged and unable to use the Force. You’re not going anywhere.”

“Except before a firing squad,” Ben said quietly. Poe flinched.

“We’ve already had seventeen worlds contact us to render you to them for justice,” he said as Finn cast an uneasy look at the former Supreme Commander.

“Only seventeen?” Ben commented, the corner of his mouth lifted in a slight smirk. “I should be insulted.”

“Don’t be,” Poe snapped. “Word gets around. There will be more. And bounty hunters. And a few of our own people will feel like taking a pop at you as well-hence the guards.”

“Unless they are the guards,” Ben reminded him. Finn nodded.

“He has a point,” he murmured into Poe’s ear.

“I always used to change the allocations of my guards randomly, since Hux commanded a high degree of devotion from his men and changing them around tended to scupper any he may have persuaded to try to murder their Supreme Commander,” Ben added wryly. “And I never trusted any of his guards in any case.”

“Doesn’t sound like a friendly place,” Poe snarked and Ben closed his eyes.

“To be in the First Order is to be alone,’ he said as Finn nodded absently, his eyes unfocussing for a second. “No friends, no family, no ties at all. But Rey, who had no one, strove to build ties, to create a family where she had none.”

“You had parents-and you betrayed and murdered them!” Poe growled as Ben grimaced.

“My Mother made her own choices,” he sighed, not admitting the murder of his father that he would never atone for. “But she used her last remaining life force to reach me so yes, I bear responsibility for her death.” Taking a shuddering breath, Poe headed for the door.

“I hope our guards are more reliable,” he commented as he swung out of the door. Finn paused for a longer moment.

“You were in Rey’s head?” he asked, the tiny flare of jealousy subliminal and almost imperceptible. _Almost_. Ben nodded.

“Intermittently,” he confessed. “It was like a door that could be pulled open or closed from either side…but which sometimes swung open of its own accord. I could feel strong emotions, thoughts sometimes…but she became better and better at shielding herself from me.”

“Can’t think why,” Finn said and then he paused. “You’re only alive because of Rey. You were holding her when we found you. You looked like you were protecting her.” He tensed against the binders because he was getting cramped but really, there was nothing more to say. Except one thing.

“Where is she?’ he asked, his brow furrowing again.

“Her body is in stasis while we try to clean up after the battle,” Finn revealed. “The place is still crazy. And we need to do it right…” Ben shook his head, his dark eyes flooded with confusion.

“You don’t understand,” he said gruffly. “She’s a Force User, a Jedi! There shouldn’t be a body, because she’s become one with the force. Unless she wasn’t allowed to become one. But…she was all Light. There was no darkness in her. She rejected Palpatine. She shouldn’t be denied the peace of eternity within the Force.” He looked at Finn.

“Something is wrong.”


	3. Three

**Three:**

No one came. Finn and Poe didn't return and there was no one else who really wanted to talk to him-though he strongly suspected many people wanted to have the kind of 'talk' that ended in blood and pain, curled on the ground, struggling to breathe or in the swift thrust of a knife or the fading whine of a blaster shot. They dispatched a droid to check his wounds and ensure that they were healing as planned and to administer a further shot of whatever they had drugged him with but they didn't provide food or even water and he found his throat growing parched and his lips cracked.

Then the guards came in, stone-faced and brusque, unlocking the binders and unceremoniously hauling his large frame from the inadequate bed. His head spun at the sudden, vicious change of position and he pressed his lips together to forestall any sort of groan, though he guessed they would see the scrunching of his brow. His injured leg stabbed a sharp jab of pain as he was dragged along, The corridors were suddenly crowded with members of the Resistance, all stationery and glaring at him. Some remaining spark of pride had him straightening up his tall frame and pulling his broad shoulders back, lifting his chin to meet their contempt. And he had never been more glad that his connection with the Force was almost completely suppressed. The intensity of the hatred in every eye was stunning, the emotion almost crackling about the watchers: it would have been a literal hurricane, howling in his ears if he could still feel it through the force. Taking a deep breath, and feeling a throbbing in the back of his head, he lowered his eyes.

It was a relief when they shoved him into the cell and the door slammed behind him, walling off all those glaring eyes. Pausing for a long moment, he limped over to the simple ledge that served as a bed and slumped down to sit on the edge, briefly covering his face and then running his fingers back through his hair. And then he rose, ignoring the gentle vertigo and limped back and forth across the small cell, trying to work the kinks out of his body from being immobilised for so long and trying to think. First and foremost, he needed to get out of the cell. Poe and Finn were probably the only people here who would even grant him a thought before trying to kill him-and only for Rey. The rest…well, he was pretty sure they would shoot him out of hand. Unconsciously rubbing his wrists and trying to ease the red weals from his binders, he turned and limped back across the cell.

And there was Rey. Back on Exegol, he had been injured, exhausted, drained…but here, he could think a little more clearly. And he knew that something was wrong. There should be no body, no remains. Jedi merged with the force when they died, leaving artefacts but no body.

 _Vader was cremated,_ he reminded himself. _Though he had spent decades as a Sith and in any case, Rey was no Vader._ He paused. Nor was he, though he had spent wasted years trying to be. His fist curled instinctively, a surge of anger and disgust at himself rising and he took a shuddering breath. It would be easy to fall back into old, familiar patterns, allowing himself to be drawn back into the dark. The darkness was always there, a part of him, an old friend. Becoming Ben Solo was a conscious choice, one that he would have to live with-including all of its consequences. He forced his hand to uncurl without punching the wall.

Time was running out. The Council of whoever was left in the Resistance would be meeting and they would decide his fate. From the reaction of the Resistance members, it didn't take any imagination to figure out what that would be. No matter what happened, no matter his decision, the sacrifice he had made, the battle he had fought...Rey was dead. And without her, he stood less chance than the inhabitants of the Hosnian System had against the Starkiller weapon. Lifting his head, he peered at the door.

He was going to have to escape.

-o0o-

Time seemed immaterial in the strange fog of the Force. She had been walking, hand in hand with Luke and Yoda forever-or it could have been a few seconds. But the conversation had gently faded and they just walked together, slower than Rey would normally have moved because even here, in the unreal realm of the Force, Yoda seemed to be old and limped along with the help of a staff.

"Impatient are you," the ancient master commented, a definite edge of amusement on his voice. Glancing sideways, she saw him inspect her with a definite smile on his face. She frowned.

"I just can't see why all this walking through nothing is relevant-or even happening?" she commented. "If the Force is just energy, created by all things, then why do we have to walk through it? Why can't we just be there?"

"Good questions," Yoda conceded. "Care you to answer, my Padawan Apprentice?" Luke sighed.

"The Force is not an even field," he explained. "There are areas where it is thin and easy to pass through and in other areas, there are dangerous eddies and traps, cul-de-sacs that could entrap you for eternity..."

"Like the space below the Jedi Temple," she realised. He nodded.

"There are others-including those around areas where the Sith were powerful," he explained. "And the area we need to go is in one of those places. We have to get to an interface where it will be possible to allow you to return as a corporeal entity."

"As opposed to this," she murmured, staring at herself. "A ghost?"

Luke nodded.

"Only Masters and trained Jedi can see Force Ghosts," he explained.

"Then why can't I see Ben?" she asked directly. "If he and I are...a dyad, if we share this unique bond, why can I not hear him through it. Why can't I see him?"

"Again good questions," Yoda told her. "But this time, no answers have we. Wrong this is."

"Something has subverted your bond," Luke frowned as the fog finally billowed and then vanished. They were suddenly in a white, fractal realm. "The question is...who?"

-o0o-

"YOU KNOW WHAT THE ANSWER IS!"

The shout sounded from the back of the chamber as the leadership of the Resistance met to discuss the obvious problem. The celebrations had been concluded, the ceremony to remember Leia and honour Rey, whose body was still held in stasis. No one was sure what to do but Finn had prevented her being cremated as had been done for Darth Vader after his demise because Kylo Ren's words in the cell still echoed through his mind. And if there was a chance something was wrong, it felt like a betrayal of his friend to burn her body until...

He blinked. _Until what?_ She returned from the dead? Or he accepted that she was gone? Fortunately, so far Poe and Maz Kanata had supported him. In fact, the ancient alien had given a serene smile and murmured that protecting Rey was the only right thing to do.

But the meeting had been turbulent and everyone had an opinion and wanted to be heard. Pretty much every member of the Resistance had lost someone, usually in a battle that Ren had commanded if not been personally involved in. That he had been Supreme Leader was not in doubt and the fact that he had hounded the Resistance almost to extinction and slain hundreds of people personally in battle was not questioned either. That no one really wanted to offer any sort of chance was hardly a surprise either.

Finn glanced around, only mildly surprised at the vehemence of feeling. Poe had been silent and so had Lando Calrissian as everyone in attendance was given a chance to offer his or her opinion and as he looked around the people he had come to know well, he realised that there was only going to be one outcome. Everyone was baying for blood and the majority were calling for death. Controlling his face, he looked over to Poe and saw the pilot-turned-General frown slightly.

"Not looking good," he murmured as Finn nodded.

"What more can you say?" he whispered back. "That he claims he's turned to the light side and helped Rey kill Palpatine? That he tried to save her. Who would believe him? I'm not sure even I believe him!"

"Rey would know," Poe commented. "But no one can contact her. She was the last Jedi. There are no more..." Finn sighed.

"I'm Force sensitive but that only gives me some instincts," he sighed. "And I'm not sure how that is changed by his use of the Force."

"Though we have him drugged," Poe admitted.

"What would Rey do?" Finn murmured. Maz leaned forward.

"What would Rey do?" she offered. "What did she do the last time they faced?" Poe glanced over at Finn.

"You and Jannah were there," he reminded his friend. "I was mending the Falcon." Frowning, Finn shook his head.

"They fought," he said slowly. "She won. She let him live." Maz smiled.

"Then there is your answer," she said softly. "She chose not to kill him. She chose life. We fought for freedom. Should we start the future with revenge on the past?"

"Perhaps...where crimes have to be punished," Poe said slowly. "And some of the way to build the future is to acknowledge the sins of the past and ensure they are punished. That those who committed the worst crimes pay the price, to draw a line under the old regime, the conflict."

"The leaders die but the conscripts have the opportunity to return to their old lives-or new ones," Lando murmured, casting a look over at Jannah. Finn took a deep breath.

"Are we really doing this?" he murmured. "Are you saying Leia would allow this?"

There was a pause.

"He was her son-but she knew the deeds he committed," Maz mused. "Though she never gave up on the hope of saving him. She spent the last of her life in trying to reach him. Maybe she didn't do that in the hope we would then execute him if he did turn…"

The shouts continued and Finn registered that Rose was speaking. He sighed as she added her voice to the consensus that Kylo Ren should be tried for his war crimes and then executed.

"She never believed it was possible," Finn murmured. "Peace is fragile and if we refuse…do you think they won't do it anyway?"

"That's no reason not to try," Lando suggested thoughtfully. "When Leia and the leaders of the Rebellion started the New Republic, there was a vote to attack the Empire academies. Leia of course was against it but she was outvoted. It tore her heart out that they would condone such an attack as she had never intended the New Republic to stand for revenge."

"And look how that turned out," Poe commented as Finn and Lando looked at him. "Those survivors became the seed of the First Order. It's why they cheered as the Hosnian system burned. Every side had its scars."

"Except..." Finn rose, his eyes troubled. "Ren said something was wrong, that Rey should be one with the Force," he said passionately. "That there should be nothing left, like with Leia. But her body is still here. And if there is something wrong, then we owe it to Rey to find out what it is. What if it's preventing her moving on? Or she's trapped somewhere? Or she could even be brought back…?" He glanced over at Poe. "You carry on here-and don't let them do anything yet. Ren may be the only person who can clarify this, if there is any hope for Rey. She's our friend and if there is anything we can do to help her, I think we have to. No matter who it involves. So I need to ask some questions. And this time, I'm not taking no for an answer…"


	4. Four

**Four:**

_Maybe this was it like just to be Force sensitive, rather than a master of directing and controlling the power._ No matter how much he tried, there was nothing there and no amount of concentration could compel the energy to flow. So Ben Solo, formerly Kylo Ren, had to resort to prying the wall panel off by the door, ripping a deep cut in the palm of his hand in the process, and trying to bypass the locking circuits.

In truth, it hadn't been too difficult for someone who had spent the first half of his childhood in _the Millennium Falcon_ , watching his father and Chewie tinker with the sometimes capricious and often malfunctioning circuits of the modified freighter and who had learned the theory of and then built his own LightSaber. Door locking circuits were pretty much the same whichever side you were on after all. The trick was choosing the time to open the door when someone wouldn't be passing or watching, so he had been reduced to trusting his feelings, listening very hard and praying silently that someone was looking out for him. But he had paused for a few moments before poking his head round the door, ducking in case a blaster tried to take it off, and then he had emerged, checking both directions and then touching the panel to close the door behind him. There was no guard, something that troubled him, for Poe had promised. But maybe they had assumed he was secure in the cell...or maybe they trusted that their own people would respect the wishes of their commanders in keeping him alive-for now.

He wasn't exactly designed for stealth, he realised as he tried to stay in the shadows. He was really too large to sneak around and the base seemed a little light on handy nooks and crannies that could be used to conceal himself-or even much in the way of shadows at all. The natural cave system was utilised skilfully to provide as much space as the Resistance required but the corridors were wide with almost no cover.. Pausing, head bowed, he listened-and then managed to cram himself behind a bank of fuel pipes as two guards marched by, avidly discussing a meeting...about him. Rolling his eyes, he listened without surprise that both were in favour of shooting him-the sooner the better. Taking another quick breath, he ducked towards the clearing that functioned as the hanger…

...and then he stopped. There was something tugging at him, a strong feeling that he needed to go in the opposite direction. He gritted his teeth. His life was in imminent danger and if he was found escaping, he was pretty certain someone would use it as a convenient excuse they needed to blast him-but despite all rationality, he had been trained over the years by Luke and Snoke and both had emphasised that he should listen to his feelings. Growling in his throat in frustration, he turned and ran back down the corridor past his cell and left at the intersection, heading further back into the base.

It was only when he arrived in a silent, cool chamber containing a stasis chamber that he understood. Before him, softly lit and preserved against the corruption of time, was Rey. Her white lips were slightly apart and her eyes closed but she looked almost as if she was sleeping. Only her absolute stillness and the fact he could feel nothing over their Bond confirmed to him that she was gone and this wasn't some horrible nightmare.

Slowly, he walked forward, still limping slightly and never taking his eyes off her peaceful face. He could still recall the last moments through their bond as he hung from that ledge in the pit where he had fallen, her steely determination a beacon as she crossed the Sabers across her body and thrust Palpatine's Sith Lightning back at him, scorching his malignant presence out of the Universe. But the backwash was always going to be too much for one person, the strain overwhelming her systems and granting her only a few moments of peace, of realisation that she had finally won before she, too, died. And he had been too weak, too late, too useless to save her.

_He had failed her. As he had failed everyone in his life. Luke, Snoke, Dad. Mom. And now Rey._

Not even aware that he had walked to the side of the stasis chamber, he rested his hand on the smooth plass, feeling the slight hum of the energy that preserved her against the ravages of entropy. Closing his eyes, he reached out for her, straining to try to feel her one last time through the ruptured fabric of their Bond. The blackness seemed to burn the inside of his eyelids, the effort throbbing through his head. But under his hand, the throbbing of the stasis field grew a little more obvious, as if it was having to strain to maintain everything as it had been.

"Rey," he breathed. "Rey. Please listen. I'm sorry. I tried. I tried. I should have been there. I should have been able to bring you back instead of me, And if there was any way I could bring you back, I would. I just wish you could give me a sign that you understand. Please…"

-o0o-

" _Rey._ "

Her head snapped up and she peered into the fractal walls that surrounded her, the iridescence shifting and darkening slightly. She squinted at the crazy patterns and then her breath hitched, eyes widening.

The tall, dark shape of a man, head bowed with black hair framing his face.

Ben.

"BEN!" she yelled.

"Distracted you must not be," Yoda warned her to her left side, his grasp on her hand growing tighter. "Persistent the Dark Side is."

"But it's Ben!" she protested, pointing at the shape, mirrored in every fractal surface so a million Bens all swirled around her. "He's trying to reach me."

" _I'm sorry. I tried. I tried. I should have been there. I should have been able to bring you back instead of me, And if there was any way I could bring you back, I would._ "

"BEN! I hear you. And I-I know! It's okay. Luke and Master Yoda are helping me figure it out. Don't give up hope! I will come back to you!" She reached out and slammed her hands against the suddenly solid surface. "BEN! Don't give up!"

"Rey! You can't reach him!" Luke told her, pulling her back from the crystalline surface. "This region of the Force is a barrier, slung around an area of deep Darkness and Evil that we tried to prevent from polluting the rest of this system. He won't hear you."

"BEN!" she shouted as she saw his head bow more. "Be with me."

His head snapped up.

And then everything was chaos.

-o0o-

The generators were really struggling, the throbbing almost painful through his hand as he splayed his fingers on the gentle curve of medical plass above her face. His head was exploding with the effort but he ignored the pain: that, at least, was familiar from his training under Snoke. And he had complied, straining his body and mind almost to breaking point to impress a creature that was the tool of Palpatine and who had bent and broken the remains of Ben Solo to create Kylo Ren.

His head snapped up as he saw her coalesce from thin air just the other side of the stasis chamber from him, dressed as he recalled from Exegol. She was staring at him, her hands raised and beating against some unseen barrier-though she was flickering in and out and he could clearly see the far wall of the chamber through her. Her lips mouthed his name over and over as she fought to get to him.

But there was no sound, no warmth, no link at all. The Bond remained severed and that was even more disturbing that seeing her ghost, fighting and struggling to get to him against some barrier he couldn't even imagine. A sharp dagger of guilt stabbed his heart and he stared at her, redoubling his efforts to reach her.

"Rey. I will reach you," he repeated. Her head looked sideways briefly, as if listening to another person-and then she turned back to scream his name again. "Somehow, I will find a way to get you back…" he promised.

She shattered into unbearable light and the backwash tossed him across the room as if he was nothing. The stone of the wall met his head and he slammed to the floor and slumped, dazed as she vanished. His ears were ringing, his vision was whited out and he could feel the sticky sensation of blood on his forehead. For long moments, he lay helpless, blood smeared on his pale skin before he finally raised his head and peered at the stasis chamber. And then he scrambled to his feet in shock. For the stasis chamber was now empty, not even the clothes that she had worn remaining as they always did when a Jedi became one with the Force.

Rey was gone.

Blinking, head still spinning, he turned and sprinted down the corridor, ducking into doorways and finding another entrance to the hanger clearing. But there were a lot more people suddenly milling around, discussing the meeting and he had to duck back innumerable times until he saw a way, dashing behind a large container and then inching along until he could get a clear view of his target: the familiar white freighter that he had known as long as he had lived, the shape that had been pretty much omnipresent since the destruction of the New Republic, always there thwarting the First Order. The _Millennium Falcon_.

He felt the jab of a blaster between his shoulder blades and he stiffened, taking a shuddering breath before he slowly turned to look into Finn's face.

"I could ask how you managed to get out but really, I shouldn't be surprised," the former Stormtrooper said grimly, backing away out of reach.

"Your security leaves something to be desired," Ben commented, remaining still.

"Thanks for the head's up," Finn shot back sarcastically. "You know I should shoot you."

"You and everyone else." The words were bitter.

"Hey! You don't get to feel sorry for yourself!" Finn hissed. "Most of these people have lost family, friends-even their entire worlds-thanks to you!"

"Me personally?" The retort was dry. Finn wavered.

"Maybe not all you-but you're Supreme Leader…"

"Was."

"For about half an hour before the end," Finn corrected him, his brows dipping. "The rest of the time…well, we know you deserve everything you get. And then some. So what are you doing, Ren?"

"I am Ben Solo," he said, repeating the words to try to convince himself, to remind himself of the new reality of his situation. Of the choice that he had made. He gestured towards the Resistance members beyond and then held his fingers a millimeter apart. "And I think we both know I am about this far from a firing squad."

"Yeah- and escaping is gonna really convince them that you're trustworthy and should be given any sort of a chance."

"I saw her," Ben said, the words tumbling out of his lips as he leaned slightly towards the shorter man. Finn pointedly aimed his gun straight at Ben's face. Forcing himself, the prisoner raised his hands slightly. "I saw Rey."

"Because we both know that I'm her friend and she's a sore spot," Finn growled "That's a cheap shot." Growling in his throat, Ben took a deep breath.

"It's true," he ground out through his teeth. "I found her body. I spoke to her. And I saw her...ghost. But I couldn't hear her. At all. I tried to reach her...but there was feedback, an explosion. And she was gone…" Finn frowned.

"Your head is bleeding," he pointed out. Automatically, Ben touched the point of impact and stared at the red smear on his fingers.

"I suspect other parts of me will be bleeding if I don't get out of here!" he hissed. "Rey's body has gone. But she was yelling to me. She's in trouble. I know it." He paused and swallowed. "I need your help."

Finn stared at him in shock.

"You are seriously asking me to help when you almost cut me in half on the Starkiller Base?" he asked incredulously.

"Well, if you could find someone who doesn't want to kill me outright for everything that happened before my mother and Rey reached me, then I'll happily ask him," he said sarcastically. "But you are here and now and if I don't get off this planet, I am dead. And Rey will never be able to come back." Finn's face twisted into a scowl.

"I can't believe I'm saying this," he muttered. "You really think you can help her?"

Ben nodded.

"I have to," he admitted. "She is bonded to me, she spared my life and without her, I pretty much have nothing else worth existing for. When she spared me, she told me she had wanted to take my hand…take _Ben's_ hand. She used her own life force to save me. And I tried to repay her on Exegol. It didn't work then. If there is one chance in a million that I can try again, that I can save her, then I have to try. No matter the cost." He paused and gave a slight, grim smile. "And without her, I have everyone in the galaxy on my tail."

"I could just shoot you now," Finn told him and then lifted a com. "Rose. I've had a strange feeling. Can you do me a favour and check on Rey please?"

" _Of course, Finn,_ " the woman said calmly over the link. Ben huffed.

"We're going to stay here until your friend checks out my story?" he asked.

"You think I'm going to let you out of my sight and get onto a ship out of here?" Finn shot back. "I know you can fly. I can't. And the way you're looking at the _Falcon_ , I'm pretty sure I know which ship you were planning on hijacking."

"And you aren't about to be shot by everyone here?" Ben hissed back. He ducked behind the container as a couple of pilots swung past, waving at Finn who managed a sheepish grin and just managing to hide the blaster behind his back. He waved before glaring back at Ben.

"Nope-just spent a year almost being shot by you," he retorted.

" _Finn?_ "

"Rose?" The young General lifted his com.

" _Finn-she's gone! Her stasis container is empty. Someone has stolen her body!_ " Her voice was distraught and he couldn't help the accusing look he shot at Ben. The former Supreme Leader shrugged.

"You're welcome to search me," he said dryly.

"Rose-calm down," Finn said slowly. "Check the area. She may have woken. Or someone has moved her. Check with the Medical techs first and then tell Poe!"

" _Okay,_ " the engineer said in a shaky voice and the connection closed.

"How do I know you didn't just vaporise it?" Finn asked Ben and the prisoner rolled his eyes.

"So you believe she's gone?" he asked, ignoring the inference. "Why would I vaporise a dead woman when I could be light years away already? And by the way-I could have gotten that blaster off you about a dozen times by now."

"You could have tried," Finn growled. "So what did happen? You have some explaining to do!" Ben shook his head.

"It's not like I know myself," he confessed. "But I was going to find out. I have to. I'm the Galaxy's most wanted man-and Rey is literally the only person who would speak up for me."

"Not sure even she could save you," Finn retorted.

"She already did once," Ben murmured. "And she's amazingly stubborn."

"So how do you plan to find out what happened to Rey?" Finn demanded. Ben ducked back behind the container again as a couple of maintenance techs wandered past.

"Could we just get to the ship?" he hissed. "Any minute, someone is gonna find out I'm not in my cell."

"How?" Finn insisted and Ben clasped his hands together, as if praying.

"There is a legend about the planet Dathomir," he murmured. "The legend says the line between life and death is non-existent there." Finn stared at him.

"You expect me to go chasing after some crazy legend?" he asked incredulously.

"You went chasing after Luke, didn't you?" Ben shot back and Finn felt like he'd been punched in the gut. "So either shoot me or I am boarding that ship."

Finn glared at him for another moment then lowered his blaster.

"I'm coming with you," he said as Ben ducked behind two more containers that shielded his escape from the main entrance to the Resistance Base and then he dashed up the ramp of the _Falcon_. Shaking his head and muttering that he really couldn't believe that he was doing this, Finn ran after him. Blinking at the familiar interior of _the Millennium Falcon,_ he found himself recalling Rey's face when they first got on board the old freighter...and then he rounded a corner and stared at the sight of Kylo Ren choking, his feet a few inches off the ground with Chewbacca's hand tightening around his throat.


	5. Five

**Five.**

The grip around his neck tightened and Ben felt himself clawing at the steel-sinewed Wookiee arm that held him in its grasp. Chewbacca was glaring at him and howling what were definitely not greetings and he kicked and mentally clawed for the Force but it was still walled off by the drugs. All he could manage was a small gasp and realise that this must be what it was like when he Force-choked those annoying subordinates.

_The Universe was definitely trying to repay him for all of his misdeeds…_

"Chewie!" Finn's voice cut across the furious yowls and the Wookiee spared him a glance before continuing to strangle the former Supreme Leader of the First Order. Rolling his eyes, he took a deep breath. "Chewie! He's with me!"

The Wookiee stared at him, his hand still tight around the throat of the man who had killed his best friend. The _son_ of his best friend. He gave an inquisitive growl. And even though he didn't understand Wookiee, Finn could gather the gist of the question.

"Okay, so I'm sort of...kidnapping him...but I need to get him off here-and fast," Finn offered, casting an apologetic look at the Wookiee. "Please. I think...it may help Rey." Growling, Chewie hoisted Ben a little higher...and then flung him hard across the passageway, the impact echoing through the ship with a resounding clang. Gasping for air and rubbing his throat, Ben slowly looked up.

 _Okay-I can really see why Hux hated me so much,_ he considered silently as he gradually levered himself to his knees. _And the others. But then I sought fear rather than loyalty. Snoke wouldn't have suffered any other way_. The young General had closed to a couple of feet from the Wookiee and was speaking in a low voice, offering an explanation. Absently, he listened in, having learned to understand Wookiee when he was much younger. There had been a time when young Ben had craved his father's love and approval, when he would have done anything if his father had shown he loved him, if he had stayed. So he learned Wookiee so he could understand Chewie, he learned the systems of the modified freighter and he certainly learned how to fly so one day, he could make his father proud. Except, of course, his father and mother had sent him away, rejecting him for the power that he had no say in inheriting.

Shoving the familiar black feelings aside, he rose and stumbled towards the cockpit, the way recalling all sorts of memories. He took a deep breath at the doorway before he moved forward.

And found himself hauled back by a roaring Chewie. His throat still bruising from the Wookiee's welcome, he raised his hands and allowed himself to be shoved back into the passageway.

"Okay," he conceded swiftly. "So who's going to fly?"

 _"_ _Me,"_ Chewie told him firmly. Ben rolled his eyes.

"You need two pilots for the Falcon," he reminded the Wookiee.

 _"_ _I can manage just fine on my own,"_ Chewie roared at him.

"Better with a co-pilot," Ben pressed.

 _"_ _You are not sitting in his seat!"_ the Wookiee told him with finality.

"Then…"

_"_ _I am not sitting in his seat either. It's his seat."_

"You're being ridiculous," Ben groaned.

 _"_ _You killed him!"_ Chewie snarled. _"He wanted to bring you home-to Leia. He still loved you. And you murdered him in cold blood."_

"I know."

_"_ _He was my brother. Wookiee honour demands I kill you."_

"Join the line," Ben retorted. "Pretty much everyone else in the Galaxy is ahead of you. And I recall you had a good shot at it on Starkiller Base."

_"_ _He was my best friend!"_

"And he was a lousy father," Ben replied, his anger flaring for a moment. "Yeah, I know he was a great partner and smuggler and general scoundrel and sometime hero of the Rebellion but as a father, he was intermittent when I was very small-then he was arguing with Mom much of the time while he vanished more and more frequently. Until they decided they were scared by my potential and sent me away to Luke. And then he vanished completely."

Chewie roared in fury-and cuffed him hard. Still rigid with anger and unbalanced, he found himself on his knees again, his head ringing and teeth gritted against the blow. He looked up and forced himself to squash the anger down, looking up blearily at the Wookiee.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. "I know he was your friend. I did miss him when he was away...especially with Mom more and more busy with the Senate and the New Republic. But given the choice between doing what he loved or caring a damn about his only child...well, he chose you over me every single time."

There was a sudden silence and the Wookiee looked down at the bowed shape. There enough raw emotion in the voice to give him pause, to remind him of the black-haired child who had been scant regarded as his stubborn and wilful parents fought for their own interests, their own paths without once considering what their son would imagine or need from them. And the words reminded Chewie of why Ben Solo had become Kylo Ren, why the lure of revenge and power was so attractive to a boy who felt he was rejected and cast aside by everyone who should have loved him...including his father's best friend.

Ben stiffened as Chewie's hand grasped his arm and helped him up but the Wookiee's expression was as close to contrite as he could manage. His growls were soft but eloquent.

"I know," Ben murmured. "And thanks."

 _"_ _But I'm still not allowing you to fly,"_ Chewie finished.

There was an awkward pause, punctuated only by the sound of switches being flipped and the ignition of engines. Then there was a horrible grinding noise.

"Finn!" Ben realised and staggered forward again, reaching the cockpit door. "You don't know how to fly and you've just activated the hyperspace compressor while failing to align the sublight engines." There was another grinding noise which had him and Chewie both wincing almost in unison. "And everyone on the entire base will have heard that!" Chewie pushed past and squeezed himself into the copilot's chair, reaching across Finn to flip a dozen switches and grumbling in Wookiee.

"What's he saying?" Finn asked. Ben paused.

"I can't really translate," he admitted.

"I would have thought you understood him from how you were talking to him a few minutes ago…"

"No, I do understand him-but most of what he's saying is cursing at how you've messed up the power flow and definitely attracted unwanted attention," Ben explained. "We'll be lucky if…"

A flurry of beeps had him looking round and the familiar orange and white shape of the BB droid, BB8, came barrelling towards him. The noises sounded incredibly annoyed and the device slammed into his leg at full speed before bouncing off. He yelped and hopped away as the droid rolled forward again. This time, the little droid opened a small hatch and a welding torch spat a fierce flame straight at him, licking across the side of his knee.

"OW!" he yelped, backing away and slapping out the flames that were greedily licking his pants leg. "What the…?"

"BB8? What is it…?" The voice of Poe Dameron approached as he rounded the corner to see his droid attacking the fugitive. Instantly, his blaster was in his hand. "YOU! I knew we couldn't trust you!"

"Mutual," Ben snapped, still slapping his burnt leg. BB8 furiously slammed into his leg again before pulling out a circuit board probe and stabbing it into his leg. "OW! Will you stop this crazy droid attacking me!"

"Good boy, BB8!" Poe said obviously as BB8 rolled forward and jabbed Ben with another attachment, lancing a powerful current through his leg. He yelped again. "Now we're going back to your cell and this time, we're going to have you shackled, chained and doped to the eyeballs…" Shaking his head, Ben sighed.

"Until the firing squad arrives," he reminded the General. "I doubt they'll even bother with a trial…"

And then the whole ship lurched and both men were thrown to the floor as the Millennium Falcon roared up into the sky. Chewie grumbled and flipped up a switch, closing the main hatch as the blue sky around them darkened and the millions of points of light of the stars suddenly surrounded them.

"I KNEW IT!" Poe yelled. "I knew it. You've forced them to help you and…"

"Poe!" Finn called from the cockpit as the Falcon levelled out. "It's okay. I chose to help him…"

"What?" The former pilot looked up and glared at Ben who was picking himself up again.

"Maybe I should just stay down here," he muttered as Poe glared at the cockpit. "It would save time." Finn craned his neck to see his friend waggle his fingers.

"Are you sure? He could have done the Force mind thing like Rey did with those stormtroopers…"

"No-because he wouldn't have recalled me talking to him, trying to appeal to his better nature," Ben grumbled.

"SHUT UP!" Poe yelled and hit him over the head with his blaster. Ben folded as Finn's eyes widened.

"Why did you do that?" he asked.

"He's an escaped prisoner!" Poe told him. "It was discovered just when I came to see what was happening with the Falcon. I wondered if the two were connected-and I couldn't see where you were. Alarm klaxons were starting to go off. Everyone on the base will be looking for him."

"Pretty much everyone on the Base wants to kill him!" Finn pointed out. Chewie gave a long moan. "What?" BB8 gave a series of beeps.

"He says there are multiple launches from the Base," Poe translated.

"The droid speaks Wookiee? Of course the droid speaks Wookiee! Am I the only person who doesn't speak Wookiee?" Finn grumbled.

"Look, buddy-we have gotta go back," Poe said, holstering his blaster. He gestured to the unconscious shape of Kylo Ren. "You know we have to take him back." Slowly, Finn shook his head.

"Look-he says there is something wrong with Rey," he revealed, as Poe walked into the cockpit. "I checked with Rose: her body has gone. Vanished completely. Just as he said. And I can feel that there is something not right. I know he's telling the truth."

"That would be the first time," Poe commented. Chewie made a couple of yipping noises. BB8 whistled obediently.

"What?" Finn's voice was frustrated.

"He says that Kylo Ren-Ben Solo-is very truthful," Poe told him and frowned. "But the First Order lied and deceived and…" Chewie growled. "Okay-I was just saying." A beeping sounded. "And those Resistance ships are closing. We really should turn back…"

"Look-if there is any way we can help Rey, if she's in trouble, we have to do it!" Finn's voice was passionate. "You know she would do the same for all of us." BB8 gave a little whistle and then a pair of sad beeps.

"Okay, buddy-but only because you asked," Poe conceded. "So where are we heading?" Finn glanced to Chewie, who hit the lever and threw them into hyperspace.

"Dathomir."

-o0o-

_I saw your potential. A New Vader. Now...I fear I was mistaken._

_You have too much of your father's heart in you, young Solo._

_You are no Vader, just a child in a mask!_

Eyes snapping open, Ben sat bolt upright, Snoke's scornful words ringing around his memory as the echoes of the nightmare still shuddered through him. He blinked and forced the images down: the former Supreme Leader had been a ruthless Master, demanding perfection from his student and ruthlessly castigating any failure or perceived weakness. And he had completely failed Snoke's standards after he had slain Han Solo. The patricidal act had wounded his soul, weakening him when it should have made him stronger, confused him when he should have become more certain and the judgement in his scornful words had been shameful, humiliating and agonising after all the sacrifices he had made to become the creature Snoke wanted.

He leaned forward, breathing hard and briefly covering his face with his hands as he tried to reorientate himself. He ran his fingers through his hair as his eyes scanned the surroundings. Someone had placed him on a bed in a cabin which he recognised as being on the _Millennium Falcon_ and a shiver of relief passed through him. At least he wasn't back in the hands of the Resistance-yet-though Poe had been on the ship… He raised his hand to the lump on the back of his head where the General had hit him and grimaced.

"Ow," he muttered to himself and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. Automatically, he reached for the Force and found the way blocked once more. Grimacing, he stumbled up and checked the door.

It opened immediately and he frowned before deciding to run with it. They could have locked him up if they had wanted but Chewbacca was probably a better deterrent and in any case, they were going where he wanted. What he really needed was access to some of the ancient Jedi texts but Rey would have been the only person who would have possessed those and if anywhere, they were back on the Base. Maybe meditating would enable him to access memories, to dredge up a fragment of information he had heard or read at some time in the years since he started his training. But first...he needed something to drink, some food and about three shots of painkiller for his various bruises.

"Ren!"

He looked up to realise he had wandered into the communal area, with the three humanoids all sitting around the Chess Table. Chewie gave a challenging growl and moved a piece forward. Finn rolled his eyes.

"How come he wins every time?" he asked. "I looked up the rules of this game and that move...doesn't appear anywhere." Chewie gave a low howl. "Of course I'm not accusing you of cheating but it's just...your style of play is unique…"

"Very unique," Poe agreed.

"He cheats," Ben commented as he slumped down into a seat close by. Chewie gave him an unfriendly glare. "Dad was convinced-and he did catch you reprogramming the game once…" The other two men stared at him.

"WHAT?" Finn exclaimed, outraged. Chewie growled at him. "Hey…"

"Where are we headed?" Ben asked, still absently rubbing the back of his head. "And why did you hit me?"

"Finn is convinced that you are trying to help Rey and that we should at least try," Poe conceded, blanking the second question. "She helped all of us. She defeated Palpatine. And if there is a chance that she could come back-or needs our help, we have to try." Then he sat back. "And honestly, though we've defeated the Final Order and we're both Generals, I can't see life being anywhere near as exciting as it has been. It's already all meetings and trying to keep the peace…"

"I could go for a little unexciting," Finn put in as Chewie made another move and crushed his piece. "Hey!" Chewie loomed at him. "I mean-good move. Fair. Very fair."

"Generals aren't exactly my favourite people," Ben commented. His eyes flicked up to meet matching glares. "Present company excepted."

"Well none of us are fans of murderous First Order Supreme Leaders but we all got our little problems!" Poe shot back.

Angry beeps started sounding and the whole ship shuddered...then spun sideways, dumping everyone on the floor. BB8 gave a frantic stream of beeps and whistles as a conduit blew out and the whole ship shuddered once more and then dropped out of hyperspace.

"What's going on?" Finn asked as everyone dashed for the cockpit. Without hesitating, Ben slid into the pilot's seat, eyes flicking over the displays.

"The main hyperspace energy transfer system relay has blown," he said, expertly flipping a couple of switches. Absolutely nothing happened. "Someone messing around with the energy flow has overloaded the system." Finn rolled his eyes as Chewie squeezed into the co-pilot chair and slapped Ben's hands off the console. He roared angrily. "Yes, I know this is Dad's chair but I can't help from back there. And you are being ridiculous!"

"You mean we're stranded," Poe said.


	6. Six

**Six:**

Alendo Tai was like a thousand space ports-grimy, dangerous and mostly lawless with only small pockets of civilisation. There were a couple of bosses who ran local rackets and a selection of bounty hunters, smugglers and general low level criminals mixed in with the rest of the population who were just trying to get by. Somewhere, you could buy most supplies or barter for what you needed-provided no one killed you before then.

The _Millennium Falcon_ limped into the port and settled down as far away from the commercial centre as she could, trying to attract no attention. Fortunately, there were a score of beat-up freighters of all shapes and sizes docked so no one spared her a second glance as she settled creakily. It was only when she landed that a cloud of acrid smoke billowed from the exhaust and merged with the drizzle that kept the port clammy and miserable. The sky was overcast with grey, green and purple clouds that blocked the sun and reddish lamps burned hesitantly in all the arches and in the covered walkways that meandered between stone and metal depots, the cramped shops and plentiful cantinas.

Three cloaked shapes emerged from the _Falcon_ into the gloomy afternoon, heading straight from the ship though Finn was carrying a pad with the precise components they required. Poe was carrying a blaster and watching Ben carefully, his eyes still suspicious. Chewie had known which spares they would need and most seemed pretty standard-except for a specific VR-1W97 power flow transformer that had burnt out beyond repair and was going to be a challenge to locate. What had also been a challenge was where they would leave the fugitive while they went out on the mission with everyone having a different opinion. Poe was all for hitting him over the head or drugging him to insensibility and leaving him locked up and shackled in a smuggling compartment while Finn had wanted to leave him locked in the cabin. Chewie wasn't that happy at having him on the ship at all because it meant the Wookiee would have to act as jailer as well as engineer so after a lot of argument, they had decided it was safer to take Ben with them.

The generally inhospitable climate meant most people tended to wear warm clothing-and hooded cloaks were the best option and reportedly the most popular. At least the _Falcon_ was well equipped with a wide variety of protective clothing in various sizes so all three men were swiftly kitted out in the all-encompassing cloaks. However, Poe shook his head as they headed for the nearest walkway to the centre of the port, glancing back at the familiar saucer shape of the ship.

"This isn't going to work," he realised. Finn sighed.

"Now what?" he asked.

"Ren," Poe hissed. Finn gazed at the tall man, walking quietly concealed under the hood and cloak.

"Yeah?"

"This isn't a disguise. All it does is make him look like...Kylo Ren!" he hissed.

"And how many people have seen him in action?" Finn asked, his mind sliding back to his first encounter with the man on his only deployment as a stormtrooper on Jakku before his defection.

"More than you would think," Ben murmured. "They tended to keep me busy. I got around. Though to be fair, I always wore my mask-except occasionally on the _Finalizer_. Pretty much everyone who saw Kylo Ren in battle is dead anyway. Almost no one would recognise my face."

"And the fact that you look exactly like him but without a mask isn't going to fool anyone!" Finn retorted.

"Well, at least could you stop striding around and looming," Poe hissed at him. Ben stopped.

"I don't loom," he protested.

"Uh...yes, you do," Finn told him, his tone almost apologetic. "Everything about you screams LOOMING and MENACING. Can't you be a bit...smaller? Or less...intimidating?" Ben turned to look at him, his brow furrowed..

"And how am I supposed to do that?" he asked, mind treacherously sliding back to the persona he had adopted in becoming Kylo Ren. His new identity had been Snoke's apprentice, the Supreme Leader's enforcer and he had needed to exude power and menace. And he was angry, roiling with hatred and pain and he had liberally spread those around. His rage had boiled over more times than he could count and every instance spread through the Stormtrooper corps like wildfire, enhancing his legend further, so he had no impetus to change. He was used to eyes turning to him when he walked into a room or onto a battlefield and those eyes were always filled with fear. And none of that would help right now when he was trying to leave the past behind and sneak into this Force-forsaken backwater.

"You could hunch," Poe suggested. "And maybe shuffle a bit."

"Oh kriffing hell," Ben murmured and tried to hunch a bit. "Better?"

"No," Finn said honestly. "That just looks weird. Just...try to keep behind us." Shaking his head, Ben followed the pair as they started down a narrow covered walkway, rather like a small tunnel. The roof was only a couple of inches above his head and he had to duck to avoid hitting his head on a few dangling lights and uneven stones in the arched roof. There was the constant drip of water and the echo of the feet. There were also scrittering noises coming from the other ways at intersections and unconsciously, he tried to stretch out with the Force...but there was nothing there-except a brutal stab of pain behind the eyes as he met the chemical barrier of the suppressing drugs. Briefly, he wondered how long the effects would last before they wore off-but he would find out and already knew that neither of his companions was likely to offer such information. And he was feeling distinctly uncomfortable, unarmed and in an unfamiliar port without anyone he could trust.

"I'd feel better with a weapon," he commented.

"And I feel better with you not having one," Poe shot back and stalked off. Trying not to wince at the tone, Ben turned to Finn.

"Is he ever going to get over what happened?" he asked the former stormtrooper. Finn shrugged.

"Maybe in a hundred years, he may consider forgiving you a bit for torturing him," Finn revealed. "Maybe. Possibly. Slightly. Though if you help us get out of this mess, it wouldn't harm your cause."

"This is going to be a long day," Ben murmured as they vanished down a wider passageway. Immediately, an insectoid head popped out from behind a narrow door that none of them had even noticed. The creature absently rubbed its iridescent antennae and compound eyes reflected the three receding shapes. Then it lifted a small com and chittered over the link. A human voice responded.

"Interesting. We'll watch out, Ch'il. Umto out."

-o0o-

Poe Dameron was in his element. Deliberately obscure about his past when he had joined the Resistance, his life before had been a patchwork of low level criminality, smuggling and bad and outrageous choices that he had navigated through with fearlessness, fast talking and a lot of luck and skill. He had never been to Alendo Tai but it was the same as a thousand other miserable ports and in many ways, it was like being at home.

Finn was a good friend and had been at his side through a number of adventures-including the last battles of the War against the First Order. The former stormtrooper had proven himself to be a good companion, a man who wasn't afraid to do what was right and necessary but who still showed an endearing naivete and wonder at the things he had never gotten to experience as a stolen-child-conscript-turned-stormtrooper. Poe knew he could count on Finn through thick and thin-but he couldn't understand why his friend was helping Kylo Ren. To Poe's mind, the prisoner had found a way to subvert his friend's grief and guilt over Rey's death and was just waiting for an opportunity to betray them for his own ends. Finn and Rey were-had been-very close and the pilot knew he would have to be the voice of reason and watch over their companion for the inevitable betrayal.

It hadn't taken long to find some salvage shops and he had thrown himself into bartering for the components they needed with gusto while the others waited outside, keeping watch. Alendo Tai was remote but even here, news of the fall of the First Order had trickled through...though to the inhabitants, it had made precisely no difference to everyday life...except perhaps no more stormtroopers patrolling the town. Offering a broad grin, Poe had shaken the shopkeeper's tentacle and handed over the required credits before pocketing the relay and heading for the door. Just as he was on the threshold, he paused and peered back into the dark and crowded space.

"I don't suppose you know who would have a VR-1W97?" he asked almost casually. "I need a spare for a run I'm planning and don't wanna leave without one." He gave a slight chuckle. "I mean, what idiot doesn't keep a back-up for such a critical component?" The shopkeeper gave a loud honking noise-his version of a laugh.

"The only one who would keep such an obsolete component is Oo'o'lo," he growled, his four bug eyes swivelling with consideration. "He services the junk market."

"Junk?" Poe replied in mock outrage. "My ship made the Kessel Run in twelve parsecs." The scornful snort told him his listener was unconvinced. "But thanks for the head's up." Then he flipped up his hood and stalked out, walking straight past the others and heading straight for the nearest cantina. They shared a look and then followed him.

"Hey-wait up!" Finn protested as he caught up at the door. Poe shook his head and stalked on, arriving at the bar and sliding into a vacant seat. Shoving his hood back, he gestured to the barkeep as the others managed to find spaces at the bar. "Poe. What's wrong?" Grasping the drink, the former pilot took a large slug of the greenish liquid.

"Oo'o'lo," he murmured, his eyes unfocussing. "It would have to be Oo'o'lo." Finn waved at the barman.

"Who's Oo'o'lo?" he asked as the barman pushed glasses of the same beverage in front of him and Ben. Poe shrugged.

"An old buddy from my days before the Resistance," the pilot revealed.

"When you were a smuggler?" Finn hissed. Poe nodded. "And when you say 'buddy', you don't mean buddy, do you? Not like you and me buddy…" Ben inclined his head and listened, though he was also trying to maintain awareness of the people milling around him. With his connection to the Force blunted, he found the ability to track and assess enemies in this crowded environment gone. He looked to his other side and saw eyes on his shape. Carefully, he grasped the container and took a small sip of the acrid liquid, managing not to gag.

"Not exactly," Poe admitted. "He stiffed me for a load of Gathelian Purgols."

"What?" Finn looked confused.

"Little fluffy creatures that are considered delicacies in some of the more indulgent systems," Ben murmured. "They are also hallucinogenic, addictive and illegal."

"Guess the First Order didn't approve of anyone having fun," Finn commented.

"If your idea of fun is imagining your flesh is melting and borers are burrowing through your brain, knock yourself out," Ben replied, glancing to his left once more. "But dealers tend to also sell weapons to undesirables…"

"Otherwise known as us," Poe grumbled.

"...and generally undermine the rule of law. Which the First Order really didn't tolerate," Ben murmured. He frowned. "Does Oo'o'lo bear you a grudge?"

"Not that I'm aware," Poe admitted. "I may have kept some merchandise to cover my losses but I'm sure he would barely even register such a small amount…"

"You stole from this guy?" Finn hissed. "You actually stole from some dangerous smuggler boss?"

"You wanna say it louder so everyone can hear?" Poe shot back. "Yeah. And now he's the only one who has the part we need…"

"Of course he does," Finn grumbled rolling his eyes. And then he glanced at Ben, who was tracking three bulky pig-like humanoids that seemed to be having a heated discussion while glancing frequently in their direction. "So is this going to be a problem?"

"I'm sure he won't bear us a grudge-not when we can pay handsomely for the part from Resistance funds," Poe decided.

"What _us_? _We_ didn't steal from him! _You_ did!" Finn reminded him as Ben rose, grabbing their shoulders and wrenching them from their seats. Both had no chance to protest as he steered them directly to the door, using them as a ram to push through the milling patrons. "Hey!"

"We're going," the former Supreme Leader told him bluntly. "I don't need the Force to tell me that situation is going to turn ugly in less time than you can imagine."

"What do you mean?" Poe protested as they burst out the doors into a small street in front of the cantina. There was no roof here so the cobbles were slick with drizzle, a few drab brown awnings covering baskets of wares: food, weird breads and dried roots and meats that Finn didn't even like to consider the origin of. Ben narrowed his eyes as he glared at the pilot-turned-general after he released his bruising grips on them.

"Kylo Ren would have his lightsaber out and would already have killed the three aliens who were planning to attack us," he hissed. "But Ben Solo doesn't have a saber-or even a gun-and he can't sense where their friends are. Because they will have friends…" The doors behind them burst open and the three porcine aliens emerged with a roar, caught sight of them and charged-just as four more of the same species wearing similar uniforms swung round a corner and spread out.

"There they are," Finn noted grimly, reaching for his gun. Immediately, the whine of blaster fire filled the space, echoing off the stone walls as the various combatants dived for cover. Hunkering down behind a basket of roots and gourds, the defenders snapped off shots as the aliens chose their spots. "Exactly how much did you steal from this guy Oo'o'lo?" Finn yelled. Poe glanced at him.

"Approximately the entire load," he confessed as a blaster exploded by his head.

"The whole load?" Finn repeated, taking down another alien. The thing shrieked as it died, green blood, seeping under the box of cooking implements. Another six aliens surged into the little street and took up stations. "I hate to say this-but we could really use Kylo Ren right about now…"

Frustration and anger welled up in Ben's chest, skewing his vision with red. The words had just underlined his feelings of helplessness, uselessness and incipient failure. Since he had hauled himself out of that pit, his entire existence had turned to a nightmare of failure, tossed from pillar to post at the will of everyone else. His fists creaked as he balled them, his shape rigid with fury. It would be so easy to slide back, to become the creature he had been, all rage and fury and hatred and cruelty...but Rey was convinced that he was better than that. He focussed, forcing the emotions away. His saber was at the bottom of the sea on Kef Bir but he had been trained as a warrior, trained to use whatever was available to defeat the enemy...trained to kill. He broke.

Leaping forward, he snatched a pole used to hold up one of the awnings and flung himself on the nearest pair of aliens. A blaster bolt whiffled past his face and he twisted, the pole being swung like a staff and crashing across the alien's face. He landed, used his weight to batter the alien down while snatching his gun and blasting his partner without hesitation. Then he hunkered down, shooting the groaning alien for good measure before glancing around the battlefield and seeing a trio pinning Poe and Finn down. Without hesitating, he snapped off a couple of shots, taking down two. Then he glanced around.

He was right by another of the covered walkways and if he wanted, he could dive through and make a break for it, abandoning them. He knew he would be able to find a ship and once his connection with the Force was restored, he could take command and head out on his quest without any further fear of being tied up or drugged. Without having to justify every breath he took to people who almost certainly would never forgive him.

But the two men were Rey's friends, people who meant a great deal to her-that much he had felt through their Bond-and betraying then would be a betrayal of her. And he was done with failing people, with every time confirming what Snoke had made him believe for years and wasted years. So he raised his blaster and shot away the awning over the nearest trio of aliens, watching it flap down over them and blind them. Poe and Finn were blasting away as his head snapped round at the staccato sound of steps. He lurched sideways to lunge into the nearest doorway…

...and came face to face with a patrol of stormtroopers.


	7. Seven

**Seven:**

Stormtroopers!

Of course, he shouldn't be shocked that not every ship in the First Order was on Exegol and that not every stormtrooper had handed in his gun. It hadn't happened at the fall of the Empire-hence the existence of the First Order-and he guessed the Resistance and whatever administration they set up would be dealing with the outliers and die-hards for years. But for now, there was a small portion of Ben Solo that was thankful they had improbably appeared because he could definitely use it to his advantage. He skidded to a halt as the front four levelled their blasters at him before he straightened up, assuming his full height and reassembling his most sneering and cold expression. Pretty much everyone in the First Order knew who he was-and if these individuals were actually still First Order, then this might just work.

"Drop the weapon!" the leader clipped, his voice electronically altered. Ben glared at him as he lowered the blaster.

"About time," he growled."Assume control of the area, Section Leader. I want the two humanoids captured. Alive. They have information I need."

There was a pause and the Stormtrooper nodded, obviously inspecting his tall shape, swathed in the cloak and his gaze seeming to linger on his face. For a few microseconds, Ben was thankful his first broadcasts as Supreme Leader had been with his naked face-before he rebuilt his helmet.

"Yes, Supreme Leader," he said and gestured to his men. "You three-take the left. We'll pacify the right." And then they erupted into the street and the sounds of blaster fire intensified. There were yells and squeals and thuds and even a few explosions. Then there was silence. And then tramping feet, inexorably growing closer. Ben turned back to see Finn and Poe being shoved along, their hands in binders and sharing looks that definitely confirmed that they believed he had betrayed them and gone back on everything he had said to them. Unsurprised, he looked remotely at them as they were dragged in front of him. Finn's gaze was especially scathing.

"I believed you," he ground out through his teeth. "I thought Rey had reached you."

_She did._

"You should have listened to your friend," Ben said coldly, not answering.

"Yeah-I told you a leopard doesn't change its spots," Poe snarked. A stormtrooper grabbed his arm and jammed his blaster in Poe's neck but Ben shook his head slightly.

"We can discuss this back on your ship," he said, not looking at the stormtrooper. "In detail. First, I have a mission for you." He glanced at the prisoners. "Take them to your shuttle. I have a task for your men, Section Leader. I require some specific items from the markets…"

Glaring at the tall shape, Finn felt the bottom drop from his stomach. He had found himself wanting to believe Kylo Ren, wanting to clutch the hope that Rey could be alive somewhere, that there was a way to bring her back and stop the victory feeling like half a defeat. He knew he should be glad the First Order were defeated-but it really didn't feel like it now, with them prisoners of stormtroopers and on their way to a First Order spacecraft. And along with that thought was another, graver concern: how many more were there out there?

-o0o-

Chewbacca was starting to get worried. He had managed to repurpose some other components to repair what he could but BB8 was driving the Wookiee crazy. Poe had ordered the little droid to remain behind but BB8 was rolling around, beeping and trilling until Chewie had roared at him to get out there and check his friends were okay, if he was that worried. That, at least, had delivered the peace the Wookiee craved so he could finally finish mending the conduits Finn had messed up with his incompetent efforts at piloting the incredibly temperamental _Falcon_ so they were ready for the last few parts.

Chewie had seen the stormtroopers as well and he was getting a very bad feeling about them…

-o0o-

Rey was hanging off a cliff slick with ice, purple lightning rending the skies overhead. Her fingers were frozen and she barely had any grip on the ledge she was standing on The nearest handhold was almost too far to reach and she was in real danger of falling.

"Danger there is but of falling it is not," Yoda said, floating up past her.

"Easy enough for you to say," Rey muttered, throwing herself across the gap and digging her fingers in.

"Not really," Yoda conceded. Irritated, she looked up.

"Why am I doing this?" she asked. Luke glanced down at her.

"You seek to reach the living once more," he reminded her. "And something has blocked your Bond to Kylo Ren."

"Ben," Rey insisted, her eyes burning with tears. She had felt him, there on Exegol. In the heat of battle, as she was faced with the impossible choice, the inevitable sacrifice that would doom her to becoming the monster she had seen on the ruins of the Death Star, she had reached out-and he was there. Warm, alive...and light. But losing...so she had offered him help through the Bond, offered him salvation-and he had taken the lightsaber from her hand, their skin brushing so slightly but more than enough to send electricity up her arm. And then he had run to her side as they faced the real evil together.

She had seen him, heard him...but she couldn't feel him. Not any more. She knew he was alive. And he was a trained Force user-was he a Jedi now he was good or did he defy definitions of Sith and Jedi, given his path? All she knew was that he was alive and he should be able to see her, be able to speak with her as she had with Luke. But he couldn't. Something was wrong...and she needed to speak with him once more, to know that her certainty had been worthwhile. That her friends were well and that the evil was gone. Maybe then, she could rest…

Scarlet lightning rent the sky and the rock under her fingers crumbled. With a piercing scream, she plummeted and vanished amid the flashing clouds.

-o0o-

"I knew we should have chained him up and locked him in the smuggling compartments," Poe growled, sitting uncomfortably, shackled to the chair as Finn observed the troopers who were standing guard over them as the shuttle prepared for departure .

"Chewie refused," Finn reminded them. In deciding what was happening, the big Wookiee had finally taken a casting vote and insisted that Ren wasn't left on the Falcon. There had been a brief look in Ren's dark eyes that had almost been hurt but he had said nothing, accepting their judgement. To Poe's mind, it was now clear that he had already been plotting his own revenge and finding the stormtroopers had just made it a whole lot easier. "Now we know why."

"I should have shot him when I first came into that cell," Poe grumbled.

"Shooting a helpless man chained to a bed and drugged," Finn mused. "Yeah, that really makes us better than the First Order."

"Instead, the First Order have us two as prisoners-and no one knows they still exist," Poe pointed out. "We need to get word to the Base that they are here and their numbers."

"Or destroy them," Finn suggested.

"And how do we do that?" Poe asked him. "No Starkiller type weapons to blow up. No bombers. No cruisers to smash into them…" Something beeped. "Yes, except the Falcon…" Then he started. "BB8?" he breathed, deliberately not moving a muscle to look down at the droid as he would usually do.

Beebee-8 gave a happy beep and ducked back behind Poe and Finn as the troopers shifted from foot to foot, bored and staring stolidly forward. None of them reacted to the sound of the droid. Why would they? If there was a droid in the shuttle, it was meant to be there, right? But the former pilot felt a tug and as he lowered his wrists to his lap, a fine probe snaked over his leg and began to pick the binders. Finn leaned close to try to shield the action from the troopers, casting his friend a worried glance...before there was a clang and the doors closed. Instantly, the shuttle began to rise straight up into the grey and drizzly sky. The troopers visibly relaxed.

"Not long until we're back on board," one murmured, just audible.

"I hate this port," another murmured. "Mud eating scum. We lost two more from Red Section yesterday."

"Bloody smugglers and slavers," a third commented. "We should just blast the planet to make an example."

"At least the Captain has a plan," the first muttered. "At least he _did_. Can't see him overjoyed about this latest development." And then the troopers turned back to the two prisoners. "He'll want to know what these two have on the Resistance." Finn and Poe shared a look.

"Um-we don't know anything," Finn suggested as the troopers stared at them.

"Can we go now?" Poe added.

"Supreme Leader Ren says you do-so we're under orders to deliver you to the interrogators," the first stormtrooper told them emotionlessly.

"I knew I should have shot him," Poe muttered. Finn nodded.

"Twice," he agreed.

-o0o-

Ben had pulled his hood up and his cloak around his aching body and parked himself in the back corner of the shuttle, the shadows concealing his face. The leader of the stormtroopers handed a squat item over and he grasped it carefully, then squirreled it away. Silent and glowering, he noted the stormtroopers all positioned themselves as far away from him as they could which was a small relief. He braced himself as the shuttle juddered and took off, arching up into the tempestuous sky. Shuddering through turbulence, they finally broke the cloud cover and accelerated into the inky blackness, heading towards the unmistakable shape of a First Order vessel. And then he felt his body tense.

He knew that ship. Battered and repaired but still impressive, the Resurgent Class Star Destroyer blotted out a swathe of the brilliant unwinking stars overhead as the shuttle sped home. Taking a deep breath, Ben closed his eyes and tried to reach out and access the Force-but whatever the Resistance had given him was still blocking his access. Resisting the temptation to give any outward sign, he remained still as the shuttle sped through the force field and landed neatly by its fellow in landing bay 12. As soon as they touched down, the doors opened and ramp extended. Ben turned-to meet, as expected, a welcoming party.

The Captain in his dark khaki-grey uniform nodded a curt greeting.

"Welcome to _the Finalizer_ , Supreme Leader," he said. Walking forward briskly, Ben nodded, inspecting the cool, neat shape of Captain Edrison Peavey. The man was a consummate professional, a man who had served in the old Empire and who Ren had known held the late and distinctly unlamented General Hux in utter contempt. He recalled the Peavey had been carefully guarded around him and he wished for the thousandth time he had his access to the Force, because he guessed he would need to gauge the man's mind carefully. Peavey would know the First Order had fallen, that the leadership was gone and would be operating independently. A member of the older generation of senior officers, Peavey had been quietly suspicious of Snoke and Ren, sceptical of Force sorcery and unnatural powers that were as capricious and cruel as the men who had wielded them. Not that Kylo Ren had done anything to ingratiate himself to the regular officers, for his status was somewhat aside from the normal command structure, though he had expected immediate obedience from any of them when he required it. And now, stripped of the structures of the First Order and his own powers, 'Kylo Ren' had to hope that Peavey still assumed he was the man he had been and would grant him the obedience and deference due to that status.

"I require quarters and once I have freshened up, I wish to interrogate the prisoners," Ben said icily.

"No need," Peavey told him calmly. "My interrogators have already started." Inwardly groaning, Ben lurched forward, his eyes glaring furiously as he invaded the Captain's personal space.

"Are you deaf, Captain?" he asked.

"I think the answer to that is obvious, Supreme Leader," he replied pleasantly.

"Stupid?"

"I think not, sir," the Captain replied.

"Insubordinate?" At that, the Captain bridled, his eyes flashing with anger.

"I am a loyal officer!" he proclaimed.

 _But to who?_ Ben thought. "Then you will have no difficulty hearing, understanding and obeying my orders, Captain. Withdraw your men. I want the prisoners unharmed because it facilitates my examinations if they are not already beaten semi-conscious. Is that clear?"

"As crystal, Supreme Leader," Captain Peavey said smoothly. "I will attend to it immediately. Lieutenant Faju-please conduct the Supreme Leader to the quarters I have arranged for him. Ensure his every need is catered for. Then have him conducted to the prisoners to begin their questioning." Turning away, Ben followed the short and lightly perspiring lieutenant who had been given the thankless task of being his minder. Fists clenched, he hoped he could carry this off and get them off _the Finalizer_ before Peavey uncovered the truth.

-o0o-

Finn and Poe were in interrogation chairs next to one another in a shiny and partially lit interrogation cell. Both were lightly bruised but just as the interrogators were getting started, a rather sheepish stormtrooper had come in and hastily handed over new orders, causing the interrogators to back off, muttering in annoyance.

Poe was furious, muttering a variety of painful and graphic revenges he was going to enact upon Kylo Ren when he got his hands on him while Finn was wracked with a combination of anger, guilt and betrayal at how easily he had been played and how ruthlessly they had been betrayed. He sighed. Somehow, he would get out and then they would ensure Ren didn't get away again. They had glimpsed BB8 scuttling away as they were taken off the shuttle and both men were hoping that the resourceful little droid would find a way to rescue them. But until then, they were at the mercy of the First Order.

"Poe?"

"Yes, Finn?"

"Are you still mad?"

"What makes you think that?"

"I didn't know that many cuss words."

Poe chuckled.

"Once I'm out of here, I'll be okay-provided BB8 can sneak through without getting caught," he murmured slowly then looked around. "Are prisoners usually put two to an interrogation cell?"

"Not normally," Finn confessed. "This is a Resurgent Class so it's literally bursting with cells and interrogation rooms. I hardly think they're so busy they have to double us up-unless they are planning to try to persuade one of us to talk while the other one…" He looked up. "Sorry. I really did believe him. I felt he was being honest." Poe shrugged.

"I kinda found myself wanting to believe it-because it meant there was some hope for Rey," he sighed. "I should have let BB8 continue setting him on fire."

The hiss of the door jerked them back to the present and two Stormtroopers marched in, followed by the familiar dark shape that had the pair scowling in hatred, eyes blazing with anger and betrayal. Kylo Ren was back in black, a modified black General's uniform wrapped around his tall frame, black gloves creaking as he balled his fists and his expression cold and remote. Locking his eyes on the prisoners, he spoke.

"Wait outside," he said. "I need no help to wring these two dry." The stormtroopers marched out without hesitation and the door hissed closed. Ben knew that the stormtroopers tended to withdraw halfway down the corridor because of the screams and hoped they recalled his reputation and did so this time.

"TRAITOR!" Poe threw at him. "Knew I should have shot you the moment I saw you were alive!"

"Rey would be ashamed!" Finn growled at him. "She always thought there was good in you. You have betrayed her memory!"

"He should have left you to die on Exegol!" Poe snapped.

"Yeah!" Finn agreed, glaring. Ben stared at them and extended his gloved hand, leaning towards them, his frame stiff as if he was concentrating hard.

"I have the part," he murmured. Poe blinked and stared at him.

"What?"

"Just kriffing play along!" Ben grunted through his teeth. "And writhe a bit." Finn's eyes widened in surprise.

"You…" he hissed. Maintaining his pose, Ben glanced at him.

"Would my being shot by the stormtroopers or the aliens have actually gained anything?" he asked in a low voice. "Apart from making you both feel better, of course. So I gambled they would recognise me. Why do you think you're both in here?"

"We know you have no power," Poe taunted him. "How's that gonna work for you?"

"When will the drug wear off?" Ben demanded, his eyes glittering coldly.

"Already should have done," Poe taunted him. "Except we gave you ten times the recommended dose. Maybe it won't ever come back…" Ben's fists clenched with a creak of leather and for a moment, he looked exactly like the man who had wielded the spitting red lightsaber with such lethal skill and brutality…

...and then, he took a deep breath and his hands relaxed, He locked his eyes on the men before him and stretched his hand out again, his brows furrowed and eyes dark against his pale skin.

"Then we may never get out of here," he said grimly. "And I will never be able to reach Rey."

-o0o-

_A/N: Couldn't resist bringing back Captain Peavey. Ade Edmondson was just perfect._


	8. Eight

**Eight.**

It was cold. Suddenly, she was alone, surrounded by tendrils of clammy fog, sounds muffled and everything contracted to the little pocket of gloom around her body. There was an unseen ground under her feet, uneven and slick as she slowly rotated to look around.

"Hello?" Her voice was muffled, sucked away by the fog. It intensified the feeling of isolation, of loneliness. "Master Luke? Master Yoda?"

Silence.

She frowned, peering into the fog and seeing nothing. So she chose a direction at random, one that felt right and started walking. But as she took her very first step, the voices began. Echoey representations of voices she knew and many she had never heard swirled around her, confusing the environment further.

_"_ _Rey."_

Her voice leapt at her in a hundred voices. Finn. Poe. Leia. Luke. Han. Ben. Snoke. Palpatine.

She stopped and looked ahead.

"Ben?" she murmured.

The voices silenced.

"I can hear you," she tried again. "Can you hear me?"

_"_ _Rey?"_

"I hear you," she said, relieved that she could finally hear his voice. "Are you alright?"

_"_ _Rey?"_

She walked forward, towards the sound of his voice, her brow lightly furrowed.

"Ben?"

She reached out for him, trying to catch the edge of their Bond, to feel the familiar mind once more...but there was just dark and cold and disappointment. She paused and balled her fists, closing her eyes and stretching out her mind once more.

"Ben? Are you there?" she whispered.

Abruptly, the grey fog grew pitch black and the temperature dropped to freezing. Rey's breath coalesced in freeing lungfuls, billowing around her face. Her eyes widened as a shadowy shape loomed towards her...not the familiar shape of Ben but…

"SNOKE!"

-o0o-

"Take them to the holding cells!"

The stormtroopers were taken by surprise as the door to the interrogation cell hissed open and the dark shape of Kylo Ren erupted through, already walking fast and not sparing a single glance for the men he was addressing.

"Yes, sir," one offered, not expecting an acknowledgement and receiving none. Looking at his fellow, the pair entered the cell once more to collect the prisoners for their transfer.

 _Force, I really was an ass._ Ben had to concentrate on keeping his expression looking pissed off-which was the closest he could approximate to the constant roiling rage, exasperation, pain and hatred that had pretty much been his entire mental state as Kylo Ren. He had been granted plenty of time during his imprisonment to analyse his previous behaviour-among other things-during his imprisonment on the Resistance Base and images had flashed through his memory, too numerous to ignore, of him treating others as nothing. And, he realised, to Kylo Ren, there were nothing. All his concentration and value had been invested in his personal quest to become even stronger in the Dark Side of the Force, to crush all weakness within himself-including any personal attachments. _But would it have killed me to acknowledge those men?_

_Kylo wouldn't have. So I can't._

He slowed slightly, evening out his pace from his usual angry stalk to a slower rate to allow himself to consider his next step. Finn and Poe had been suspicious and neither had played along with the 'interrogation' to any great degree, though he had assured them that he had located the missing parts for the Falcon. If anyone watched the tapes of the interrogation, they would see that he certainly hadn't reamed their memories using the Force and definitely hadn't reduced them to the slumped, trembling state his victims ended up in. He was sure that they would have been happy to see literally anyone else in the same circumstances but neither man trusted him and was prepared to listen to any explanation.

_They could have betrayed you to your enemies._

He stopped, the voice seductively echoing through his mind. He recognised it: Snoke, his former Master, the former Supreme Leader. But Snoke was dead-Kylo Ren had killed the creature himself, carving him in half using Anarkin's lightsaber and then offering his hand to Rey to be his co-ruler. She had rejected him-but now he understood there had been no way she could stand by him. He was a creature of evil and had disappointed her when she had hoped that he would join her in escaping to the Resistance and turning to the Light. It had been impossible then, for the time was not right and the man he had been was still too mired in darkness and hatred and the inexorable rightness of his vision. But the final irony was...that she had won. She did turn him-through persistence, through bravery and ultimately, through her compassion.

And then it hit him, a sudden surge of power that slammed him sideways against the wall. He staggered and steadied himself, a hand resting against the smooth metal of the corridor wall. His head snapped up.

"Rey?" he breathed.

Her voice floated through his mind, almost beyond perception but not quite.

 _"_ _Ben? Are you there?_ " she whispered.

"REY!" he shouted, battering at the walls in his mind that severed him from the Force. "REY!" His head snapped up and he felt a sudden surge of relief. He had heard her: just for a moment, just for an instant, but she had heard him as well.

Then he was up, striding forward towards the Bridge. He could remain as 'Kylo Ren' for a little longer to order Captain Peavey to supply him with the ship he needed to head to Dathomir and try to reach Rey. And he could leave Finn and Poe behind because they didn't trust him, because they would rather stun him than listen to his anguish at losing Rey and his complete determination to get her back...but he wasn't going to. He couldn't. These two men were Rey's friends, people she cared for deeply and he owed it to her to ensure they got away to safety. No matter how little they trusted him-or what he risked to achieve it.

Captain Edrison Peavey was standing staring at the planet below through the forward viewing port, his hands clasped behind his back in standard military form. The bridge was quiet, the officers working efficiently and occasionally announcing important information to the Captain. He always acknowledged with a nod of the head, his controlled face impassive. Below, the roiling grey and green and purple marble of Andaku, the world that hosted the port of Alendo Tai, glowed in the light of the greenish sun, flashes of lightning marking the upper clouds. A small rim skimmer emerged from the dense cloud layer and jumped straight to lightspeed before the hulking Resurgent Class Destroyer could scan its cargo bays. Nodding at the confirmation of another smuggler, Peavey turned to spy the tall saturnine shape of Kylo Ren.

"Supreme Commander," he greeted the man neutrally. Walking forward to stare at the planet, Ben took a couple of deep breaths.

"The Resistance fighters were helpful," he commented.

"Should I dispose of them now?" Peavey asked him dryly. Ben grimaced.

"I still have use for them," he said after a pause-as if considering. "I need them for a quest I am undertaking."

"Oh?" Peavey's voice was politely disinterested, his eyes inspecting the 'Supreme Commander' suspiciously. The older Generals had been covertly suspicious of Snoke and Ren, not trusting the sorcery of the Force over the familiar military assets of Star Destroyers, blasters and stormtroopers. All had acquiesced to his demands because Snoke had created the First Order and overseen the rise of their forces from a rumour to the ruling power in the Galaxy. "Are you certain that leaving at such a time is wise, sir?"

He stiffened, his lips pressing together in what could have been interpreted as anger. His eyes flashed.

"What time?" he growled.

"The Galaxy is in open rebellion, sir," Peavey pointed out. "Most of your Senior command are lost. Numerous vessels have been lost or taken down by Resistance attacks. The integrity of the First Order is wavering. You are the Supreme Leader and this ship is loyal." Curtly, Ben nodded.

"How many other vessels remain?" he asked. Peavey glanced over at the bridge crew.

"Is this the correct place for a briefing?" he asked.

"How many?" There was a creak of leather as Ben balled his fists.

"Seven other destroyers in various states of disrepair," Peavey reported. "At least two are only fit to be cannibalised for parts. The crews can be redistributed across the remaining fleet to bring numbers up to establishment and all materiel utilised to ensure the remaining five are at maximum efficiency."

Ben nodded curtly, his gaze still fixated on the planet below-though he was focussed on his reflection in the port, watching the movement of the staff behind him. There were stormtroopers on the bridge.

"The Resistance are still in a state of disarray," he said. "There were losses on all sides-though a hundred worlds sent reinforcements to the battle of Exegol." Peavey frowned.

"How did you escape, sir?" he asked directly. Ben forced his hands to relax.

"I was injured during the battle that finally slew Emperor Palpatine," he revealed slowly. "When I recovered, I was in the custody of the Resistance. It took me a few days to persuade one of them to help me escape. I was looking for remnants of the First Order." Peavey's glance lingered on him for a long moment.

"There was a rumour that your com dropped out some time before the battle and that you weren't on the Steadfast when she jumped for the Emperor's world," the Captain commented.

"I was intercepting the Scavenger girl," Ben said slowly. "Are you inferring something, Captain?" Peavey smiled slightly.

"Where is your lightsaber, Supreme Commander?" he asked.

Ben stiffened and his fists clenched tighter. The stormtroopers had closed to within a few yards.

"The First Order was formed from the ashes of the Empire to bring order back to the Galaxy-and was subverted by spoilt children and petulant adolescents," the Captain commented. "Supreme Leader Snoke allowed himself to be slain by the Scavenger Girl instead of killing her the moment she was brought aboard his ship. Hux was a fool, too enamoured of his technology and his machinations against you that he was unable to act as a proper military leader. You allow yourself to be distracted by arcane concerns such as killing the old Jedi, Skywalker, or chasing the probably-dead Palpatine rather than pressing the military advantage and pacifying rebellious heworlds."

Ben glanced over at the Captain and his face fell into a mask of anger. Peavey was smiling.

"Are you challenging my authority?" he growled. The Captain turned to fully face him.

"Whatever injuries you suffered, Ren, seem to have taken your powers," the Captain said. "Anyone speaking to you as I have just done would expect his throat crushed by your arcane sorcerer's powers. Or you would have wrecked half of my Bridge with your sorcerer's sword in one of your infantile temper tantrums. Yet I am here am unharmed and frankly unimpressed. And your 'interrogation' was less than stellar. So yes, I believe that you have betrayed the First Order by leading us to defeat and consorting with the Resistance." He gave the smallest smile. "You are relieved of duty, Kylo Ren."

The stormtroopers had fired their stunners before he could even turn and as he collapsed to the floor, the Captain turned back to the viewing port, uninterested, his hands clasped behind his back once more.

"Petulant children," he condemned.

-o0o-

"Anything?" Rose glared at the communications officer as he scanned his board and checked the log of recent communications.

"Nothing," the young man replied, looking unhappy. "I've tried all frequencies but there's no response from the Millennium Falcon." Shaking her head, Rose sighed.

"Keep trying," she said, her shoulders slumping. She was fond of Finn and Poe, though she had a little less to do with the latter except on a purely professional level. But Finn was one of her close friends, someone who she knew she could rely on. The fact that he and Poe had vanished when Kylo Ren escaped gave her serious cause for concern that somehow, the former Supreme Leader had mesmerised them and forced them to cooperate. Rose was very definite in her views that as the overall leader of the First Order, he should answer for his crimes and those of the Order. Too many had died for the Supreme Commander to pay with anything other than his life for the millions of deaths that had ensued in the conflict-include Paige.

The absence of the two Generals-their highest ranking officers and leaders-had caused deep alarm in the Resistance since the pair had vanished with the dangerous former leader of the First Order. There were mutterings that they should have hanged Ren or shot him as soon as he first arrived but Rose didn't agree: Finn and Poe had brought him back for a reason and whatever happened to Ren should have a transparent process. If it was just a summary execution, they would be no better than the First order-than Ren himself. She stared up at the blue sky and the invisible stars above and chewed her lip thoughtfully. They had a leadership group that had organically come together, the people who ran things and who always came to the fore in debates and discussions and those closest to Leia. Rose had been asked to be de facto leader until they returned, which she saw as motivation to get her friends back as soon as possible.

She folded her arms and sighed. Somewhere, Kylo Ren was out there with her friends, manipulating them to his own ends. The Resistance ships had failed to intercept the Falcon-not that she had expected them to, for the Millennium Falcon was astonishingly fast. For now, Poe and Finn were on their own and in danger because there was no chance that he wouldn't head back to the remnants of the First Order.

-o0o-

Finn and Poe stiffened when the door to their cell opened and two stormtroopers marched in, covering them with their blasters-before a large, black-clad shape was tossed in. Kylo Ren sprawled on the floor, barely conscious as the guards withdrew and the door locked. The two men stared at him.

"Why wasn't he this easy to capture when we were fighting him?" Finn asked ironically as Ben slid his hands under his chest and lifted his head, his eyes bleary.

"I was evil, I commanded the Force and I would have cut you in half with my lightsaber," he growled then closed his eyes and grimaced. Pushing his body off the floor, he felt in his cloak and finally fished out a squat white box with buttons on two sides. "Your VR-1W97." Finn stared at him.

"What?"

"You know, the part the Falcon needs since you broke it," Ben commented as he painfully got to his knees. He rubbed his head.

"So I guess he doesn't think you're Kylo Ren?" Poe asked him snarkily.

"No-he just doesn't care," Ben admitted, rubbing his forehead. "That and the fact that someone was completely unconvincing in the interrogation. Can't think who. And I didn't try to choke him." Finn stared.

"You do that a lot?" he asked incredulously. Ben shrugged.

"I didn't tolerate setbacks well," he admitted. "As Kylo Ren, I was furious and bitter the entire time. Abandoned by my parents, with a master who tries to kill me, alone and swathed in darkness...I had some anger management issues."

"Wait… wait…. Hold up. Snoke tried to kill you?" Poe asked and then his expression changed. "You know that really doesn't surprise me."

"Not Snoke…. Luke," Ben muttered. "Don't you know? He never told anyone? I thought it would be top resistance gossip."

"The first time I saw Luke Skywalker was on Crait!" Poe's brows shot up as he edged back slightly. "In fact, the only time I saw him. And he wasn't real chatty!"

"Luke Skywalker was a legend! A Legend!" Finn snapped. "He ended the Empire by stopping Vader and the Emperor!"

"It didn't make him a very good teacher though," Ben grumbled. "And a worse Uncle. Vader was the one that we thought had killed the Emperor just so you know." Finn sputtered in outrage at the implication.

"Much as I would love to join the club and try to kill you as well," Poe said dryly, "we have to find a way out of here. As you're here, I'm guessing the Captain will either try to interrogate us properly or just have us executed."

"Or both," Ben added grimly. "Peavey is an older Captain. Served in the Empire. And he hated Ren. They all did."

"Hey, we hate you as well," Poe told him. "Just so you don't feel left out."

"Not your kind of hate," Ben said. "It's the Vader-was-better-than-you-and-we-want-you-to-die-painfully kind of hate."

"Nope-he's got us beat," Finn put in. "All yours."

"And as we're at his mercy, he may get his wish," Ben continued, sitting back against the wall and resting his head back against the metal wall. "If I had my powers, I could do something but someone gave me ten times the dose of the drug…"

"Stop bitching," Poe said, inspecting the part. "All we need is to get off here, contact Chewie, get this into the Falcon and skip out of here."

"Last time you went Lightspeed skipping, the Millennium Falcon ended up on fire," Finn reminded him. Poe have a brash smile.

"Worked though," he pointed out. There was a clunk and then a grinding noise. Then the door slid open and a little beep sounded. Poe grinned broadly as BB8 rolled into the cell. "There you are, BB8. Boy, am I glad to see you!"

Then Poe blinked as behind BB8 another BB unit peeked in. This one was black with silver ridges. "Who's your friend?" This however was the wrong thing to say as both droids began to vehemently beep and whirr agitatedly.

"Not friends then," Finn guessed.

"9E." Ben recognized the droid that sometimes used to accompany him on missions. The droid wasn't sociable to say the least so it was a surprise to see it. The black droid rolled in quickly, bumped against Ben's leg twice before rolling out just as quickly.

"That was weird….." Finn muttered as he also recognized the droid.

"I think it missed you," Poe chuckled before BB8 beeped once more then gave a selection of irritated whistles. Slowly levering himself up, Ben stared in the direction it had vanished.

"Just as long as it doesn't betray us," he muttered and vanished into the corridor. "Pretty much everyone else has." Poe chuckled and crouched by his droid.

"Well done, buddy," he murmured. "Now have you got that spare com so we can call Chewie and get our ride out of here?"


	9. Nine

**Nine:**

They managed to get down four levels before they ran into a pair of Stormtroopers who were marching through the passageway. The three fugitives and droid skidded to a halt and there was an awkward moment where the Stormtroopers realised there was something very wrong with the picture-but in that moment, Ben advanced, his brow furrowed and gloved hand flung forward, causing the men to recoil in memory of his reputation. And in that moment, he lunged forward, an accurate blow slamming the first stormtrooper back as he wrenched the blaster from his grasp. His fellow had no time to even react before he was blasted and he hadn't hit the deck before the weapon finished off the first man.

Poe and Finn stared at him in shock before practicality set in and they harvested the remaining trooper's weapon. Ben was already heading off to the nearest turbolift, the gun grasped in his hands as Poe shared a concerned look with Finn.

"Wait up," he called as they accelerated after him. He paused as they ducked back, avoiding a squad of troopers who were walking briskly in the direction of the detention block.

"What?" he asked as soon as they had passed.

"I-we-didn't expect that," Poe explained.

"What-you thought I would just hand you in-or stand there and get shot? You really didn't have much of an opinion of me, did you?"

"Never gave us any reason to," Finn pointed out as Ben took a shaky breath.

"I was a monster," he murmured, echoing Rey's words-the words that had rolled around his memory every day since. "Everything I did was for my Master-for Snoke-and for the First Order. Any sentiment was weakness, any past was a canker that had to be destroyed. But Rey never gave up on me. She believed that I could be saved. So did my mother. And when I felt Mom die...I felt her love and her faith in me. Even when she died, she still loved me as a son." He peered at the next group of stormtroopers marching past and found it provided the instant he needed to push down those emotions once more. He would be damned before he exposed them before these men. "Rey saved me. Mom saved me. I made the choice-to reject everything I had been. To become the boy I had tried to destroy." He glanced over. "You need to get that part to the Falcon."

"We need to get it to Chewie," Finn corrected him. "How are we getting off here?"

BB8 beeped and rolled to the nearest data port. Poe nodded.

"We won't all fit in a TIE fighter this time," he pointed out. Ben gave a small smile as they trotted to the port overlooking the main hanger.

"No-we can take that," he said and pointed. The impressive shape of a Command Shuttle was parked, its wings folded up for landing and the ramp down. "It's fast, armed and big enough."

"Unless they send TIE fighters after us," Finn pointed out.

"Are you always this positive?" Ben asked him, his eyes narrowing. He pointed to the left. "You two-go that way. I'll cover you from there." And then he dashed off in the opposite direction. Poe frowned.

"I see what you mean," he murmured. "You could really swear that he is genuine." Then he nodded to Finn. "Now let's get a ride out of here. BB8-stay close!"

Knowing his way around _the Finalizer_ was different to striding around without a care and with everyone cringing away from him in fear but Ben had no time to ponder on the change in his fortunes. The next group of guards he met had clearly heard of the escape and that Peavey had moved against him: they fired on him without hesitation. Turning, he returned fire and picked them off swiftly, his aim unerring. The Force had always helped him hit what he aimed for and he was relieved that, despite the chemical wall that had blunted his ability to access his higher order Force abilities, some of his instincts were still functional. And he had been trained for battle from before he had destroyed the Jedi Temple. Luke had taught him Jedi techniques and Snoke had hammered in lessons on using his strength and anger, never eschewing the lethal stroke or any advantage. He had honed his Force powers to deflect blaster bolts, slam any item he could get his hands on into an enemy and, of course, he had used his lightsaber to terrible effect. Battle had inflamed his blood, heightening his senses so he could taste their fear, smear the metallic tang of blood and the acrid stench of seared saber wounds, hear their pants of terror and the desperate huffs as they tried to escape his hungry blade. And he saw it all, every image branded on the inside of his eyelids, to haunt him every night until the day he died.

He blinked, dropping the last Stormtrooper. Battle had been an act of rage, allowing every ounce of his pain and fear, rejection and hatred and anger to fill his being and forge him into the fearsome killing machine that had been Kylo Ren. He knew his style was brutal, sparing no quarter and thinking only of the kill. The hum of his lightsaber in his hand and the red light reflecting in his dark eyes summoned a demon that only stopped when his enemies were slain. How many had he killed? He guessed he could probably find out if he tried but would it help? Hundreds, certainly. And in his memory, every face was there, the brush of every dying soul through the Force indelibly stamped on his heart. Death had been his friend for so long as he slaved under Snoke and still he had continued when he had ascended the throne because he trusted no one in the search for Palpatine as much as himself. No one could withstand Kylo Ren.

 _Except Rey._ Even untrained, she had bested him. Fuelled by rage at the murder of her mentor Han Solo-his father, he reminded himself with another inward scourge of shame-and filled with her expanding connection to the force, she had beaten him, had maimed him. And she had left him to die. Had Hux not collected him on Snoke's orders, he would have perished on Starkiller Base. And they had patched him up, fast and dirty because Snoke had wanted him to suffer after that abject failure. But it had been no fluke because she had beaten him again, knowing his mind through the Bond and stoking his inner conflict. Until Kef Bir, when she had won and finally defeated Snoke's enforcer, the Jedi Killer. Kylo Ren had died.

He rose and sprinted for the next intersection, checking the way and then running on. His body was trained, he had skills in any weapon you could find on this ship but he would have given almost anything for a lightsaber right about now. And then he burst into the hanger and skidded to his knees behind a container of fuel. The others had entered the hanger a hundred yards to his left and only a dozen steps from the command shuttle. But there seemed to be half a battalion of stormtroopers in the hanger, pinning the escapees down with precision blaster fire. He groaned. The Force seemed to be determined to make this mission as difficult as possible and it was impossible that they could make even the short sprint to the shuttle without being killed. But there was a TIE fighter a couple of yards behind them.

Taking aim, he picked off half a dozen Stormtroopers, trying to suppress the unsettling thought that the men and women he was killing were people not that different to Finn-maybe from the same section-who were just following orders. He couldn't let himself consider that they were taken as children or bought from orphanages and raised for this purpose, stripped of any choice in their future. That they were expendable. If he faltered now, he would fail them both. The troopers needed to focus on him while the others got away. Then he fired one careful shot right next to Finn.

The man looked up immediately, his blaster levelled straight at the dark shape. Rolling his eyes, Ben gestured to the fighter behind them and he was relieved when he saw the former stormtrooper pat Poe on the arm and the pair appraise the options. Snapping off a couple more shots, he checked his blaster and read that the power unit was redlining: he would need a new one soon. But in the meantime… He glanced around, carefully locating the fuelling tethers for the fighters and shooting at them until he managed to ignite the fuel. And explosion ripped through the hanger and under its cover, he saw Poe and Finn scramble into the TIE fighter with the droid and roar out into the inky blackness. There were still too many stormtroopers between himself and the Command Shuttle so he ducked down, shot another stormtrooper and snatched the fresh weapon as he barreled past, diving through the blast doors and blasting the controls to close them.

They would scramble pursuit but he guessed Poe would handle himself as well as he always did. The 'finest pilot in the Resistance' actually lived up to his own hype and Ben was sure he would get them away. They would rejoin the Falcon and get safely back to the Base.

But Ben wouldn't be with them. He would steal one of the longer range TIE fighters and complete the journey on his own. It was better this way: Rey's friends wouldn't be in danger and he wouldn't have to continually justify himself to them when he couldn't justify himself to himself. He knew what he had done, what he owed. He was a monster. No penance or reparation could ever repay for all the deaths he had caused, all the evil he had done. He deserved to die and she needed to live. There were so many people who loved her and cared for her and who would love her to live so that they could grant her the family and belonging she had earned. The future needed Rey: he was the past, the evil that had been defeated and that merely lingered to poison the chances of hope for the Galaxy.

_Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to._

He had been right. But he hadn't realised at the time that he was talking about himself.

Another couple of pairs of Stormtroopers tried to intercept him and he gunned them down without hesitation, avoiding their comrades when he could. The level was flooded with more and more troopers and he found himself slowly running out of options. He needed to get away so he descended to the port hanger he was searching for, where his TIE Silencer had been berthed for so long. He had to duck back, past patrols and doubled back on himself more than once before he finally reached his goal. Pausing and checking for any troopers, he emerged-to find the hanger deserted and every vessel gone. His eyes widened and he turned back-but the blast doors closed behind him. Every other blast door closed as well as whitish gas billowed into the hanger from every single ventilation grille. Covering his mouth, he cast around for a breather to at least give him a chance to find a way out-but every installation was empty. Realising that he had been anticipated, he turned back to the doors but the controls didn't respond, even when blasted so he went in search of the environmental controls. Coughing and choking, he felt his knees buckle, dumping him on the smooth metal. Grimacing, he tried to crawl to the panel but the blaster spilled from his nerveless fingers and he collapsed onto his face. But as his consciousness slipped away once more, he found himself mulling over Finn's words.

_"Why wasn't he this easy to capture when we were fighting him?"_

-o0o-

"How come we're back in a TIE fighter?" Finn asked as Poe flew them back towards Andaku. Chewie had howled a few questions over the com which BB8 had translated .

"You're lucky you got another chance to show me what ya got as my gunner," Poe teased him, his tone completely self-confident. The General was never happier than in the cockpit of any fighter and this time, the TIE fighter didn't hesitate-and nor did the five in pursuit. But Poe was already throwing the stolen fighter into a ferocious spin as Finn picked off their pursuers.

"Hope I'm not disappointing you-General," he shot back as another fighter disintegrated into an expanding cloud of debris and gases. Poe chuckled as they strafed the surface guns to enable their escape before they flipped away. Flying fast and fearlessly, they arched down into the dense clouds of Andaku, spinning round a cyclonic vortex and leading their pursuers to back off from the turbulent atmosphere of the planet. First Order they may be but it seemed that they were not authorised to risk their vessels by playing tag with Poe Dameron.

"Not at all-General," the pilot laughed back. "Looks like our buddies don't fancy the weather. Do you have the coordinates for the Millennium Falcon?"

"Fifteen minutes to landing," Finn reported and then sat back, flipping the weapons system to standby. "Hopefully, we won't crash this time!" Poe grinned.

"Hey, I'm wounded," he quipped back. "That was one time and we both survived!" Finn chuckled and nodded but the smile fell from his face and then he sighed.

"You realise we lost him?"

"The thought had crossed my mind," Poe admitted wryly. "And I think it's how he planned it. He made sure we knew the numbers of the remaining First Order ships and we have the location of the Finalizer. He knows we need to know that."

"And he gave us the part," Finn murmured. "He wanted us to get away. He wanted us to be...safe…" His brow furrowed.

"He could be playing us and returning to his own kind," Poe argued, though the words lacked conviction.

"Or he could be in trouble," Finn said quietly. Snatching a glance over his shoulder, he saw a thoughtful look in his friend's dark gaze. He slammed the harness forward.

"I know that look-and believe me, I don't want to let him get away either," the pilot mused, "but maybe this is for the best…"

"For who?" Finn asked and he took a deep breath. "When he talks about Rey, his eyes light up. There is genuine grief and affection in his voice."

"Affection? Buddy, are you sure you didn't hit your head…?" Poe teased him.

"Love," Finn insisted. "And I believe him when he says he will do what it takes to get her back." He sighed. "I feel she's in trouble as well." Poe groaned and then slammed his head backwards against the flight seat.

"I knew you were going to say that," he muttered. "Just as I know what you're going to say next…" Finn nodded and leaned forward.

"Rey needs our help," he decided. "And I know...I know...that she needs Kylo Ren. So we drop the part off with Chewie, alert the Resistance-and then we go back."

-o0o-

They hadn't been gentle. Not that he would have expected any consideration, once Peavey had made his stance plain, but it ranked among his worse awakenings. Strapped to an interrogation chair, welts on his face and body from the staff interrogators softening him up-all of it was familiar and what should have been standard practice. But as the former Supreme Leader of the First Order, a small part of him felt cheated. He would have expected more.

An armoured fist slashed across his cheek and spilled blood on his pale skin, though he gritted his teeth against making any sound. His head dipped and he felt the irritating trickle of blood dripping from his jaw as his vision greyed. He swallowed as the interrogator stood back, apparently satisfied with his work and his chest heaved as he strove to calm his breathing and fight back the surge of anger, the siren call of darkness that he had worked so hard to silence. He knew what he had risked when he separated from the others, when he made his choice.

 _And look how well my decisions are going so far,_ he noted ironically, lifting his head to stare steadfastly ahead, not gracing his interrogators with the slightest acknowledgement of their presence. Not that it had mattered anyway.

No one had asked him any questions.

His vision was still settling when the door opened and two officers entered: the quiet presence of Captain Peavey and a lieutenant who appeared familiar...Mitaka, his name was...who had acted as his liaison when the Finalizer had been his base. The man who had witnessed Kylo Ren's rage more than most, who had been treated cruelly and viciously in his towering outbursts. Perhaps, even amid his rage, he tried not to kill anyone though he knew that he really hadn't cared when he was blinded with the fury but he knew with shame that there had been casualties during his time here...perhaps why the interrogators had set about their work with such relish. Peavey looked him up and down and appeared mildly disappointed.

"I had expected you to escape," he commented. "And it would have been more convenient all round. Now you are here, we have to prise every iota of information about the Resistance from your head, Ren. I did not expect standard methods to yield any results."

"Especially if you don't even ask a single question," Ben said thickly.

"Would you have answered them?" Peavey asked him evenly.

"No."

"So there you are. No point in wasting energy," the Captain said. He sighed. "Of course, the art of interrogation is sadly underestimated and has been neglected in favour of your arcane sorcerer's methods. No finesse. No skill. Just brute force."

"Not unlike what you've tried so far," Ben replied, his eyes still fixed on the wall ahead. He had no doubts that the Captain had a point to make. Peavey looked over to Lieutenant and nodded. Was it his imagination that Mitaka's lips lifted in a small smirk, that he stood back with an arrogant snap of his head as a panel opened and a black metal globe floated out, the hum of the antigrav motor jarring.

"Of course, the old Empire were skilled in extracting information from traitors and saboteurs," Peavey admitted. "And though your predecessor, Lord Vader, was an expert in extracting data, he often used the Imperial Interrogators as well, seeing mind-probing as beneath his skills and frequently unnecessary." The taunt was cutting and would have blinded Kylo Ren with rage. The Captain gave a thin smile, as if reading his roiling emotions and probably unaware of the struggle he was having to control his anger and prevent the darkness rising once more.

_If I can just grasp the anger, I will be able to access the power…and then, Captain, I will crush your larynx like a piece of shell. I will watch you struggle for breath and claw desperately and watch your lips turn blue as you die…and then everyone else on this corridor will follow you…_

He blinked.

_You chose. You knew what you had to do. You didn't know if you had the strength…but Dad believed. Even as I killed him, he still loved me, still hoped for my redemption. Even as Mom died, she reached out for me…to save Rey but also to save me. She loved me with her dying breath. And Rey…risked everything to come to me on the Supremacy. She believed I could be saved. And even when she dealt me that fatal blow, she saved me. How can I become the monster they all died to destroy…?_

_No matter what happens, I remain…Ben. Not him. Not Kylo Ren. Not the monster._

The hum grew a little more insistent as the low lights in the room gleaming off the needle probes that the interrogation machine carried. "I very much doubt that your sorcerer's ways will protect you," Peavey told him casually. "Mitaka-if you would? Please report to me when you're done."

"What do you want?" Ben asked, his voice husky with the ongoing struggle to control his anger and fear. He already knew what the device could do, knew the specifications from his training and his obsessive researches into anything and everything connected with his grandfather and former role model. He hoped the combined stubbornness of his parents and the strength he had built enduring Snoke's brutal teaching would be enough.

The Universe was really _truly_ having a laugh at his expense.

"The Resistance," Peavey told him as he headed for the door. "At the moment, the Galaxy is in flux. If the central leadership of the Resistance was wiped out in one fell swoop, the scattered First Order Forces would be able to reassert their authority on certain key systems and prevent the fall into anarchy." He paused. "You are going to tell us where they are and then we will destroy them."

The door hissed shut and Mitaka nodded. Then he turned to Kylo Ren, his eyes flicking over his former tormentor as the machine moved forward.

"Shall we start?" he said.


	10. Ten

**Ten**

Rey found herself swathed in ice and fire, battered by a hurricane of power. Around her, the air was poisoned by the malignant presence of Snoke, clammy and viscid and foul with cruelty and evil.

"Young Rey," he breathed, his voice sending shivers down her spine from the memories of those minutes in his evil presence. Alive, he was a black maelstrom, more treacherous and dark than the dark space below the Jedi Temple but dead, he seemed even more dangerous, a powerful current dragging her closer and closer to his sphere, tainting her with his very proximity. Just feeling the edge of his toxic presence reminded her of those agonising moments as she matched herself again the Supreme Leader-and was found wanting. He had sifted through her mind with complete ease, uncovering every corner of her memory and she had been utterly powerless. There was no resisting him as she had Kylo Ren: Snoke took it all and as brutally and painfully as he could. He had sensed her potential, categorised it and taunted her with the loyalty of his instrument, Ren…but in the end, he had lost. His own manipulation had undone him because their Bond had made them stronger, made them closer…and had allowed them to make their own decisions. Kylo…Ben…had saved her and slain Snoke.

"What are you doing here?" she hissed, drawing every ounce of calmness into herself. Since those moments on Exegol, she had felt connected far more closely to the Force, felt the power of every Jedi flow through her. It was there, just a thought away, filling her with light and warmth and belonging…and even amid Snoke's ferocious attack, she was able to call the light to her and cause him to pause.

"I believe we share a purpose, child," he said patronisingly, dark tendrils of Force wrapping themselves around her and she felt bile rise in her throat. She had never felt this constricted by the Darkness, even when she had faced the Emperor but as she centred herself, forcing the tension from her body and drawing on the Light. But despite that, an attenuated humanoid shape coalesced from the fog. The pallid blue eyes were colder than the depths of space, the scarred and deformed head looming over her.

"But you…" she mouthed.

"Oh silly girl, you have no idea," the former Supreme Leader chuckled, moving towards her and extending his talon-like hands towards her. Her body stiffened, rejecting his attack. "My powers far transcend anything that you have experienced or read…"

"Snoke," Rey managed to utter in pure astonishment as she felt another sickening tsunami of the Dark Force energy pour over her. "But I thought the Darkness…when Palpatine…"

"And here I thought you had more brains than my foolish apprentice," Snoke said haughtily. "Not even the Emperor's granddaughter is that smart it seems."

"You knew?"

"Girl, I've known all along!" Snoke laughed and his laugh felt so sickening. "I could smell him on you. It was laughable, watching you being so weak, so pathetic when all the time, the Galaxy was your birthright. Scavenging scraps of metal from the wrecks of your grandsire's fleet? Pathetic!"

"How can you still be this strong! Palpatine said he made you!" Rey retorted as she tried to move back.

"There are more ways to make someone child," Snoke smirked. "Surely you can feel it…."

Rey had goosebumps as she tried to take a step back. Snoke took a step forward while saying "The reason I wanted you….."

"You tried to kill me!" Rey retorted.

"It made you stronger didn't it!" Snoke shot back. "Child, haven't you felt that familiar feeling…" For a sickening second, she felt his cruelty and manipulation enswathe her, his lies and half-truths and inferences seeking to confuse her and manoeuvre her to where he needed her to be…but she closed her eyes and a small smile lifted her lips.

"No," she said calmly. "Palpatine is gone. The Light remains."

"And I am the strongest left," he taunted her. "I know why you are here, girl. You seek to return-as do I." He gestured. "We hover at the breach, by Dathomir. Here the walls are weakest…but Dathomir is a Dark stronghold. My powers will be strongest while yours diminished."

 _Though I defeated the Emperor, the Lord of the Sith on the Sith Homeworld,_ Rey thought, inspecting the shape facing her. He chuckled.

"Your body will be waiting, child-but yours may not be the soul to occupy it," he taunted her and her eyes widened. The vision flashed before her eyes once more-of the spectre she had faced on the ruins of the Death Star II on Kef Bir. Of a Dark Empress with sharpened teeth and red eyes and a double-ended red lightsaber, her soul a pit of cruelty and hatred and evil. The being Palaptine would have made her, the future she had baulked from when she rejected Kylo Ren's offer to rule at his side…the future Snoke sought.

"No," she said. "No. I will not allow it."

"Child…you will have no say. The ritual asks for what you cannot give, what your friends cannot offer and the sacrifice which no one will be able to complete…" Snoke sneered.

"What?" she breathed. He waved his hand through the fog and she screamed, dropping to her knees. White hot daggers lanced through her mind, tearing and slicing with utter mechanical cruelty. She felt blinded and almost insane with the agony…and yet she knew instinctively that it wasn't her pain. It was resonating down the Bond that Snoke had probed and pried open once more.

"Ben," she breathed. Snoke laughed scornfully.

"My failure of an apprentice," he scoffed. "He was riven in two by the death of his father and his conflict consumed him. He could have ruled…but instead, he turned away from his destiny. And now…he can't help you, Rey. Because he can't even help himself. The First Order have him…and they will tear him apart!" Head snapping up eyes blazing, Rey gritted her teeth and reached out, trying to touch him, to offer him comfort and strength-but just like that, the Bond was snapped shut once more.

 _Snoke is keeping us apart,_ she realised. _He fears what we are together._

But another, more pressing thought swirled through her mind as she staggered back, away from Snoke.

_What is happening to Ben?_

-o0o-

He awoke slowly, welcoming the dim lighting of the cell where he was still strapped to the interrogation chair. Automatically, he tensed against the restraints and struggled but he knew there was scant chance he could break free. So he let his head slump back and closed his eyes.

He hadn't talked. That was for certain because he would not betray those Rey had given her life for. But he had screamed because no one could resist with the pain the machine had caused him. Worse than Snoke, worse than Palpatine, worse than anything he had endured, all he could do was focus on Rey, on the memories of their bond, on her Light. Clinging to the memories of their bond, of the compassion and hope she had spent on him, over and over when he was so undeserving of anything other than hatred and disgust, was his only armour against the agony that shrouded him. The Imperial Interrogator was a brutal device that was the antithesis of his own abilities, designed solely to scarify and cause pain, setting the prisoner begging to spill his secrets and betray whatever his captors desired. And yet, they had failed. Even with every possible variant, at maximum setting for what seemed like the entire length of the life of the Universe, they had failed to break him. He knew that _he_ had only failed once-with Rey. Otherwise, he had been able to tear what he wanted from his victims, rending information from memories and smashing down every attempt at resistance. And he knew he had caused untold pain as well.

But he thought he had felt her brush against him, felt the faintest caress of her Light against his tormented psyche and the deepest stab of pain had wracked him. There had been something else as well, an acrid edge to the contact that he recognised from years of hating and fearing and answering that mind. Snoke. Somehow, his former master and enemy was near Rey-and that only redoubled his anxiety that she was in peril.

The door hissed open and he tensed. It was automatic because he was in pain and he knew he was vulnerable. Two Stormtroopers and the smug shape of Lieutenant Mitaka entered, inspecting him.

"It's obvious that you are awake," the Lieutenant said. "Good. It makes matters easier." Ben opened his eyes and fixated the man with a hard glare.

"You're wasting your time," he said in a low voice.

"I was given an order and I obey my Commanding Officer," Mitaka told him. He nodded to the Stormtroopers and they walked forward, one fisting his hair and then jabbing a needle into his neck. "You are to be sedated and then taken for further examination." He nodded and the troopers unlatched the restraints then snapped binders around his wrists. He was hauled to his feet.

"It's over," Ben told Mitaka.

"For you," the Lieutenant hissed, his eyes suddenly flaring with repressed anger. "You think there isn't a man on this vessel who isn't waiting to witness your execution? Everyone knew you were a rabid dog, a monster that translated any failure into destruction-on the ship, on those who served you, on anyone stupid enough to be within a mile of you when you threw one of your tantrums. You were an affront to us, those who served and actually maintained the First Order's dominance. And now you turn like a coward, betraying us in our hour of triumph. I'm just glad you didn't break, Ren, because now we get to repeat the process."

"And you'll fail again," Bem told him, feeling his vision blur.

"Your sorcerer's powers won't help you now," Mitaka hissed and nodded. One of the stormtroopers lifted his blaster and the butt creased Ben's skull. He slammed to the ground once more and his head spun...but as he curled up just before he was hauled up, he felt a sudden trickle of power. Not fighting, letting them shove him forward, he felt the faintest brush of the Force breathing through him. Not the symphony of power he had effortlessly wielded before Exegol but perhaps the first signs of return.

It was maybe the first flicker of hope he had felt since she died, since he had cradled her dead body in his arms and felt his heart shattered. When she died, when the bond severed, part of his soul was taken too and ever since, he had laboured in his private hell…but now, perhaps, there was a chance he could get out of here and try to save her. Maybe.

They shoved him forward, driving him through the blue-lit corridors, the reflective surfaces darkening as his presence passed. At every intersection, there was a little nudge with the butt of a blaster or a shoulder that sent him stumbling. It was petty and pointless but seemed in character with the men who were imprisoning him, taking their revenge on him at every possible opportunity. As they walked, he felt the anger begin to build, the seductive surge of power calling to him as he was escorted through the corridors.

_These insects think they can end you. You are Kylo Ren. Embrace your birthright. Crush them._

The Darkness was calling him, the surging power there more than enough to allow him to break free and wreak terrible vengeance on Peavey, Mitaka and everyone else here who had betrayed him…

...and just as swiftly as the thoughts surged forward, they were dismissed as he had ever since Kef Bir. Ben Solo had made the conscious decision to reject the darkness and though the swirling desire for revenge, the hatred and fear and anger were seductive, they were the antithesis of what he had become. At the end, he had turned to the Light. He had rejected the negative emotions that had controlled him, that had _destroyed_ him for years and years. Quietly he reached within his mind and grasped what power he could muster, slowly insinuating it into the binders and clicking the lock open-just a fraction but enough.

He was pushed into an elevator, the door hissing closed and he stared straight ahead-and then sprung into action, ripping his hands free and grabbing the nearest blaster. Two shots dispatched the two guards and then he flung his hand out, the power of the Force freezing Mitaka. The man's eyes widened, his mouth slack with shock and sudden fear.

"Im...possible…" he breathed. "The drugs...the machine...you shouldn't be able to…"

Feeling as if lasers were slicing his head open, Ben narrowed his eyes. It would be so satisfying to tighten the power around Mitaka's neck and squeeze, to make the man feel the terror and pain and helplessness that he had felt under the machine...but he knew that revenge would be a betrayal of Rey. And it would make Snoke proud, that he was slipping back towards the darkness...

"You cannot comprehend what is possible," he managed through his teeth as the doors of the elevator opened. Crushing the desire for revenge, he slammed the Lieutenant back against the far wall of the corridor and then collapsed to his knees as the man slumped, unconscious. Chest heaving with the effort, he found his whole body trembling but he forced himself to his feet and grabbed the blaster. "And that shouldn't have been that hard." He checked both directions up and down the corridor and then ran off in the direction of the hanger.

He needed to get off the ship-and fast. Because if Rey was anywhere near Snoke, then she was in gravest danger. Snoke was old, powerful and far more knowledgeable than Rey-and as such, even in the Force, he still possessed the power to destroy her.


	11. Eleven

**Eleven:**

Clinging to the shadows, Ben managed to stay in the relatively poorly lit maintenance tunnels and out of sight as he headed to the nearest exit point to the interrogation cell. He had to get off the ship and to Dathomir as soon as was possible because she was in danger. That much was obvious through the Bond that had miraculously opened for a few moments to give him hope once more...but had caused him more fear. Snoke was there-and, coward that he was, he feared facing his old Master. The fact that even a small use of the force had drained him so badly was profoundly disturbing because he would need to be at his strongest to even hope to survive but another, more pragmatic, part of him reminded Ben that even that small gesture had been a triumph.

 _Though it really didn't feel like it,_ he conceded.

The problem was the darkness, the old familiar calls of pain and fear and panic. The anger at how he had been treated, then and now and the siren call to vengeance. Every panel and bolt of this ship reminded him of the monster he had been and the echoes in the Force were like a drilling buzzing through his mind constantly. But Rey had believed in him, had expended some of her own life force to save him and for her-and for himself-he forced the blackness down once more.

_"_ _Ben?"_

His head snapped around and he peered at the opposite wall…

...he saw her, standing on a shattered plateau, a roiling blood-red sky framing her and jagged mountains edging the horizon. Her eyes were wide with anxiety until she saw him and he felt warmth blossom in his chest as her expression grew relieved. He rose and walked towards her, staring into her face, seeing her nose scrunch as she saw his face.

"Ben? What…?" she asked, concern flooding through the Bond. He shook his head to reassure her.

"It's nothing," he reassured her, his lips curling in the slightest hint of a smile. He hadn't really smiled for years and the action was unfamiliar. Her brow furrowed and she raised a hand to touch his face, the sensation light and tender. He had expected her hand to go through his flesh but she felt as real and solid as he was, the callouses on her fingers just discernible.

"It doesn't look like nothing," she commented and he found himself smiling more obviously at her concern. She was dead, a disembodied Force ghost and she was worried about a few bruises? "I felt your pain."

His smile faded and he nodded.

"It was inevitable," he admitted. "I was the monster you called me. I ruled by fear, not through loyalty. Even the Knights of Ren turned on me." He sighed. "Where are you?" She shook her head.

"This was where I was led," she admitted. "Master Yoda and Master Luke told me this was a Dark stronghold, a place where evil reigns…"

"You are on Dathomir," he said, his eyes flicking over her surroundings. "Where's Snoke?" She shuddered.

"He vanished," she admitted. "But I know he'll be back. He wants to return-and he needs me to do it." Ben gave a weary nod.

"I should have known that he would try,' he confessed, raising a hand hesitantly hover over, then touch her face. He found himself smiling as she looked up into his eyes.

"Ben...I think it's him or me," she told him, her tone concerned. "He said to come back, it would need what I could not give, what my friends couldn't offer and a sacrifice that no one could complete."

 _He knows,_ Ben realised with a sinking sensation in his chest and then saw her expression change. She had felt his anxiety surge through the Bond. "Stay away from him, Rey. Flee if you have to. He is too powerful to face alone." She gave a wry smile.

"So how are we bonded again?" she asked him, staring into his eyes-those eyes that had always betrayed his pain and vulnerability, even when he was the darkest of monsters. "I saw you-but I couldn't hear you, couldn't feel you...until just now…"

"I think...something has been trying to control our connection," he said haltingly. "Snoke claims he forged the Bond: if so, he would have the ability to influence it. But he cannot break it, Rey. We are a dyad in the Force, two that are one. He may have had a hand at the beginning but what we have is far more powerful than he is now. If he approaches again, reach for me. Use me as your shield."

"Ben-that will put you in danger," she argued and her eyes looked stricken. "It could kill you while I am already…" She bit her lip.

"Rey, you weren't meant to die," he told her, his urgency suddenly feverish. "I know it. I _feel_ it. I should have been allowed to spend my life to bring you back...but I couldn't. This may be my only chance to atone. So many people have died because of me: Dad, Mom, Luke, you...and I cannot let you pay for my crimes. You stopped the Emperor. I helped kill worlds. The Galaxy needs Rey the last Jedi: I'm not sure it needs Kylo Ren or Ben Solo." She sighed and moved closer, almost resting against him. Her hand rested on his chest.

"You have endured such conflict, such pain," she murmured. "But I always felt the light within you, Ben. And there is such courage, such selflessness in your heart. You just have to believe in it." He gently touched her face once more and looked into her eyes.

"Believe it for me," he murmured. "And I will give everything I have to bring you back. There are so many people who love you, Rey. Everything you survived, everything you did won the victory. You have earned your second chance." She gave a small nod.

"You came for me once before, Ben," she reminded him. "I trust you. But remember-this time you don't have to do it all alone."

His hand sank through thin air and he was alone in the dim maintenance corridor, his breaths suddenly shuddering through his body. Quietly, he bowed his head and rested his hand against the wall panel. Seeing Rey had been the biggest relief of his life, a vindication of everything he had done so far. Now, he had to steal a fighter and get off this ship…

He turned and found himself face to face with a pair of stormtroopers, their blasters levelled at him. He sighed and the weapon fell from his hand. Then he turned and his hand slashed up, the power of the Force slamming the men back, their weapons skittering away. Ducking to grab his blaster, and gritting his teeth at the sharp pain suddenly boring through his skull. He turned to run when he heard a familiar voice.

"Hey-wait, Ren!" He stiffened as one of the sprawled shapes hauled his helmet off and Finn glared at him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, shocked. Poe dragged his helmet off and scrambled to his feet.

"Rescuing you!" he snarked.

"Oh, that was a kriffing fantastic use of my efforts to get you safely away!" Ben growled. He felt like a lightsaber was being driven slowly through his head. Finn frowned.

"You okay?" he asked, his tone concerned. Nodding curtly, Ben turned away.

"I presume you had a plan?" he asked shortly. The pain was really blinding. But connecting with Rey had been as easy as breathing. So why was even a simple use of the Force so excruciating? "Not just having a kriffing chat until they find us and then getting captured again."

"Someone's snarky," Poe commented.

 _Someone's head is exploding,_ Ben thought grumpily. Finn pulled his helmet back on.

"He is right, though," he said. "The longer we're stationary, the more likely they are to find us," The pilot jammed his helmet back on.

"I can see why you defected," he grumbled. "I already hate this uniform and I've only just put it on." Then he gestured. "Gimme the blaster." Ben glared at him.

"No."

"Can you explain to him, Finn?" Poe asked in exasperation as Finn stared at him.

"Why me?" he asked incredulously and then turned to Ben. "If you are unarmed, we can pretend you're a prisoner…"

"And this is doing wonders for my image," Ben found himself muttering. "Kylo Ren captured by...well, everybody." Unexpectedly, Poe clapped him on the shoulder.

"You know, I could get to like the sarcasm," he commented. "Don't worry. We won't hand you over to anyone. But it may throw them off if we look like a prisoner transfer."

"That's been cliched for decades," Ben commented. "I recall my father once telling me about how he rescued my mother…" Poe clapped him on the shoulder again.

"That's why it will work-because no one would ever expect it," he said brashly and took station at Ben's other side. Uncomfortable but unable to muster any good objections, he reluctantly handed over his blaster and allowed them to place binders around his wrists-though unfastened. Finn glanced up into the taller man's face.

"Don't worry," he assured the prisoner. "We've got this all worked out."

Immediately, alarms sounded and Ben found himself shoved forward.

"And that's our cue to leave," Poe said as they accelerated to a fast walk along the passage. Every sense on edge, he suddenly realised Finn was still inspecting him closely even as they escaped.

"What?" he asked.

"Did you use the Force to…?" His hand made a swirling motion.

"Yes."

"How?"

"Do I need to explain?" Ben asked. Suddenly, he was feeling exhausted and in pain, weary to his very bones. He just wanted to get away and escape this constant reminders of everything he had done, everything he had been in this place.

"Not now," Finn conceded. "But be ready." They swiftly took a turbolift down about ten decks and then the trio found themselves in front of a bank of escape pods. Ben's head snapped around and he stared at his companions.

"You're not serious?" he asked them, his tone incredulous. "We'll be shot out of the sky…"

"About that…" Poe said and then shoved him forward. Ben was tall and powerfully built but the push took him off guard so he stumbled forward and landed on his knees in the pod-and before he could move, he found himself ejected.

"NO!"

Did the idiots understand what they had done? On _the Finalizer_ , there was the hope of stealing a ship and heading for Dathomir as soon as he could but now, he would have to persuade Finn, Poe and Chewie to come-and risk their lives on a quest that he more and more had a bad feeling about. He shrugged the binders off and scrambled into the seat, then rested his hands flat back against the outer skin of the escape pod. He quietly lifted his chin and closed his eyes, reaching out beyond the bounds of his skull and trying to feel the Force flowing around him. The Force was always thinner in space, the attenuation of the life force between its blazing clusters on worlds and in spaceships mingled with the few hardy organisms that could cling to existence in the lonely airless cold. The patterns weaved and shifted as lives began and ended, as peace and violence, joy and fear and love swirled and changed by the minute.

And above, there was t _he Finalizer_ , the ventral guns swinging round to target the escape pod. He could feel the flow of power through the systems, charging the batteries as they prepared to target him-and the other helpless escape pod that had launched, Within, he could feel the minds of Poe and Finn...Finn who was also Force sensitive. _How had he missed that?_ But then, the First Order had wanted to crush all Force Users save those they owned and destroy any competition rather than nurture others out there. He hadn't been looking either and all his attention had been on Rey-and guarding his back against those who were looking to undermine and assassinate him. And he had been drugged and unable to analyse anything, until now.

His head was throbbing again and he wondered if this was going to carry on forever or if he would finally be able to use the powers he had earned through so many sacrifices without such pain. The initial lock wasn't on him at all but on the closer pod. Taking a deep breath and stretching out with all his strength, he nudged them aside using the Force just as the guns fired. The blast missed by inches.

"Too close," he grunted to himself, his vision blurring. He felt as weak as he had when Palpatine drained Rey and him down on Exegol, almost every ounce of his strength gone. Then he slammed his head back against the back of the seat and arched his back, rolling his own pod sideways. The next blast was too close, filling the viewing port with brilliance and momentarily blinding him. His vision took a lot longer to come back than he was expecting but he was already sensing the next blast and used the Force to slam both pods onto diverging trajectories, the next blasts missing the pods by a slimmer margin.

They were both rolling now, a sensation that only became problematic when he looked through the viewport and realised they were heading directly for Andaku's atmosphere. Once they entered the clouds, they would be committed to land and the planet was under the _Finalizer's_ thumb. His head snapped up and he realised he wasn't going to be in time as another blast lanced at the other pod.

A battered Corellian freighter arched round and the energy boiled off the shields as it intercepted the shot. He could feel Poe and Finn exult in relief as their rescue finally arrived: as he watched, a net shot out and captured the pod, hauling it into the hold. His eyes widened as he recognised the Falcon and he sagged for a second, almost spent-and then his head snapped up. Gritting his teeth and stretching his strength to its limits, he deflected the next blast that was aimed to destroy him. He could feel the energy almost searing his own skin, his body shaking with the effort of diverting it harmlessly away. He had fought battles, slain scores with nothing but his lightsaber and his own strength for a fraction of the effort-but he had done what he had planned. Rey's friends were safe.

The cannon was swinging round again and this time, he knew he wouldn't have the strength to stop the shot. Bowing his head in resignation, he reached out for her.

"I'm sorry, Rey," he murmured.

Then he found himself wrenched sideways as an energy net wrapped around his pod and he was hauled out of range by the Falcon. He slumped forward onto the padded floor of the pod and gave a sigh as they swiftly hauled him into the hold and the door slammed. Immediately, they went to lightspeed and he managed a small smile. He felt her presence, like a gentle wash of sunshine just before everything faded to black.


	12. Twelve

**Twelve.**

"How many?" Rose's voice was shocked and she knew that she wasn't the only one disturbed by the turn of events.

"The Governors, Prefects, Electors and Monarchs of eighty-two worlds have demanded Kylo Ren's rendition for trial and public execution," Commander D'Acy reported, her face troubled. "In addition, the Hutts, the Guavian Death Gang, the Kanjiklubbers, the Slaver Guild, the…"

"I think we get the picture," Beaumont Kin sighed.

"There are currently thirty-four extremely generous bounties on Kylo Ren's head," D'Acy added.

"Any more good news?" Rose asked, willing the older woman to shut up.

"Somehow, word of his escape has gotten out and all of them mention the Millennium Falcon as well," D'Acy concluded.

"That's hardly a surprise since almost everyone here believes he should stand trial and pay for his crimes," Beaumont conceded.

"But it does mean that some of your friends have been communicating with these people for them to know about the Falcon," Jannah commented, walking forward. Lando nodded.

"Not to mention the small matter of the few remaining First Order ships and bases that didn't go down when the Final Order was defeated," he added.

"And our co-leaders are stuck in the middle of a scrum of bounty hunters, all of them tasked with bringing Kylo Ren back, dead or alive," Rose sighed. She looked up. "Contact the Falcon. If you can't get hold of them, send our fastest remaining ship to find them. The war isn't quite over and we can't have our leadership running off."

"And if Ren has them?" D'Acy asked. Rose gripped her pendant and stood, her face determined.

"Then we rescue them and bring him back here to pay for his crimes," she said. Everyone nodded and set about their tasks as Jannah paused.

"I think I know just the ship-and the pilot," she said.

-o0o-

Waking almost wasn't worth the bother but he did it anyway, forcing his eyes open and waiting for the host of pains to make themselves known.

The first thing he saw was the strange bird that was sitting about three feet away, between the bed in his cabin and the door, apparently nesting on his cloak. He blinked and raised his head a fraction, blinking his bleary eyes and wondering if he was hallucinating. The creature was a squat smooth brown and white with big eyes and stubby wings. As he stared, it made an incredibly jarring noise, someway between a scream and a really bad yodel, and then it turned and waddled away. Realising he was back on the Falcon and didn't seem to be in chains, he sat up, swung his legs over the edge of the bed and waiting for the vertigo to settle before he stumbled up and slowly made his way out of the cabin.

The others were in the cockpit but no one looked up as he slid into the vacant seat behind the pilot, grimacing as he jarred a variety of injuries he had picked up. The elongated light blurs of hyperspace filled the forward window as Poe leaned forward.

"So there are over eighty worlds we can't go anywhere near and pretty much every major organisation has a price on his head?" he checked. There was a pause.

"That's what we've learned," Rose reported. "A number of them were not happy we didn't just hand him over the moment we returned from Exegol."

"Well, that would have been easier," Poe conceded, frowning. "But it wasn't the right thing to do-and we're all in this to do the right thing."

"Even for the wrong people?" Rose's tone was hard.

"Depends who decides who's the right or wrong people," Poe suggested. "And once you start making those judgements, you're no better than the First Order."

"Who are also after him," Finn added. "Poe's right. The right thing is for everyone."

"Not for him," Rose said. Finn sighed.

"You did the right thing when you stunned me," he reminded her. "Even though I was a Resistance hero. Because you thought I was doing the wrong thing. And you know? You were right!"

"Hey, what?" Poe asked, craning his neck to look at his friend.

"Long story," Finn explained. "Rose, you did what was right no matter who it applied to. We have to do the same now."

"The bounties all apply to Ren-and all name the Millennium Falcon as the ship he's on," Rose added. Chewie gave an irritated growl.

"You got it, Chewie," Poe agreed. "This is just great."

"You should have left me to escape on my own," Ben murmured.

"Yeah-that would leave all the Bounty Hunters after us!" Poe protested.

"And the Hutts and the Slavers Guild and the First Order and Guavian Death Gang and...everyone!" Finn added.

"Is there anyone who doesn't want to kill you?" Poe asked Ben as he glanced over at Chewie.

"Your droid?" Ben suggested.

"Nope. He tried to set you on fire!" Poe shot back as BB8 beeped indignantly.

 _"_ _Runs in the family_ ," Chewie commented. Ben sagged back in the seat, not disputing the truth in the Wookiee's growls..

"My father was a rogue and a scoundrel but I am- _I was_ -a monster," he said tonelessly. "He never set out in his business to deliberately harm another being, he just had issues with delivering smuggled goods on time and honouring loans...while I killed and ordered the deaths of thousands."

"And yet, Rey still believed in you," Finn reminded him.

"From what your friend said, she was definitely in the minority," Ben murmured. "You should have left me. Probably would have been for the best."

"And yet...Rey was our friend," Poe announced. "And despite the fact that half the Galaxy is on our tail, you think there is a chance to get her back."

"And none of us will ever be able to rest if we don't explore every last possibility to bring her back," Finn said honestly.

"Besides-it's just like old times!" Poe grinned.

"Your old times!" Finn protested.

"Nah-we've been chased, shot at and gone on crazy missions over the last coupla years," Poe reminded him.

"It will be dangerous," Ben reminded them. "You'd be safer dropping me off and letting me finish this on my own."

"And you know that's not gonna happen, right?" Finn told him sternly. "In case you hadn't realised, we are going with you."

"You know I don't play well with others?" Ben checked. "Last time I burned the Jedi temple down…"

"Yeah-but you were evil then," Finn riposted. "Face it-this is non-negotiable." Poe nodded and Chewie added his growl of agreement. Even BB8 gave a few whistles of support. Ben nodded and then got up, walking slowly back towards the communal area. Images flashed across his memory, each worse than the previous one…

_...Poe, staring up bloodied and unbowed from the interrogator's chair, spitting defiance as he inexorably forced open the man's mind and tore whatever he needed from his memory, his screams of agony echoing round the room…_

_...Finn, FN2187, traitor, facing him in the snowy, darkened woods of Starkilller Base, the blue lightsaber washing his features pale, his inexpert attacks toyed with by Ren until he went for the killing blow…_

_...Chewbacca, roaring his rage at the shell of his best friend's son, screaming in fury and hatred at the man who had just ignited his lightsaber through his own father's heart, watching Han's final paternal gesture before he fell...and blasting Ren's side with a shot that should have been lethal if not for the Force…_

_...Rey, facing him with a blaster, valiantly trying to delay him from acquiring the droid, clearly terrified but willing to give her life for something that she truly believed in. Rey, thrumming with latent power she had no realisation about, power he sensed and unleashed when he tortured her. Power that turned back on him, shocking him and sending him scurrying back to Snoke like a shamed cur. Power that had blossomed until she was his equal and opposite-and his soul mate though their Force Bond. Power that had enabled them to talk, to touch, to Bond even across lightyears and across the shattered ground of Exegol. That allowed her to heal him, to share her thoughts and fears and that final briefest of touches before she died…_

He leaned against the wall and screwed his eyes shut.

_And even across death._

He dropped to a crouch, his hands pressed to his face. The more he thought about it, the more it would drive him insane-but not with anger and rage and hatred but with shame and pain and isolation. The Dark Side would get to him through his misery and pain and he would find it harder and harder to resist. He swallowed. He had been alone all of his life, pushed away and disregarded by his parents, treated with suspicion by his peers, condemned by Luke...and even when he served Snoke, the Supreme Leader had treated him like a pet, to be encouraged when necessary and chastised when he failed. But he was always alone with his pain, always suffering and swathed in darkness, isolated from his men, his Knights, his family. Always the dark presence at the back of the room, instilling terror and fear and hatred...

 _You are not alone,_ she told him. Was that her or his imagination? Because memory would not be enough to see him through. Everywhere was a reminder of what he had done, the terrible, horrific things he had done. Memories of the single-minded madness he had embraced, believing in Snoke's twisted vision, willingly an accomplice to the darkest of Evil. But the more he thought, the worse it became. Every death, wound, hurt...haunted him and returned to swirl around him. And maybe if Rey had been with him, he could have dealt with the pain, swathed in her light and support but alone, there was no one to face the demons and the consequences of his sins but him alone. He was alone fighting the darkness and the pain. He knew...if it failed, he would never recover. She who thought she was nothing, had become his everything.

 _Meditate_ , she urged him. _Clear your mind. Control the pain and darkness. I am with you._

"Rey…" He took a shuddering breath. He hadn't tried meditating since Exegol, wasn't even sure how it would go, since his abilities to sense and manipulate the force seemed haphazard still.

_I am with you…_

Reluctantly, he walked to the centre of the room and sat down, crossing his legs and grimacing a little. He was stiff and he ached but he stiffened his spine and closed his eyes, clearing his mind of everything. Slowly, he drew into his centre and then waited, allowing his senses to expand out, praying, praying that he would be able to find some peace…

-o0o-

"He's been quiet for a while," Poe commented as they remained in the cockpit, checking the power flows. Chewie had ambled out to check the new components but had finally come back indicating he was satisfied. BB8 had obligingly rolled along by the Wookiee but had swiftly come back when Chewie had roared at him. Finn stretched.

"He may have gone back to sleep," he admitted. "He looks pretty banged up."

"I'm sure he's looked worse," Poe reminded him.

"And he made sure he got us away," Finn added. "They recaptured him, didn't they?" Poe's eyes glinted and he looked at his friend. Both were not innocent where the realities of the war were concerned and had taken hard choices in their time.

"Yeah-well, maybe it was justice he learned what it felt like," Poe said and turned back to the controls, his eyes flicking from switch to switch. Finn sighed. There it was again: the unsaid festering anger that Poe harboured for Ren, the refusal to let go the brutal and appalling intrusion Ren had perpetrated when he ripped information from Poe's mind. Something told Finn that _the Finalizer_ hadn't had access to Ren's Force-fuelled abilities in his interrogation so they had used more brutal methods-and that the man was concealing a lot from them… Abruptly, he rose.

"You know, whenever I try to rescue people-except you, buddy-then they've already escaped. And Ren was on his way out," he said. "But I still oughtta check on him." Poe scowled.

"Why?" he asked, slightly petulantly. Finn sighed.

"Because we're the good guys," he reminded his friend. "And like him or not…"

"Not!" Poe put in.

"...he's trying to get Rey back. And we said we would help him. So we have to honour our promise." The pilot sat back and shook his head.

"I know, buddy," he conceded. "It's just...hard not to see him as the monster who turned my head inside out and ripped everything from my brain. But...he is trying to help...and they won't have been any more merciful to him than they were to me."

"Less," Finn reminded him. "He's a traitor after all." Poe grabbed his cup of caf and took a sip.

"Aren't we all," he said as Finn headed out to find Ben. Determinedly, the former stormtrooper checked Ben's room-finding it empty with a Porg nesting on Ben's discarded cape-and then set out to find the man. He located the former Supreme Leader in the communal area, cross-legged and floating maybe a metre in the air, his eyes closed and hands resting on his thighs. More curiously-reminiscent of when they had seen Rey practising-there were skeins of items orbiting the man. Finn frowned, seeing various tools, some nuts and bolts, one of the Porgs which looked distinctly unhappy and an old helmet.

Quietly, the former stormtrooper walked past and sat at the table, his eyes trailing over Ren with something akin to envy. Finn had thought through the fact he was force sensitive but he knew as well he was a dwarf in comparison to Rey and Kylo Ren. There was no way he could even imagine himself as their equal in any way, shape or form but the memory he had, of switching on the lightsaber and facing Ren amid the snows of Starkiller...for that one instant, something inside him had felt right. And no matter the outcome-which had been inevitable when you considered a man who was holding a lightsaber in battle for the first time (he didn't count his pitiful efforts on Takodana) against the Master of the Knights of Ren, a man who killed using the weapon hundreds of times…

His eyes widened and his head jerked up because something was wrong. His head felt thick and fuzzy, like a fog or a hangover and he felt an unexpected dizziness assail him. Superimposed on his vision, a darkness was seeping into the air around them, the lights dimming. The ship shuddered and he heard Poe curse in the cockpit but he heard and groan from much closer by. Guiltily, he looked up-to see Ren's face furrowed with pain, his brows scrunched and jaw tight. Finn tensed as he heard the man moan again.

"Rey…"

Ben suddenly jerked, his eyes wide open and dark. Finn could see they were filled with pain and confusion and a sudden vulnerability that the man had never shown to the former stormtrooper. His entire body jerked and arched with pain, arms flinging wide and fingers splayed as if an electric current was surging through him. He jerked again and a scream burst from his lips, his entire body jerking in pain. Suddenly on alert, Finn saw the objects that had been orbiting Ben in his meditation fly out in an explosion of tools, small ship parts and one annoyed Porg and he dived for cover.

"Poe!" Finn yelled as the ship shuddered again and the lights flickered more strongly.

"Kinda busy here," the pilot shouted back, wrestling with the controls. "No, I don't know what's happening either," he added over Chewie's accusations. Finn glanced up and saw Ben jerk once more and then slam to the ground, lying still, a thin trickle of blood coming from his mouth.

"POE!" Finn shouted, his head snapping around. As soon as it had arrived, the darkness was gone. He scrambled to Ben's side and checked for a pulse-faint and very fast but still there. "POE! We have a situation. It's Ren!"

"Now what?" the pilot shouted as the ship levelled and suddenly, everything seemed back to normal. Finn stared into the unconscious man's face and sighed.

"You know-I really don't know," he murmured. "But I think he needs help. And now."


	13. Thirteen

**Thirteen:**

Dropping out of hyperspace, the Millennium Falcon swooped gracefully over a ring of debris and landed on the small moon of Hraxis, orbiting the gas giant of Cusulee. The moon was a rocky almost airless hunk of nothing but Kineva Station was one of those out-of-the way lawless outposts where anything and everything could be purchased-at a price. The Republics-both of them-and the Empire had ignored the outpost, dismissing it as too small to notice and not important enough to waste the effort on so many smugglers congregated in the cramped modules, bathed in violent neon glows, breathing stale-smelling air and eating food and water that had been recycled too many times. There were still some slaves and indentured workers hidden in the backrooms and brothels which no one had ever bothered to release and everyone was viewed with suspicion-and as a mark.

The Falcon hardly looked out of place and was by no means the oldest or most battered freighter to pull up at Kineva but eyes would have noted her arrival. Because eyes noted everything on Kineva and Poe Dameron knew that by the time they had walked along the long connecting tubes to the main station from their distant (and therefore cheaper) docking position, the main players would already be fully aware of their arrival. The only hope he had was that word of Ren's bounties hadn't reached here yet.

Ren had remained deeply unconscious, his breathing shallow and occasionally hitching as he dreamed. And the dreams were horrific to behold, his entire body writhing in anguish, arms warding off shades and screams as if from the pit of hell. And then, just as suddenly as the storm had broken, it would pass and he would lie once more pale and unresponsive. No one knew what to do and only BB8 could offer much in the way of reassurance-that Ren's vitals were still strong, though the little droid could offer no insights to the cause of his illness. Reluctantly, Poe had left the droid with Ren while going out with Finn and Chewie to try to find someone willing and trustworthy to treat the former Supreme Leader.

The passageways were largely deserted and the jarring hum of the air recyclers was louder than would be expected in any civilised outpost. There were spots and smears of orange and green corrosion on the metal plates of the walls with clumsy patches. Finn glanced around.

"Are you sure this place will be able to help?" he asked Poe. "Or even stand long enough for us to get there or back before it falls to pieces?" Shaking his head, Poe kept his eyes fixed on the airlock door ahead.

"Relax," he said with more confidence than he felt. "We're here with the Resistance. I'm sure we'll be able to find someone here to help!" Chewie growled. "Okay-pretty sure," he amended and opened the door.

A riot of colour and noise hit them in the faces, the miasma of scents of cooking foods, oils, human and alien bodies, blood, perfume and ozone wafting in their faces. Chewie gave a moan and shook his head desperately. Finn sighed.

"I get that," he murmured as they moved through into a moderate sized plaza, surrounded by neon-signed brothels, food outlets and shops selling various chemical stimulants. Poe grinned broadly and clapped his friend on the shoulder.

"Okay, buddy-here we go," he said, plunging into the thronging crowds.

"I hope you know what you're doing," Finn muttered as he followed him.

-o0o-

_He was on Starkiller once more, deep in the bowels of the Oscillator and walking with purpose because he was hunting the intruders...and he could sense a familiar presence that gnawed at the edges of his mind. Someone he had thought he had put behind him...a last link to his former life, a man who had disappointed him and rejected him and caused the boy he had been untold hurt and pain. He swept further in the struck out across the gantry to the far side of the enormous space to continue the search,_

_"_ _Ben!"_

_He paused and turned, not giving a single sign of emotion, save taking a few steps back towards the tall shape approaching._

_"_ _Han Solo. I've been waiting for this day for a long time."_

_His voice was sneering, cold. And he spoke the truth: he had been waiting for so long to prove his loyalty to Snoke, to sever the last threads of his old life by disposing of those who had spawned him and then rejected him, afraid of his power, of his enormous potential. They had sent him away to Luke, to his Uncle, the famous, revered Jedi who had tried to murder him. Only Snoke had offered him sanctuary...at a price. Snoke who taught him, forced him to expand his powers at the risk of his life. Snoke who taunted him for his weakness and praised him for his ruthlessness. Snoke whose punishments were so terrible he feared them more than anything. Snoke who he hated as well as served. Snoke who had only gotten his hands on him because his own damned father had rejected him._

_And Han Solo had gotten old. Still tall and straight but the old rogue's face was more lined and weatherbeaten than ever. His eyes twinkled still and his hair was grey. And his voice was rougher than his son remembered._

_He wasn't his son. Ben Solo was gone. He was Kylo Ren._

_"_ _Take off that mask!" the old man said, his tone both commanding and compassionate. He inched forward. "You don't need it. Not here. Not with me."_

_"_ _What do you think you'll see if I do take it off?" His voice was pitying._

_"_ _The face of my son."_

_"_ _Your son is gone. He was weak and foolish like his father." His tone was angry, angry at the reminder, angry at his father for being here and forcing his hand. Angry for all those times Han hadn't been there. And angry at himself because a part of him still loved him for all those other times that he had was. "So I destroyed him. But such a small insignificant request is easily granted." He reached up, carefully removing the mask, staring at his father, seeing the shock and relief in Solo's eyes. The inspection was careful and then the man gave the slightest of nods._

_"_ _That's what Snoke wants you to believe. But it's not true," he added, his voice lowering a fraction. "My son is still alive. I'm looking at him right now."_

_His anger flared, filling him with the desire to push this man away, to defend what he was and reject that other life._

_"_ _No! The Supreme Leader is wise. He knows me for who I am and who I can become. He knows you for what you really are, Han Solo. Not a General. Not a Hero. Just a small-time thief and smuggler." The older man managed the faintest flash of a smile._

_"_ _Well he's got that part right," he conceded with a trace of humour-and then he walked forward, without a hint of hesitation as if he was approaching a skittish animal. "Snoke's using you for your power, manipulating your abilities. When he's gotten everything he wants out of you, he'll crush you. You know it's true. If you have half the ability, half the perception I know you do, you know that I'm telling the truth. Because, unlike him, I have nothing to gain from it."_

_He felt a shiver of regret that was instantaneously quashed._

_"_ _It's too late," he said abruptly._

_"_ _No, it's not. Leave here with me. Come home." He closed further. "Your mother misses you."_

_That strike hit something in his heart, the regret he had concealed from the very start. She was the first being he had felt, the warmth that had cradled and nurtured him, filtering out the darkness and cold and he missed her. Even though she had sent him away, he missed her. He loved her. His eyes shone with unshed tears though he knew that Solo could see them. His throat was thick with the effort of speaking._

_"_ _I'm being torn apart. I want-I want to be free of this pain."_

_They were almost face to face and he found his chest tight. Snoke's words rolled around his head and the anger warred with the sudden painful longing to leave, to go with this man and return to the family he had abandoned. Snoke's voice repeated on a loop, over and over, whispering poison into his mind as he had done almost all of Ben's life, corrupting the prodigiously talented child and turning him away from the Light._

_But he really wanted to go home._

_"_ _I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the strength to do it." His voice...those fateful words. Something inside him wanted to scream, to grab him and pulled his hands away. He looked up into his father's eyes, almost pleading. "Will you help me?"_

_"_ _Yes. Anything," Han Solo said, never taking his eyes off the young face facing him. Easily, he unclipped his lightsaber and moved it between the two men, the blade facing sideways. Offering a small smile, Han placed his hand over his son's, closing around the unstable device…_

_...and then his hand tightened. Ben/Kylo gave a gasp, his eyes snapping wide open as the blade impaled his chest. The red flickering light of the blade turned his father's eyes red, casting deep shadows on his rugged features. He thrust the blade forward and Ben gave a slight gasp, his eyes wild._

_"_ _Dad…" he mouthed. Solo gave a low growl._

_"_ _Your mother is ashamed-and so am I," he hissed. "You betrayed everything she worked for. And though she asked for you to come home, you know this is the only way. You made your choice all those years ago and you can never come back. This is the only thing I can do to protect her-and lay my son to rest!"_

_The blade deactivated and he felt the man move away though the burning agony in his chest remained. Reaching desperately for Solo, for Snoke, for anyone, he felt his life ebb and fade. Slowly, he toppled sideways and vanished into the depths…_

-o0o-

"No. Can't help!" The little green alien was the fifth medical practitioner who had turned them down and Poe was beginning to despair that they would find anyone who would be willing to even look at the patient. Money seemed to be no issue: the moment they mentioned he was a Force User, the healers shut down. In desperation, the former pilot asked if there was anyone who could help.

"Tamini," was the answer.

Frowning, he emerged to find Finn and Chewie trying to discourage a group of orphans were were clustering around them. Poe yelled and grabbed the nearest one's arm, twisting the thin limb until the child cried out and released the credits she had pickpocketed. Scooping them up and releasing her, she hissed and then ran away, calling to her friends. He pushed the credits back into Finn's hands.

"Gotta watch the little ones," he advised. "Stay sharp." The former stormtrooper nodded.

"This is a rough place," he commented. "So same answer?" Poe nodded, running his hand through his hair in frustration.

"Tamini," he repeated.

"And where do we find this Tamini?" Finn asked, his dark eyes flicking from person to person. He was uncomfortably aware of eyes on him. Poe sighed.

"Kaalan Kon Kolb," he revealed. Finn stared at him, recognising the faint exasperation in his tone.

"And that's bad why?" he asked. Chewie gave a whine.

"Kaalan Kon Kolb is the big boss round here-and I may have had a run in with him when I was with the Crew," Poe mumbled. Chewie gave what was definitely an unimpressed growl as Finn stared at his friend.

"Really?" he asked in shock. "Is there anyone you haven't had a run in or annoyed?"

"Some people," Poe replied defensively. "Maybe on the Mid-Rim since I haven't actually been there much…" Finn rolled his eyes.

"And I just thought Ren was the popular one," he commented. "But…"

"Yeah, yeah-we need to see if this Tamini can help," Poe conceded.

"Or we could check with Maz first," Finn said suddenly. "She may be able to confirm if Tamini is the only option. And she does understand something about the Force." There was a pause as Poe considered. Generally brash, confident and independent, the former pilot and now de facto leader of the Resistance was very self-sufficient and preferred to be able to sort problems out for himself. He hated being out of the loop and not involved in all the decisions so contacting the base back of Ajan Kloss was an admission that he had run into something they couldn't handle. Not that the whole mission was something he preferred not to handle, from the moment that Ren and Finn had effectively kidnapped him. In fact, Ren's appearance had caused a major fracture in the Resistance, so focussed when fighting for their lives but now pulling apart when the main danger had been defeated. Everyone had his or her personal vision of what a post-First Order Galaxy should look like and many of them were diametrically opposed.

Yet Ren hadn't been what he had expected, no matter his personal feelings towards the former Supreme Leader. Every fibre of Poe's being screamed that whatever had happened to Ren was the Universe repaying him for the uncountable evils he had committed and if having his mind wracked by ghosts and nightmares for the remainder of his life was what was going to happen, maybe they shouldn't try too hard to stop it.

And yet...Finn believed that he was sincere when he said that he knew a way they could get Rey back. That there was hope that the final loss of the Jedi could be avoided. And Rey, who came from nothing, who had worked harder and more determinedly than anyone in her time with the Resistance, deserved a chance. Even if it meant dealing with the man who had turned Poe's mind inside out. A man who clearly had feelings for Rey and who had demonstrated he would do what it took to complete the mission-even to the extent of risking a return to the First Order when he had turned his back on them.

_And they had turned their back on him._

Kaalan Kon Kolb was a dangerous man, a heavyset humanoid whose grey skin was certainly blaster resistant and whose remote purple eyes positively twinkled with delight when he was condemning a rival to death. Poe had seen those eyes as a small-time pilot for the Crew when they dealt with Kolb's Gang and he never forgot the screams as they spaced a young woman who had disappointed the leader and the laughter as they had killed her lover.

"Check with Maz," he murmured.

-o0o-

"You're in a pickle, flyboy," Maz had told him bluntly, her eyes twinkling in amusement at his chagrin. "Tamini is one of the good ones. Her Mother learned her trade before the Clone Wars when Jedi were commoner and she definitely had experience in dealing with Force-related mishaps."

"Maz-we don't know what this is," Poe told her honestly, though she could sense his exasperation. Her lined orange face moved into a serene smile.

"Well, he was meditating and suddenly he had a convulsion, you said? And he's been out of it since? Sounds like a Force issue to me!" she told him calmly. "And there are few people who could offer him much aid-none here, by the way. You struck lucky when you landed on Kineva. The next nearest is gonna be on Coruscant."

"Which will be swarming with bounty hunters," Finn put in.

"Could he wake on his own?" Poe asked.

"Who can tell, kiddo?" Maz replied, smiling. "Get him to the healer and see what they can do for him." And then she leaned close to the camera. "But Ben Solo or Kylo Ren is a very powerful Force User. For him to be taken down can only mean a more powerful one attacked him. And that could mean a problem getting him back...or trying to rescue Rey."

-o0o-

Rey was bored. Time seemed to stretch endlessly and all she could do was prowl the red-washed, jagged and distinctly hostile land of Dathomir. For someone who had spent her life busy, working or training almost every hour there was, it was an exotic and cruel form of torture.

She couldn't reach Ben again, which concerned her deeply. There was something-fragments of darkness, echoes of pain, confusion, fear...the emotions she had sensed through the bond when Kylo Ren was struggling with his own inner demons, the conflicts stoked by Snoke and fought between his inner light and the almost overwhelming darkness that had tainted his soul. She could feel pain, flashes of it occasionally causing her to wince as she explored the serrated landscape. Suddenly, she stopped, her entire core filled with enormous sadness and terrible, terrible guilt. And then pain, confusion and despair.

Instinctively, she reached out to him, trying to project calm and reassurance-but every effort rebounded off the smooth, impenetrable barrier she felt separating him from her. Beyond the barrier, he was reaching for her, writhing in pain and desperate. Concentrating on those final moments on Exegol, on the unutterable relief and triumph she felt when he stood at her side and they faced the Emperor together, she reached out to him. Focussing every ounce of the adamantine determination she had possessed in pursuing him, in believing that she could turn him to the light, in healing him from the lethal wound she gave him, she prised a tiny hole through the barrier between them and tentatively reached out to him.

Suddenly, she found herself drawn down the connection, images flying past her, chaotic and jarring. Some she recognised-Han Solo's death, their multiple lightsaber battles, the death of Snoke and the resulting battle with his red-clad Praetorian Guard, the crash on Pasaana...and others that were alien, deaths and attacks and confrontations across council tables. And over and over, she saw the bloody floor of Snoke's chamber and caught the edge of such pain and cruelty that made her heart break.

Floating above, she realised that they were inside a building, the rough stone walls throbbing with power and the shrouded shape of an alien manipulating power as she held him captive. Trapped in a column of bluish light, Ben was hammering his fists against the barrier, screaming for her to go. His frantic expression made her turn...and freeze.

Behind her, there was a monster, swathed in darkness but wearing the face of Palpatine.


	14. Fourteen

**Fourteen:**

Kaalan Kon Kolb was the master of all he surveyed. Bulky and thickset with tough greyish skin and clothed in silks and metallic fabrics, he cut an imposing figure. His club was as elaborate as his dress, mirrored walls and brilliant lights chasing away any shadows and foiling any attempts at fraud or cheating. Gamers and chancers mingled around the tables and half-clad dancers of all varieties writhed and ground away in their cages while the band delivered their best. Any employee who disappointed Kolb tended to end up marooned on the airless surface with a blaster hole in their face.

Moving through the vibrant multicoloured throng, Poe fashioned a bright smile on his handsome face. Calmly, he pushed to the bar and ordered three generic drinks, smiling as three portions of a greenish liquid were delivered. Finn and Chewie flanked him as they all huddled at the bar, sipping the drink. There were three intakes of breath and then Chewie gave a loud moan.

"Yeah," Poe agreed. "I remembered it being better as well…" Finn cast him a look.

"It couldn't be much worse," he commented. "So what now?" Poe sighed and leaned forward towards the barman.

"Can you tell Kaalan that Poe Dameron wants to speak with him on a Resistance matter?" he murmured and the man nodded, waved to his colleague and vanished into the crowd.

"Is that wise?" Finn asked him as the former pilot shrugged.

"We're Generals in the Resistance who are trying to locate another of our best fighters by getting help for the man who can take us to get her," Poe reasoned. Chewie gave a low moan.

"I agree," Finn said. "Weak." Poe cast him a glance.

"So now you speak Wookiee?" he teased his friend.

"That needed no translating," Finn told him easily and sipped his horrible drink. "You know this grows on you."

"So does Hothian Bindweed," Poe grumbled.

"Mister Kolb will see you-Poe Dameron," a gruff voice said behind him and they turned to see a broad faced reptilian with black eyes and little golden scales over his cheeks.

"Hey, Queedo-good to see you!" Poe replied as the creature gave him a snort.

"If you weren't Resistance, Mister Kolb would have shot you the moment you set foot in Kineva," Queedo sneered, his face twisted in a disgusted look. "But word has it that the Resistance has won, leaving the First Order scattered and broken. So killing the leader of the Resistance would be bad business." Poe nodded, resting his almost-untouched cup on the bar and glancing at his friends. As one, they rose and followed him around the periphery of the room, past the bar and through a beaded screen that concealed a discreet forcefield into Kaalan Kon Kolb's private salon.

The room was dominated with writhing and gyrating humanoid dancers, wearing little but a few strips of silk and smiles, and a golden throne containing the solid shape of Kolb. Armoured enforcers had station in the corners of the room, all bearing blasters that Poe knew Kolb would be very willing to use. He grinned as he faced the man who ran Kineva.

"Kaalan!" he greeted the Boss.

"General Poe Dameron," Kolb growled, his voice like two rocks grinding together. "You owe me a cargo of spice…" Frowning, Poe glanced at his companions.

"I was under the impression that the Crew had already sorted that misunderstanding out," he replied with complete confidence. "And if not, we can negotiate...once we secure your help. We need your healer Tamini for our crew mate…"

"Who may or may not be the infamous Supreme Leader of the First Order, Kylo Ren," Kolb commented. Poe gave a shrug.

"He may look like him but last I heard, Kylo Ren had a nasty slash across his face that our friend Rey gave him with a lightsaber," Finn offered. "Our friend Ben doesn't have one." Kolb inspected him with interest.

"You are the traitor to the First Order, the Trooper who defected?" he guessed and then his gaze slid to the Wookiee. "And we've met, Chewbacca. When Han Solo borrowed my ship to go in pursuit of the Millennium Falcon…" Chewie gave a low moan. Kolb snorted. "So what am I likely to get in return for lending my healer?"

"I don't suppose the goodwill of the Resistance is good enough?" Poe asked him. The gang leader chuckled.

"You aren't dead," he explained. "That's the limit of my goodwill." Nodding to himself, Poe looked over at his friends, expecting the answer and studiously ignoring the guards covering them with blasters.

"Okay, Kaalan-let's negotiate," he said.

-o0o-

_The sensation of his mother's mind, wrapping around him in love and longing was pierced with the sudden horrific sensation of his own lightsaber piercing his body. His eyes widened and mouth opened in a soundless gasp. Rey looked up, her eyes dark with hatred and anger as she stilled, the blade crackling and burning through his body. And then she deactivated the blade, stumbling back as she realised what she had done._

_"_ _Leia," she breathed as he too felt the sudden disturbance in the Force, the final snap of his mother's affection. Many light years away, General Leia Organa's lifeless body slumped back onto her cot in the rebel base of Ajan Kloss but on Kef Bir, the broken remnants of the man who had once been her son felt his heart break. His legs buckled and he fell, the crumpled metal of the ruins of the Death Star supporting him as he gasped, feeling his life ebb._

_Rey was crying, tears trickling down her cheeks in the double grief of the loss of Leia, the only mother figure she had ever known and the knowledge of what she had just done. She had won, delivering him a fatal blow and now, as his life faded, he could only look up at her. Finally, slowly, her eyes met his. There was dismay, shame...and then decision. Unable to understand, to believe what he was seeing, he watched her drop to her knees by him, resting her hand on his body, the touch featherlight and yet carrying the weight of a world. His breathing was growing shallower and erratic, his body growing cold as he felt it: the surge of energy, of life that flowed from her into him. Before his eyes, the hideous hole in his body rippled and closed, the skin repairing itself, becoming new. He took a deep breath, feeling his strength return in a rush and he looked up into her beautiful face. Under her watchful eye, the scar faded from his face and the other injuries from that battle on the Starkiller Base melted away. She pulled her hand back._

_"_ _I wanted to take your hand," she whispered. He took a shuddering breath, sensing her emotions. "Ben's hand."_

_And then it all came crashing down around him, amid the violent spray and cold of Kef Bir. He had lost. Kylo Ren had lost. Everything he was, everything he stood for was defeated. She had it all in her grasp, had embraced the darkness of anger and hatred to defeat him...and she had renounced it. Even when she won, she would not let him die. She had loved his mother and that love and her own inner light had impelled her to give him some of her own life force to save him, despite everything he had done, every evil he had perpetrated against Rey and the Resistance. Despite the unforgivable crime of killing his father, his mother had still loved him-and Rey had spared his life._

_He was done._

_So he watched as she ran to his Silencer and took the unique craft with the sole remaining Sith Wayfinder, soaring into the grey sky. And he had stood there, his mind an utter mess of contradictions, grief and shame, the freezing waves soaking his body as his mind had conjured the ghost of the man he had wanted to speak to the most._

_"_ _Hey kid."_

_The voice was exactly as he remembered it, the tone filled with warmth at odds with his previous vision. The grey hair framed the familiar, rugged face and the twinkling eyes of his father-intact, not pierced by his lightsaber as he had been when he died. And he was dry while Ben was soaked to the bone._

_Why did he think of himself as Ben all of a sudden when he had spent a decade erasing his birth identity for Snoke's attack dog and apprentice, Kylo Ren?_

_"_ _I miss you, son."_

_The words pierced his heart, the surge of guilt crippling. Since Rey broke him, defeated him for what could only be the last time, his armour seemed to have shattered and his worst sins were swirling around him in a black smog, images playing over and over in his mind. He had done so many terrible, unforgivable things that he wondered if the parade would drive him mad but central to every montage was that moment he had driven the lightsaber into his father's heart, the wide, shocked look in his face and the tender, brief touch of his hand to Ben's cheek before he fell away._

_I killed him to free myself but instead, it tore me in two._

_'_ _Your son is dead." The words were a stubborn echo of every answer he had given since he made that decision in the ruins of the temple. Ben Solo was dead, broken by Snoke and replaced by Kylo Ren. He had no idea what he was now. But his father knew._

_"_ _No. Kylo Ren is dead. My son is alive."_

_The confidence was beyond question, the kindly compassion of a man who was gone. Maybe this version of his father had existed and he just never registered-but Ben suspected this was the version he had yearned for over all those years when Han Solo had vanished, trying hard to be a man he was not and failing. There had been good times-and bad, days when his father hadn't been there, birthdays missed, promises broken because General Solo had reverted to the smuggler and general rogue, Han Solo. The truth swirled painfully around him._

_"_ _You're just a memory." His voice was hoarse._

_"_ _Your memory," Han reminded him, staring into the pinched face. Then he sighed. "Come home."_

_Home. What was home? Where was home? Not the house he had grown up in, abandoned when the parents he had loved had broken apart and dumped their son with his Uncle because they were scared of his powers and more scared of the responsibility and sacrifice required to look after him and raise him instead of continuing on as they always had. Not the temple with Skywalker, the place where he had been lied to, held back, ostracised and finally condemned to be put down like a diseased beast, too tainted by Snoke to be granted any chance for redemption or hope. Not the First Order where he could not return in failure, knowing already they would turn to Palpatine and kill or subjugate him if he fell into their hands. Certainly not with Rey, who had made her feelings clear when he disappointed her on the Supremacy._

_Home was people. Home was belonging. Home was warmth and security and maybe love. And he had none of those things. Maybe once, briefly. But now…? Only one person had steadfastly clung to a desire to bring him home._

_"_ _It's too late. She's gone."_

_It was like an open wound that no one could heal. His mother. He hadn't been able to kill her on the Raddus, his thumb moving away from the firing control when he sensed her presence. His relief when he felt her alive, buried deep under the layers of anger to prevent Snoke from sensing. His conflict as he had led the attack of Crait, a small part of him recognising Luke's diversion for what it was and not caring because it gave her a chance. She was the only home he had left-and he had felt her die, felt her final, loving caress forgiving him for slaying her partner and husband, the only man she had ever loved though she couldn't live with him. Forgiveness he had never deserved and never would._

_"_ _Ben…" The word was another stab. They still called him by his birth name though he had done nothing but bring shame to the name of their old friend and mentor. He swallowed and the words stuck in his throat. The same words he had said before he had ignited the blade and perpetrated his worst crime._

_"_ _I know what I have to do...but I don't know if I have the strength to do it."_

_Han had smiled then._

_"_ _You do."_

_"_ _Dad…"_

_Han had nodded._

_"_ _I know," he said._

_And then he had flung the lightsaber into the furious seas-and himself with it._

-o0o-

Rey spun, her hand conjuring Leia's lightsaber and activating it with the same motion. The monster-and it was a monster, all bulk and tentacles and spiny, gangly limbs, scuttled closer, towering above her as she backed away.

"Go," she urged it, putting her whole force into the compulsion.

The monster kept on coming, a stench of putrefaction beginning to wash over her. She resisted the urge to gag, even though she was technically dead and therefore had no lunch to lose.

"Foolish child-do you think I would be influenced by your weak attempts to replicate what I mastered decades before you were even considered?" the monster droned.

"You're dead...destroyed!" she spat, the saber raised. "I destroyed you myself. Your own power expunged you from existence! You're gone!"

"The powers of the Sith are extensive and dark, far greater than any that you could possibly imagine!" the Palpatine-monster taunted her in his precise, rich voice. "Some of which are considered unnatural…"

"Which kept you alive thirty years after you should have been destroyed on the Death Star," Rey hissed. "But your own powers annihilated you on Exegol!"

"I am all the Sith!" the monster sneered, the waves of evil rolling off the creature. "I cannot be destroyed!" A scream burst from her throat and she bisected the creature with her lightsaber. Hurricane force winds swirled around her, battering her as a dark laugh echoed in her ears.

"You strike me down and I am reborn in your body!" the monster taunted her. "I will become more powerful than you could ever imagine-Emperor forever, the Galaxy crushed under my heel until the end of time…"

"Rey!" Her head snapped up.

"Ben?"

A wash of pain surged down the bond, reminding her that he was still alive and suffering. But there was determination there, a clear and cool calculation as he mentally embraced her.

"It's an illusion, Rey," he breathed. "This place is filled with Darkness. I can feel it. And the Darkness always tries to seduce you-through anger, fear, hatred...even love." Her eyes widened.

"Love is lightness," she corrected him. "It gives you strength, focusses your mind and reminds you why you risk all, why you are prepared to make the sacrifice…"

" _Protective_ love, maybe," he told her, struggling against his torture. "But possessive love, jealous love can be just as destructive. It's what turned my grandfather. It's what destroyed him." He groaned. "They're trying to inflame the darkness within you-the anger at being abandoned, the fears, the insecurity, the loss, the hatred of those who stole your life from you. But I know that you are stronger than that. Use my strength as a shield, Rey. I am always here for you."

"I have to get you free," she argued, looking around and back at his trapped shape. As she watched, he writhed again.

"Rey-watch out," he sighed. "Push down the emotions and clear your mind. Concentrate on not hating, on reaching for life and restoring the Balance between us." He reached out at her across the Bond, desperately searching for her warmth, her luminous glow. She stilled, the lightsaber clicking off as she embraced him, feeling his warmth instil her with his strength. He had been far more trained than she, servant of two distinctly imperfect masters but clever enough to learn from both, to reach beyond only what they had offered to uncover the truth. Around her, the hurricane calmed, the pieces of the monster vanished and the red light faded. Only Ben remained in his prison, the sour scent of putrefaction wafting around her as she slowly approached. She winced, the familiar stab of a mind driving into her, wantonly crushing her barriers and clawing at her memories. And she knew that mind, knew the feel of that cold, empty pit, soaked in blackness and cold and cruelty.

_Snoke!_

Her surprise lasted a few seconds before she reasserted herself. She had grown in the year since Snoke's death, her skill and control developing as her powers exponentially expanded. When she had surrendered herself on the Supremacy, he had taken advantage of her in her naivete, her nascent-though prodigious-powers poorly trained and uncertain: this time she was ready. Gritting her teeth and narrowing her eyes, she flung him out and crossed the uneven floor, the lightsaber igniting once more.

"Ben…" she breathed, resting her hand flat against the barrier. His dark eyes widened as he stared into her hazel gaze. Shaking, he hesitatingly managed to raise his larger hand to press against hers, only separated by the crackling energy of the barrier.

"Rey," he breathed. "I will...get you back. I promise…" She gave a short bark of a laugh, dry and bitter.

"You can't even get out of here," she told him. "You're trapped, right?" His expressive face looked stricken for a moment before he nodded.

"This is a Sith stronghold," he told her. "Go to the light. Stay away from here or you may become trapped."

"How did this happen?" she asked. He gave a grim smile.

"Not all the Sith were completely destroyed-and it seems the stragglers want their revenge on me," he sighed. "This is Sith magic. A…Force cell." Her eyes widened.

"You mean you are actually trapped here?" she repeated, seeing the despair in his eyes.

"Yes," he admitted, his voice low. "Your friends are caring for my body but unless I get out of here, it will eventually die-while I am trapped here forever." He frowned. "But I don't know who actually captured me. I was meditating, reaching out to the Force, trying to regain my balance and understand what was happening to me. And how I could right the wrong and restore you." Her eyes widened.

"Ben...maybe this is a sign we shouldn't even try this,' she breathed, the sense of her words suddenly striking her. And there was a dangerous presence out there-one that was powerful enough to capture Ben Solo. There had been a part of her that was hoping it could be done, that she would be able to return to her friends...but she had accepted what was done as well. She had known what she risked when she faced Palpatine and she willingly paid the price. It seemed the Universe wanted to maintain the status quo.

_Rey of Jakku died and Ben Solo, the mass-murderer, genocide and Supreme Leader of the First Order, Kylo Ren-lived._

"No," he breathed, a fresh burst of energy arching through his body once more. "Rey...I know you were not meant to die."

"Live for me, Ben," she said and raised the lightsaber. ""Remember me." The quiet hum sounded as the blade deployed. Then she raised the weapon and slashed through the barrier.

There was an explosion and he was gone.


	15. Fifteen

**Fifteen:  
**

Tamini was smaller than expected, a blue-skinned alien in a scarlet toga with a bulky bag strapped over her back who only reached Poe’s waist. Her big yellow eyes stared ahead, the lids blinking side to side over the bulbous green pupils as she walked swiftly along the tube-like walkway towards the dock where the Millennium Falcon was waiting. Finn and Chewie were holding supplies which the Wookiee had gathered while they negotiated for the healer with the odious and very demanding Kolb. Her hairless head tilted as she glanced up at the three shapes accompanying her.

“So this man…he Force Sensitive?” she asked. Absently, Poe nodded.

“Yeah-you could say that,” he admitted, walking ahead. Tamini frowned, her pointed teeth gleaming in the harsh lights. She had dealt with humanoids for decades and had a wealth of practical experience in dealing with humanoids-including non-verbal language.

“What mean?” she asked, her translator removing any emotion from her tone.

“Yeah-he uses the Force,” Finn added, pausing and frowning. He glanced back over his shoulder and then back along the corridor. Chewie gave a low growl as Poe paused.

“Finn…?” he asked. The former stormtrooper shook his head.

“I’m getting a bad feeling about this.”Poe rolled his eyes.

“Well that ain’t good, buddy,” he commented and accelerated. Tamini glanced from man to man, her expression concerned.

“Should I be worried?” she asked softly but Poe flashed her a quick grin.

“We promised Kolb you’d be safe, Healer Tamini and I can guarantee that you will be safe,” he said with absolute confidence. _On pain of death and our very own bounties. Yeah, well done, Poe!_

“And yet what you said makes no sense,” Tamini murmured. “What happened to your friend? I cannot help him if you don’t give me all the information I need…” They walked along the corridor in silence for a few moments.

“He was meditating…and then…he was struck down,” Finn explained, his brow furrowed. Tamini inspected him, blinking rapidly.

“Is he Jedi?” she asked as Finn and Poe shared a swift look.

“Not really,” Poe murmured. “Pretty much the opposite…”

“Sith?” The healer had stopped.

“Don’t think so…quite…” Poe admitted as the healer stared down the corridor and then back behind them. There was a whine and then, with terrible slowness, an explosion blossomed just beyond the bulkhead behind them.

“KRIFF!” Finn snapped as alarms sounded and a rash of red lights erupted across the partially-corroded panel on the wall. Muttering under his breath, he turned and sprinted for the distant docking bay as Poe turned, then lifted the healer and ran for it as well, heading off after the shambling Chewie. There were cracks appearing in the corridor and he could hear the muted hiss of a slight leak of gas from the atmosphere out into the icy cold beyond. A glance to the right through the plasticlere of the windows revealed the white pinhole jets as their air began to vent. He glanced over his shoulder as the bulkhead sealed behind them, shutting them off from the main body of Kineva Station. “What was that?”

“An explosion!” Poe quipped, accelerating. Chewie was already through the last bulkhead and moving with surprising rapidity up the ramp into the Falcon. Another explosion, much closer had Finn and Poe stumbling and they stared in horror as the corridor behind them shredded. Finn scrambled to the bulkhead and slammed his hand onto the panel as the suction of vacuum began to tug at them. The echoing slam of the bulkhead had them all gasping as Tamini made a shrill sound of distress.

“We need to get out of here,” Finn muttered as they sprinted to the Falcon. The engines were already starting and as he raised the ramp, Poe was already running to the cockpit. The little healer gave a small trill.

“What name of your not Jedi-not Sith?” she asked as there was a shudder and the docking bay exploded. Finn and Tamini found themselves on the ground, clouds of smoke billowing around them.

“Um…Ben Solo,” Finn said after an awkward pause. “POE! We need to get out of here!”

“On it!” the former pilot shouted as the freighter lifted. The doors of the docking bay remained stubbornly closed. “Though a hand with the doors would be a help…” Helping the healer to the crew rest area, Finn gestured in the direction of the cabin where they had laid the unconscious Kylo Ren before scrambling down to the belly gun, automatically powering up and blasting away at the firmly shut doors. There was a whoop from the cockpit up ahead and the ship lurched forward, swooping out into the inky void-and meeting a barrage of shots from a heavily armed and definitely unofficial spacecraft that swooped by.

“We’re under attack!” Finn yelled.

“I never would have noticed!” Poe retorted as Chewie gave a yowl. “Yeah, yeah-I know,” he added. Finn adjusted the guns and targeted the ship as Poe swooped them round and spiralled down towards the gas giant.

“They’re following!” Finn shouted, blasting back. The shots bounced off heavy deflector shields.

“Maybe we should see what they want?” Poe shouted and opened a channel. “Can I help you?” Blasts from heavy lasers bracketed the Millennium Falcon. There was a crackle on the line.

“Hand over Kylo Ren!” a voice grated. Poe groaned and rolled his eyes.

“Can I put you on hold?” he shot back. “We have a ticketing system. You are currently number ninety three on the list!” Another shot shot the ship as the healer gave a wail and scrambled into the cockpit.

“You must call Kolb!” she hissed, her eyes flickering with anger. “You brought me here on false pretences.” Poe glanced over at the furious alien.

“Take a seat!” he advised her. “Kinda busy right now.”

“Would not have agreed to help war criminal!” she hissed. “He should be left to die…if he had not already escaped.”

“He what?” Poe snapped, stealing a glance at the furious alien. “He wasn’t in any fit state to escape…” Then his eyes widened. “BB8! Buddy?”

There was a pause and then a very shaky beep. Followed by another stream of distinctly unhappy beeps.

Chewbacca gave an answering yowl.

“Well that isn’t good,” Poe muttered.

“WHAT?” Finn yelled as another shot hit them. He fired back and the attacking ship lost an engine with a violent explosion.

“He says Ren didn’t escape-because he was still asleep when some aliens came and took him,” he said.

oOo

His head was pounding and his senses seemed to be stuffed with cotton wool but he was conscious and back in the real world. Somehow, Rey had heard him, been able to reach him and he was free…for now. He was under no illusions that he had to go back there if he wanted to free her and get her back-but he needed more information. And he knew where he could find it…if only he could get out of the mess he was currently in.

The last thing he properly remembered was meditating, concentrating on expanding his senses and allowing the Force to wash through him, embracing the eddies and currents and connecting with the energy of life and death, light and dark. The final encounter with Emperor Palpatine-Darth Sidious-had sharpened everything into crystal focus. Neither he nor Rey were dark or light but a mixture, a balance of both and their unique dyad had enabled them to somehow use that balance to defeat the Sith and end the war.

He groaned as his head pounded. He wasn’t sure how accessible the Force would be to him in his current state but the effects of the drug were wearing off and if he hadn’t done something irreparable to himself with the attack while he was meditating, he should be able to break free. Slowly, he lifted his head and peered into the gloom.

He was in some sort of a cargo bin, a space barely large enough for his frame, even with his hands chained behind his back and legs chained at the ankle. The air smelled stale and thin and there were a few stray rays of light seeping through the joints on the lid of the bin. His neck was forced forward by the cramped position and there was an iron collar around his neck. Every muscle was cramping. He was shivering because the bin was cold and he was aware of blood dried on his face. In fact, everything seemed to be designed to irritate him, jabbing at the knot of anger that had been carefully suppressed deep in his gut. But every additional indignity made it harder and harder to resist the call to the darkness, the dull familiarity of anger and rage, of the power to crush and destroy and spread around the pain and hatred he was feeling…

_No!_

_Nononononononononononononononono…_

_Rey had believed in him, ever since Ahch-To. Ever since the Bond revealed his true self to her. Ever since they touched. Ever since the visions…and she had died knowing she had won. She had turned him to the light and he could not betray her by succumbing once more…_

_But a little hint of anger may be the key…_

Arching his back, he tugged against the shackles and the pain as they bit into his wrists did the rest, allowing him to sense the Force, driving the power through the metal and prizing the locks apart. The relief was almost instantaneous as they fell away, landing almost silently on his feet. He spent a few moments moving his hands and trying to uncramp his hands before repeating the trick and quietly unfastening the shackles around his ankles. And then he scrunched as far down as he could, craning his neck and listening, using the Force to check that there were no crew wandering nearby. But they were all in the cockpit, flying the ship through hyperspace on their way to wherever. Struggling in the cramped space, he managed to bring his arms up and grasp the collar, prising the collar apart as well before he silently lifted the lid from the bin and achingly stretched his tall form.

The lights were harsh and the atmosphere was definitely thinner than optimal but he managed to stumble up to his feet and stretch, then slowly turned towards the cockpit where he could sense the crew. Locking onto their minds, he could sense their watchfulness as they checked their course.

He took three steps before a scarifying electric current surged through him and dropped to the deck, unconscious once more.

oOo

The Falcon was definitely getting the worst of the battle as two other ships joined in. All were a mishmash of parts, bolt-ons to older freighters or repurposed fighters or remnants of old worlds and older battles. The common factor was that they were all armed to the teeth, far more than would be expected from their appearance. All were demanding that Kylo Ren was handed over immediately in between trying to blast the Falcon to atoms.

“Bounty Hunters,” Poe grumbled, rolling to allow Finn another chance to blast the third and smallest ship away. Finn was a good gunner and Poe and Chewie were solid pilots but the bounty hunters were determined and reckless, trying to weaken the ship and immobilise her to allow them to board her. Tamini had reluctantly gone to retrieve the droid and BB8 had rolled into the cockpit, beeping unhappily and explaining what had happened.

“Four guys, eh?” Poe murmured as his droid had run through the chain of events. “And they blasted off shortly before we returned.” He rolled his eyes. “Boy, good news travels fast.” He glanced over at the Wookiee. “Any chance we can track the vector they jumped?” Muttering to himself as a series of irritated growls, Chewie nodded and punched in the coordinates. “Not that it won’t be another disaster and…why are we chasing after Ren anyway?”

BB8 gave a series of beeps and Finn blasted the smallest ship apart.

“You think Rey wouldn’t?” he muttered. Chewie growled.

“You know wherever they’re taking him, it will be harder to get in than the First Order’s flagship,” Poe admitted but suddenly Finn smiled, blasting away again.

“Unless we join in,” he said suddenly.

“WHAT? They’re all attacking us because they think we have him…” Poe shouted. Finn grinned.

“First we lose these guys and then we follow the guys who have taken Ren and join in the people wanting to pay for him,” Finn suggested.

“As long as we don’t get ourselves killed first,” the pilot shouted back as they were bracketed by another couple of ships. And then another two ships appeared, one another hodgepodge of rejected parts from a junkyard and the second a sleek vessel that whipped round and without hesitation, fired on the other newcomer.

“What the Kriff?” Finn exclaimed as the ship threw a tight bank and bracketed the largest ship.

“Might have known you’d need my help, Dameron,” a female voice said smugly.

“Zorii?” Poe gasped as he rolled the Falcon and Finn blasted away at the largest ship, this time causing the shields to almost collapse. “ZORII! It’s good to hear you again. Why are you here?”

“Rose thought you may need the help,” the woman said briskly, engaging the other ship. “She seemed to think all those bounties would engage some unsavoury characters to come and chance their luck.”

“Can’t think why,” Finn muttered.

“They’ve got Ren,” Poe revealed.

“What? Then why?” Zorri spat over the comm.

“Some other they,” Poe clarified as he orbited Hraxis. “They snatched him while we were getting medical aid.”

“Any idea where they’re going?” she asked. Poe shrugged.

“We have a vector and maybe Rose and the Resistance can get us a bead on where they have taken him,” he suggested. “Once we get rid of these guys.” In her cockpit, Zorri nodded.

“Follow my lead,” she said confidently. Poe rolled his eyes.

“You know, we’ll never hear the last of this,” he grumbled.


	16. Sixteen

**Sixteen:**

Rey was angry. She knew she probably shouldn't be-anger was supposed to be a quality of the living, especially of those who struggled-but she couldn't help it. Here in the Force, all was meant to be calm but it seemed to be anything but. Her death seemed to be just the first in a series of indignities that all seemed designed to annoy her, out her in danger and force her to watch and feel as the man she shared a Dyad with was put through the wringer.

She was under no illusions that she was hardly the stuff of legendary Jedi. After her death, she had spoken at length with Luke and more briefly with Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn, Mace Windu…and she found herself disagreeing with their philosophy. Their devotion to the elimination of emotions made no sense and their fear of darkness to her mind made them unbalanced and vulnerable. Luke's decision to allow the Jedi to die had seemed inexplicable during her time on Ahch-To but as she had considered longer and longer, the more their beliefs seemed of another age. The conflict between Light and Dark had fuelled the wars that had torn the Galaxy over and over, had caused the deaths of millions and violence and intolerance. Yet all they were was the distillation of the struggles that mere mortals faced every day. Almost no one was purely light or irrevocably dark-the majority were a mixture of both, faced with anger and hatred, hardship, love, compassion, kindness, generosity, greed, selfishness and self-sacrifice. What mattered was what you chose to be, that you resisted using the dark for cruelty and hatred and remained true to yourself. She knew that Luke didn't agree with her-but Luke had given in to fear and had hidden for years, too scared to face the consequences of his actions and do better. The Jedi were afraid of emotions and had tried to expunge an essential part of being human to avoid the conflict…when the conflict was life. Choosing to be the best person you could be was part of being a sentient being-and in Rey's eyes, hiding near Dathomir waiting for something to happen wasn't the best option. Not when she could feel her friends in danger.

So she concentrated and followed her instincts, diving through the swirling eddies of the Force in search of one particular Jedi who maybe could help her in her quest.

oOo

"You know, it's at times like this that I wished we actually had one of those First Order Hyperspace Tracking devices," Poe grumbled. "We had the entry vector but beyond that…may we as well just spin a bottle to work out where they went!"

Chewie gave a long ululating growl and BB8 replied with a small warble.

"What?" Finn asked, exasperated. Poe rolled his eyes.

"The Wookiee said that space is three dimensional and that simply spinning a bottle misses at least one essential vector in plotting a destination," Tamini replied, grumbling. She had reluctantly agreed to sit with the crew in the cockpit as they wrestled with the conundrum of deciding what their next move. She was insistent that they returned to Kineva Station and her place with Kaalan Kon Kolb but no one else was keen to risk further encounters with the bounty hunters to return her at this time. The best they were willing to offer was to drop her off at a safe port to be collected, which was unacceptable to the healer, who knew her value and the deal that had been bartered for her services. The ensuing argument had left her sulking and Poe frustrated, wishing he was still a Commander not a General.

"It's official- _everyone_ speaks Wookiee except me," Finn grumbled, watching his friend. Poe was the first friend he had made, a man who he had helped escape and who had easily and openly accepted the frantic stormtrooper FN2187 who had wanted nothing but to get away from _the Finalizer_ and the First Order. Poe who had given him his name, Finn, because he refused to call a sentient being just by a number. And Poe who had welcomed him with a hug when they had been reunited in the rebel base of D'Qar. Poe who was his friend, his brother, his co-leader and who was ambivalent about this mission.

But Maker-who wasn't? It had been so much easier when it was the small plucky band of Resistance fighters, struggling against the overwhelming odds to bring down the Galaxy-spanning evil of the First Order and their cruel and vicious Supreme Leader, Kylo Ren. It had been so much easier when they were all there-Rey, Leia, Finn, Poe, Rose, Snap, Kaydel, Beau… He blinked and sighed. Then Exegol had happened and suddenly they had won-and lost. Leia, Snap and Rey were dead and the Galaxy was in flux once more. Senators and supporters of the Resistance were coming in, more by the day, all wanting a piece of the glory and demanding their places at the table in shaping the postbellum into some semblance of order once more. And Finn knew he and Poe should be there, intimately involved in the negotiations and the politics…but he could see in Poe's eyes the same disdain of that path.

In truth, this was much more fun. Even though they were apparently acting as backup and bodyguards for the man who had ravaged the Galaxy and tried to destroy them, it prevented them having to think about what they had lost, what was ending and what the Kriff they would do next. Finn only had two homes: The First Order and the Resistance. And on Exegol, they had effectively ended both. Of course, there were still pockets of First Order and there would be work to be done bringing them in but ultimately, the Resistance had destroyed itself by making itself redundant. At least here and now, Finn knew where he was, what he was doing and what his purpose was. What would he be once the mission was done?

The beeping of the comm alerted them and they sped back to the cockpit, with Poe flinging himself into the pilot's seat with a grimace as Rose's hologram appeared. Finn felt his lips lift in a small smile at the woman's image. Poe nodded.

"Hey Rose," he greeted her in a resigned voice.

"How are things going?" she asked, her voice superficially cheerful though Finn thought he could hear an edge.

"Almost to plan," Poe admitted.

"How almost?" Rose asked, frowning.

"Well, Kylo Ren had some sort of seizure and collapsed into a coma," Finn summarised. "Poe took us to Kineva Station to find a healer-but by the time we got back to the _Falcon_ , there were bounty hunters on our tail-they almost blew us up before we got to the ship. When we got back to the ship, Ren was gone and BB8 said that four men took him prisoner and away before we returned."

"He escaped?" Rose asked thoughtfully. Chewie protested.

"Much as it pains me to say it, I don't think he went willingly," Poe sighed. Rose nodded.

"Well, I was calling because the Yanoj Free Traders have just broadcast on all frequencies that they have the infamous villain Kylo Ren and will be auctioning him to the highest bidder on D'Nolos in one standard day," Rose reported. Then she sighed. "I didn't think he would have gone willingly but he could have been captured when he escaped…"

"He didn't escape," Finn insisted as Poe frowned and cast him a glance.

"If that was a general broadcast, then everyone who wants Ren will be able to join the auction in order to get their hands on him-and do whatever they wish," Poe mused, his dark eyes flicking to look at his companions.

"Every world that wants him to face justice for his crimes will have a chance to bid for him," Finn realised.

"Not forgetting the less legal organisations such as the Hutts, the Guavian Death Gang…" Rose continued.

"Which is why we have to be there," Poe said suddenly. There was a pause.

"You want the Resistance to try to buy him?" Rose asked incredulously. "Kylo Ren? The Supreme Leader? The man who led them at Crait and helped kill thousands?"

 _Who helped them kill my sister?_ her eyes silently added.

"He's the only one who thinks we can bring Rey back," Finn interrupted, his eyes fired with urgency.

"And that's almost certainly a lie, a ploy to get you to help him escape…" Rose said firmly. Then she sighed. "Look, I want Rey back. She was one of my best friends. I want to see her again and hug her and…thank her for what she did. But she's dead. Even her body is gone. And I can't believe that we should be risking ourselves on this…"

"But we're going there anyway," Poe sighed, running his hands through his hair. "He's delivered. He says he knows how to get us back. He's saved our lives. And…" He shook his head. "I believe him. And I know we have to get him back."

"Rey wants to come home…but there isn't much time left," Finn murmured. "Rose, we have to do this…" Pausing for a moment with a stern look that eerily echoed Leia, the engineer finally conceded.

"I know," she sighed. "And that's why I'm coming as well. Jannah, Beau and I will come to meet you. I trust Zorri arrived safely." Poe groaned.

"Yeah-and she's spent the last two hours pointing out that we owe her our lives…well, pointing out to me…" he muttered.

"You know it won't be that simple," Finn pointed out as Rose finally smiled.

"Of course not," she said. "But we're the Resistance and Leia would expect us to do everything to get Rey back, if it was possible…and she would want us to help her son." Poe sighed.

"Can I say I'm getting a bad feeling about this?" he asked. Chewie gave a growl but before BB8 could interrupted, Finn sighed.

"He said Join the club!" he muttered.

"So now you speak Wookiee?" Poe asked him. Finn gave a watery grin.

"No. But that needed no translating. I don't suppose you have a plan, General?" Poe flashed his grin as he adjusted the hyperspace coordinates.

"As a matter of fact, General, I have," he said.

oOo

He really was getting fed up. Another awakening, another cell-this one _in_ another cell, the walls blank metal with a force field covering the bars of the door. His body ached, muscles cramped and painful from the electrical current they had put through him. They were terrified of him because they knew what he was-what he had _been_ -and what he could do.

Slowly, he raised his head, feeling an iron collar around his neck once more, needles piercing his skin from the device and hurting as he moved. There were shackles around his ankles and binders that jabbed more needles into his wrists. And as he tensed, he muffled a groan. There were other aches-the hot, bruised pain of kicks that clenched his gut as he moved and his back too. Clearly his captors had vented their frustrations at his escape and enjoyed the kicking they gave him.

Anger flared and he wondered why he was fighting it so much. No one wanted him, no one cared for him now…and there was nothing else he cared for. Like almost all of his life, he was alone. Really, really alone and now, there was no hope, no way out, no one who wanted to draw him back and protect and save him. They were gone-Mom and Rey-and all that was left was the knowledge that he was going to have to face the consequences of his crimes and be executed by someone-probably cruelly and painfully and very publicly so that everyone could sleep a little easier knowing that the Monster was dead.

_You have that look in your eyes from the forest. When you called me a monster._

_You are a monster._

_Yes I am._

He pressed his eyes closed and took a deep breath. Hearing her voice again, even in his memory, hurt. He knew what he was-he always had, though he had lied to himself effectively. And so had Snoke. Lies, half-truths, manipulations. The man had manipulated his memories, abused his emotions, tortured him, hurt him because it would make him stronger…and it had, but it had also made him weaker and brittle. What Snoke had done had damaged him, taking from him the things that gave him control, the foundations of his calm and happiness. He rested his forehead on the cold metal floor. Thinking about Snoke and his manipulations really wasn't helping him, yet now the anger had receded, now he was free of the constant voices hissing in his mind. But it reminded him of what he was, of how he had always been the disappointment, the mistake.

_I'd never felt so alone._

_You're not alone._

_Neither are you._

But he was. She was somewhere-but not alive. Somehow, miraculously amid the eddies fo the Force and his own rather busy schedule since Exegol, he had spoke to her, felt her. Rey was still there, the chance was still there to bring her back…but the truth was that he didn't know how. Somehow, he knew where she was…and he could guess where he could possibly find the information he needed. But to do that, he had to get out of here. And his captors weren't taking any chances. Slowly, carefully, he moved and pulled himself to his knees, feeling the needles pull. Painfully, he lifted his head and stared at the door, seeing the flicker of the force field, feeling the anxiety of his guards as they sat, their blasters levelled at his shape.

"You pull those triggers and you'll lose a planet's worth of bounty," he said hoarsely, scrambling up to his knees.

"It's awake," a Crolute said, his unpleasant face twisted in a sneer, though his hands tightened on his weapon.

"Play nice, Mongur," a masked humanoid said. "He's right. He's worth far more alive." Then he gave a laugh that probably sounded worse due to the mechanical alteration of the helmet. "Though how alive is debatable…" He narrowed his eyes and glared at the man.

"You think this will hold me?" he asked, allowing his voice to grow colder, more akin to the monster he had been. _They wanted Kylo Ren? Fine. He would give them Kylo Ren_. The third guard, an insectoid in a complex breathing apparatus, clutched his weapon harder but a chitinous palp slapped button on the stock and Ben felt his muscles spasm as current seared through him, his body slamming to the floor as the energy flowed.

Memories surged through his mind, images of Snoke sleeting through his consciousness. Snoke seducing him, the words silken and reasonable as he enticed the young Jedi padawan from his miserable existence of blame, isolation, disappointment, fear and misery to another life of power, darkness and immunity to pain. Promises of a glorious future, being the true heir to Vader, of wielding the darkness over a chaotic Galaxy until all was subjugated. Of ruling like his grand-sire before him…

Except it wasn't. Snoke punished any failure, any dissent, any signs that Ben Solo wasn't gone or that the faintest fraction of the light remained. And Snoke was brutal, his mercy non-existent as he repaid any failure with torture, with lightning scourging his form, over and over at Snoke's whim for every imagined failure until he was finally cowed. The feeling of every cell screaming at the assault of Force Lightning, of vision slipping and pain everywhere, driving him to the brink of madness, tormented over and over as he lay writhing in agony. There were scars…from other punishments less exotic but just as brutal…that he had never shared.

But the energy receded, leaving him shivering and more angry than he had allowed himself to be.

"That was the lowest setting of ten," the humanoid told him smugly.

"You make a move towards us, we shock you," Mongur the Crolute said.

"You refuse to do as we say, we shock you," the humanoid added.

"You don't do what we say quick enough, we shock you," Mongur added.

"And you try any of your sorcery nonsense or try to escape, we shock you then kill you," the insectoid chittered.

"Where am I?" Ben demanded, his voice flinty with anger. He had steeled himself but it still hurt when the current surged through him again. Head bowed, raven hair flopping over his face, he trembled as the power surged again.

"D'Nolos," the humanoid sneered. "You're a famous prize, Kylo Ren…and most of the Galaxy will pay millions of credits to possess you-and then kill you."

"Many of them wanting to do it over days and weeks," Mongur sneered. "I'd pay to watch that." Growling, he clutched at the Force-still slippery and beyond his flailing mental grasp-and felt a shudder of despair run through him. It wasn't as if he was totally helpless: Snoke had tortured him for years so he had a frame of reference and more resistance than they would credit or imagine. Somehow, he would have to find a way to turn his leash and collar into motivation, into a way to access the Force and enable his escape. And preferably without throwing away everything he had struggled to become.

_Without reverting to the monster._

"I'll pass," he growled.

So they shocked him again.

A hundred light years away…or maybe just at his side…a pair of hazel eyes widened and for a second, he felt the lightest of touches on his cheek. He gasped, his skin tingling at the gentle caress. Amid the darkening of his eyes, he heard her voice.

"Rey?" he breathed.

_Ben._


	17. Seventeen

**Seventeen:**

It was with a sense of relief that Poe and Chewie landed the _Millennium Falcon_ on D'Nolos, a reasonably cosmopolitan planet that was famed as a major trading post and a venue for all sorts of outlandish and Galaxy-spanning events. And Maker, if this didn't qualify… The climate was humid and sticky, the skies permanently overcast and the lush vegetation corralled in parks around the low-rise and crammed cities, especially D'Nomolos, the capitol with its buzzing space port, huge markets and slave auctions.

The group glanced around amongst themselves before they left the _Millennium Falcon_ and without any discussion, they armed themselves. Tamini decided to wait on the ship, refusing to be left on the planet and repeating her demands to be taken home. It was only when they landed that she revealed that she had been sold through the slave markets on D'Nolos years earlier and that she had sworn never to set foot on the planet again. Despite his exasperation at her intransigence and her complaining, Poe felt a shiver of sympathy and had allowed her to curl up in one of the cabins and wait.

Somehow, Finn was the most chipper of the group, ensuring he had a blaster firmly strapped to his hip as well as a second blaster and a spare. He and Poe had both adopted regal-looking deep blue cloaks and they had managed to find pins with the Resistance symbol on to display while Chewbacca hefted his bowcaster in his arms. Poe glanced over at his buddy, seeing Finn smile back at him.

"You know we gotta pull this off?" he asked the former stormtrooper.

"I'm just pretending to be you, Poe," Finn told him. "But we need to act like the leaders of the Resistance-because that is what we are. We led the Battle of Exegol-and now we are going to get back our two most important missing members. Jedi Master Rey of Jakku-and our secret double agent and the only man who can lead us to her-Ben Solo, the man formerly known as Kylo Ren."

"Good speech," Poe complimented him with a broad grin. "Wouldn't say it so loud though. Half the galaxy wants to dismember him and the rest want to just shoot him! And we have to smuggle him away before all chaos breaks out." Chewie growled and the two men glanced up at the Wookiee.

"You can see them?" Poe murmured as the Wookiee struck out, heading towards the lithe shape in a burgundy jumpsuit topped by an all-enclosing yellow metal helmet. He gave a yowl and exchanged a few words with Zorii, who replied in kind before starting to laugh.

"What?" Finn asked as Poe scowled.

"He said that he was very grateful she saved our asses because us two certainly weren't able to-thanks, pal!" he translated. The woman tilted her head and he could imagine, under the helmet, the smug look in her luminous eyes. Their relationship in the past had been friends, rivals, comrades, even lovers…but now, he was glad she was a friend because Maker, they needed them.

"You know, would it kill you to thank me in person?" she asked, though they could hear the grin on her voice. He smiled back though his eyes remained serious.

"Thanks," he said honestly. "Though I ought thank Rose for sending you as well." She folded her arms and he could imagine her pouting. "But thanks, Zorii. I mean it."

"You're welcome, Dameron," she said, lifting her chin. Then she relented. "I know some of those guys. They were playing for keeps. Your boy has certainly managed to unite them all in a way he couldn't when he was Supreme Leader." Finn chuckled.

"Maybe we should point that out when we see him."

"If we see him," Zorii interjected. "He's worth a system's ransom. Can't see even this crew being stupid enough to let him go."

"I can be very persuasive," Poe offered.

"Don't kid yourself, flyboy," Zorii teased him. "Even you couldn't charm the pants off these guys."

"Ouch-she really does know you," Finn put in, his eyes twinkling.

"And it's gang up on poor Poe day," the former pilot grumbled. "Chewie-ya got them?" The Wookiee rolled his eyes but warbled an assent.

"Now we better meet the others. Rose said you had a plan," Zorii persisted as Poe struck out towards the gleaming citadel. He nodded and fell into step alongside her as they headed in the direction that Chewie indicated, the tall Wookiee leading the way and acting as a furry division of the tide of people. Finn couldn't help noticing that they were part of the most cosmopolitan crowd he had ever been in-and that included his trip to Canto Bight. There were more aliens than he could possible name, humanoids of every description and a hundred different styles of garb, mixed with masks, helmets and cloaks. And then they all froze as they say a flash of white.

Up ahead, there was a cloaked shape, walking through flanked by an honour guard of a dozen Stormtroopers.

"What the Kriff?" Poe hissed, his hands scrambling for his blaster but Zorii grabbed his wrist and held him firm.

"I get the feeling they aren't here to play up," she murmured as Finn huddled close.

"The question is-why are they here at all?" he muttered. Then they all shared a horrified look.

"Ren," Poe exhaled as Rose appeared with Jannah and Beaumont Kin. The shorter women grinned cheerfully.

"FINN! POE!" she said as the pair guiltily looked over at her.

"Hey Rose," Finn said as he moved forward and hugged her. She sighed.

"What's wrong?" she asked, hugging Poe. The pair shared a glance.

"I think this just got harder," Poe revealed as Rose pulled back and looked at her friends. "Apart from every criminal gang and half the planets, the First Order are here."

-o0o-

She found him overlooking a star nursery, deep in the embrace of the most vivid nebula she had ever seen. The gentle silence swirled but the force was warm and calm, the swell of new life energising her. He was waiting with apparently infinite patience, hands clasped behind his back and eyes on the new light bursting from the nascent stars. As they watched, a simmering ball of overheated gas burst into light, the first instants of a burn that would stretch for billions of years.

He was tall like his grandson, straight and balanced, his hair a honey brown and wavy. His face was handsome and calm as he inspected her in his old-fashioned beige and brown Jedi robes, his eyes vaguely amused as she determinedly landed at his side and folded her arms across her chest, refusing to be intimidated.

"Rey of Jakku," he greeted her, his voice different to what she expected-and certainly different to the voice she had heard in Ben's memory. Lighter…more human.

"Anakin Skywalker," she replied evenly, looking up into his face. He was smiling, a slightly lopsided smile that made her heart ache, for she had glimpsed a similar expression a few times on Ben. "You're hard to find."

"I have been where I always was," he told her evenly. "You, on the other hand, have been busy." She nodded and her hazel eyes flicked back to the newly minted star.

"I have to be," she murmured. "My…soulmate, I guess?…is alive and in danger. I need to help him."

"You are dead," he told her.

"He said I wasn't meant to be," she argued.

"And you believe everything he says?" he asked her without any rancour.

"He has never lied to me," she told him boldly. He paused and pressed his lips together in thought.

"No, he hasn't," he admitted.

"So I have to help him," she argued. "I am meant to still be there…"

"Maybe he is not?" he suggested quietly. Staring at him, her brows arched in confusion.

"Why are you being like this?" she asked, suddenly exasperated. "He's your grandson!"

"Never been a terribly good family," Anakin admitted, folding his arms across his chest. "I was responsible for the death of my wife. Me. No one else. My children were hidden and separated to protect them from me. I tortured my daughter and tried to kill my son, taking his hand. In the end, he reached me at the last moment and I died before ever saying anything of worth as a father to him. My daughter and her husband ignored and neglected their talented and lonely son, leaving him vulnerable to Palpatine's manipulations. My son screwed up by seeing the darkness within him and rather than trying to save him, he deemed the boy lost and contemplated killing him, precipitating his flight into the arms of Snoke. I'm not sure I can be of any help."

"You chose the light," she insisted. "In the end, you chose the light. So did he. And it must have been so hard to throw off the years and years of darkness, of manipulation, of shame and rage and sorrow but he chose the light."

"For _you_ ," Anakin murmured. "I saw. I watched. He should have died. He tried to save you. There was…a fracture."

"A fracture?" Her eyes were locked on his face now.

"There are echoes…of a different future that are fading by the hour," he told her. "The Force does not make errors. It just…is. But if you concentrate, you can hear the echoes of that other future, that other time. And Ben is the most sensitive Force User left. He can sense them. He is right: you are meant to live. And you need to be helped because you cannot live without his help."

"The Emperor said we are a Dyad in the Force. So did Ben."

"You don't refer to him as Kylo then?" His tone was mildly amused. She huffed.

"That was a different person, one who died on Kef Bir," she told him.

"He was still a facet of Ben Solo, a persona forged of loneliness, pain, fear, shame, sorrow, rage…but still part of my grandson," he corrected her. "And there are still echoes of Kylo Ren there." He paused. "Just as you carry echoes of the legacy of your family." Her fists tightened.

"Did everyone know but me?" she asked bitterly.

"Those of us who lived through the time of Darth Sidious," he told her simply. "Once you feel the edge of such evil, you never forget it. Luke and Leia picked it up-but it was of no mind. Because your family does not define the light or dark within your soul. You can always choose what you want to be, the path you desire to follow."

"You were supposed to bring Balance to the Force," she accused him. He grimaced.

"Ah, yes. _The Chosen One_. A myth Qui-Gon chose to believe and invest on a small boy," he said with restraint. "A tag that forever blighted me. An expectation that no one person could ever achieve. And the Jedi mythology and beliefs denied me the true salvation I needed-my heart and soul. Padme."

"Your wife," she murmured. He nodded.

"Balance is a very tricky thing to achieve," he told her. "It requires constant attention, constant adjustment, ever vigilant…on your own. But maybe they had it all wrong. I would achieve Balance eventually through my family…the family they sought to deny me in their fossilised outdated beliefs."

"I can agree with that," she muttered and he smiled.

"I see why Luke complained so much about you," he commented. Even dead, she felt her cheeks flush at the throwaway observation.

"Not a stellar example of a Jedi teacher himself," she retorted. He chuckled.

"You are exactly what my grandson needs," he told her more gently. "Both of you a mixture of light and dark, from opposing sides in the wars, both shaped by choices of others, by manipulation, by your strength and loneliness and vulnerability, by your determination and power. You naturally gravitate to the light and my grandson…maybe if he hadn't been seduced by darkness from his earliest years, he would have joined you. But together, you Balance light and darkness across your souls. _You_ are the Balance."

"And I am dead," she said bitterly.

"My grandson was right-you need to live," Anakin told her. "What you need to achieve this is in the remains of my Castle- _Darth Vader's_ castle-on Mustafar. The place you need to be to achieve the resurrection is Dathomir…"

"Where I was waiting…" Rey grumbled. "I spent most of my life waiting…and now the same thing is happening in my afterlife…"

"Snoke will be waiting," he warned the young women. She frowned.

"I thought…Palpatine created Snoke, that he was every voice in Ben's head, including Snoke's…"

"The Emperor created Snoke…but make no mistake, Rey-Snoke is a separate entity, a powerful Dark Side wielder in his own right. A malignant presence who will want to supplant you in rising once more. And the process makes it more dangerous."

"Why is that always the way?" she asked him quietly. Finally, he turned to face her.

"Every Skywalker has ultimately failed," he told her. "And your very existence and the future of balance in the Force depends on my grandson making the greatest sacrifice. He must give up himself, give up what he values most. And we Skywalkers tend to cling to our fear of loss and failure rather tightly." Looking into the handsome face, she managed a watery smile.

"I trust Ben," she said finally. "I trust him."

 _You love him,_ Anakin realised with sorrow. _I am sorry, child. No one should ask you to give up more…but if you are to live, you will have to surrender one last thing…_

"My grandson has already visited Mustafar to retrieve the Sith Wayfinder," he revealed. "Under the deepest part of the castle, there is an ancient Sith Holocron that details how you can be reunited." She nodded.

"I will find a way of telling him," she promised. "Thank you." Quietly, he unfolded his arms and took one of her hands in his.

"What you are asking is dangerous and very difficult," he reminded her.

"Which is what my entire life has been," she replied, a twinkle in her eyes. He sighed.

"Just remember that no story grants a happy ending for a Skywalker," he told her. "Ours is legacy of sorrow, of failure, of loss. Of bad choices, worse actions and ultimately winning while losing." There was a warning in his voice. "I do not doubt my grandson's bravery. Just…don't be disappointed if things end up different to what you hope." She frowned.

"Anakin?" she murmured. But he was gone, just the echo of his voice remaining.

_"_ _Enjoy the stars. And don't cling to hopes for the future. For a Skywalker, it never works out."_

-o0o-

He was trying to meditate but the guards were very distracting, the jab of the needle electrodes in his collar and binders aching as he shifted. He gritted his teeth, jaw muscles aching from the action and kept his eyes closed.

"How much do you think we'll get as our cut?" Mongur asked. The Crolute was the loudest and most obnoxious of the group, a being that filled any silence with the sounds of his own voice consistently. The humanoid next to him-Anachton-sighed.

"Five figures at least," he admitted, checking his blaster for the hundredth time and eyeing the prisoner with a jaundiced eye. "Biggest fish we've ever sold."

"Most dangerous," the insectoid Kl'i'ib added via his translator. He was the most alert of the guards and far and away the freest with the shocks. Ben consciously forced his hands to relax at the words, and tried to reach out of the Force, assessing if the creature was going to indulge his new favourite pastime. He had felt Rey briefly, just as they treated him to a demonstration of the higher power levels and concentrating on her light had helped him endure the abuse. A shiver ran through him as he lifted his chin slightly as the door opened and the tramp of feet sounded as more people marched in.

"We need to speak with the prisoner," a voice said, altered by a helmet vocoder. Ben stiffened because he recognised the tone, his concentration shattered again.

"Really?" Mongur sneered.

"Authorised by Ilios Dando," the voice said, handing over a token. There was a pause.

"We'll be over here," Anachton offered as the guards withdrew and Ben heard them draw back. Slowly, he opened his eyes and saw a tall shape swathed in a deep black cloak and cowl approach. A blank black mask stared back at him as the honour guard of stormtroopers snapped attention. Painfully slowly, the gloved hand lifted to remove the mask as the man leaned forward to peer into Ben's face. Pallid eyes stared back in a face that was so smug it was overbearing.

"I never thought I'd see the day when I finally got you in chains," he said.

"HUX!" The word spat from Ben's lips in shock and he felt a surge of anger and hatred run through him immediately. "I was told you were executed for treason." General Armitage Hux gave a thin but smug smile.

"Rumours of my death were greatly exaggerated," he commented disparagingly. "That fool Pryde that you promoted over me really had no concept of running the First Order. Or how the upper echelons are in open warfare with each other-just as Snoke liked it. I've been in open combat with you for _years_ , Ren! You think a single blaster shot would end me?"

"One can hope," Ben commented in his iciest voice. This man was really bringing out the Kylo in him without any real resistance on his part.

"And one would be a fool," Hux replied smugly. "I'm the technologist, the planner, the man who built Starkiller, who founded the child-Stormtrooper programme, the genius who created all our systems and advantages. You were just a rabid attack dog. Did you think that my uniform wasn't prepared and shielded to take that shot? Only my head was unprotected and Troopers are all trained from recruitment to shoot for the body! So when Pryde shot me, an alarm was triggered with my loyal officers and when my 'body' was collected, they took charge of me and I was transferred to my ship, _the Eliminator._ There I've been recuperating and waiting to see who won."

"That may have been a problem if Pryde and Palatine had triumphed," Ben told him coldly.

"And I would have found a way to integrate in their new 'Final Order'," Hux told him smugly. "If the Resistance won…well, I'm their friend. Their _spy_. I saved the current leaders of the Resistance from their execution almost at the cost of my own life! And finding you here? That is just the reward I deserve for everything I had to put up with from you!"

"You're ridiculous," Ben said flatly.

"So which one of us is chained and shackled, waiting to be auctioned to the highest bidder and which of us is here with loyal troops and access to the full wealth of the First Order?" Hux sneered. His eyes narrowed and he extended a hand. Ben scowled as one of the guards handed him an activator for the collar.

"You know I will get free and choke you to death," Ben growled, his eyes flashing darkly with hatred. Internally, he was shocked at how the sight of the man raised all those dark impulses that he had successfully quashed since Kef Bir. But Hux had been the pain in his side and fiercest rival since he joined Snoke, a man who had striven to undermine him, frame him, assassinate him, outmanoeuvre him…and who would have stabbed him in the back whenever he had the chance. Hux's eyes narrowed and he viciously twisted the dial then stabbed the button.

The current surged through Ben and he clamped his teeth together as his body arched in pain. It was definitely one of the higher settings as his vision greyed and his echoing hearing filled with the sounds of Hux chuckling. But the current scarified him for sadistically long and when he collapsed forward, he could still hear Hux laughing.

"That is definitely worth the price," the General commented coolly. Ben clenched his fists and tried to reach out with the Force.

"Y'never gonna get the chance…" he breathed as Hux caressed the button again. His low grunt of pain was involuntary but caused the General to smile as he hunkered down by the cell, tilting his head as he inspected the trembling prisoner.

"You imagine that the First Order didn't have insurance against any treason on your part-or that of your precious 'Knights of Ren'?" he taunted Ben, finally deactivating the current. "Supreme Leader Snoke himself approved my chemists' efforts in creating a superior serum to suppress the connections between your kind and the Force. We trialled the drugs on your precious Knights…and of course, we developed a much more potent version for you. So no, Ren-when you are my possession, you will be muzzled by drugs, shackled and collared and I am going to spend _years_ ensuring you understand exactly how offended I am by your very existence!"

"No," Ben growled. Hux leaned forward, his smile broader.

"Imagine what I will do to you," he breathed cruelly. "Because, no matter what the price, you are going to be mine, Ren." Gritting his teeth, Ben raised his head and glared.

"You spent so many years trying to get rid of me, trying to supplant me in Snoke's favour," he breathed. "Kind of ironic you want me back. Look forward to breaking your neck, Hux."

In a flash, the General rose and twitched the cowl back over his head. He spun on his heel and stalked for the door, tossing the activator to the guards once more.

"I think not," the General said coldly. "I rather imagine that I will be welcoming you to the Eliminator as my possession, my slave. A fitting end to your story." He paused. "And by the way, the auction starts in one hour."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I know this may have gone a little different to how you expected. There are a couple of things I wanted to note. 
> 
> 1] I didn't hate TROS, I just felt some of it was...sloppy. There probably was a really good film in there somewhere but some things were very 'blink and you miss it' and the pace meant that the chances to explore some characters or emotions more deeply were criminally wasted. .  
> 2] Hux was one issue. I mean, he was the big opponent of Ren within the FO for TFA and TLJ and suddenly he almost vanishes? I can understand he hated Ren enough to want to undermine him etc but the man who presided over a massive fascist rally before blowing away billions of beings on Starkiller Base wouldn't go down to a simple blaster shot! I am pretty sure he would have some sort of contingency and take 'precautions' against being assassinated...  
> 3] The Skywalker Saga if you think about it is a story of extremely powerful beings in the Force, some of whom make some really poor choices, don't deal well with family at all and all die sacrificing themselves for others. It's not a family story because this family is terribly dysfunctional and never gets any redemption or resolution and no one survives! That was my greatest disappointment with TROS because the hope would be 'TROS' meant one of them actually made it out alive and was finally given a chance at a better future.  
> 4] I have added additional tags to this story but be reassured. I am not JJ Abrams. If I decide to save someone, they WILL be saved. And PS-those of you who have not read my other works-I like happy endings.


	18. Eighteen

**Eighteen.**

"What d'ya mean, we can't see him?" Poe asked in exasperation. "He's ours!"

"I beg to differ," the heavyset humanoid sneered at him, his dark eyes and deeply tanned face mocking. "Possession is all of the law on D'Nolos. He is in our custody so he's ours."

"But this man is our agent, a man who is currently on a critical mission for the Resistance-and by doing this, you are siding against us!" Finn added, his fists clenched in exasperation. "Ilios Dando-we have to respectfully demand his release to our custody." The leader of the kidnappers-the Yanoj Free Traders, almost the most immoral and criminal gang in the Galaxy-pulled his thin lips into a leer, showing sharpened teeth.

"Good try but you'll have to bid for him like everyone else," Dando sneered, inspecting his grimy nails. Dressed in leather and studs, he was all business behind the steel desk. A bank of screens were playing behind him, showing markets, remote bids and personal messages from many of the potential bidders, all asking for a discount, favouritism, an edge… Finn felt his heart plummet, exactly understanding what they were facing.

"You broke into our ship and kidnapped him!" Poe protested.

"Did we mention he's actually one of our double agents?" Finn repeated, knowing now there was no chance of this grifter being reasonable.

"And you allowed the First Order to see him!" Rose put in suddenly, her eyes narrowing. Dando inspected her small shape as if she was some particularly nasty insect.

"Kylo Ren is their escaped traitor," he sneered.

"And they paid you well for the privilege," Rose realised before her eyes flashed in anger. "How much?"

"More than you can afford," Dando scoffed, looming over her. His mouth curled. "Unless you fancy some way of persuading me that there's something in it for me."

"Maybe the friendship of the Resistance-as opposed to our enmity?" Poe spoke up, his voice far calmer and less animated.

"Never heard of yer," Dando scoffed.

"You should," Rose told him. "We defeated the Final Order."

"Word was yer Jedi did that-and I don't see her here," Dando scorned.

"Our Jedi-and Ren," Poe insisted. "You don't want to be our enemy."

"I'll take my chances," Dando sneered. "Is that all? I'm a busy man." The leaders shared a look.

"Thank you for your time," Poe told him. "And be assured-our Jedi will have words with you." And with that, they stalked from the room. The little group walked along in silence until they reached the waiting others.

"What was that?" Finn asked as Poe ran his hands through his hair in exasperation.

"He's already decided who he's selling to," he explained.

"The First Order," Rose realised.

"So we have to be ready to act when it all goes down," Poe told her. "And for the record, when we get Rey back, I'm gonna her ask her to come here and trash this place." Rose stared at him in shock, her brows furrowing.

"You really believe that is possible?" she asked him directly, her tone still suspicious. Poe nodded.

"A lot has gone on that we haven't really gone into-but Ren has delivered," he explained. "And he delivered, _every_ time we needed him to. He believes he can get her back. He's determined. I think…" And then he shook his head. "No, that's not right. He knows she is there-and she needs him. If there is any chance, we have to do whatever we can."

"You mean, we have to break him out from the middle of an auction in front of half the Galaxy?" Zorii asked them. "Ya think we can do this, flyboy?"

"I don't think anyone thought defeating the Final Order was possible either," Finn put in.

"But we improvised around it and got the job done," Jannah added. "So what's the plan?" Poe and Finn frowned but Rose gave them a stern look.

"If we're really doing this, then Beau and I will be our bidding team up in the stands while the rest of you find a way of getting Ren away," she said. "Take the Falcon and head directly to where you need to be. We'll field any questions here and head back to the Base. And tell Rey I love her and want her back too." Finn grabbed her shoulder and gave her a smile.

"Thanks," he breathed as they dived into the throng, rapidly heading to the imposing black stone arena that was the main slave market of D'Nolos.

-o0o-

It was like a prickle in the back of his head, not so much the sudden absence of sound as the gentle muting of the already muted sounds. But as he looked up, he knew he would see her.

What he wasn't expecting was to see another at her side, a tall relatively young male Jedi in old fashioned cream and tan robes with a stern expression and a familiarity that nagged somewhere at the back of his memory.

"Ben!" He swallowed. Her voice was worried, urgent even and she raced forward, her translucent shape crouching by him. He forced himself to smile, a weary expression that didn't reflect how he was feeling.

"Rey," he managed as his eyes drifted to the stranger. He was aware he had never seen a real Force Ghost-because he hadn't earned that right. Somehow, Rey had earned that during her training and had seen Luke-he had sensed the flash of his presence through their bond as he had raced towards Exegol. But Ben had been mired in darkness for so long and Sith didn't appear as Force Ghosts so he was shocked that Rey was looking…like this. It caused a shard of ice to stab his heart, hammering it home that perhaps, this was all for nothing. Perhaps it was too late and the Force had accepted her, meaning she was beyond resurrection. Maybe, while dealing with all of the consequences of his own crimes, he had lost the chance to atone a little by giving her the chance of life she deserved. Maybe he truly was alone.

And then her concern flooded his mind through their bond, her warmth and light chasing away the shadows and the grim, dark thoughts that whispered that he should give up now and return to the darkness where he belonged. That his attempts at redemption were vanity and a fantasy to soothe the guilt that everyone he had ever professed to care for had died for him. That he was death, poison, an anathema to life and only deserved misery and pain and torture and death…

"BEN!" Her insubstantial hands rested on his cheeks and he wondered how he could feel them when she wasn't there. She sighed. "Ben-focus on me," she breathed. "I can feel the darkness." He blinked and then closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. "I-I just…I mean…" He took a deep breath. "Are you okay?" She gave a small chuckle.

"Considering I'm dead-yeah, I'm just great," she teased him and then she looked up. "Ben-this is Anakin Skywalker…"

"My grandfather," he mouthed. The Jedi looked at him and quirked an eyebrow.

"At least you didn't die immediately after renouncing the Dark Side," he commented wryly. "That, at least, is a step in the right direction for the family." Lifting his shackled wrists, Ben scowled at the ghost.

"Yeah, we're really making great progress," he commented sarcastically. "Only another fifty kriffing generations before one of us actually gets to live a normal happy life."

"Well, that would be down to you, kid, since you are the last Skywalker," Anakin reminded him. His shoulders sagged.

"Then we're doomed-because I cannot see any way out of this," he admitted.

"The others are here," Rey told him. "They will help. I have faith in them. And in you. I know you can do this." Guilt curled in his stomach because he had been doing a pretty poor job so far. She glanced over to the former Sith Lord.

"You need to head to Mustafar," Anakin told him. "The ruins of Castle Vader hold the key. In the very bowels of the castle, where the gateway to the Dark used to exist, there is a vault which houses an ancient Sith holocron."

"Pertaining to resurrection?" Ben asked dryly, his eyes fixated on the ghost of his grandsire. Anakin nodded.

"Palpatine told you that the Sith had access to technologies and knowledge, some of which would be considered unnatural…" he reminded his grandson.

_Images of the dark, gloomy temple, cold blue luminescent light lightening the smothering darkness enough to outline the rough hewn walls, the jagged throne, the enormous statues, the scientific equipment. A tank of Snokes, floating sightlessly. Weapons. And the machine, dangling the rotting corpse that moved despite greying, putrescent flesh and milky sightless eyes, the half-rotted features thrown into sharp relief by the ceaseless lightning…_

"Are you sure he's gone?" he asked. "Please promise me he's gone…"

"The Emperor and the Sith are annihilated, finally," Anakin confirmed. "Rey, the last Jedi, is dead. All is balanced. But darkness and light still exist and your battle between them is the most intense because you suffered in the dark for so long. You used the dark, clung to it like a friend, used it to escape your pain and shield you from your loneliness."

"But I was still in pain. I was still lonely. More than ever."

Rey blinked at his honest words and he instinctively raised his hand to touch her insubstantial face. He could feel her distress through the Bond.

"It's okay," he sighed. "I accepted it. I thought there was no other choice. My mind was groomed, primed to allow Snoke to use me as his tool. I welcomed it because it was a kind of belonging. I thought I was in charge of my destiny. But all I did was serve a crueller master and sink deeper and deeper into the night." He took a slow breath. "I heard your voice." Anakin quirked an eyebrow and folded his arms. "At least I thought I did. In truth, it was Palpatine. Everything I believed in was wrong. And I committed terrible crimes in the name of that belief. And I still sometimes hear the whispers, generated by my own mind, trying to tempt me back." His fists clenched. "I don't want to go back. Force, please don't let me go back. Anything but that."

"I couldn't reach you while you were shrouded in Darkness," Anakin told him. "No one could reach you-until you made the decision to allow glimmers of light back in. To allow Rey in. She was your salvation, the only voice you needed. Not the voice of a dead Sith Lord who would have warned you that repeating my mistakes, following my damned path would never lead you to the release and salvation you sought. You craved the light, kid-and Snoke perverted that and made you a creature of darkness. You were lonely and he isolated you more. You were hurting and he tormented you. I was never the voice you needed."

"But I need you now," he breathed.

"Mustafar,"Anakin repeated. "I can't go there now. Neither can Rey. She will be waiting on Dathomir. You are the only one who can save her."

"And who will save me?" Ben asked as they started to fade. The door swung open and his guards marched in.

"Your friends," Anakin said. "And yourself."

"I have faith in you, Ben," Rey told him, her eyes lingering for a long moment. Warmth flooded down the bond. "No one is stronger than you. And I believe nothing will stop you when you begin on this quest."

He rose to his feet, staring into the empty space.

"I wish I believed in me as much as you did," he muttered as the the familiar shapes of his guards closed round him and his arms were grabbed.

"Showtime," Mongur sneered, his hand digging hard into Ben's bicep. Another four unfamiliar cowled guards had joined the party and he was jostled and hustled along a relatively short stone passage and out into a gritty arena. The cloudy sky formed a white-grey bland arch overhead as the black stone walls of the arena surrounded him, banks of seating crammed with buyers and screens decorating both sides, displaying his vital statistics in humiliating detail. His guards stepped back but still covered him as he scanned the stands, seeking Finn, Poe…even Chewie. But all he could sense was concern from the young woman wearing the Resistance tag on her cloak…Rose?…and an anxious-looking young man at her side. Disappointment bubbled in his throat and he felt a sour taste of betrayal. They had abandoned him again. Sooner of later, everyone abandoned him.

"And now the clock has ticked to the appointed time and we are present for the most eagerly anticipated auction in the history of the Galaxy!" Ilios Dando announced. His image filled the screens and his voice boomed round the arena, amplified to the point of distortion. He grinned and his arm swung out expansively. "Welcome, friends," he added and then his finger stabbed at the lone shape in the centre of the arena.

"Today we come to buy a single lot. This lot. Humanoid male, thirty standard years. Detailed biometric analysis has been circulated to all those who requested it and has been displayed on the boards. Known as Kylo Ren. Also known as Ben Solo. Also known as Ben Organa." Ben quirked an eyebrow: he had never, to his knowledge, ever taken his mother's name. "Also known as the Jedi Killer. Also known as the Master of the Knights of Ren. Also known as the Supreme Leader of the First Order. Also known as a traitor, a murderer, a genocide. Also known as a former Jedi Padawan. Now meat to be purchased."

"Objection!"

Silence fell over the arena as every eye turned to Rose, who had activated her microphone and was standing stiff and furious, her eyes sparkling with anger. The uncertainty was gone, replaced with white-hot rage.

"What?" Dando asked, his eyes suddenly perplexed and irritated that he had been thrown out of his flow. But Rose was the young woman who had started as a mechanic and loyal sister and who had stood up for what she believed to become a Resistance Leader.

"I object. To this whole concept-that you can sell anyone as a slave-because slavery was outlawed by the Republic, the Empire, the New Republic, the First Order and the Council of the Resistance! This is a core world and as such, this whole auction is illegal!"

"You can always go," Dando hissed, gesturing to the other buyers. "No one asked you to be here.".

"Or you can face up to the fact you have kidnapped a valued Resistance officer and are attempting to sell him to enemies who want to murder him!" Rose repeated, her voice durasteel hard. "A man who was safely within one of our vessels seeking supplies in a neutral port when he was brutally kidnapped. A man whose actions saved this Galaxy and ended the Emperor. A man who is the son of General Leia Organa-Solo and who accepted this most dangerous of missions."

Ben bowed his head, trying not to flinch. Almost everything she had said was wrong but he could sense her anger at the whole situation. A flash of memory treacherously reared its head and he recalled the glimpse of a medallion around her neck, the aura of sadness about her as she unconsciously touched it.

_She lost someone to them in the war._

_She had been a slave or seen slaves up close and hated the whole idea of slavery._

_He couldn't argue with her on that one._

"So I am asking you very nicely to return him to us right now and we can all move forward legally and reasonably," she said sternly. Dando stared at her-then laughed out loud. There was a ripple of laughter that ran around the arena.

"I'm afraid all my esteemed guests and friends would be very disappointed!" he scoffed. "You've said your piece. Now let the rest of us get on with the business of the day…"

Ben inclined his head, hearing soft sounds behind him. The new guards had hauled back his usual guards, who had been loitering in the shady alcove at the entrance of the arena, while every eye had been on Rose. He frowned, hearing muffled thuds, cussing and then the muffled sound of a blaster had him flinching. Then the four new guards flanked him and one reached out, resting a hand on his arm. He shook the man off, his face closing.

"Easy, Ren," the familiar low voice of Poe murmured. "Play along."

"You okay?" Finn added.

"What do you kriffing think?" Ben growled, unable to stop himself.

"You look like shit," Finn told him bluntly.

"There you go," Ben muttered. "Do you actually have a plan?"

There was a click and his shackles opened very slightly.

"Yup," Poe murmured. "Be ready to help out and do something useful when we get the signal."

"No one asked you to come," Ben found himself saying ungraciously.

"Nah-but letting these people get their hands on you would betray what we stood for," Finn reminded him. "And Rey would expect us to help you."

"Shall we start at a million?" Dando roared over the PA. There was silence. "I see none of you are willing to show your hands but if you're not even willing to even start at a meagre million that will scarcely over my expenses, I may as well just hand him over the the Resistance…"

"ONE MILLION!" a voice precisely enunciated. There was a sigh as Dando grinned.

"A million it is!" he announced as Finn and Poe peered round Ben.

"Is that General Hugs?" the former pilot asked as Ben sighed.

"Yup. He's harder to get rid of than a case of Corellian Clap," he shot back.

"Not what I expected," Zorii murmured to Jannah as the two women took up station to the side. "Got a mouth on him like an old-time smuggler."

"Ten million!"

"Well, he's got them going now," Finn murmured.

"Forty!"

"Fifty!"

"Sixty!"

"General Hugs really really wants you," Poe murmured.

"Yeah, he said as much," Ben muttered. Tilting his head, Poe inspected him, his dark eyes sweeping over the tall shape of the former Supreme Leader with a calculating expression.

"You two got a thing going?" he asked. "You know a personal relationship sort of…"

"No."

"I guess I'm meaning more of a sexual sort of…"

"NO!"

"Because, well, I've obviously got nothing against anything like…"

"NO!"

"I mean, you guys have worked together for really long and what with the First Order being a bit…"

"What part of 'No' don't you understand?" Ben snapped. "Hux is an ass who has tried for years to undermine me, sideline me, even assassinate me. We competed for Snoke's favour and supremacy. I won. He lost. Now he wants to get his revenge."

"You know he was our spy?" Finn put in, glancing around. Many of the bidders had dropped out and were watching the handful of bidders left-all representing the less legal groupings wanting to get their hands on Kylo Ren…and, of course, the First Order.

"I'd gathered," Ben admitted.

"Though he admitted he didn't care if we won as long as you lost," Finn continued and he looked at Ben.

"Figures," he said.

"FOUR HUNDRED MILLION!" Hux's voice was sounding a little ragged. The representative of the Hutts, a vile bloated creature which smelled so bad there were three rows vacant all around him finally flicked his tail in disgust and dropped his hand. Dando glanced around at the muttering crowd.

"Any more offers?" he asked.

There was silence as Hux drew himself up.

"Sold to General Hux of the First Order for Four Hundred Million credits!" Dando announced.

"And that is our cue to leave," Poe murmured as he pulled Ben back. "I hope you're ready for this."

"Dameron-what the kriff is that supposed to mean?" Ben growled.

"Fetch my slave!" Hux announced as several of his Stormtroopers emerged from the gates at the opposite side of the arena. As one, the 'guards' all fired at them while the remaining Resistance members in the audience joined in and cut down the nearest couple of stormtroopers. There were screams and the sudden stampede of bidders running for cover which enabled Rose and Beau to scramble for cover. Dando dived for safety as he screamed for his own men to restore order while the stormtroopers lined up and as one, blasted at the pinned down would-be escapees. The others dived for cover but Ben reacted, eyes narrowing and hand flinging up to freeze the blaster bolts in the air. He was trembling with the effort, sweat standing out on his pale brow.

"If you wanna move…anytime would be good," he managed through gritted teeth. "Or shoot them. "Really 'm not fussy…" Zorii and Jannah immediately started blasting at the stormtroopers, followed instants later by Poe and Finn before Ben shoved the blasts back and watched them explode around the men who had fired them. The shackles fell from his wrists but he groaned as the current surged through his collar, activated by a cruel hand. Ben's mind immediately supplied the image of Hux, playing with his new favourite toy. Rose and Beau burst into the arena, ducking blasts from the pursuing stormtroopers. Without missing a beat, they accelerated over the bodies of the troopers Ben had taken down and fired over their shoulders, rapidly being followed by more white-armoured shapes as well as more of Dando's guards as Hux's frustrated screams sounded over the chaos.

"SHOOT THEM! GET MY PRISONER BACK!"

"You okay?" A dark-skinned woman leaned towards the sagging former Supreme Leader, her eyes professional and Ben glanced up.

"Be better if this thing was off," he murmured, gingerly touching the collar. A couple of trickles of blood seeped from under the rough metal. Then he stiffened again, his muscles tensed and he grunted in pain as a further surge of electricity ripped through him. "And soon."

"Any time?" Poe shouted into his comm as he fired back at the approaching guards and ducked down. In response, a familiar ship zoomed over the bank of seats, shielding the defenders from the raging maelstrom of blaster fire. The Millennium Falcon came in for a fast landing, engines still full on and ready to lift off. The ramp was down and the little band of defenders sprinted onto the old freighter, Ben and Jannah last. A blaster almost clipped his leg and he unconsciously deflected more shots as the current surged again. Then the ramp closed and he collapsed to his knees as the ship accelerated up. Everyone was thrown around the corridor.

"Poe-can you please start driving?" Finn yelled as they swooped over the city. Guns exploded around them and as they all started to straighten up, proximity alerts sounded.

"What's that?" Jannah asked as Rose scrambled over to Ben. The two women hauled him to the bank of seats by the chess table and Rose immediately started inspecting the collar.

"First Order Star Destroyer on intercept course," Poe reported, sliding into the pilot's seat as Chewie moved over. Finn and Zorii took the guns and prepared to fight their way out. Rose was frowning.

"I knew I should have choked Hux when I had the chance," Ben muttered.

"Exactly what we don't want you doing…Ben Solo," Rose murmured as Ben stared at her. "Hold still," she added, fiddling the collar.

"Thanks," he said after an awkward pause. Her eyes flicked up for a second.

"For what?"

"Helping," he admitted awkwardly. "I know you would rather have left me." She lowered the probe she was using and looked at him.

"No," she said. "Look, I hate everything you have done, everything you represent, everything you have supported…but I hate slavery more. And my friends were right. No matter who you are and what you have done, you deserve be treated the same as everyone else." She fiddled again at the collar and then sighed. There was a click and she gently removed the collar. He took a relieved breath and then looked down into her dark eyes.

"Thank you," he said simply. She rested the collar on the desk, dropping it as if it scorched her. There was no fear in her eyes as she faced him, reading his face carefully. She imagined she would be more alarmed facing Kylo Ren…but she understood what Poe and Finn meant: there was no malignancy hanging around this man. He was still big and imposing physically but there was a subdued sensation that made her feel…sad. As if something was missing and he was merely existing, not quite living. She chewed her lip. Her head wanted to scream at him for everything he had done but one on one, her heart reminded her…that he was still human. He needed to pay and make reparations for his sins…but allowing his execution or being tortured or enslaved made them no better than the First Order. She sighed.

"Rey was one of my closest friends…and if you think you can get her back…then that should be your penance," Rose told him sternly. "Whatever it takes, whatever you have to do-I want her back." There was just the faintest hint of a smile as he heard her words.

"That's something we both agree on," he told her. The ship shook.

"Hang on!" Poe yelled. "We got company."

"HUX," he growled, feeling the approach of the enormous StarDestroyer. He winced as a bracket of shots from the ventral and dorsal guns exploded far too close. The shapes of TIEs dodged around them, exchanging fire with Finn and Zorii. A desire to help, to fight for himself jerked him to his feet as they slammed sideways. He hung onto the table, almost losing his balance. The raw fury of Hux was discernible across the Force, frustrated beyond all reckoning: somehow, it made him feel a hundred times better.

A TIE fighter exploded just off the port hull, the death of the pilot causing him to wince.

And then they shot into hyperspace.

"They're going to follow, aren't they?" Rose asked. He nodded, heading for the cockpit.

"Hux just paid four hundred million credits so he could gloat over me for years and torture me to death…eventually…" he reminded her. "Of course he's annoyed. He's not giving up."

"And a number of the rest won't as well," Jannah commented, following him to the cockpit.

"Did we just make ourselves fugitives?" Beau asked, listening to the chatter on the comm. "Because it kind of sounds like we just did…"

"Good to be popular," Poe teased him. Ben scowled as he stared at the elongated star trails all around them. He could sense it: time was running out. The image of Rey as a Force Ghost, irrevocably lost to him, surged urgency through his exhausted body.

"Set a course for Mustafar," he said.


	19. Nineteen

**Nineteen.**

The planet Mustafar glowed in the inky night, the lava flows forming throbbing orange scars on the planet's surface, reminding him of the joins in the last iteration of his helmet, discarded in his Silencer before he faced Rey that last time on Kef Bir. And of the scar she had given him as she had bested him in that snowy wood on Starkiller. Unconsciously, he touched his right cheek, feeling the unmarked flesh and recalling the searing instant when she had slashed him across the face and shown him that she was a power to be reckoned with. Even amid the collapse of the planet, all he could think of was her.

Last time he had come here, he was too distracted, too focussed to just stare at the orb as he approached, marvelling in the unique beauty of the world. Instead, he had been feverishly reading intelligence reports and meditating, clearing his mind of all distractions except his fury and determination to crush any opposition to his rule. He sighed. After killing Snoke and losing Rey on Crait, he had been single-minded for a period of time, utterly convinced that his vision of the future was correct. That she would turn and come to realise that her destiny was to rule the Galaxy at his side. But the Darkness had been so strong, so all-pervasive that he had never realised how desperate he truly was. Every time he repeated the mantra was to convince himself. He had been a pretty good actor, he acknowledged, because his return to the monster had been spectacular and had succeeded in quelling all overt opposition in his ranks and in crushing opposition.

He walked to the cockpit and found the Generals bickering. In fact, everyone had been bickering. Tamini had emerged from the cabin to treat his wounds, shot an enormous tirade of pretty impressive cussing at him and then had locked herself back in because they hadn't turned round to take her back to Kineva. In addition, Zorii had been exceptionally pissed when she had realised that her ship was stranded on D'Nolos along with the rebel ship and it had taken Rose and Jannah a lot of calming down to stop her punching Poe and seizing control of the _Falcon_. And then Rose had needed to contact D'Acy and Kaydel to organise pilots to collect both ships from the planet while everyone had blamed each other for the catastrophic plan.

 _And tacitly blamed Ben for everything_.

"Looks like a pretty hostile place," Finn commented as he slid into a seat.

"Are those lava flows?" Poe asked, checking the screens for a thousandth time.

"Yes," Ben admitted. "Though last time I was here, I was the most dangerous thing on the planet." They stared at him. "I came here to find the Sith Wayfinder from Darth Vader's castle."

"I presume you succeeded," Finn put in.

"Yeah," he admitted. "I found Exegol, didn't I?"

_And I slaughtered the entire membership of a Cult of Vader who tried to protect the Castle from me. Dozens dead-all by my hand. And all I can recall is red rage, fire and blood. The screams, the hiss and spit of my saber, the exultant feeling as I thrust the blade through body after body, the smell of burning meat, the coppery scent of blood, the sudden silence as the last one fell. My breaths, harsh amid the silence and the approaching tramp of the Stormtroopers, slowly catching me up…_

"Yeah…that really worked out great," Poe muttered, unable to help himself. But Ben found himself smiling very slightly at the pilot-turned-General's comment. Poe Dameron, the best pilot in the Resistance, had shown no fear or uncertainty when he had been captured by the First Order and he remained confident and smart-mouthed now.

"Not so much for the First Order or the Emperor," Ben murmured. "Or Rey."

He closed his eyes, the images sleeting through his memory.

_…_ _running across the uneven ground of Exegol, under the floating monolith, hearing her in danger, feeling her despair and anger and resignation as she faced the foul malevolent pit in the Force that was Palpatine…_

_…_ _launching himself into the abyss, angling his body to hit the massive chain and impacting so hard his body jarred down to his bones…_

_…_ _sprinting through the Temple, trading shots with the defenders, feeling freer than he had for years, fighting for once with a clear mind and whole heart, not conflicted or ambivalent any more…_

_…_ _surrounded by the Knights of Ren, fighting with everything he had to get to her, to protect her and help her end the foul presence that was radiating the smothering Dark. Losing, being beaten and bloodied, dropping to his knees, their bodies closing on him, their weapons raised to end their traitorous fallen master…_

_…_ _feeling her brilliant light through the Bond, feeling the assuredness of the plan, the single-minded trust, the brush of her hand on his as she handed off the lightsaber and the gentle brush of her psyche against his…._

**_I'm glad you're here._ **

_…_ _seeing them all take a pace back as he brought the saber from behind his back. Feeling the surge of triumph that zinged through his veins at the smell of their fear. Armed with a blaster, he was dead meat. Armed with a lightsaber, they were dead. And he had proven that, ripping through them all with the skills that he had won over years, a walking army filled with the Force and bloodlust and so much brutal determination. Impaling the last one and ending the final Sith Guard to get to her side…_

_…_ _scarified by the Dark Lord, sabers flying from their hands as they writhed in the lightning. Sucked almost dry by the monster as he fed of their Bond, their life force to regenerate his rotting corpse and stand before them once more. Falling into darkness, his existence flickering uncertainly on the blink of oblivion…but knowing that she was there, mere inches away…so he hung on. He hung on…_

_…_ _waking first and being tossed aside like a piece of trash by Palpatine. Flying away from her unconscious shape, impacting on the rocks and falling, falling…_

_…_ _lying there in pain, dying. Feeling her call, her despair and sorrow…_

**_Be with me. Be with me._ **

_…_ _and feeling them finally come. Knowing she heard what he never had: the voices of the previous Jedi, sustaining and nurturing her. Knowing they would support her when he could not. When he had been inadequate…_

**_I am all the Sith!_ **

**_And I…am all the Jedi._ **

_…_ _the explosion, searing the Sith from existence finally. The sudden lightening of the oppression of the Darkness. The scents of cooked meat and decay and dust. The gentle flicker of the light. Then silence. An almost silent sound as she fell. And nothing at the other end of the Bond…_

_…_ _climbing, despite his fearsome injuries. He would have ripped the remains of his body apart to be with her. Because she needed him and he needed her. He had discarded everything to be with her. She was his soul…and now he was torn in two. Scrambling over the uneven, shattered ground. Seeing her lying there. Cradling her lifeless form in his arms, feeling his heart shatter at the sight of her grey lips, her sightless eyes. Knowing he would never see that smile again…_

_…_ _failing her one final time…_

"Ren?"

He was on his knees tears flowing freely down his face, his hands fisted against his chest. He couldn't breathe, couldn't do anything except see her die, over and over. And then, there were hands on his shoulder, gentle touches that were nothing like anything he had felt before. Someone was crouching at his side, an arm flung awkwardly across his shoulders and a hand kindly rubbing his back.

"It's okay."

 _Rose? Could this get any worse?_ But she was leaning close and murmuring reassurances and she was being kind to him which just made him feel like he wished the ground would swallow him up. He swallowed and struggled to breathe, forcing the images away and pressing his fists to his face to try to hide his eyes, though his choking, sobbing breaths were loud in the quiet compartment.

"Why?" he rasped.

"You were thinking of her, weren't you?"

It wasn't really a question and he shamefully nodded.

"Whatever the Bond you had, it went beyond simple communication, didn't it."

He nodded again, slowly mastering his breathing.

"I could feel her thoughts, her emotions, her light…"

"Did you love her?"

Rose's voice was soft and he looked up into her dark eyes. Slowly, he nodded.

"Yes." Then he gave a bitter laugh. "The Dark Side is all about anger and hatred but in the end, I'm brought down by her light. Her kindness. Her love. And I…I dreamed and hoped and for an instant, as we stood side by side, sabers raised as we faced the Emperor, I felt a kind of peace because I was where I wanted to be, at her side, as one…" He swallowed again and swiped his face dry with his sleeve. "And I would have given my life to bring her back because she deserves life so much more than I do. I had it all-a family, a home, people who cared- and I allowed them to be destroyed. I destroyed them myself. She had nothing but she rose above it and forged a new life by doing the right thing. Against me." Rose gently got up and inspected him, then offered him her hand. He allowed her to pull him to his feet.

"I told Finn that we wouldn't win by destroying what we hated but by saving what we loved," she told him. "That was what Rey did, wasn't it? She did it all to save us. she fought the Emperor, gave her life…for us."

He nodded.

"And you are doing this to save her. The woman you love, who you are linked to by some weird bond I can't begin to understand…" He managed a wan smile.

"I think you've demonstrated pretty astute understanding of what we are," he said quietly. "And what I am." Rose gave a sigh.

"You cannot change the past," she told him and he felt his heart sink. "But you can change the future. You can change the person you are, the person who faces that future. You can change what you do. You can do everything in your power to correct the mistakes of the past and make reparation."

"How can you forgive the unforgivable?" he asked her quietly. She wrapped her arms around herself and her eyes unfocussed.

"Do the impossible," she murmured. "No one can bring my sister back. No one can restore Paige to life. But Rey…if that is even possible, then it is something you have to try. And I will do everything I can to help you."

His eyes widened, feeling the aura around the young woman facing him. She wasn't Force sensitive but she glowed with the same light that had blinded him in the presence of Rey. Hardened by battle and tinged by loss and sorrows, she was still essentially all light. Quietly, he slid onto the seat and looked up into her face.

"Tell me about Paige…please?" he asked her softly. Her eyes widened and for a moment, he wondered if she would yell at him that it wasn't her business, that he was the reason she was dead, that he didn't deserve to know. But instead, she sat opposite him and gave a brilliant smile, her eyes glowing with love. And then she began to speak.

-o0o-

The landing was hard, the heated winds battering the Millennium Falcon as they found a suitable landing site amid the iron-hard trees. Shaken and not at all embarrassed, Poe closed down the engines and glanced at the crew as he walked into the main crew quarters.

"So how's this gonna go?" he asked, looking at the assembled passengers. Ben was standing to one side, his gaze flicking over the others. The moment they had entered Mustafar's atmosphere, he had gone quiet, the incessant buzzing of the Dark growing louder and louder in his head.

"I'll go in alone," Ben said immediately. There were cries of protest.

"No way!" Finn snapped.

"Absolutely not!" Poe added.

"I'm coming with you," Rose added.

"Ya think we're leading Kylo Ren out of our sight after everything we did to get you back?" Zorii added. He gritted his teeth, hearing Chewie add his protest.

"Not happening," Jannah added while Beau shook his head.

"Gotta be kidding," he added. "Leaving you alone of a planet where you could contact your allies or get your hands on Sith weapons…"

"Mustafar is a Dark locus," he said shortly, trying to explain while suppressing the whispers in his head. "There are things here that are dangerous."

"Apart from you," Finn snarked. The former stormtrooper's mood had changed and he wondered if the man knew he was Force-sensitive…or if he understood that made him far more vulnerable in this place.

"You shouldn't go," he told Finn and he felt the flare of anger.

"I don't-and neither do you," the dark-skinned man snapped. Ben stamped down on his rising temper.

"Finn," he growled through gritted teeth. "You are Force sensitive. This place reeks of darkness. You don't have the shields or the experience to filter the Dark Side out. It could smother you."

"And you? Won't you just go back to the Dark?" Jannah asked sharply. He winced.

"I…have a lot more experience in resisting the Darkness," he explained grudgingly.

"Yeah-you were doing such a great job of it up 'til the time Rey kicked your ass," Finn snarked. Fists balling, Ben lurched forward a step and found Poe and Zorii had levelled their blasters at him. Instinctively, he flung his hand up and slammed them back against the walls, the weapons flying from their numbed hands.

"This place…preys on your fears and insecurities…" he growled. "Every slight or injustice you have felt is magnified. You have to keep a clear head just to walk through here unscathed. I can do that because I spent years under Snoke's tutelage and I never fully accepted the Darkness…though I wanted to. But the doubts I had, that last tiny ember of Light saved me. And now I have a purpose, to save Rey. I can do this. But I cannot if you all want to shoot me in the back on the trip. STAY HERE!" He gestured and Poe's blaster flew into his hand, even as he sprinted for the ramp. Leaping down as the exit lowered, he was out of the ship and running across the uneven ground even before they could respond.

"ENOUGH!" Rose snapped, glaring at everyone. Most of them had weapons in their hands and almost everyone had turned to start the chase. "Enough! Everyone take a break and sit down. That's an order!"

"I'm pretty sure a General out-ranks a Commander," Finn growled at her as her eyes widened.

"And I'm pretty sure the Finn I know wouldn't ever dare to say that!" she snapped, looking over at Poe. The Pilot-turned-General was eyeing his fellow General with a very thoughtful expression.

"Buddy-what are you feeling?' he asked calmly, seeing Finn rigid with anger.

"That I want to get my hands on that treacherous bastard and watch him die slowly and painfully," Finn said in a cold voice.

"And Rey?"

"Rey's dead," Finn told him, slowly turning back to face his friend. "Ren killed her…"

"You know, I think he may be right," the former pilot sighed. "Finn-you were the one who persuaded us to help Ren. You were the one who got him off Ajan Kloss. You were the one who insisted that if there was any way we could get Rey back, we had to try."

"You know what he's done? How many people he killed on his own? And how many more he ordered murdered?" he spat.

"No," Rose murmured. "And here and now, that doesn't even matter."

"It should," Finn snarled. "Just outside this ship, there are bodies strewn all over the ground. Dozens and dozens. And pretty much all of them died on his lightsaber. And you say it doesn't matter?"

"Rey matters," Rose insisted. "And he knows what he's looking for."

"We have to get him back!" Finn insisted.

"And we will, buddy," Poe told him. "But we need to choose who goes…"

"And it can't be you," Jannah sighed, popping up behind him and jabbing an injection deep into his neck. His eyes widened and he collapsed to the ground. She sighed. "He'll wake with a bad head and probably even more grumpy," she explained, shrugging her shoulders. "I'll stay with him."

"Rose, Chewie and I will go," Poe decided.

"And me," Zorii insisted.

"And Zorii. And also BB8," he decided. "Then at least one of us will be immune to whatever got in his head. I need a blaster and then we need to get out there. Jannah, Beau-can you make sure the ship is ready to leave at a moment's notice? This place gives me the creeps." Beau handed him a comm.

"Keep in touch," he advised the General. "And we'll watch Finn. Now go!" Weapons gathered, they sped down the ramp and out into a bleak forest, the trees skeletal and scorched, the ground uneven and blackish grey from cooled lava flows. Detritus was strewn around, slightly softening the desolate lines of the terrain. Ahead, just visible amid the trees, there was the black outline of a fortress, halt-tumbled and ruined. Poe jerked his head.

"That's our direction," he decided as they trotted forward, BB8 rolling gamely along, his little beeps the only sounds in the dead environment. But it was when they topped the rise that they met the horror that Finn had described. There were a couple of fallen stormtroopers, discarded like the insignificant cogs in the First Order machine that they were considered-but far outnumbering them were others. Defenders. Rose felt her eyes trailing over the corpses, partially rotted amid the sulphurous fumes of the planet. All were cut down with slashes, the edges charred by the energy of a lightsaber. Several had been impaled, the holes seared shut. Others were decapitated or hacked apart. Every death was violent and brutal, evidence of a warrior expending his rage and hatred in every stroke. And the bodies stretched on and on, over the rise and into the next little valley.

Rose gasped, her mind sliding back to the man she had comforted, a man who had been broken by loss and pain and a broken heart. The dichotomy was stark and she realised that this was what Rey had tried to explain to her before: the slaughter before her was the work of Kylo Ren…but the broken-hearted man she had gently hugged on the _Millennium Falcon_ was Ben Solo.

A blaster shot sounded up ahead-and then another. There were yells and shouts and the group shared the shortest of glances before they accelerated over the next small rise into another shallow valley-to find Ben facing a couple of dozen shapes wrapped in dark robes who looked uncannily like those worn by the corpses behind them. Dashing in, the group fired on the robed shapes, ducking returning fire and hunkering down behind the iron-hard trees. There was scant other cover and they heard Ben mutter a soft curse.

"Damned cultists." Poe looked up and stuffed his hand in his bag, feeling the heavy metal shape within. He had taken it from Finn's berth as he collected another blaster, hating himself but knowing it was of use to only one person. Closing his hand on the weapon, he pulled it out.

"REN!" he shouted and threw the lightsaber. An arm shot up and his hand closed on the cool metal, thumbing the activator with practice. The blue blade hummed into life as Ben felt the surge of energy flow through him, the urge for battle singing in his blood. Leaning forward, balanced perfectly with the blade pointed directly forward and the blaster in his other hand, his eyes narrowed as he looked along the blade and the corner of his mouth turned up a fraction.

To the watching others, it seemed as if Kylo Ren had suddenly come back to life. The shape and movements were eerily familiar from the battle against Luke Skywalker they had witnessed outside the base on Crait, the motions purposeful and powerful, the certainty back. As one, the strangers attacked, coming at Ben from all sides. Frozen, they watched as the lightsaber swept round, taking two out immediately, their dying shapes seared with the cut of the energy blade. Ben blasted two with his blaster before slamming another back, flying to impact into a trunk behind the others.

"Any time you wanna join in, feel free," Ben grunted, snapping them out of their shock. Poe shot the nearest attacking shape and nodded.

"Come on!" he yelled and launched into the battle. Ducking down, the foursome fired fiercely at the attackers, clearing a path between themselves and the looming ruins ahead. Ben was a swirling, powerful one-man battalion, slamming the defenders aside, deflecting blaster shots with the saber or with his hand. Zorii ducked and fired, the blast a few feet to Ben's side. He spun, his eyes narrowing and his blaster swung up, the shot missing her by a whisker. She flinched-and then heard a body fall behind her. Snapping her head round to see the defender who had raised a vibro-axe behind her fall, she afforded him the slightest nod before blasting away another. Until suddenly, they were alone, surrounded by a sea of corpses.

Breathing hard, Ben slowly lowered the lightsaber and his blaster.

"I guess…you can see how the last visit here went down," he commented, the blood lust still zinging through his veins. Consciously he deactivated both weapons and stared ahead, reminding himself that they were his allies. Rey's friends.

"Who were they?" Rose asked.

"Cultists," he murmured. "Cult of Vader."

"As in…" Poe clarified.

"Darth Vader," Ben confirmed, hearing Chewie yowl in distress. "My grandfather. And yeah, I know. But until Kef Bir, I wanted to become the new Vader. To correct his mistakes and rule as he should have done."

The others shared a glance but remained silent. He nodded.

"And now…Castle Vader awaits," he said and headed off. Zorii glanced at the others and shrugged.

"Doesn't anyone else think this is a horrible idea?" she asked.

"Oh yeah," Poe agreed. "But we're going anyway. Even though he doesn't believe it, he needs our help. We've come this far so…anyone wanna go back to the ship?" Rose glared at him and walked past, followed by Chewie and Zorii, who pointedly holstered her blaster as she passed. BB8 gave a series of pointed beeps. "Yeah, I thought so as well," Poe conceded as he trailed along after them.


	20. Twenty

**Twenty.**

The Star Destroyer burst back into real space just above Mustafar and swiftly established orbit, all guns live and primed. Captain Rinder gathered his reports from the bridge crew, confirmed that the ship was in order and then turned to the General.

"Orbit established. All systems nominal," he reported, his even voice calm. He was a neat man with buzz cut blond hair and thoughtful eyes. Hux nodded curtly.

"Scan the planet for signs of the Resistance ship," he ordered in his clipped voice. "And life forms."

"The device determined that they reached here," Rinder reported, "but the ionisation within the atmosphere and the pollution from the vulcanism renders standard scanners unreliable. High band will take longer."

"Then get to it," Hux commanded, sweeping his pale eyes over the bridge. Everything aboard _the Eliminator_ was pristine, with no hissy fits from Ren or any sign of his abhorrent sorcerers, the Knights of Ren. And no evidence of Snoke either. Here, Hux was master of all he surveyed, served by loyal men and women who he treated well. And his personal ship had secretly been loaded with every technological innovation-including those that Snoke had suppressed or discarded. Hyperspace tracking had been proven over and over and he knew that it would serve him well-as it had in showing the way here. "And send out a summons to any of those remaining in the First Order, any ships or bases and order the commanders to my Flagship. Together, we can still rebuild…providing we can destroy that traitor!"

-o0o-

It was like being swathed in fog with a bad cold. Everything was muffled, the air thick with the stench of sulphur and the Force clogged with swirling, suffocating dark. Above him, the ruins of Castle Vader jutted against the roiling sky, the orange glow warming the clouds and seemingly setting them aflame. He was aware of the others, following him and he knew there would be little point in asking them to remain outside. The Castle had been built over a powerful gateway to the Dark Side and though that portal was now destroyed, the entire place had been swathed in darkness for so long that the voices were becoming harder and harder to ignore. That and the fact his head felt like it was splitting again.

Passing through the open gateway, he peered into the gloom. Half of the castle was collapsed but this hall seemed to be intact, diving deep into the bowels of the building. He peered, casting around for light. A few stray rays of the gloomy reddish light filtered through the cracks in the roof and he paused, inspecting the floor.

"Hey!" His head snapped round as Poe tossed him a flash lamp. "Try this. Hate to see you trip over and break your neck."

"Puts you in the minority," he muttered, tossing it back and igniting his lightsaber. The bluish light washed his pale features even paler, emphasising the stark contrasts between his dark eyes, raven hair and skin. Poe clicked on the flash lamp and sighed, checking the walls and floor as Ben walked forward, the hum of the weapon jarring amid the muffled silence. "Where did you get this?" he asked, searching the hallway ahead.

"Finn," Poe revealed. "He brought it…just in case. There were two lightsabers lying close to you and Rey when you were picked up from Exegol. Finn 'adopted' one." Frowning, Ben stared at the lightsaber.

"This was Luke's," he murmured, suppressing his animus towards his Uncle. Their relationship had been strained long before the legendary Jedi had tried to murder his sleeping nephew and though Ben had renounced the Dark, he still hadn't forgiven his Uncle. Yet in truth, the lightsaber was merely a tool, a device used to channel energy. Ignoring the kyber crystal within, the mystic connection between Jedi and crystal, the weapon was just a tool-and for now, it was a useful weapon and convenient source of light and Ben would make use of it while he could.

_Not as if I have any choice…or chance to make my own…_

The air grew clammy and colder, the stench of putrescence thickening and he heard coughs behind him. Illuminated by his own light and beeping worriedly, BB-8 nudged Poe's legs. Ben coughed and took a shuddering breath.

"Stick close," he said firmly. "And cover your mouths. This place is dangerous."

"Now he tells us," Zorii grumbled.

"He did tell us," Rose hissed, coughing gently. "And you have a mask on anyway." Chewie sneezed suddenly, the noise echoing round the dark space. Suddenly, there was the creak of stones moving, the grinding of rocks and an awful crashing sound.

"COLLAPSE!" Ben yelled as the group sprinted forward. Dust swirled around and with a crash, the roof fell in. Poe stumbled and Rose ducked as the huge blocks making the roof slammed down on them…

…and stopped, hovering in the air mere inches above their heads. Ben was frozen, his hands flung up as he held the massive monoliths up. The lightsaber was lying by his leg, the light casting eerie shadows around.

"Get back," he grunted, backing slowly away. Diverting his attention to kick the saber away almost resulted in the roof falling on him and cutting his own foot off-so Rose darted forward and snatched it before retreating to stand by the others. Slowly, he inched back and then allowed the remains of the roof to crash down, wrapping them all in choking dust. Hacking and coughing, he found hands pulling him back and Poe offering him a strip of cloth to cover his mouth. Struggling to breathe and feeling drained, he gratefully accepted the lightsaber back from Rose.

"Thanks," Poe told him and turned to the chastened Wookiee. "And you-oh, I am going to make sure everyone knows your sneeze brought the roof down!" Zorii inspected the rubble.

"Well, now we can only go forward, flyboy-and hope Commander Disaster there can find us another way out," she commented.

"Did you just call Kylo Ren Commander Disaster?" Poe asked her, his eyebrows raised in shock.

"So what if I did?"

"His name is Ben Solo," Rose piped up determinedly and Ben stared at her in shock.

"Whatever," Zorii retorted as the former Supreme Leader chuckled.

"Commander Disaster," he mused."Sounds more like Hux to me."

"Nope-definitely you!" Zorii said, her voice teasing. Poe stared at her.

"Are you flirting with the nasty First Order defector?" he asked in an outraged voice. Rose burst out laughing.

"Maybe…" Zorii teased Poe. Ben frowned and Rose inched closer.

"Pay them no mind," she reassured him. "They can't decide whether they want to be friends or _friends_."

"I want them to be alert," Ben murmured, blinking and shaking his head. "Something else is coming. Get behind me-and if I start acting strangely…run." Rose stared into his face and after a long moment nodded.

"But please call if you need us," she told him in a low voice. "We're here because this is dangerous and we want to help get Rey back." A little flicker of warmth fluttered through his chest and he nodded once.

"And you're Rey's friends and she would want you all alive to greet her when she comes back," he told her and then stalked off into the gloom.

-o0o-

Finn awoke with a start, eyes snapping open and finding with horror that he was tied up and on his bunk. The bowed shape of Jannah was sitting at his side, stripping down and reassembling her blaster as a way of distracting herself. Eyes wide, he jerked against his bonds.

"What happened?" he asked, his voice vaguely panicked. "Why am I tied up?" Jannah looked up.

"Don't you remember?" she asked him, her tone neutral. He blinked. What did he remember?

"I felt a real desire to rip Ren's head off," he admitted. "I felt like he had killed Rey…even though…he didn't…" His voice was puzzled. "Did he do something to me? Is this why I'm tied up?"

"Everything went a little crazy," the woman admitted, her eyes looking guilty. "I think we all felt a surge of…hatred. Every one of us wanted to shoot Ren, to hurt him. You wanted to watch him die slowly and painfully."

"I did?" Finn asked, his eyes wide. "Are you sure?" She nodded, absently continuing reassembling the weapon.

"It's something about this place," she admitted. "The Dark Side is very strong here. It messed with all of us, making us more suspicious, aggressive…but you're Force sensitive so it's a hundred times worse for you. At least, it seemed to be. You were a whole different person, the moment we landed. Ren said you were safer on the ship, as far away from the Castle as possible…"

"Then why don't I feel like shooting him now?" Finn asked. Jannah frowned.

"Maybe because Ren-and the others-went to the Castle?" she suggested, snapping the power unit back into place. "Perhaps whatever Darkness lingers here has more fun things to concentrate on?"

"Like our friends," Finn said. "Poe. Rose. Chewie…even Ren…"

"I would say especially Ren," Jannah told him decidedly, snapping the final piece into place. "That one still has Darkness in him." Finn sighed.

"I know," he sighed. "You see flashes, just now and then. But then he catches himself and I can see he's _trying_. He saved our lives. And he is absolutely determined to save Rey…" Jannah fiddled with the settings on her blaster.

"Doesn't it bother you what he is?" she asked him. "What he's done?" Finn sighed.

"I guess," he admitted. "I was a trooper on _the Finalizer._ We saw him most days. We heard of his tantrums, of stormtroopers and other staff injured because he was having a pissy fit. Everyone was on tenterhooks anywhere near him. He was like a cross between some spoilt brat and a psychopathic murderer. Everyone loathed him…"

"I can guess," Jannah agreed.

"But when we found him, he was holding Rey," Finn forced himself to say. "He was protecting her. And when he told us what happened, what he felt…I knew it was the truth. He believes he can bring Rey back. I believe him."

"But you don't trust him…" Jannah realised.

"None of us can…wholly," Finn admitted. "But he's delivered all along."

"He's got his powers back," Jannah noted. "He can go anywhere…"

"I think…he was trying to get away from us on _the Finalizer,_ " Finn said. "But he had to rescue us…and when we escaped we ended up…well, you saw."

"Some rescue!" Jannah teased him. He sighed.

"Could you undo me?" he asked. "Look, I'm not a danger…" She checked him over, then offered a small nod, untying him. He sighed in relief and stretched, trying to get the blood flow back into his cramped limbs. "I cannot thank you enough," he said. "Thank you, thank you…"

"HEY!" Beau's voice jolted them from their discussion and both looked guiltily at the doorway. The Resistance fighter sighed. "I'm not even asking why you're untied-I presume you're taking responsibility if he goes feral again?" Jannah nodded urgently. "I thought you might be interested that a First Order Star Destroyer has just appeared in orbit."

"WHAT?"

"And it's not a coincidence, is it?" Beau asked.

"Hyperspace tracking," Finn murmured. Jannah's head snapped round.

"What?"

"Hux," Finn realised and scrambled to his feet. "We need to get ready. Keep scanning and if they enter the atmosphere, we'll have to warn them…"

"May be worth giving them a head's up anyway," Beau offered, lifting the comm. "Falcon to General Dameron. Poe, do you read me?"

But no matter how hard they tried, all they could get was static…

-o0o-

The sense of cold and dark was getting more and more oppressive, the whispers a constant shushing sound so the individual words were almost unintelligible now. _Almost_. Except…his voice.

_I knew you couldn't keep away…_

Ben stiffened, hearing the voice and feeling the instinctive chill that ran down his spine. It was a learned response, a reaction to countless encounters where sometimes there would be praise, sometimes denigration and frequently there was pain.

"Snoke," he breathed.

_Where else would I be but here, waiting for my treacherous apprentice? Waiting to repay you for the treason you committed. Though I was impressed that you finally developed the nerve and defied all your programming and conditioning to move against me._

"You always taunted me that I was too weak and conflicted," Ben snarked, his eyes flicking from side to side, trying to locate the malevolent presence amid the absolute darkness.

_You were weak and conflicted. And you still are._

"And yet…you are dead," Ben smirked, his voice eerily calm.

_You are still a child, hiding behind a mask._

"I have no mask!"

_The mask of being a decent man. The mask of being Ben Solo. The mask of being what they want you to be. I have seen your mind and soul. I created Kylo Ren. I know the darkness that runs to the core of your rotten soul. You were unloved and unlovable. Your family rejected and ignored you-because who would want such a tainted creature, always filled with anger and hatred? You had no friends. Even your master, the famed Jedi who saved the Galaxy, could see no good in you. I was the only one willing to pick up the pieces and give you a home._

"You picked me to pieces and tortured me to mould me into the image you wanted!" Ben roared. "You fed the fires, you corrupted me, you stoked my anger! You warped and twisted me from inside the womb!"

_And you welcomed it! You were a scared child, hiding in the dark, whimpering because no one wanted you. I wanted you! And you begged for my validation, for any word of praise I would give you. And you did whatever I commanded just to feel that praise. And you did it willingly._

"YES!" Ben shouted. "But not any more. She saved me. She drew me back. And I chose her over you!"

_Your precious Rey is dead._

"You're dead," Ben repeated, the saber raised against the thick darkness. "I killed you!"

_And here, in a Dark stronghold, that scarcely matters. I am almost as powerful as I was in life. And when you try to resurrect her, I will be there as well. I will destroy her and take her body and then I will destroy you as well._

Suddenly, the rage was there, the anger at every moment Snoke had chastised, boiling over and filling his body with rage. He spun, the lightsaber slashing through the darkness, humming as it arched round and round. Faces lunged at him, images of guards in red armour, of electrowhips and vibro-blades and even blasters. The Knights of Ren swirled around him, familiar faces and psyches, their weapons all turned on him once more, circling him to overwhelm him by sheer weight of numbers. But the one face he sought, the one enemy he desired to face again was missing, though his taunting voice swirled around him.

"FACE ME!" he bellowed. "FACE ME, YOU MONSTER!"

The others screeched to a halt, backing away as he raged. Chewie gave a worried growl.

"No, I can't see anything either," Poe murmured. "BB-you see anything, buddy?"

A rather confused and dispirited beep confirmed the little droid couldn't detect any foes in the gloom. Zorii tilted her head.

"Well, he looks like he's well and truly gone," she commented sharply. "Like Finn, seeing what isn't there." Rose stared at her and nodded.

"He told us to run if he started behaving strangely," she breathed and grabbed the woman's arm. "I don't think he sees us. I think he only sees enemies. Only enemies!" Understanding, the other woman skirted the edge of the hall and sprinted ahead, with Rose and BB-8 following. Poe stared at the tall shape, seeing the lightsaber slash and slice, every motion measured and precise. A deadly ballet, waged with absolute ferocity and rage against an enemy that didn't exist. Nodding to Chewie, he ran after the others. Giving a final, pitying yowl, Chewie shambled after him.


	21. Twenty One

**Twenty One.**

"If I was to tell you that there are landing craft entering the atmosphere, would that completely ruin the day?" Beau asked Finn and Jannah as they nervously paced the crew area in the Millennium Falcon. Both stared at him. Finn was on tenterhooks, swinging between the desire to exit the ship, run headlong towards the Castle and barrel in, doing whatever he could to get Rey back and the duty to stay and accept that this place was toxic to him.

"Is that something you're likely to say?" Jannah asked dryly.

"Maybe, maybe," Beau admitted. "Hypothetically, there could be three, homing in to land on the plains to the north of the Castle. And due to land in ten minutes."

"Any luck getting through to Poe?" Finn asked, ceasing his pacing and walking right up to the man. The small shake of his head and slump of his shoulders told the tale even before he confirmed it.

"So what do we do?" Jannah asked. "Go get them?"

"And be trapped on the ground and outnumbered?" Finn asked and then sighed. "We need to get the ship ready to fly…and be ready when they arrive." There was a scuffle as Tamini emerged from the galley, her eyes glittering with irritation and a bowl of weak porridge clasped in her hand.

"There is another option," she said, glaring up at the humans. "You could take the ship to them."

-o0o-

Exhaustion was weighing his limbs and he felt as if he had been fighting for hours. Every time he cut down an enemy, another surged forward. Red-clad Sith guards, Knights of Ren, Praetorians…all surrounded him, forcing him to expend his energies to protect himself and stop them killing him. Parry, duck, twist, slice, stab, deflect…every motion was precise and balanced but though he carved a deadly swathe through the opponents, there were never any fewer and he was never any nearer the end…

_Think…_

He spun away, the lightsaber raised, pointing aggressively at them as was his usual stance, his weight balanced forward. His chest was heaving and sweat trickled down his neck as he tracked their movements. He was pretty certain he had killed at least one of them three times already. It just made no sense…

 _They aren't real,_ he realised. _These are just ghosts generated by the Dark Side. Rey and I killed the Praetorians and the Sith Guards. I slaughtered the Knights of Ren myself. None of these are alive…but they can still harm me in this place. This is an illusion, a distraction to keep me from my goal…_

_Or hold me up._

He gestured and all the shapes were slammed backwards, away from him and crashing devastatingly against the rocky walls. Finally he lowered his lightsaber.

"I won't play your game any more, Snoke," he growled, tamping down his rage furiously. Losing control now was not an option-not when he had the others nearby and particularly when he had a very specific purpose.

" _You are weak-just as you always have been,_ " Snoke taunted him, looming from the dark suddenly. He couldn't help himself, back-pedalling and raising the lightsaber defensively to hide his panic. He could sense the evil presence swirling around him and the sight of the attenuated gold-clad shape, moving towards him with the scarred, misshapen head and the ice-cold blue eyes. Snoke inspected him and his voice grew colder. _"Pathetic. I knew I should have searched harder for the spawn of the Palpatine line-because you were always a disappointment, a spoilt child in a mask!"_

Fury surged through Ben and he leapt forward-to meet a blast of Force lightning that spun him over and over, face and hands scraped on the rough floor. The saber skipped away and he slowly raised his head, feeling Snoke's energies begin to crackle through the air once more. In a second, he extended his hand and the lightsaber slapped into his skinned palm, igniting as he rolled to deflect another blast of lightning.

"And yet-I killed you," Ben taunted him, rising. Snoke was advancing and he couldn't sense the others so he rolled to his feet and deflected the last blast straight at Snoke, causing him to disappear. Then he dropped to his knees, shaking his hand and catching his breath. His head was pounding and he could feel the seductive lure of the Dark Side, calling him back. And he knew, with shame, he had embraced it-for a few brief moments. In the battle, it had been as if he was back on _the Supremacy_ , fighting for his life with Rey at his back. It was the one moment of clarity he had…until Kef Bir.

But the others had fled deeper into the fortress and he was the only remotely friendly thing here-and probably their only way out. Stumbling to his feet, he turned and headed off in the direction they had run, every sense straining. There was still shame at how easily he had surrendered, how welcome the surge of power had been and he mentally scolded himself over and over, recalling how much his mother had sacrificed to call him to the light.

_What is wrong with me that I seek the Darkness so readily when I know why I must cling to the light?_

There were breaths up ahead and lights…and something slithering rather menacingly amid the gloom. The roof was creaking ominously and he could hear Chewbacca growl: against all rationality, he felt a smile lift his lips and secretly hoped the big Wookiee didn't sneeze again. He was feeling exhausted and really doubted he could support the roof once more. And then he saw flickers of light, sinking ahead. Shaking his head against a surge of unhealthy concern, he staggered forward and then he heard them stop.

"What's that?" Zorii asked, her voice sharp. There was a hiss.

"I guess a hiss isn't a good sign," Rose put in.

"Ya think?" Poe added as Chewie gave a distressed yowl. Leaping forward, Ben found himself halfway down a wide flight of stairs, facing a yawning black abyss ahead.

"Stay behind me," he growled.

"You playing with us again or have you joined the black cloak and cowl brigade once more?" Poe asked him directly.

"Well, the cowl would be nice and warm in a damp, cold Sith fortresses," Ben told him sarcastically. "But no-the Dark Side is very strong here. There was a cave under the castle that contains the Dark Side locus and a portal to the Dark Side. My grandf…Vader closed it eventually…but the Dark is very strong here. And I am…I was a servant of the Dark Side. I tend to attract the Darkness…"

"D'you mind standing over there, then?" Zorii asked pointedly as they peered into the blackness ahead.

"Are you alright?" Rose asked carefully and he nodded, not wanting to explain his injuries.

"What we need is up ahead," he said honestly. "And the closer we get to the former site of the portal, the stronger the influence of the darkness…" There was a chittering and the sounds of something heavy moving, along with a stale, putrescent smell.

"That doesn't smell good either," Zorii added, peering through her visor and levelling her blaster at the velvet darkness.

"They never do," Ben told her, inching forward, down the stairs. He could sense the heavy body moving and a red glow from Dark-fuelled eyes. And beyond, he felt the throbbing of the artefact they sought.

And then it attacked, a monster that looked like a cross between a spider and a scorpion, black and marked with red, the tail slashing fiercely as the glowing yellow and blue eyes focussed on the tall shape.

"BACK!" Ben yelled, the lightsaber flashing up to parry a vicious swipe. The creature was armoured and fast, the lightsaber deflecting off its scutes as it spun again, a segmented leg slicing at him and cutting across his thigh. Biting down on a yelp, he jumped back and glared. Then he attacked and the watchers found themselves mesmerised by his movements. Every motion was precise, graceful and powerful, his balance excellent and saber constantly moving, treated as an extension of his arm. Whether it was a sweep, a stab or even a small unconscious circular flick as he paced sideways, his dark eyes never left the creature as he anticipated the next attack.

The room shook as the creature roared, rearing up and the front four limbs wheeled and slashed at him, which he parried frantically, spinning under the attack and slashing at the creature's abdomen, opening a superficial slice that leaked little orange fluid. He blinked: the orange viscid liquid landed on the stone floor and dissolved the rock with a sinister hiss.

_You gotta be kidding me. It's almost lightsaber proof and it has acidic blood?_

The tail slashed round and he bellowed in pain as it cut across his back. Stumbling forward, a leg caught him across the shoulder and he found himself spun away, landing on his face and looking up as the creature lowered its head and chittered furiously, advancing for the kill. Then the whine of blaster fire sounded and he glanced over his shoulder to see the other four lined up, laying down cover fire. There was no question, no hesitation: every eye was on the monster. Gesturing, he felt the lightsaber slap into his palm and then he was up, legs folded under his body before he launched into a Force-assisted leap, spinning over the creature. Still firing at it, the others backed up as it lunged-and then it screamed. The tail arched round and stabbed through Ben's shoulder but he had already driven his lightsaber through its head, the motion of the laser blade slicing the head in two. There was a shudder before the monster slammed to the floor, its killer leaping away just in time.

He landed clumsily in front of the others and then cringed as the corpse burst into flames, the dancing light illuminating the large chamber they stood in. Frowning, he deactivated the saber and then looked around, his body freezing as he saw the picture. It was a young woman-younger than he was-with clear lightly tanned skin, dark brown hair styled elegantly and elaborately crowning her head and clear caramel-brown eyes. She was very beautiful, the smallest smile lifting her lips. Unconsciously, he walked forward, brow furrowing further as he realised he could see his mother's eyes in this portrait, a face he had seen in images when he was much younger. His breath caught as he looked around, seeing the chamber devoid of any other ornamentation, a pang hitting his heart harder than he would have expected.

_Everything he had believed was wrong. He had still loved her._

"Who is she?" Poe asked, his voice respectful. Ben swallowed.

"Padme Amidala Naberrie," he said, his throat suddenly thick and voice hoarse. "Anakin Skywalker's wife. My grandmother." Poe frowned.

"The General's mother?" he murmured.

"She died in childbirth," Ben confirmed tonelessly. "I never met her. Fear for her and her unborn children was one of the reasons why Anakin turned to the Dark Side." _Though he was corrupted by Darth Sidious along the way._

"And he kept the picture, even though he became Vader," Poe murmured. Ben nodded.

"Being a Sith doesn't preclude emotions like love," he said after a moment and trying to think of a way of phrasing things so the others would understand. "The Jedi _suppress_ emotions, try to expunge them from their hearts and minds because they believe that emotions lead to anger, jealousy, cruelty, darkness. But what that means Sith can feel love and joy as well…but most embrace anger and hatred more because they give power. The Dark emotions are much stronger than no emotions. But they can also lead you down a path from which it is almost impossible to turn back."

"You did," Poe pointed out. Ben stared into the eyes of his long-dead grandmother, a woman who had perished so young when she had everything to live for and felt his heart curl in shame.

"Only because Rey kept pulling me," he confessed. "Rey was such a strong light that I couldn't let her go. And even though she used the Dark Side to deal me a lethal blow, she wouldn't let me die. She healed me…and feeling her use her own life force to spare me my just reward finally gave me the strength to do what I had to…" Then he looked away, to the centre of the room where a heavy stone slab deeply etched with Sith Runes.

Voices were whispering, insistent, nagging. Beneath the stone, the Holocron was imbued almost with a life of its own, a malignant quasi-sentience that slowly eroded anyone close, especially those who were not already sunk beyond retrieval in the blanket of the Dark.

"It's there," he said, turning away from the portrait. "You need to keep back. It's a powerful artefact and it can speak to you, try to turn you. Do not touch it. Leave it to me."

"And you're okay with it?" Rose checked. He quirked a humourless smile.

"Honestly? I'm not sure," he admitted. "But I'm the only one who can use it. None of you can understand its contents and I'm not sure any of you could resist its effects either."

"And if you can't?" Poe asked him. Dark eyes sliding up to the largest shape, Ben gave a grim smile.

"Set Chewie on me," he said mirthlessly. "I wouldn't hurt him. And he could definitely hurt me."

"That doesn't sound too optimistic," Zorii commented dryly, folding her arms.

"I'm not expecting to get out of this alive," he told her bluntly, walking forward. "But as long as Rey is back, it doesn't matter."

Rose stared at him, her heart contracting a little at the bleak tone. She had no idea what was going on inside his head but she intellectually knew that he was absolutely shredded by guilt for what he had done and at the loss of Rey. That he couldn't restore her to life when she had saved him. And everything he had done had been to this one end, to try to get her back…at the willing cost of his life. And while she really shouldn't care-because what he had done shouldn't ever be redeemable-she found that she did. Commander Rose Tico of the Resistance-Rey's friend and Paige's sister-finally understood what her friend had meant. The man facing her was Ben Solo, not Kylo Ren. And he wanted to get her friend back.

"Take care," Poe said and they stepped back as he approached the slab. The whispers were shushing through the back of his mind, the words muffled but the sensation of evil intensifying. He rubbed his temple, feeling a migraine starting and focussed on the slab. With a hum, the lightsaber ignited in his hand and he danced forward, jamming the blade into the stone, the edges slowly blurring as he methodically used the weapon to soften the rock. Then, with a clawed slash of the hand, he used the Force to rip the cover away, the heavy granite landing with a crash and shattering.

The Holocron was sitting there, just as the Wayfinder had…was it only weeks ago? Pyramidal, a sickly yellow and throbbing with malevolence, Ben briefly wished he was still wearing gloves and hesitated for a second as he reached out to grasp it.

_Coward._

It was Snoke's voice.

Gritting his teeth, he grasped it, feeling a strange sensation of hot and cold in his hand. The voices intensified and he grimaced but slowly straightened up, his face carefully controlled though he was breathing hard.

"We need to get out of here," he said evenly. "This way."

"No argument here," Poe commented as they followed, ducking into a narrow alcove and finding themselves in a passage that only Rose could stand up straight in. Chewie was almost bent double and everyone was grumbling, uncomfortable, cramped and stumbling in only the harsh light of Ben's lightsaber. For what seemed like an eternity but probably only half a kilometre, they scrambled along until they suddenly emerged from a black rocky outcrop into the wan grey light amid the skeletal trees. A wash of hot sulphurous air hit them and all of them choked again, craning their necks to peer at the ruins of the Castle, jutting against the orange-tinged sky.

"POE!" The comm crackled into life.

"Finn? How are ya feeling, buddy?" The affection in Poe's voice was obvious.

"Good, good…I don't want to kill Ren now," Finn explained with chagrin and then paused. "But we have other problems. A Star Destroyer has entered orbit and three carriers of stormtroopers have landed and are heading your way."

"Hux," Ben growled. "Just for once, I wish he would be less predictable."

"Can you detect them?" Poe asked.

"Sensors are not saying anything but we know they landed!" Finn reported. "Be on your guard. And I think you need to get back to the ship as soon as…"

A brace of blaster fire bracketed then and they all started as white-armoured shapes emerged from among the trees. Ben's saber was in his hand in an instant as he stepped forward.

"Get back to the ship," he growled. "I'll take care of this."

"Ren?" Poe began. "We should…"

"What part of _go_ don't you understand?" Ben snarled, glancing over his shoulder. His eyes were black and edged with burning red and his face twisted into an expression of fury. "I can deal with this…" Rose opened her mouth to protest but a volley of blaster fire had them ducking back into the lea of the rocky tunnel entrance.

"The walking into a hail of blasters," Zorii snarked back. Chewie added his disapproval as Poe narrowed his eyes as he heard Ben's voice. The look on his face and his posture suddenly looked a lot more like Kylo Ren than he had moments before and his eyes drifted treacherously towards the sickly yellow glow of the holocron. For a second, the tall former Supreme Leader cast Poe a sharp look and the slightest nod-and then he accelerated forward, the hum of the lightsaber as it swung intercepting the whine and explosion of blasters. The General tapped his friends on the arms and as the attacking stormtroopers concentrated on Ben. they ran for it, firing to cover their escape. But behind them, teeth bared in fury, Ben launched into the stormtroopers, carving a bloody swathe through the ranks. Sliced open, impaled, slammed aside by the Force or hit by lightsaber-deflected blasts, the white-armoured shapes simply didn't stand a chance against the raging monster.

But just as he was turning away, the ranks were replaced with a seemingly endless swarm of troopers, all closing on the lone shape…


	22. Twenty Two

**Twenty Two**

_Something was wrong._

Kylo Ren was embroiled in battle, his body zinging with the Force, the power surging and guiding his every move and yet, there was a nagging sense of dislocation. He pushed it back as he swirled, lunging to impale another body on his lightsaber, his left hand swinging round to brutally smash another two against the iron-hard trunks of the Mustafan forest. The warm breeze swirled around him as he dived away, slashing in a wide arc that bisected an unfortunate who was trying to flank the former Supreme Leader. The familiar tang of sulphur mingled with the sweet scents of charred flesh and plastic and the coppery tang of blood as he paused, the lightsaber held rigidly in front of his tense body. The brilliant blue blade washed his blood-splattered features pallid, his eyes dark with rage. Sweat stuck tendrils of his raven hair against his forehead and cheeks as he breathed hard, preparing to repel the next assault.

The stormtroopers were surging at him, their ranks tight and coordination perfect, as was to be expected from the trained men and women of the First Order and he felt their determination, seasoned with fear and uncertainty, through the Force. Brow furrowing as the next wave came at him, he only had time to twist his lightsaber to deflect the half dozen blaster bolts thrown at him. He could catch them, of course, but that required a lot of power and discipline that could weaken him when he was surrounded by so many foes…

_Stormtroopers? Foes?_

He blinked and almost stopped until a blaster bolt grazed his side. Roaring in fury, he extended his hand, fingers splayed before he drew them into a vicious, deliberate fist that had the man who had shot Kylo Ren screaming as his throat was crushed. The blaster fire on his form intensified and it was all he could to to deflect it with the saber and his hand, feeling every impact as if on his mind.

He flinched as a volley of blasters sounded from behind him, the wielders cutting down the stormtroopers who were attacking him. Hunkered down, he could sense seven people and one droid, ranged behind cover and firing steadily against the stormtroopers.

_Resistance! They must be Resistance! So why were they helping him?_

_Why were the stormtroopers trying to kill him?_

And then the fog thinned, the blanket of blood lust and cruelty lifting a little to enable him to think rationally. To recall a pair of hazel eyes, liberally flecked with green, a smile that lit a beautiful face, chestnut hair swept into those three buns…

_Rey._

_How could he forget?_

He flinched and felt a cold surge wash through him. Instinctively, he knew it was from the Sith Holocron tucked in his belt but the same instincts had him ducking and parrying another volley of blaster fire, grimacing as he felt another twenty troopers approaching. And then a ferocious volley of blasters fired from behind him, cutting down the front rank.

"Ben!" Rose's voice cut through the sounds of battle and he spun, his eyes locking in her face. Idly, he deflected a shot that was aiming close as the others-Finn, Poe, Chewie, Zorii, Jannah and Beau-all fired at the stormtroopers. "We're not going without you!"

He blinked, the Darkness swirling around him. The Darkness that was his friend, his blanket, his comfort through every failure and success, through pain and loneliness and rejection. The Darkness that had cost him the lives of his parents, his Uncle, his fellow padawans, his Rey…

A surge of memory chased the darkness away. _Rey._ Talking to her. Seeing her frown and cry and smile. Feeling her bravery, her defiance, her pain, her trust, her l…

"I'm not here to die," he ground out, fighting the Darkness with all his strength. He could feel the hold slipping and the anger ebbing, leaving him exhausted. Jannah threw a couple of grenades and in the ensuing blasts, amid the smoke and dust that Ben stirred up using the Force, everyone ran for _the Falcon_. Every step was dogged by whispers and hisses: Snoke, Palpatine, Vader and even some voices he had never heard before. A huge part of him wanted to ditch the Holcron, knowing it was trying to seduce him, draw him back to the Dark and undo everything he had sacrificed so much to achieve.

_Rey. Rey was the reason why he was here, why he was risking all he had left. For her._

_Because some debts could never be repaid._

Poe and Chewie had accelerated ahead while the others intermittently fired to cover their escape, still making fast progress. Stumbling, his side aching and feeling the dampness of blood seeping into his tunic from that and his other wounds, he almost stumbled and fell but he found Finn grabbing his arm, hauling him up and he nodded in acknowledgement. Then, up ahead-much closer than it had been, the _Falcon_ was haphazardly landed on a slope, the ramp down with Poe already visible in the cockpit, prepping for their escape. Then his head snapped round as he heard the stormtroopers approaching and he lingered on the ramp, the lightsaber clipped to his belt by the Holocron, his hands raised, palms forward as he deflected the increasing hail of blasts away until the rising howl of the engines signalled the departure.

His hand found the control and the ramp raised, hiding the view of the ravaged planet of Mustafar. They were already lurching upwards as his knees buckled, his hand pressing against his side.

"Hang on!" Poe yelled. "This is going to be bumpy." As if to prove him right, the _Millennium Falcon_ jolted sideways as the sounds of explosions sounded.

"What was that?" Rose shouted.

"Nothing. Just a couple of TIE fighters," Poe shouted back, his brow furrowed as he wrenched the freighter into a spiral as they accelerated away from the planet. Proximity sensors were beeping furiously as the fighters clustered around _the Falcon_ , strafing her. Zorii and Finn had taken the guns and were firing back spiritedly while the others hung on. Tamini emerged from her cabin to see the others try to strap themselves in and her irritated gaze alighted on the drooping shape of Ben, his blood-stained hand pressed to the wound on his side. Uttering a curse, she scuttled forward and pushed him onto the seats by the chess table, muttering in her own language.

"You! Always injured, never managing to do any mission without taking ridiculous risks," she scolded him and his eyes snapped wide in shock.

"I'm used to being supported by as many First Order stormtroopers as I need, not having to fight them every kriffing step of the way," he retorted. "And I have the Force."

"Not enough," she told him, pushing his hand away and peering at the wound. The blaster shot had tagged him, the wound wide but not life-threateningly deep. She tutted and peered into her bag, sloshing a slimy purple liquid onto the gaping defect.

"OW!" he protested. The stuff had stung like acid, the flesh bubbling under the liquid. She scowled.

"Quit whining," she told him brusquely.

"You know, your bedside manner needs some work," he snarked, feeling the anger rise again but he pushed it down. The ship flipped and automatically, he grabbed her and stabilised her. Her eyes flicked up to look into his face.

"At least you have manners," she told him shortly.

"I think you may be in the minority in thinking that," he reminded her.

"I think you were brought up well though recent actions not so good," she shot back. "But deeds speak louder than words." She slathered a greenish gloop on the wound and then slapped a Bacta patch over the defect. Quietly, she looked into his eyes. "That will do for now," she murmured and turned to his other injuries. "But you don't care to be made right."

"No, no I don't,' he muttered as she shook her head.

"Death is not the answer," she told him quietly.

"Sometimes, it is the only price that's high enough," he replied. "Thank you." Wordlessly, she continued dressing his other wounds-basic patching with Bacta rather than bothering with any more sophisticated means-before she turned away as the ship jolted heavily. He could hear the guns firing and sensed the explosions outside, the lives of TIE pilots ending and a sense of fury and frustration at his helplessness enfolded him. He was the Supreme Leader of the First Order, for kriff's sake! He was master of his destiny; a pilot who led attacks with absolute ruthlessness and had found Exegol; a man who was always on the front line of the battle, striking terror into the hearts of his foes and who was always decisive and in command of any situation. But here, he was dependent on the actions of others for his life: it was infuriating.

Abruptly, he scrambled up and staggered along the jolting passageway to the cockpit, almost falling into the seat behind Poe.

"Your buddy, Hugs, must really want a reunion," Poe grunted as he threw the _Falcon_ into a dive.

"Not mutual," Ben growled, hanging on.

"What is it between the two of you?" Poe persisted, his eyes on the battle that surrounded them.

"Really? You wanna discuss this now?" Ben growled.

"What better time?" Poe asked him, his tone serious as they dodged another couple of TIEs that tried to flank them. Ben suddenly grimaced.

"BANK! NOW!" he yelled.

"What…?"

"NOW!" Unconsciously, he overlaid the words with Force compulsion and Poe jammed the Falcon into a starboard roll, the blasts from _the Eliminator's_ ventral cannons missing the freighter by whiskers. Poe blinked and then zigzagged them between their attackers.

"What was that?" he asked in a strange voice. Ben stared and reran what had happened. His eyes narrowed.

"I needed to save our lives," he said bluntly. "And you weren't listening." Poe visibly tensed and flipped the Falcon, allowing Finn and Zorii to clear them enough of a path. Instantly, he slammed the lever forward and the ship jumped to lightspeed. And then he glanced over to Chewie, who gave a small yowl. In a moment, Poe was on his feet, grabbing Ben and hauling the larger man into the corridor. Immediately, he had his blaster jammed into Ben's throat.

"Don't you EVER go pulling that stunt on me again!" he hissed, his eyes dark with rage. "I have done everything I could to try to trust you, to give you the benefit of the doubt but just when I think I'm figuring you out, when I think maybe Rey was right…you manage to prove me wrong. You show you're still Kylo Ren, still the man who invades minds and murders innocent unarmed villagers on a whim! And I still wonder if I shouldn't just have shot you when you were brought back to the base!"

"That may have been the wisest thing to consider," Ben said, his teeth gritted. The damned Sith Holocron was still attached to his belt, the voices whispering into his mind. A part of him craved the familiarity of the voices, hissing poison, murmuring reassurances, whispering seductive propaganda that he had heard for all but the last year of his life.

_Kill him. Crush his throat. He wants to kill you, to stop the plan. If you don't kill him, he will kill you first…_

"What does Hugs want?" Poe hissed.

"Me," Ben replied, pushing the voices back. _Remember Rey. Only Rey._ "He wants me."

"Why?" The muzzle of the blaster dug deeper into his throat.

"We were rivals, servants of the Supreme Leader. Hux killed his father to advance his own position. I was Snoke's pet and apprentice. Snoke treated us both badly. Hux revelled in his power, always ambitious, always eyeing the throne. Hatred was mutual. I despised him as much as he despised me. When I killed Snoke, I took the throne."

"Wait…you killed Snoke? I thought…the First Order…Rey…" Ben took a slow breath.

"I told Hux that she had killed Snoke. It was necessary because had I admitted I had done the deed, the entire First Order would have turned on me before I could have consolidated my power. With Rey the culprit and Hux cowed-temporarily-the First Order could focus on eliminating the Resistance and avenging their Supreme Leader."

"Coward." The tone was brutal, the blaster still uncomfortably jabbing his throat.

"Strategist," Ben murmured. "I had asked Rey to join me. She rejected me, rejected my vision of ruling the Galaxy with her at my side. I disappointed her because she risked everything to try to turn me. I wasn't ready then, though I killed Snoke for her. I did it to save her life. I could never kill her-and if I didn't, Snoke would have destroyed me. It was the only way. So without her, the power was all I had left. But Hux suspected…I think he remotely accessed the Throne Room cameras before I erased them. He was plotting against me. I did everything I could to render him an insignificant underling but I guess he had his own plans, his own strategy."

"He was our spy," Poe confirmed, pulling the blaster back an inch though not reholstering it. "All to get his revenge on you." Ben sighed.

"The Holocron is dangerous," he explained. "It whispers to me, tries to pull me back to the Darkness. But I have to open it, read the data because I have to get Rey back. But please…watch me. Carefully. Because I worry I will lose everything if I slip." Poe stared into his dark eyes and nodded curtly, accepting the words. He holstered his blaster brusquely and turned away, then spun back and punched Ben. Stumbling back against the metal wall, the taller man grimaced and took a deep breath. "I guess I deserved that."

"You pull anything like that again-on me or anyone else-and I'll kill you without hesitation!" Poe growled and stalked away. Ben sighed-and then his eyes widened. Rey was standing opposite him and folded her arms as she appraised him thoughtfully.

 _"_ _What happened?"_ she asked. He moved his jaw slightly and winced.

"I saved our lives," he commented.

_"_ _And…"_

"I used the Force to make Poe steer us out of danger," he admitted. She rolled her eyes.

 _"_ _Good move,"_ she told him sarcastically. _"Poe. Whose mine you basically ransacked previously when you had him prisoner-and who really hasn't forgiven you. Do you have a complete death wish?"_ He gave a small, chagrinned smile.

"Probably," he admitted. "I seem to have spent the entire time since you gave me back my life on Kef Bir trying to get killed." Her expression softened and she walked forward, resting her hand on his clenched fist.

 _"_ _Ben? Talk to me,"_ she pleaded, her eyes wide with concern. He forced his hand to relax.

"Rey…this isn't simple and it isn't going to be easy," he confessed. She stared up into his face, eyes wide and concerned.

 _"_ _Ben,"_ she whispered. _"Tell me."_

"I lost control," he said in a low voice, his tone rough. "I…allowed myself to become _him_ again. In battle. I killed…so many…" He was breathing hard and she gently pulled his face onto her shoulder, feeling his arms wrap around her. His body was shaking and for a brief moment, he felt safe. Her arms tightened around him.

 _"_ _You fought them alone to protect my friends,"_ she whispered, reading the images on his mind. _"There was no option, Ben. You were the only one who could fight so many and survive."_

"They should have left me," he told her, his voice muffled.

 _"_ _That's not who they are,"_ she reminded him. _"That's not who I am. We fought for what is right. What we believe in. We fight for what we love."_ He gave a choking laugh against her shoulder and slowly raised his head.

"Rey…" His voice was hoarse. "I…"

 _"_ _Ben…you're my closest friend,"_ she told him simply. His eyes widened in shock. _"You know things about me that I literally have told no one else."_

"Not that you shared willingly," he reminded her, a hint of self-loathing entering his voice.

 _"_ _Not that you were always kind,"_ she conceded, her eyes inspecting his features, _"Not that you were always open to making good choices…"_

"They were what I believed were right," he explained. "But you are right."

 _"_ _You didn't forge the bond between us, Ben,"_ she told him sternly, her hand gentling his cheek. _"But somehow, the Force decided that we were destined to be joined as a Dyad. That our souls are linked. And part of that was getting to know you. Not just as Kylo Ren, but as Ben."_ He grimaced.

"Sorry," he mouthed but she frowned slightly.

_"_ _And I do know all of you. I have felt your soul. So I know the Darkness you have fought, have lived with throughout your life. I know of your loneliness, your guilt, the rejection you experienced, your insecurity and misery and anger. I have felt the fury running through you, the temper you couldn't master as Kylo Ren because that was who Snoke wanted you to be. Unbalanced. Conflicted. Easy to rule." He glared at her but she allowed her lips to lift in a small smile. "But I also felt what was inside. Your bravery. Your determination. Your compassion to me. Your love for Leia. Your grief and sorrow at your actions. Your guilt at your crimes. Your capacity to change, to make amends."_

"I'm a monster," he breathed.

 _"_ _You're human,"_ she told him. _"You made terrible choices after being groomed since you were a small child and abandoned by everyone who should have supported and protected you."_

"You have to grant me some of my own agency," he told her softly. "I wasn't a passive victim of my own life. I knew right from wrong. I made a choice when I left the ruins of the Temple. I chose Snoke-partly because I didn't believe I could ever return home, that my parents would never believe my story. I didn't kill all the other padawans but I was blamed. So it was partly fear and partly anger that made me choose him. But I could have chosen not to. I was seduced by his pitch and I wanted so much to believe in his vision. I wanted to be wanted, to be treated as special, to have power and complete the work of my grandfather. And I hardened my heart to the evils I was committing because if I didn't, I would have been useless to him. I could have run, I guess. And every time I killed or hurt another, I revelled in the power. I filtered out the screams, the pain. And I knew there were times when I could have escaped. He would've followed but if I had wanted, I could have cut myself off from the Force-as you said Luke did. It was only you-your unshakeable belief and your incandescent light and the way you challenged me as no one else could. Even when we fought, we sparred verbally. You never backed down. You never gave ground. And you believed in me. Your belief was so strong you risked your life and came to me. And I could have stood back and let Snoke kill you…but I couldn't."

 _"_ _You saved my life,"_ she whispered.

"And I will do it again," he promised, his voice low as he stared into her eyes. "Believe me, Rey. I won't fail. I promise."

 _"_ _I know,"_ she breathed. Tentatively, he touched her cheek.

"This will be dangerous," he warned her. "And whatever happens, you have to react. You have to protect yourself."

 _"_ _Ben, I trust you,"_ she told him honestly. _"You came back for me on Exegol."_

"Don't," he whispered. "Whatever happens, be ready to fight for your existence. Against whoever is there. Please…"

 _"_ _You will be there,"_ she told him.

"Anyone," he repeated.

 _"_ _Ben,"_ she breathed. _"You know I love you? You know you are my soul mate? You know I will never leave you?"_

_You already did-though you had no say in the matter._

"When I awoke and you were gone, I had never felt so alone," he told her.

 _"_ _You're not alone,"_ she told him. _"I am always with you, Ben. Always."_

"Neither are you-and I will bring you back," he promised as she faded. He stared at the space where she had been and hated himself for not having the courage to speak the words to her. "I love you."

"Ben?" Rose was standing a few feet further on, her eyes wide and face ashen. "Was that…Rey?" He nodded.

"Yeah…"

"I saw her," she breathed. He frowned and then realised they were touching. Then he nodded.

"Yeah," he said again. "When we touch, we interact with the real world at the other end of the Bond…and as she's…nowhere…that would be here."

"I heard her," Rose said quietly. He stiffened and felt his cheeks heating.

"How much?"

"The _I love you_ bit," she revealed. He sighed. "From both of you." He turned away and shook his head.

"It doesn't matter," he told her quietly. "There is no way that we would ever be allowed to live in peace, even if I succeeded. Whatever Kylo Ren did, he killed our chances of being together. Killed Ben Solo's chances of ever being redeemed." Then he limped away, head down and vanished into his cabin. The young woman stared at him and resolve crystallised within her.

If there was any way to grant Rey and Ben the peace and chance at happiness they deserved, Rose would do everything in her power to make sure it happened.


	23. Twenty Three

**Twenty Three**

He could sense they were approaching Dathomir, the sense of the place dark and powerful enough to rouse him from his scrutiny of the Holocron in his quarters. He had been holed up for almost the entire journey from Mustafar, hiding from the others and from his misdeeds. He knew that everyone had questions for him-whether hostile, like Poe and Zorii, or more concerned like Rose and maybe Finn. But he had no mind to answer them, no heart either-for everything he had was being marshalled in resisting the siren call of the Holocron and in preparing for the inevitable to come.

Hunched forward, the sickly yellow light of the Holocron reflecting on his features and emphasising the deep shadows under his dark eyes and the exhaustion on his face, he ran his fingers through his raven hair. He hadn't slept, guilt and desperation driving him on along with a fear that if he slept and his guards dropped, he would be vulnerable to the incessant whispers of the Holcron. So he hunched over a screen, skating through the intelligence and finding what he needed. But as he read through the conditions, he felt his heart sink. He had never expected the process of resurrecting Rey, of plucking her spirit back from the Force to be difficult but what he had read made his blood run cold and he knew…he knew that this was the Universe's final way of repaying him.

_But I owe her. I let her die. No…I let her expend her energy saving me and then I couldn't return the favour when she was killed by the effort of slaying the Emperor and saving us all. And I love her._

_Kriff. She called me her best friend. She's someone who is so full of light, so full of life-even though she's dead-and she has wonderful, loyal friends who are even willing to help me if it offers a chance to bring her back. And yet she calls me her best friend._

_I don't deserve her. I never did. But I certainly don't now._

_But I have to. I have to accept the sacrifice because I will never have any rest, any peace anyway. At least my life can mean something now._

He sat back and closed down the screen. The words were imprinted in his brain and he just wanted to try to meditate, to focus his energies for this one, final task. Somewhere, just beyond the veil of sight, Rey was waiting in the Force, hovering close to her body which had been taken by the Dark forces that wanted to use her to be reborn. They knew that she deserved life and that he would cross the Galaxy to rescue her. He could sense Hux's ship, closing on their position, his mind petty and venal and bright with hatred. And he could feel the strands of his life, pulling tighter and tighter around him until it almost felt that he was suffocating.

He closed his eyes.

Sleep was overrated.

Sleep was for the dead.

-o0o-

Rose hadn't slept well either-because there was a sense of foreboding that was nagging her. Ren-or _Ben_ as she was now thinking of him-had implied that the process to get Rey back wouldn't be easy or safe and she found herself wondering what it would actually involve. A nagging voice warned her that Poe would be less than receptive, since he had been in a very strange mood since the escape from Mustafar. And what she had overheard of Ben and Rey talking-how improbable was that?-convinced her that the two were in love. She groaned.

How could she convince anyone who hadn't witnessed that tender conversation that Kylo Ren, the Supreme Leader of the First Order and genocidal monster, was in love with Rey, the Last Jedi and would do anything to rescue her? Even from death.

She sat up and ran her hands over her face. Finn was one hope because he had been convinced by the man. But Poe was still wavering and Zorii, Jannah and Beau were unconvinced. Chewbacca…well, the Wookiee seemed to have forgiven Ben for his horrible deeds, including murdering his own father, Chewie's closest friend but how would he react to Ben's plan?

Whatever it was.

Realising that sleep would evade her for now, she got up, freshened up and wandered to the tiny kitchen to get what passed for caff, then she slowly made her way to the crew area, finding Finn dozing at the table. Quietly, she sat down but his eyes snapped open and he looked up, blinking owlishly. She smiled.

"Sorry," she murmured then pushed her cup towards him. "I think you need this more than I do." But he pushed it back and stretched.

"I can get my own," he reassured her, yawning again. "Trouble sleeping?" She nodded as he got up and sped off to fetch his own drink. She sipped the steaming liquid, waiting until he returned with his own mug, handing her a protein bar then starting one of his own.

"More like…too much on my mind," she murmured. Finn sighed.

"Poe's furious," he revealed. "You heard what he said? That Ren used the Force to make him move the Falcon away from danger?" Rose sipped her caff again.

"Sounds like he saved the ship," she commented.

"By abusing Poe!" Finn reminded her sternly. "We're supposed to be better than that."

"I know," she murmured, her eyes drifting in the direction of Ben's cabin. As she watched, a porg waddled down the corridor. Somehow, the ship was still infested with the fat noisy birds from Ahch-To and Rose wondered if Chewie really minded that much. She put her cup slowly down.

"Finn," she murmured. "Do you think he will still help get Rey back?" His eyes widened.

"I don't know," he confessed. "He's torn. He wants to help Rey because he is her friend and she gave everything to end the war and the Emperor. And because getting her back would make it feel so much more like a victory. But if it means making himself vulnerable to Ren…I'm not sure he can trust him. Not now."

"If it's any consolation, I think he didn't mean it," Rose murmured. "It was…a mistake."

"A mistake is putting on the wrong socks, not taking over someone's mind!" Finn told her sharply.

"He loves Rey-and he wants her back," Rose reminded him and he started.

"How…?"

"I saw them. I saw her," she told him in a low voice.

"What?"

"It's the Bond they have," Rose explained. "He was talking to someone…and then suddenly, he was hugging her. It was private and I didn't mean to eavesdrop but he warned her that it was dangerous, that she would have to fight for her existence-against whatever was there."

"And I meant it," Ben said, emerging with a cup of caff of his own. Rose and Finn stared: he had managed to patch up the black General's tunic he had been given on _the Finalizer_ and the cloak and he looked unnervingly like Kylo Ren once more.

"How?" Finn asked. Ben sighed and sat next to Rose.

"Dathomir is a dangerous place," he said quietly. "For a very long time, it was ruled by the Nightsisters, Force-wielding witches who had immense power but who tended to concentrate on their own affairs."

"I never heard of them," Finn confessed.

"Me neither," Rose added.

"They're all dead now," Ben added. "Killed by General Grievous. There are still rumours of ghosts there. But the Nightsisters possessed magics that could resurrect the dead. The Holocron details some-but not all. However, it says there is a site, high on a plateau where there is an altar. A resurrection alter that the Empire never destroyed. That will be where Rey is. That will be where we have to go. But there is danger-for anyone involved."

"You too?" Finn asked, trying to keep any snarkiness from his voice. Ben nodded, the shadows deep under his eyes.

"Especially me," he sighed. "Nothing is for free. And to bring back a person, to restore life, there is a high price tag. And I have to check that you would be willing to pay what is asked."

"That depends on what you're asking," Poe said coldly, emerging from the cockpit and leaning against the door. "I'm not letting my guard down near you again. Ever." The others slowly joined them, roused by voices and all yawned, stretched and looked variously dishevelled, half asleep or chipper.

"And who you're asking," Beau added. "I wasn't that close to Rey. Maybe saw her a few times…"

"And I only met her on Kef Bir briefly before she ran," Jannah added.

"She was cool," Zorii added. "But my interactions with her were limited as well. Though she was clearly a brave, caring, compassionate warrior who would risk anything to end the First Order." BB-8 gave a stream of frantic beeps and even Ben allowed a watery smile to tilt his lips.

"Then it has to be you three," he said, turning to inspect Poe, Finn and Rose. "You knew her best. You were her friends. And thus you have the most to offer-and to sacrifice."

"What do you mean?" Finn asked suspiciously as Ben sighed.

"The only way to bring her back is to offer life for life," he admitted. "That was what I tried to do on Exegol. I tried to give her my life, all my energy to bring her back when she had died defeating Palpatine. But I wasn't able to do it. Maybe because the Force was unwilling to accept my sacrifice…or it had other plans for me…or more likely, that I am not skilled enough in Force healing because I have been mired in the Dark Side for so long. Healing is a Light Side ability…" He clasped his hands together. "It would have been easier if I could just have given her my life energy and died but here we are."

They all stared at him. There was no sarcasm or dissembling in his voice and Poe found himself frowning.

"Where are we exactly?" he asked shortly.

"There are incantations that must be said over Rey's body, on the altar on Dathomir," he said evenly. "And we must all sacrifice parts of her life to bring her back."

"What exactly do you mean?" Finn demanded rising.

"Finn…" Rose's voice was firm though her face was concerned. Ben stared at the floor.

"You will have to sacrifice your friendship, all your memories of her," he revealed wretchedly. "She will have to give up the thing she loves-me. And I…" He swallowed. "I give up the Light. I say the incantation and then I surrender to the Dark Side. The Bond shatters and I lose everything I sacrificed everything for. My parents, my place in the First Order…everything. But…" He looked up. "I do it gladly because I owe it to her."

"Because you love her," Rose murmured. The others all stared at her. Poe rounded on Ben but he froze as he saw the former Supreme Leader's head down, his cheeks faintly flushed. He shook his head.

"Oh, this is just too crazy," he muttered. "First Order Supreme Leader and the Last Jedi. No one would believe that."

"They might if they watched it for themselves," Rose suddenly suggested and gestured. "BB-8 can record it. He can document everything that happens, from us landing to…whatever the outcome. And it's probably more important because if Ben is right, we won't even know Rey when she returns."

"No," Ben said quietly and to their surprise, his eyes were shining with unshed tears. "And that will hurt her more than anything."

"What…?" Finn asked and then he slumped back in his seat. "Oh."

"What?" Poe asked, frowning.

"Rey spent fifteen years waiting for her family to return," Ben said guiltily. "She eventually accepted that she had been abandoned but it took an enormous effort to let go her hope that they would one day return. She believes that people will always abandon her, that she is somehow unloveable. Yet she has you all as friends…and someone, no matter how wretched or broken, who loves her." He looked up. "But to bring her back, we strip her friends of all memories of those friendships, she loses the reassurance of her love and of the Dyad Bond we share. We will make her feel abandoned and alone. _Betrayed._ And you…will never know what you have surrendered. But she will. And it will hurt her." Finn flung his arm across his eyes.

"Kriff," he murmured. Rose was shaking her head.

"We can't…" she breathed. "How can we do that to her when she has already given so much…?"

"Then she stays dead," Ben sighed. "And all of this will be for nothing."

"No-you have to find another way!" Finn yelled, jumping to his feet. "You can't make me give her up. She was one of my first friends. My sister. I-I love her as well…" Then he looked over at Rose and then at Poe. "Just not like that," he admitted in a small voice.

"Believe me, I have searched everything on the Holocron, trying to find some way not to do this,' he breathed. "I knew that it would be dangerous-because Snoke's ghost is still here. He's been in the Force, haunting me and waiting for his chance. And he will try to seize Rey's body and live again."

"Which is why we need to be there as well," Finn realised. "In case the wrong person comes through."

"And BB-8 who will know who Rey is-and who may be able to talk some sense into our thick skulls," Poe finally conceded. "You know, for the record, I hate this plan."

"Duly noted," Ben replied with equal sarcasm.

"But in the absence of a sane plan to raise our friend from the dead, this is the only option we have," Poe decided and then he looked at his friends. "But this involves all of you. Those of us who will be going in-and the rest of you who will have to watch over the ship and make sure General Hugs doesn't sneak up on us. We know he's after Ren and from previous experience, he's likely to stumble in at the crucial moment and ruin everything. So can I rely on you all to do this?"

There was a pause.

"You can rely on me, flyboy!" Zorii said first, her voice determined.

"Count me in," Beau added, smiling. "Though I think we've got the hard part, since none of you will remember why the kriff any of you are there!"

"I'm in," Jannah added. Behind them, Chewie gave a yowl, his tone indication he was in for the long haul.

"I'm in," Finn," confirmed.

"And me. Always," Rose added.

BB-8 gave a long stream of excited beeps.

"Thanks, buddy," Poe chuckled. "I'm in." Then he turned his eyes to the last shape. Ben closed his eyes.

"I will give everything including my life to get her back," he promised. They all stared at him and Rose gently rested a hand on his arm.

"I hope it won't come to that," she murmured. He gave her a watery smile.

"I rather think that's exactly what will happen," he said.

-o0o-

They landed on the nearest flat ground close to the plateau that Ben had identified as the place where the altar was sited. The roiling sky was glowering down at the jagged mountains and the dark earth, marred by a continuous twisted spiny thicket of alien vegetation. The Falcon remained prepped to fly and Chewie, Janna, Beau and Zorii stayed on board, on alert. Beau had made a few calls to the Resistance along with Poe before they had set out and the General had appeared smug when he finally joined the party heading up to try to retrieve Rey.

Finn and especially Rose were shocked to see Ben dressed once more as Kylo Ren, the cloak and cowl drawing scowls from Poe as he muttered under his breath before they struck out. Ben was focussed on the way ahead, the thorny vegetation slashing at their legs and ripping at the hem of his cloak. The Sith Holocron and the lightsaber were clipped to his belt and his long legs ate up the ground, leaving the others trailing in his wake with BB-8 faithfully rolling along, determinedly documenting everything that had happened. Lightning speared through the sky, the shifting shadows making the already menacing place seem even more eerie. Rose stuck close to Finn as the plateau rose ahead of them.

"Are you alright?" she murmured as the former stormtrooper's brow furrowed. He paused, then shook his head.

"This place…" he murmured. "I can feel a whispering, shushing in my head."

"The Nightsisters," Ben murmured, jumping over a gulley. He craned his neck to look up the steep slope. "They are all dead-but their ghosts still remain, though few can sense them now." He gave a grim smile. "One of the downsides of being Force sensitive."

"Yeah, it's not all lightsaber battles and lifting rocks," Finn muttered and Ben quietly chuckled.

"Great power, great responsibility," he murmured. "And great risk. Because I can also sense Snoke."

"The former Supreme Leader?" Finn frowned as they began to scale the slope. Ben nodded, stalking steadily on.

"Dead but not gone," he commented, accelerating up the slope. The others trudged after him, glancing around the hostile environment. Rose felt the hairs standing up on the back of her neck as she glanced around.

"Someone is watching us," she murmured.

"I know," Poe muttered, glancing up. "And I'll bet General Hugs has arrived as well."

"The problems just keep piling up," Finn grumbled then glanced ahead. "And I-I'm not sure I can do this." He paused and trudged on for a few steps. "Rey…she's one of my closest friends. And I really don't have that many friends. How-how can I just give up all my memories of her and just _forget_ one of the most important people in my life?" Poe rested a hand on his shoulder as they paused, almost at the top of the plateau.

"I understand," he said. "Since she first showed up at D'Qar, I knew she was someone special. And though I didn't get to spend as much time with her as I did with you, I know she's a great person. She didn't hesitate to do what was needed to save us all on Exegol. So we owe her…to do whatever we have to so that she gets her chance." Offering a few beeps in agreement, the little droid rolled to the top of the plateau and gave an astonished beep. The others quickly joined him to see Ben standing stock-still, his eyes dark with emotion before he ran forward and knelt by a low stone altar on which lay the motionless body of Rey.

-o0o-

**_A/N: I'm referring to Ben as Ben when he's Light and Kylo Ren when he's Dark._ **


	24. Twenty Four

**_A/N: I'm referring to Ben as Ben when he's Light and Kylo Ren when he's Dark._ **

**-o0o-**

**Twenty Four**

Lightning tore the sky, the roar of thunder surrounding the four humans and one droid as they clustered around the black basalt altar and the white-clad shape lying supine and unspoilt. Rey was as she had fallen, dressed in the white that she always felt uncomfortable in, her hair in its unique three buns and beautiful, lightly-freckled face in repose. Her lips were still a greyish colour but otherwise, she could just be asleep. Clipped to her hip was Leia's lightsaber and her staff lay alongside her side. Another burst of lightning washed all the colour from her face as Ben bowed his head.

"I'm sorry it took so long," he groaned.

 _It's okay,_ she told him. _You're here now._

His head snapped up and he danced around, as if expecting to see her, but there was only the raging Dathomir sky. Finn frowned.

"Rey?" he murmured and Ben's head snapped round, his brows dipping.

"You can hear her?" he asked, his tone verging on jealousy. Silently, Finn nodded, his face pale.

"So could I," Rose mumbled and Poe nodded as well. Frowning, the former Supreme Leader rose to his feet and peered at the Holocron, strengthening his mental shields to suppress the vicious whispers that swirled around him.

_Traitor._

_Weakling._

_Failure._

_Pathetic boy._

_You are nothing._

_The act designed to make you stronger, whole, instead has riven you to the bone._

His eyes snapped wide and he spun, hearing Snoke's words, Snoke's voice. The malignant presence was swirling around him, causing him to flinch as memories of so many punishments-some earned and many not-reared up. His hand instinctively dropped to his lightsaber, even though he knew it would be useless against the ghost. Breathing hard, he jammed the Holocron into a depression on the altar and looked at the others.

"You okay, Ren?" Poe asked as he nodded.

"Are you?" he asked. The General looked over at his friends.

"I think we all are," he said. "Whatever it takes to bring Rey back. She slew the Emperor and saved us all on Exegol."

"She's my sister," Finn said firmly.

"And my friend," Rose added. BB8 gave a little volley of beeps that added his determination. Nodding, Ben turned to the silent body and leaned forward, pressing his lips lightly to her forehead. Then he pulled back and murmured a few words that he had memorised from the Sith Holocron. The lightning howled and the other three flinched.

_What are you doing?_

Ben frowned, seeing a ghostly shape, shimmering on the limits of his vision. She was tall, over two metres with her elongated shape typical of a Nightsister, her robes stained with blood. He gestured.

"I thought it was obvious, Mother Talzin," he said, recognising the ghost. Her eyes narrowed.

_We have been betrayed by the Sith before._

"I am not Sith," he asserted, his voice lowering to a growl.

_You look like a Sith. You act like a Sith. You even dress like one._

"And yet…I helped Rey, this woman, destroy Palpatine, Darth Sidious," he told her. "The Sith are no more. Nor are the Jedi. All is dust. All is balance."

_You use a Sith artefact. You carry a Jedi lightsaber._

"I am not meant to live," he told her. "She is. She is the last Jedi-but she is a balance of Light and Dark. She is the Balance. She is the one who accepted all the Jedi and spent her life to defeat Palaptine. She deserves the life, not me."

_You understand the dangers?_

"I welcome them," he said quietly.

_You are soaked in Darkness and blood. They follow you. Your nemesis waits. You know what must be done? You understand the price?_

"I understand," he affirmed, feeling her presence recede. Then he gestured. By Rey's feet, a single spike of metal jutted up, the edges still wickedly sharp. "Touch that and think of Rey," he advised. There was a momentary pause and then Finn walked forward. He opened his hand, jabbed it against the metal and murmured 'Rey'. Poe's approach was more swaggering, though his expression was just as serious. Finally Rose walked up to press her hand to the spine, the red gleam of blood dull in the gloomy light. She closed her eyes.

"Come back, Rey," she breathed.

Ben nodded-and then he suddenly gestured, his hand flying out to suddenly freeze them in place. All three tried to struggle, instinct fighting against any trust for the man who had brought them here. Poe's eyes were filled with accusation but Ben shook his head, feeling their anger through the Force. Even Rose was looking at him as if he was a monster…but that was okay because what he was doing was monstrous. Quietly, he land his hand over Rey's stilled heart, fingers splayed over her cold shape

…Poe twitched, recalling the brilliant smile on the women who fought at his side, the scavenger who repaired ships, fought like a demon, trained like a Jedi…who he had seen first as the hesitant, almost-broken young woman emerging from _the Millennium Falcon_ , her eyes shimmering with tears as she approached the newly-widowed Leia, sharing her pain and her guilt at preventing the murder of Han Solo…

…Finn's heart broke as he recalled her hug after they had been reunited, her gratitude as he came back for her on Starkiller…and the young woman he had first seen on Jakku, beset by two thugs but who handled herself with ferocity to release herself and the droid before she chased him down and dumped him on his ass, accusing him of stealing a jacket…

…Rose's eyes shone with tears as she recalled the woman who had sought her out as a fellow female, a comrade in the garages, a friend who had willingly shared her story with the grieving mechanic; the girl she had first met when she woke from her coma, sitting by Finn and greeting her with a shy but brilliant grin as the shattered remains of the Resistance headed for safety…

…images blanking like old holos being erased…

Ben looked up, seeing the sky almost on fire with lightning and ships descending through the atmosphere, the uniform minds of stormtroopers focussed on their missions as they came in for landing.

"Hux," he growled, feeling the confusion and fury of his three prisoners. Gently, he lifted Rey's hand and jabbed the skin onto the spine. "I'm sorry, Rey," he murmured. "But for you to live, you have to give up something as well." He lowered her back into position. "And you give up our bond, our connection…and everything that comes from it."

_Our love._

He staggered and almost fell, feeling the link severed, the ends flailing wildly, blackness beyond. The sudden sense of dislocation, of pain and loss and loneliness almost unendurable. And he realised that he had always felt her, even after her death…but this was the final loss he had feared. He was truly alone.

He had never felt so alone.

Finally, staring up into the sky, he blinked. This was the hardest. Alone, with only the corpse of the woman he had loved and who had saved him-saved them all-he had to give up the Light he had worked so hard to regain. He had to surrender. Ben Solo had to die.

He swallowed, then jabbed his hand on the metal, feeling the keen edge bite into his skin. Briefly, he touched her chest one last time.

"Goodbye," he whispered and dropped his shields.

The Darkness flooded in.

-o0o-

Rey watched, stunned as she witnessed her friends imprisoned by Ben and forced to participate in some strange ritual. But when she saw him say goodbye and felt the Darkness swirl around him once more, she screamed.

But there was a light, a pathway and an almost irresistible force, pulling her back down and into her body, the sudden feeling of light and warmth…

…and cold and evil as she sensed another presence-the foul, cruel individual that she recognised from the Throne Room. The mind that had brutally and irresistibly tortured her, laying everything bare and slicing her open for fun. The same psyche that had controlled and groomed and moulded Ben into Kylo Ren, tormenting and training him until he became his weapon and enforcer… _Snoke_ …

He was there, his acidic, icy presence occupying the same space as her as she fought for the possession of her own body. Snoke was powerful, vicious and ruthless but she wasn't the same person that had faced him a year earlier. She had faced Palpatine, possessed the power of all the Jedi within her and she had honed her powers so that she was far more powerful than he could have imagined. So as he descended, she drew on all her energies, calling for the powers of the Jedi she had met.

_Be with me. Please._

She felt Luke and Leia, Anakin, Yoda, Obi Wan Kenobi, Mace Windu, Qui-Gon Jinn…and others she couldn't name but had felt before on Exegol…all electrified with the power, she flung the challenger aside, shaking off his attempts at Force lightning and burning away his darkness as she dived home. The body was hers, in tune with her soul and she felt it coming up to reach her, welcoming her back. His howls of rage filled her ears as she felt her heart beat again, the momentary weakness and disorientation filling her.

Her eyes snapped open and she took a breath.

-o0o-

Poe Dameron felt himself released, collapsing to his knees on the rocky plateau on an alien world.

_Dathomir? How did he know that? How did he even come to be here?_

What he did know was that his friends Rose Tico and fellow General Finn were at his side, looking as confused as he did. What he did know was that, despite the fact that the First Order and Palpatine had been defeated and the Resistance had won, Kylo Ren was standing a few yards in front of them, standing over the body of a young woman dressed in white on what looked like an altar.

Poe felt his face pull back in a leer of disgust. He had travelled widely and been in all sorts of unusual and precarious situations in his work as a top Resistance pilot and agent-and before-and to him, this looked like some sort of arcane sacrifice that he had vaguely heard about in some of the remote and primitive worlds of the Outer Rim and the Unknown Regions. It was almost as if Ren was trying to slay the young woman-who seemed to have a lightsaber clipped to her belt-as some sort of sacrifice.

His hand automatically snapped to his blaster and as he looked, she took a deep breath and her eyes snapped wide open. She looked around wildly, her eyes falling on the dark shape of Ren and her lips parted in a gasp. Instinctively, he drew and fired, trying to keep the Supreme Leader away from the young woman. There was something familiar about her-had she been part of the Resistance at one time?-but she was vulnerable and at Ren's mercy. The Supreme Leader glowered and his hand snatched a lightsaber from his belt, deflecting Poe's shots. Rose and Finn joined in, trying to protect the young woman, the young Jedi. Then, Ren's hand swung up and flung them all back, their weapons skittering from their hands.

But as he turned away, the young woman rolled off the altar, her hand snatching at her lightsaber.

"Get away from them, you monster!" she spat as the green blade ignited. "Poe, Finn, Rose-are you okay?" The General blinked and stared over at Finn.

"Sorry…who…?" he began as she glanced over at them.

"Poe-this isn't funny," she said in exasperation. "Get back. I can handle him!"

Ren gave a grim smile.

"You can't," he said shortly, his eyes dark with anger.

"Murderous snake!" she spat, eyes sparkling with anger. "What have you done to them?"

"You should worry about yourself," he told her equably, the lightsaber humming as he circled around her. Unconsciously, he rolled his wrist and the small movement merely emphasised his skills with the weapon. "I can sense the First Order ships approaching. Soon, you will be at my side-as my student or as my slave…"

"NEVER!" she shouted and leapt at him, the impact knocking him back a few paces. His eyes glittered with an unreadable emotion as the three Resistance officers tried to understand what had happened. Quietly, BB-8 rolled towards them and offered a stream of worried beeps, causing Poe to stare at him.

"Whaddya mean 'Friend Rey' needs our help?" he asked, glancing to the others. There was a pause as they all shared looks.

"She's fighting Ren and she seems to know us," Finn murmured. "I know Ren can do all sorts of weird stuff with the Force-apart from choking people, throwing them around like dolls…"

"Ransacking their minds," Poe growled, his eyes darkening.

"You think he's done something to us?" Rose asked, her eyes troubled. She felt as if there was something very important she had forgotten to do…

"I think that is exactly what he's done," Finn said decisively, scrambling through his own memory to find out the truth. Something felt very off. "But she's fighting him and she seems to know us. BB-8 knows her. I say we help her bring him down!" Poe nodded, scrabbled for his blaster and fired again at the Supreme Leader. This time, Ren grabbed the blaster bolt, holding it motionless and a very familiar memory swirled around him…

_…_ _a burning village, an old man cut down by the demon in a mask, capture, torture, escape, crash, return, reunion, a world consumed by fire, a world become a weapon, flying inside an Oscillator, the planet breaking apart, landing back on D'Qar, the Millennium Falcon landing…_

…nothing…

"He did tamper with our memories," he growled and fired again. Ren ducked and the energy shot past his head, exploding a rock behind him. His face twisted in fury and he gestured, the Force tossing them around. But Poe was up on his feet again, grabbing Rose's blaster and firing-as Ren gestured and the General found himself suddenly wrenched off his feet, something gripping him by the neck. He found it almost impossible to breathe, his throat being crushed by some unseen hand. But as he watched, Ren raised his hand, the clawed position tightening slowly and inexorably.

"NO! GET OFF HIM!" Rey yelled, leaping forward. Unexpectedly fast, her saber slashed across his shoulder and he grunted in pain, turning away to face her. Poe fell to the ground like an unstrung puppet, gasping desperately for air as Finn sped to his side.

"Poe!" he breathed. "You okay?" The former pilot gave a weak nod, a hand pressed tenderly to his throat.

"Been better," he rasped. "That never happened before…"

_Even when you faced him in the interrogation chamber._

Finn looked up, seeing the young woman and Ren fighting expertly with lightsabers, the hum and clash of the weapons loud above the rising breeze and lightning. Rose dropped to a crouch by the two men, handing them back their blasters.

"If we know her, if he's affected our minds, then we owe it to her to help her," she said in a determined voice.

"You want to get in between them, then go ahead," Finn commented, gesturing to the ferocious battle. "Personally, I think we should be ready to help if we can…"

"You've been practicing," Ren told her, his eyes dark with contemplation.

"We've been fighting ever since we met," she spat. "I have never lost."

"Until now," he told her, his tone darkening. "Because I wasn't trying to kill you."

_Why?_

"You killed Snoke," she growled, parrying and matching his attack. He was taller, heavier and stronger than she was, his blows powerful and reach longer. But she was fast, lithe and furious, her access to the Dark Side instinctive and lending her the strength and skill to match him.

"Sith always kill their masters to assume the throne," he told her.

"You're not Sith," she spat.

"I'm standing on Dathomir with a Sith Holocron fighting a Jedi," he reminded her in a snarl. "What else would I be?"

_Ben. Your name is Ben._

"Han Solo's son," she breathed. "General Leia Organa's son."

"That man is dead," he spat. "He died on Starkiller Base."

_No…._

"I'm looking at him," she hissed, taking a step back, her lightsaber raised. "You're a monster."

"Yes. Yes, I am," he told her bitterly. "And you. You imagine spending some time with Luke makes you a Jedi?"

"He taught me what I needed to know," she retorted.

"You need a proper teacher," he reiterated, his eyes boring into hers. "I offered my hand to you twice. I offer it again-because I can sense the Darkness in you. I can help you reach your ultimate potential."

"By becoming someone who kills whatever is in her way? Like you?" she spat. He gave a small shrug.

"Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. And never be afraid to do what you have to so you can become what you were meant to be," he told her.

"You have taken my friends from me!" she screamed, her pain flailing around. He almost recoiled, an unexpected sense of shame stabbing through his chest before he crushed the feeling.

"Attachments make you weak," he told her shortly.

"Love strengthens you," she retorted.

"So lonely," he taunted her. "So alone. Clinging on for years and years, scratching marks on a rusting wall in the hope your dead parents would come back for you. They sold you! They were never coming back. But you had to cling to them, when you could have left and made so much more of your life."

"And I would never have honed my skills or been in the right place at the right time to meet BB-8 and Finn," she told him flatly. "I would never had realised I possessed the Force, met Han, met Leia and met Luke. I would never have realised I had a place to belong. I would never have made friends. And I would never have been able to go to Exegol and slay Palpatine!"

"And die," he spat.

_How had he known that? Had he been there? He just couldn't recall anything…_

"Then why did you bring me back?" she snarled, her face twisted with fury.

He recoiled, his mouth hanging open as he struggled for words. The expression of rage looked so wrong on her and his heart tugged in a strange manner. Then he shook his head.

"I wasn't…" he tried and then frowned, circling around her. She matched his movement, pace for pace, her eyes never leaving his face.

"And where the kriff is your lightsaber?" she hissed.

He stilled, eyes drifting to the brilliant blue blade in his hand. The power hummed through his arm, the familiarity of this blade horrific.

It was the blade that had hovered over him all those years ago, the blade that had reflected in Luke's eyes as he saw the Darkness in his nephew's soul, as he made his judgement that Ben Solo was irredeemable. He, who had clung to the hope that even Darth Vader could be turned back to the light-and had achieved it-determined there was absolutely nothing worth saving in his sister's son, the young man who had been given into his care for all those years. Why had he abandoned him so badly when everyone else had rejected him? Was it any wonder that he had chosen the Darkness when everyone who was supposed to care for him, supposed to _love_ him had thrown him away like a broken tool?

He stared, eyes wide and he stumbled back. His confusion was palpable and Rey paused, feeling him brutally unbalanced. Voices were whispering in her mind that now was the time, while he was distracted, to strike the killing blow.

_…_ _waves higher than a freighter, crashing mercilessly over the wreckage of a death ship from an old war. Cold, spray, slick metal underfoot. The ghostly halo of red as he walked through the spray, his raven hair soaked. Eyes focussed only on her face. Furious exchanges, slowly wearing her down. Falling to her knees, and staring up, their bodies heaving with the effort. Distraction, the brush of Leia across his mind. Looking up, the red spitting lightsaber falling from his hand…_

_…_ _and caught by her hand to drive lethally through his body…_

"No," she mouthed, a pain striking her heart at the memory. _What had happened? How was he alive? He should be dead._ She backed up a step. "No."

_You are a disappointment, my apprentice._

Kylo Ren blinked. The voice of Snoke had him on edge, instinctive fear of his abusive master almost overwhelming his confusion and the knowledge that Snoke was dead.

"I killed you."

_You are conflicted. Pathetic. A boy hiding in a mask. A child playing at being a monster._

"I AM A MONSTER!"

_The girl is still your superior._

"I CAN DEFEAT HER!"

_No. You cannot. I should have chosen her._

"YOU CHOSE ME!" he screamed.

Rey recoiled, watching him unravelling before her eyes. He was screaming at nothing, at a hallucination that his deranged mind was supplying. She backed up another step and reached to get her staff to fly to her hand...and then she felt it: a pricking at the back of her head. The temperature dropped precipitously and the wind rose further.

And then, above the altar, the attenuated and malevolent shape of Snoke coalesced. He lifted his misshapen head, his pallid blue eyes sweeping over his raging apprentice. Then, chillingly, he grinned a death's head smile.

"I'm back."


	25. Twenty Five

**Twenty Five.**

Snoke rose to his full height, towering over the assembled watchers, his eyes cold and filled with contempt. Rey backed away, her lightsaber raised as the shape turned his ire onto the dark shape of his murderer. Kylo Ren backed up, his eyes wide and saber raised. To Rey's eye, he was breathing faster than normal and appeared…shocked. Almost panicked.

"I killed you," he breathed.

"I know," Snoke growled. "You were very skilled, my apprentice. Almost worthy of my praise. You finally conquered your doubt and fear, the conflict that had riven you for years-but for her!" The word was spat as Rey backed up further. Yet Snoke's attention was focussed on the dark shape of Ren.

"It was the only choice," Ren said, though his voice was doubtful.

_Why? Why was doing the unthinkable so necessary when I know what he can do?_

"You are WEAK!" Snoke roared, looming. "You did exactly what I planned: allowing her to see your conflict through the Bond, baring your soul, letting her think that you could be turned because you are so riven…and then betraying her!"

Ren's eyes flicked up at the almost inaudible gasp that Rey gave. The words gave him a sudden pang of pain, though he couldn't recall the incident in detail. He recalled the focus, the fact he stood over her with his saber in his hand, his other hand subtly turning his grandfather's lightsaber on the arm of Snoke's throne. Of making the decision…

_…_ _WHY?…_

…and igniting the lightsaber through Snoke's body, slicing him in two before he could even call out. Of sparing Rey who was held helpless before him, presented to him for him to slaughter like a sacrificial lamb.

Rey who he had never truly tried to kill since Starkiller.

"What Bond?' he asked. Snoke loomed closer.

"The Bond I forged between you to allow your minds to touch…" he sneered and then he narrowed his eyes, driving his mind through Ren's, brutally reaming the man's mind. A claw-like, elongated hand moved slightly as he tore through memories.

Kylo Ren screamed. The watchers-even Poe-winced at the sound and Rey danced round to crouch by her friends.

"Are you alright?" she murmured. Finn nodded.

"Yeah," he conceded. "Um…"

"You don't know who I am, do you?" she realised, seeing the confusion in their eyes. Pain wracked her heart at the loss of these people, who she loved as the family she had adopted in place of those who had abandoned her. Rose shook her head.

"Ren did something to our minds," she apologised. "And I am sure that somehow…we will remember. But for now, we trust you, Jedi…" She paused and with a stab of grief, Rey realised that Rose-loving, lovely Rose-couldn't even recall her name.

"Rey," she said through a thick throat. "Rey of Jakku."

 _Because I will never claim the name that I have. I will never be known as Rey Palpatine._ Rose gifted her a bright smile.

"I'm Rose," she said "And I'm pleased to meet you…again…Rey," she said.

"Poe Dameron," he said, his eyes wary and still fingering his throat. "Thanks for the save, by the way." Rey offered the briefest flash of her brilliant smile.

"You're welcome," she said. Finn eyed her sorrowfully.

"Finn," he murmured. "Sorry. I-I sense that…you're very sad about…all of this…" She sighed.

"It's okay," she lied. "When we get off this rock, we can…catch up, I guess?" Accepting this, the former stormtrooper nodded. "But now, I would be much happier if you got away from here. Snoke and B…Ren are too powerful for you to stop. If you stay here, you'll get killed." Poe frowned.

"Lemme get this straight," he said, frowning. "You came back from the dead. Now Snoke came back from the dead. Who's next? Palpatine? Darth Vader?"

 _"_ _Funny you should say that,"_ an unfamiliar voice said. Rey's head snapped up as the others stared. They could sense a vague shape but to the young woman, the familiar form of Anakin coalesced. Lightning turned the sky a fearsome red and struck the ground, mere feet from the altar.

 _"_ _This is unexpected,"_ he commented. Rey frowned.

"Very," she murmured, her eyes trained on the two former Supreme Leaders. "Is he really back? Is Snoke alive again?"

 _"_ _Dathomir is a very…unique place,"_ he conceded. " _The Nightsisters had the strange powers they accessed through the Force-which included the ability to raise the dead. This place is lousy with Force magic. And the combination of the altar and the Holocron have allowed Snoke to fashion a new body for himself."_

"Can he be stopped?" Rey hissed urgently.

 _"_ _You really don't recall anything about my grandson?"_ he asked, crouching down to look her in the eye.

"Who…?"

 _"_ _Ben Solo. Kylo Ren,"_ he reminded her.

"No. Except he's a monster, a patricide, a murderer…"

 _"_ _He's your soul mate,"_ he told her sternly. _"You share…shared…a Force Bond. You are a Dyad, two souls joined, two that are one. It is how you defeated Palpatine."_

"That's impossible!" she spat. "I would remember…" He shook his head.

 _"_ _You lost your memories of him as the price for your resurrection,"_ he revealed. " _His sacrifice was greater. You saved him, Rey. You spared his life when you dealt him a mortal blow when you fought him…"_

**_…_ _the waves, crashing over them, lightsabers-blue and red-clashing amid the freezing spray…_ **

"I-I don't…"

_"_ _He fought with you. He turned to the Light. He has fought so hard to remain the man you believed in: Ben Solo. His sacrifice was to surrender everything he has gained: the Light, his memories of you, the Force Bond you shared, his love…"_

She recoiled.

"You're wrong!" she spat. "He's a vile monster. He killed his own father. He made his choice to seek power rather than choose his family!"

 _"_ _Of course, you know best,"_ Anakin told her, his tone disappointed. " _But together, you can defeat Snoke, Separately, you will both fall and he will rise once more…"_

She blinked at his tone but he was already gone.

 _You trust him,_ she reminded herself, then glanced at her friends. They were staring at her with surprise and more than a little wariness. "Get back!" she snapped. "This is beyond you! Get down and make sure you are safe. I can't concentrate on defeating him if I am having to keep half an eye on you!" There was a pause and the three nodded, retreating down the slope as she spun in her crouch and turned to face the confrontation.

Ren was on his knees, Snoke looming over him and brutally ravaging his mind. A memory flashed back, of her own interrogation, of the way he had prised her defences apart. And though she knew instinctively he was as cruel and determined as Snoke, she knew that he also possessed excellent shields so Snoke's invasion had to be backed by much greater power and cruelty. And the look on the monster's face made her shudder, for he was clearly relishing the torture.

_The Force Bond you shared…_

Yet there was no connection, nothing between them. She would have thought that something so special and unique couldn't just be sundered. The way Anakin had said the words implied a level of special that was beyond important. But glancing back at the rigid black-clad shape, she didn't need any Bond or connection to him to know he was in terrible pain: she could sense it through the Force. A large portion of her reminded her that he had inflicted as much pain-or even more-on countess others but there was a tiny part of her that reminded her that he was a human being and in pain…and that Snoke was the worse evil. And Anakin's words rolled around her head, however unwillingly.

Suddenly, Snoke dropped him, a vicious chuckle leaving his mouth.

"I had never imagined your betrayal, your weakness could be so overwhelming," he sneered. "Had I foreseen this, I would've left you to die after you escaped from Skywalker."

Ren was breathing heavily but Rey could almost feel the waves of hatred, radiating off his slumped shape.

"You hate me," Snoke sneered, leaning forward. Slowly, Ren raised his head.

"You encouraged me to hate everything," he breathed. "You made me a creature of anger and hatred. You stripped every other emotion from me. You promised me that killing my father would give me the clarity of purpose and strength I needed to silence all my doubts-and you betrayed me." He shoved himself up to his feet, his lightsaber in his hand, immediately pushing forward to lunge at the unarmed shape. But Snoke was ready, lightning pouring from his hand to slam the attacking shape, the blast flipping him end over end and slamming him right on the edge of the plateau. Stunned, he looked up as the lightsaber landed, yards away from his hand. Head ringing and body numb, he stared up at the monster who had seduced and moulded him into what he was. Snoke chuckled, stepping down from the altar and raising his hand again, to strike once more.

But Rey was in the way, parrying the lightning with her lightsaber, her eyes narrowed and an eerie sense of deja vu thrumming through her. Snoke burst out laughing, the wretched sound grating above the distant thunder.

"Even devoid of the Bond, she still comes to your rescue," he sneered. Balanced, her face set with anger, she never took her eyes from the tall shape but a slight gesture had the fallen lightsaber slapping into Ren's palm.

"Maybe I recall more than you think," she snapped, forcing her mind to clear. She knew that using some anger was helpful but allowing it to overwhelm her and cloud her judgement was a weakness. She was no longer the naive girl who had faced Snoke in his throne room on _the Supremacy_ but her instincts told her that he was just as strong here, on this desolate plateau. And Anakin's words had convinced her that there was not going to be the same level of help available facing Snoke as there was in combating Palpatine. "But do you recall what you are, Snoke?" The curl of her lip as she faced him was deliberately insulting. "Tell me-how does it feel to be nothing, just a mash-up, created in a petri dish to serve a rotting relic of a fallen regime? A relic I destroyed?"

His eyes grew colder and she could feel the darkness swirling around him. But behind her, she was aware that Kylo Ren was clambering to his feet, the lightsaber ignited in his hand. Tensing, she felt a flicker of relief as he stood alongside her, his saber raised.

"So you choose her over me-again?" he sneered. Ren's hand tightened on the metal, the blade directed straight towards the shape of Snoke.

"The Sith are gone," he ground out, his knuckles white. "She's right. You are a relic of a failed scheme to take back control. You are nothing!"

Lightning arched down at them, both from his hands and from the sky, the energy crackling around the pair. Teeth gritted, Rey angled her lightsaber and she felt Ren match her, deflecting the strike. Snoke started laughing, his next attack slamming both back.

_The Force Bond you shared._

She glanced over at the dark shape, seeing his dark hair falling across his pale features. He was the monster that had haunted her vision in Maz's castle, the creature that had killed his own father when Han Solo went to retrieve his son. He had tried to kill Finn and exterminate the Resistance on Crait. Luke had died to stop him. Leia had died to distract him. He had eliminated all of his family. _How could she be bonded to such a vile, treacherous snake?_

_Because you have your own darkness, your own heritage of evil._

She blinked, hearing his voice in her head.

_How can I hear you?_

_Your shields are pretty porous. I would have thought Luke would have taught you to shield better-especially since…_ There was the vaguest hint of regret in his tone. She ground her teeth.

 _Keep out of my mind!_ she snapped. _I've been dead for Force knows how long and this is all a lot to take it…_ She could almost feel a flicker of amusement from his end.

 _As you wish,_ he replied. _But it may help to co-ordinate against him. Because you are right: he cannot be allowed to live. There are First Order ships overhead, First Order stormtroopers closing on this position. And if we let him resume control, the Resistance will crumble._

 _I doubt that,_ she replied, taking station at his side, their lightsabers raised in unison. _But the Galaxy doesn't need any more conflict. The First Order is mostly disbanded or destroyed. And Snoke…is too dangerous to allow to live._

 _On that, we agree,_ he replied as Snoke lashed out at them again. He reached out for her, feeling hesitancy…but also a familiarity. He stole a glance at her, his dark eyes taking in the determination on her face, her nose scrunched as she frowned. He could feel the power surging in her, far more dominant and complex than it had been when they fought Snoke last. Even since Kef Bir when she defeated him…

_I wanted to take your hand. Ben's hand._

He blinked.

"You couldn't be weaker!" Snoke spat. "Still unable to stand on your own two feet, still craving for something more than you. My words, Vader's voice…and now the girl, a beacon of light to your darkness. And when she discards you…what then?"

Rey's hand shot out and clamped around his wrist, her saber crossing over his. Quietly, she closed her eyes and stealing a glance at her, he mirrored the action. Lightning webbed the sky and struck all around the attenuated, alien shape, causing the ground to turn to glass.

"Be with me," she murmured and she felt him brush gently against her mind. It was the opposite to their last encounter, a respectful request to join him rather than any species of attack. She took a breath and lowered her shields just enough to feel his mind rest against hers.

"Pathetic," Snoke condemned and drew up the lightning, the blackness of the Force drawing around him. But they were ready, the sabers reflecting the assault back so the energy scourged Snoke's shape. His howls mixed with their own cries as the Dark tore at them. But he was at her side, his strength supporting her own and when they struck, it was together. Snoke stumbled but did not fall, his scornful laugh echoing across the plateau. "Truly pitiful! Your ambition is worthy of your grandfather but your spirit…is weak as your worthless father."

She felt the surge of rage through the tentative link, the fury giving him power.

Anger was the easiest way to access the Dark Side, a path he had trodden so many times…and one she was not unfamiliar with. A part of her wanted to rage at Snoke as well but she needed to keep her head, remain calm and ready as Snoke struck again. Again, the lightning, the power boiled off the duality and she wondered how come she had never known they had this power. Or had she forgotten because she had died? Could Ren recall it? Why had Snoke created something that was such a danger to him?

But even as she thought it, he wrenched his arm away and flung himself forward, the saber swirling round and separating Snoke's head from his body. Further slashes carved his torso in two and disarticulated his legs from the remnants. In a rage, he brought the saber down on the Holocron and the altar, shattering them beyond repair. And then, breathing hard and eyes edged with red, he turned to her.

"Join me," he said, his voice tight with anger. "You are the heir to the Jedi and I the Sith. Between us, we can balance the Force and rule the Galaxy. It doesn't have to be First Order or Resistance. It just needs to bring order from chaos, peace from conflict, certainty…" He looked her in the eye and his voice dropped. "Please, Rey. Join me."

She backed away from him, her eyes wide with hurt and dismay. This seemed to be a bad dream, a deja vu that never seemed to end. Why couldn't he just for once acknowledge that his way was not the answer, that she couldn't sacrifice her friends, everything she believed in for his dead cause?

"I can't…" she whispered. "You know I can't. You've done…too much to ever be accepted as leader. You have killed too many, caused so much harm. Give it up…"

"NO!" he shouted, his face twisted with rage and betrayal. "I felt it then. Just for a moment-but we were together. I wasn't alone. You weren't alone. We were one. Rey…you have to understand…"

"NO!" she screamed at him. "You have to understand! I can't! Everything you stand for…is wrong! You rule and there will never be an end to conflict. You will cause resistance, rebels, whatever you call them to rise up against the evil Kylo Ren! You have to understand…it's impossible…"

His sabre was raised, the betrayal replaced by rage.

"Then you have chosen,' he said coldly. Rey raised her own weapon.

"Your time is over," she breathed.

He lunged forward, sabers clashing and energy boiling away. Sparks flew as the blades clashed again and again. They danced across the uneven surface, twisting and slashing, parries and lunges blocked.

"There is no one to save you now," he breathed. "No Luke, no Leia, no exploding planets or space battles or…"

"I don't need it," she bit out.

"You know your friends are lingering, refusing to go far?" he told her. "I feel them. And they will come charging back when you fall. Their deaths will follow your own."

"No," she breathed. "I told them to go."

"You know the traitor imagines he loves you?" he taunted her. "That he is worthy of a scavenger? I will enjoy finally killing him. And the girl. And the pilot…"

"You really are a monster!" she spat. "I had imagined…"

"You should get some new epithets!" he taunted her as her resolve crystallised in her chest. But a brief pang of pain hit at the same time, an eerie sense of dislocation and regret.

_I wanted to take Ben's hand. But not Kylo's. Never Kylo's._

She spun under his swipe, anger and fear for her friends surging through her veins, and then drove her lightsaber blade straight through his chest.

**-o0o-**

**A/N: Oops. For those of you who are worried, please recall there will be a happy ending. I'll just be hiding in this cave until the next update.**


	26. Twenty Six

**Twenty Six.**

Finn and Poe could see the white-armoured shapes advancing amid the twisted spiny vegetation, blasters raised and ready to fight. There were about a score, more than enough to overwhelm them and as he watched, Poe felt a miserable chill of deja vu. In fact, ever since Rey woke, the whole time he had this strong sensation that there was something important that he had forgotten.

"These guys never give up, do they?" he asked Finn as the former stormtrooper sighed.

"Always taught to carry on until the enemy is defeated or you are dead," he murmured. "No such thing as retirement or an old stormtrooper. Sometime, sooner or later, they all get killed. No wonder they have to kidnap all those kids. No chance a stormtrooper family-if such a thing could even exist-would suggest their own kids would go into the family profession." Poe stared at him and he began to chuckle.

"I have a feeling, buddy, that your kids aren't gonna be looking at stormtroopering as a career option," he grinned. Finn chuckled.

"No likelihood of kids," he murmured. Poe sighed.

"Plenty of orphaned children out there," he reminded his friend. "Including the latest ones stolen from their families by the First Order. We still gotta find them and bring them home." He rested a hand on Finn's shoulder. "And I'm with you every step of the way." Finn managed a wry smile.

"How do you feel about taking on about fifty stormtroopers with just three of us?" he said, hunkering down.

"Four," Poe reminded him. "We've got Rey." Finn raised his blaster.

"And she's busy fighting Ren," he murmured. "Who knows how long that will last?"

-o0o-

Rey stared in shock as she pulled back. the energy blade deactivating and leaving the seared hole in his body. Kylo Ren's eyes widened, his face taut with pain and eyes dark with…relief.

Appalled, ashamed, horrified, Rey backed away, her hand dropping and her lightsaber clattering to the ground. Her breath was freezing in her throat and she felt drained, the powerful surge of anger that had fuelled her assault leaving her drained and feeling…awful. But his eyes lingered on her with no recrimination. He clicked his lightsaber off and let the device fall to the rocky ground as his legs buckled and he collapsed back against the ruins of the altar. His head dropped to his chest and she could see the colour draining from his face and lips as his life ebbed.

_Wet. His hair should be wet._

She dropped to a crouch by him as his dark eyes flicked up to meet her face.

"I'm sorry," she said stupidly. He was her enemy, the monster who had stalked her since she became embroiled in the Resistance after meeting BB-8, the monster who had tortured her and fought her in the snows of Starkiller, the monster who had tried to exterminate the Resistance on the salt flats of Crait…

_…_ _the monster who had killed the other, worse monster aboard the Supremacy…_

_…_ _how had she gotten away again? All she came up with was…blackness…_

He raised his hand and gently rested his palm on her cheek, his eyelids drooping.

_Han, touching his cheek with a look of mingled shock, pain and forgiveness before falling away into the pit._

"There was only one way this would end," he breathed gruffly.

"It never needed to," she whispered. "You offered me your hand. Twice."

_When was the second time? She couldn't recall it at all…_

"You were filled with light and I was never able to overcome the darkness."

_Seeing him standing at her side, their sabers raised in synchronicity, facing a rotting corpse that was thick with evil, lightning flashing overhead._

"Leia always wanted you to come home," she said, a nagging wrongness tugging at her memory.

"But she's gone," he breathed, his lips white now. "But thank you."

_Snoke's eyes filled with shocked as the lightsaber carved him in two on his own throne._

_What had happened next?_

His hand slipped away. Kylo Ren's eyes fluttered closed and a final juddering breath left his body. And then he was still.

Pain stabbed through her chest, a sudden sense of loss far worse than when her parents abandoned her, when she held the dagger and realised what had happened to her parents, when she ran from Kef Bir…

_She had killed Leia's son. The son she had always hoped could come home. The son she…_

_Why couldn't she remember? Had returning from the darkness damaged her memory? Some things were clear and others…missing…_

_I wanted to take Ben's hand._

_She had…she had…_

"REY!" Rose's voice cut through her desperate struggle to fight through the memories, to catch the elusive mist of whatever had been there. She looked up, rage surging through her body. What she was doing was important. More than important. Something felt so very wrong and she had learned to listen to her feelings…

"Go away," she breathed.

"The First Order stormtroopers. They're coming!"

Rey found herself breathing hard, anger flowing through her veins. Something was wrong, making her feel unbalanced, skewed…as if she had been abandoned all over again. Rose appeared over the edge of the plateau as BB-8 gave an urgent warble and rolled forward.

"Get away from me!" Rey yelled, gesturing. The little droid flew through the air and hit Rose, leaving the woman breathless and the BB unit beeping frantically. But Rey was on her feet, striding forward and glaring down to see the trooper carriers hovering over the dozens of stormtroopers, advancing inexorably across the hostile ground. She could sense Poe and Finn hunkered down, facing hopeless odds.

_And Ben was dead._

_No…Kylo Ren was dead. Ben Solo died many years earlier._

_But Leia never gave up hope,_

She stretched out her senses, ignoring the fact that there seemed to be a gaping wound in the force by her, current tugging at her, and sensed the life within the transports. The rage was building within her, red misting her vision as she glared at them. All three were empty save their pilots, shadowing their troopers.

_…_ _a desert planet with a Silencer screaming in towards her. A leap, lightsaber in her hand. A precise blow, separating a wing from the main body and sending it spinning into oblivion. Seeing him walk from the wreckage towards her, unharmed…_

_Why was she relieved?_

_…_ _the ship, rising from the planet. A tug of war, her power singing as she hauled it closer. His power opposing hers…_

_…_ _lightning destroying the vessel…_

She flung her arm forward, palm towards the vessels and troopers, fingers splayed as she exerted all her strength. Rage was thrumming through her body, unreasonable anger at her resurrection, the loss of her friends by his manipulations, her fractured memory, the fact she had killed him when it felt so wrong, the fact that everything seemed out of kilter, the fact that there was a gnawing pain in her chest and heart and soul.

_Something immeasurably precious had been lost and she couldn't search for it with all these distractions!_

Lightning arched from her fingers, slamming into the nearest hovering transport and after a few second of resistance, blasting it apart. The lightning spread across the sky, arching to the other transports and blasting them apart, the burning wreckage dropping on the helpless and vulnerable stormtroopers below. Screams drifted up and she lowered her hand-but every eye was on her now. She could sense the anxiety, the fear emanating from her friends and from the white-armoured troopers who rapidly withdrew.

Shame washed over her again, leaving her empty. Her temper was all over the place, raging one moment and filled with remorse the next as she turned back to her friends. Rose was crouched down, eyes wide and scared of the woman facing her while BB-8 was beeping in a distinctly anxious manner. Rey's eyes filled with tears as she dropped her hands to her side and fell to her knees.

"I am so sorry," she whispered. "Rose, BB-8…are you okay…?" The shorter woman nodded slightly, eyes still huge with fear.

"What was that?" she asked sharply, ignoring the attack on herself.

"Force lightning," Rey whispered.

"Is that normal?"

"…no…" she whispered in a tiny, broken voice. BB-8 looked between the two women…and then slowly rolled forward, beeping warily. A sob wracked Rey's body. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed, tears streaking her face. "I am so sorry." The little droid nudged her, a stream of anxious beeps distracting her.

"I know," she whispered. "I don't know what happened…"

_"_ _What had to."_

Her head snapped up and the glowing translucent shape of Anakin appeared a few feet in front of her. Absently, Rey straightened out BB-8's antenna which had gotten bent as he landed on Rose.

"What do you mean?" Rose and Rey spoke simultaneously. Anakin sighed.

 _"_ _Answer her first and then send her to look for your friends. She can't see me and she may think you're crazy._ " Rey looked at him with teary eyes. _"Crazier,"_ he amended. Rey nodded.

"Force lightning is rare," Rey explained quietly. "It's the mark of a very strong Force User." She swallowed. "Mostly on the Dark Side," she added.

 _"_ _But not exclusively,"_ Anakin told her.

"But not exclusively," she added aloud. Rose nodded.

"You are a Jedi, aren't you?" she checked suspiciously. Rey nodded.

"Yes," she sighed. _Though I'm not sure what I am now. I mean, half my memory is faulty, I've been dead and I'm manifesting a Dark Side power…_ "Could you get the others. I need to speak to you all." Stealing a glance at the body of Kylo Ren, still resting against the ruins of the altar, Rose scrambled up and nodded, then set off. "She doesn't trust me."

" _She doesn't know you,_ " Anakin told her as Rey huffed in annoyance, wiping her face on the back of her hand.

"I thought what Ren did to them would wear off when he died," she said as the Jedi and former Sith Lord rose and walked to stand by his grandson, an unreadable look on his face.

" _He didn't do this,_ " he revealed. " _They did._ "

"What?"

 _"_ _You were dead and contrary to popular belief, Jedi don't have limitless powers,"_ Anakin said, his eyes never moving from the slumped shape. _"He never gave up. He chased across the Galaxy to find what was needed, risking his life. And when he found out what would be necessary, he knew it would cost him his life. Among other sacrifices._ " Rey rose and walked to his side, the droid rolling along beside her.

"Sorry-you're saying that Kylo Ren brought me back?" she asked, incredulously. "Why?"

Anakin finally looked up, his gaze pitying.

 _"_ _I could tell you that it was to atone. That when you died on Exegol, you weren't meant to. He was meant to give you his life force and die in penance for his crimes. You were supposed to live. But when he tried to bring you back on Exegol, he failed. So he was captured by the Resistance and eventually, he escaped, looking for you and a way to bring you back. He will explain why you have lost so much in the action._ " Rey frowned, rerunning his words.

"You said it was atonement but the way you said it… indicates something else," she told him. He nodded.

" _He loves you,_ " he said simply as she reeled in shock.

"That…monster?" she spat as he sighed.

" _Once. But since you were joined via your bond, he has been sliding into the Light_."

"Bond? With _Kylo Ren_? Surely, I would have remembered something like that!" she challenged him. He chuckled.

" _What do you know about him?_ " he asked her directly.

"He's Kylo Ren, the Jedi Killer. Apprentice of Snoke who killed him and took his place as Supreme Leader. He's ruthless and vicious. A monster who captured me and chased me and ransacked my mind. He was Ben Solo, son of Han Solo and General Leia Organa. He was Luke's apprentice and he tried to kill Luke and destroyed his temple, killing the other apprentices. He tried to destroy us. he killed his father. He killed Luke. He killed Leia…" She blinked and her voice softened. She felt unbalanced as she continued to speak.

"Leia died when she tried to reach out to him, to distract him to save my life. She was injured after being exposed to space when the bridge of the Raddus was blown out. He had the bridge in his sights but he couldn't pull the trigger. No matter what Snoke said, she was still his mother and that bond survived all the training, conditioning and punishments Snoke tried to turn him into a soulless monster. Snoke had pursued him throughout his life, always whispering in his mind, seducing him, isolating him. Feeding his anger and paranoia. Using him as his enforcer and assassin. But he was lonely and conflicted, riven by the guilt of killing his father. He told me what happened, that Luke stood over him with a lightsaber, planning to kill him. That he defended himself and collapsed the roof on them. That a lightning strike set the temple ablaze and that he did not kill the apprentices. That he had nowhere else to go. And I thought I could reach him, that I could turn him. He killed Snoke to save my life. We fought together against his guards and he asked me to rule with him. I refused and ran. We kept fighting and finally, on Kef Bir, I defeated him."

She backed away and stared at him, appalled.

"How do I know that?"

 _"_ _A Force Bond, a Dyad is unique and cannot be sundered, even by death,"_ Anakin told her _. "You know Ben as yourself. And no matter what he tried, the Bond was lost because he closed it. When he died, it opened once more and all those memories dammed back by the ritual were released."_

"But…" Her eyes drifted to Ben's slumped shape. "But I killed him…" Anakin gestured as BB-8 rolled forward, beeping urgently. This time, Rey crouched by him, offering her hand. After baulking for a second, he nudged against her again. "I am so sorry," she repeated as BB-8 looked at her, then glanced backwards as the other three appeared. And then he activated his holographic projector to show an image of Kylo Ren…except that the man facing her clearly wasn't the Supreme Leader. There was concern and urgency in his expression and a vulnerability that was missing from the monster. Ben ran his hands through his raven hair and looked into the camera.

"Rey," he said, his voice gentle. "If you are seeing this then I have succeeded…but also almost certainly lost. I will have brought you back to life…but that brings huge risks. The Sith Holocron I used to bring you back demanded that your friends gave up their memories of your friendship-so they won't recall you. It has to be voluntary so they will have willingly surrendered their friendship to give you a chance of life. You surrendered the memories of our Bond and I…had to surrender the Light." He gave a small smile that still lit his face. "And this is why I am recording this. Because I have once again become the monster you feared, and that was what met you when you rose again. And I know…I know how I will have behaved because I was that person, not so long ago. But I also know that now, you are more than strong enough to defeat me. Without the light, I am incomplete and I know in my heart…that my _life_ was really what was required to bring you back. And it's a price I pay gladly."

Rey found her eyes prickling with tears.

"Rey…I have done terrible, unforgivable things. I know no penance can repay the harm I have done. But I knew that I had to bring you back-and your friends have supported me on this quest. Finn and Poe stood by me on our journey-even though Poe can't forgive how I treated him. And I understand that, having suffered a First Order interrogation myself and felt the violation when you inadvertently looked inside my mind. Poe…I am sorry, though I know words can never put right the hurt you suffered. Finn was brave and loyal…not the traitor I thought him because it took courage to leave such an evil organisation as the First Order. Rose…has been like a sister. Though she had so many reasons to hate me, she helped me when I was at my lowest." He took a deep breath. "I am sorry, Rey. I am not sorry I gave you another chance at life, because you deserve it. But I am sorry that doing so robbed you of your friends, of the past you shared that they no longer recall. And I am so sorry that I have left you. Severing the Bond was the last thing I wanted-and I never wanted to leave you alone because I, of everyone, knows how lonely you are. But you have people who know you, who can support you. Who will come to love you again as much as they did before."

He smiled once more into the camera.

"May the Force be with you-always."

As the image vanished, she heard steps as her friend closed to a few paces away. But Rey could only stare at the body of the man who had given his life for her and sob.


	27. Twenty Seven

**Twenty Seven.**

He became aware that he was nowhere. All was cold and grey.

He was dead.

The realisation was accompanied by very human need to feel at the site where he had been impaled, fingers urgently exploring flesh that seemed whole but of course, didn't actually exist. He stared carefully, still feeling the agonising pain as the laser blade drove through his flesh…and then he forced it away. Would he feel that forever or would it fade as he faded?

There were echoes, distorted sounds of voices, rippling around him. It was like listening through water, everything magnified and muffled, all at the same time.

And then he heard her.

She was alive. It had worked, Thank the Maker, it had worked.

And he was dead. He had done everything he could to atone now…but it was fair. Every other member of his family as gone and he had finally fulfilled the Skywalker legacy. He had given his life for something he truly believed in. For someone he loved-just as his mother had given her life to reach him and draw him back to the Light.

But there was still something holding him there, an invisible thread that still bound him to Rey.

 _The Dyad Bond_. It still existed. He could still hear and feel Rey.

Was this truly his punishment, to watch the woman he loved for the rest of his life, always longing, sharing her triumphs and disasters, maybe seeing her love another, live a full life, raise a family…without him?

Surely this was some form of Hell?

But he had made his choices-some freely made, some scavenged as the only option he had left when all else had been taken from him-and he had been offered chances to escape. Rey had wanted to save him…and maybe, had he taken her hand in the Throne Room, they would both be alive, they would both have survived. And maybe Luke and his Mom as well. All those deaths maybe could have been averted, both those of people who meant so much to him and the nameless legions who had died in the conflict.

It was all his fault.

_If only he had taken her hand._

His heart ached. For the pain he had caused her so many times…and now, by taking her memories, her friends, her love and the Bond.

The Bond that still existed…

Focussing every ounce of his concentration, he snagged the tenuous connection and pulled…

-o0o-

No one said a word, all shocked by what they had seen. Kylo Ren's words had silenced and BB-8 had closed down his projector, staying beside Rey as she sobbed. The young Jedi stiffened as she felt arms wrap around her shoulders and the warm presence of Rose, who was hugging her. Unable to say anything, she just curled into the smaller woman and cried until her tears were exhausted. BB-8 shot off a stream of comforting beeps as she slowly looked up.

"Thanks," she sighed as Poe walked forward. His comm beeped and he automatically raised it to his lips.

"Dameron," he said shortly.

"General-are you safe?" Beau asked and Poe checked around his group. Finn was looking hugely conflicted and Poe didn't know what to think. Something about Ren's words had seemed…right, tugging at that irritating deja vu feeling that Poe had been fighting.

"Safe may not be the correct term," he admitted. "Finn, Rose and Rey are unharmed, if that's what you're asking."

"Rey?" Zorii's voice broke over the com. "He did it then?" There was an awkward pause.

"If by him, you mean Ren, then yeah," Poe said, his tone subdued.

"Flyboy-what aren't you telling us?" Zorrii demanded.

"There's been a complication," Poe suggested.

"General-can this wait?" Beau said, breaking in. "There are some very serious things happening. First-did three stormtrooper transports explode? And second-the fleet has arrived and is engaging." Rey frowned.

"What?" she murmured. But Poe gave a slightly more confident smile.

"Our Jedi took them out," he reported.

"She can do that?" Beau asked. Poe chuckled.

"For sure," he confirmed.

"Wait-what did you say about the fleet?" Rose asked, scowling. Poe sighed.

"There are two First Order Star Destroyers in orbit above us," he reminded them. "But since Exegol, we've had a stampede of worlds and former Republic politicians swarming to join us in forming the New Republic. And they have offered us vessels to mop up any remaining First Order ships. This seemed like a good opportunity to test out their resolve. So how many have turned up?"

"Eighteen heavy cruisers including three that escaped the Hosnian massacre," Beau reported and Poe frowned as Finn walked to his side and leaned close.

"Where were they the we needed them?" Finn murmured as Rey rose slowly to her feet. She was peering at the shape of Kylo Ren.

"While he lived, he was a powerful deterrent," she murmured. "They wouldn't step forward when the First Order was in the ascendent and Kylo Ren ruled. But with him gone, much of their force destroyed and the remains scattered…maybe they feel they- _we_ -stand a chance." Rose suddenly crouched down by the orange and white droid, glancing at her hand.

"BB-8…can you broadcast what you recorded?" she asked urgently. "Up to the point when Ren died?" The little droid beeped in agreement and edited the recording, then sent the whole thing to the Resistance vessels and the nearby comms relays. Rey frowned.

"What…?" she asked.

"I asked him to record what happened," Rose said, struggling to recall why. Then she turned over her hand to see a few words scrawled there. "I must have thought it important enough to leave myself a 'To Do' list."

"Anything else on that list?" he murmured as Rose sighed.

"Remember that Rey is your friend. Trust her. And do what she asks," she read.

"Can you bring the Falcon to our location?" Poe asked, his eyes focussed on the sky. There were flashes of lasers and explosions overhead as the two forces engaged. "I need to get up there…"

"And do what?" Finn asked, frowning. "You don't have your X-wing and we're all on the Falcon. One hit and…"

"I asked D'Acy to arrange one of the cruisers to have a fighter ready for me," Poe explained, a confident smile on his lips. BB-8 gave a worried beep and then rolled forward. "It's okay, buddy. I can't do anything down here and there are still a few stormtroopers who will be really pissed at us…" But Rey was standing with her eyes closed, her fists pressed against her temples.

"Will you all SHUT UP!" she screamed. Everyone spun at look at her as finally, with the wind blowing and the lightning flashing in the skies, she was able to crouch before the body. Quietly, she took his hand, feeling his skin cold as it had never been in life. He was always warm, vital…even when she touched him on Kef Bir, when the waves lashed and sprayed them with freezing water, his skin was warm as she used her life force to heal the wound and give him his life…

"Be with me," she mouthed. "Help me. I need advice so badly."

" _You only have to ask,"_ a voice said. Luke appeared, his face grave. Beside him, Anakin, Obi-Wan and Yoda all materialised. Rey looked up.

"It cannot end like this," she said,

" _What is, is,"_ Yoda said, his eyes narrowing. _"Restored has continuity been."_

"No," she said. "I can't be left here without him. I can feel him…" Her eyes widened and she closed her eyes. "I can feel him still, in the distance. He's in pain…confused…in despair…"

 _"_ _Dead is young Solo,"_ Yoda stated.

"Then why can I still feel him?" she cried, angry tears sliding down her cheeks. "Why do I have to share his pain? Why did I forget he loved me? That he came for me? That he fought and suffered and almost died to help me defeat Palpatine? That he was left so alone when he was alone for most of his life, seduced by Snoke and abandoned by everyone who should have loved him and protected him!" She saw Luke look uncomfortable and a brief flash of triumph shot through her.

" _Kid-these things are difficult,_ " Anakin sighed.

" _Force Bonds are incredibly unpredictable,_ " Obi-Wan pronounced. " _A Dyad Bond even more so. By rights, you should have felt it severed with his death. Death is the only thing that can end a bond."_

 _"_ _Unless together they are meant to be,"_ Yoda put in. The ancient Jedi hobbled slowly forward, using his stick heavily. Rey wondered why he hadn't chosen a more able shape for his Force Avatar. " _The Force does not choose. The Force has no will. But other forces do."_

 _"_ _Maybe there can be no balance unless they are together,_ " Obi-Wan murmured. Anakin rolled his eyes.

 _"_ _Look, I was tagged as the Chosen One all my life,"_ he pointed out. _"It's really not fair to land that burden on anyone."_

 _"_ _Maybe it's not anyone,"_ Luke suggested, his eyes thoughtful. _"Maybe Balance requires them both. Both powerful, one corrupted to Darkness, the other stubbornly wedded to the Light but both a mix of both. Truly a balance."_ Yoda looked down on Ben's slack features.

 _"_ _A good point, you make,"_ he said then looked up. " _But he is almost beyond reach."_

"He can be brought back?" There was sudden hope in Rey's voice and her teary eyes brightened.

 _"_ _Difficult will it be,_ " Yoda decreed. _"Holocron and Altar are gone. Cannot use same method. Only option is to heal and draw him back through Force."_

"Why didn't he do that?" she asked, frowning. There was an awkward sharing of looks.

" _He was too weak, too badly injured to save you on Exegol-though he tried,"_ Anakin told her.

" _And he couldn't hear us,_ " Luke said. Then he had the grace to look self-conscious. " _Not that he would want to hear me anyway. But he would have benefited from a word of advice and comfort-but he was not able to hear us because of his past. Because of the evil he did."_

"But I used Force Lightning though I can hear you," Rey asked, her anxiety swirling in her chest. "I saw the Emperor and Snoke use it. Does that mean that I am evil?"

 _"_ _All it means, Rey, is that you are a very powerful Force User,"_ Obi-Wan reassured her. " _Because you use the Dark Side, you can access more power. But you are still in the Light. But you need Ben Solo to help you, to balance you. Your souls are connected-that is why neither of you could cross until the other also died."_

"Then there is hope?" she sighed and then she sagged. "He is dead. It will take all my life to bring him back, won't it?"

 _"_ _Maybe…if you were alone,"_ Anakin said. _"But I will help. I will lend you my energy."_

 _"_ _And I,"_ Luke said immediately. _"He's not the only one who has things to atone for."_

 _"_ _None of us were without failure or weakness,"_ Obi-Wan added. _"May I suggest we call one other?"_ He closed his eyes and a fifth shape shimmered into being, Rey gasped-for it was Leia. The woman's eyes softened with sorrow as she gazed down on the body of her son.

_"_ _Ben."_

"I'm sorry," Rey said thickly. "I know you wanted him saved…but I didn't know him when he brought me back. He had gone back to the Dark. And I…I…" Leia wrapped her in a hug that was surprisingly warm and real despite the woman being a ghost.

 _"_ _I saw,"_ she reassured Rey. " _And I want to help you bring him back."_

"Rey-what's happening?" Rose asked, her eyes suspicious. "I can't see anyone there." The young Jedi almost laughed at her confusion.

"Part of the fun…or not...of being a Jedi is that you can sometimes communicate with the spirits of Jedis from the past," she explained. Rose looked around wildly.

"You mean ghosts?" she asked.

"Yes, ghosts," Rey explained patiently, not looking at Anakin, who was grinning or Leia and Luke who were whispering between themselves. "Force Ghosts. And they may be able to help me bring Ben back."

"Whoa whoa whoa…no one said anything about resurrecting the man who led the First Order and killed hundreds personally and thousands…maybe millions…by his orders…" Poe said immediately, raising his hands as if to ward off the very idea. "And let's not forgive him for torturing me…"

"He apologised," Finn murmured. "He did everything he said. He got us off the First Order ship when he could have run on his own…"

"He asked me about Paige," Rose murmured. "I believe him. He did terrible things…but he did everything he could to bring you back to life…and I think…he knew and accepted that it would cost his life." She sighed. "I remember…he was sad. He was sorry. He was broken and alone. And I knew…it was genuine…"

"It was," Rey murmured. "I…feel him…"

 _"_ _We are all with you,"_ Anakin told her. Rey nodded, looking at her human friends.

"Do I need to remind you that there is a damned space battle going on overhead?" Poe asked them, irritably gesturing towards the skies. The flashes of laser fire were intensifying as individual as well as larger battles raged. "I need to get up there…"

"Actually-you don't," Finn told him, his face stern. "You are the General…and though you are the best pilot in the Resistance, your own skills are not necessarily needed, just weight of numbers-and maybe some co-ordination, which you can oversee from _the Falcon_!" For a second, resentment and anger warred on Poe's handsome face-and then he shrugged.

"And that is why you're my co-General," he said with a resigned smile.

 _"_ _I couldn't have said it better myself,"_ Leia murmured in Rey's ear. _"I made the right choice. I just think he needs to keep believing in himself."_

"I'll tell him," Rey murmured. "I need help. I just need a tiny fraction of your life energy-as I used to heal that creature on Pasaana. Alone, I won't survive-but I have to do this." Then she started as she felt Luke's hand on her shoulder. Anakin knelt by his grandson's side with Obi-Wan and Yoda by his side. Slowly but determinedly, Rose took station at his other side, resting her hand on his shoulder. Finn walked forward and crouched by Rose with Poe rolling his eyes and following his fellow General.

"Do we do something?" he asked. "Murmur an incantation? Pray? Whistle?" Rey closed her eyes and rested her hand on the ugly defect in Ben's chest.

"Be with me," she said and concentrated.

She could feel the Force flowing around them, the brilliant shapes of the Force Ghosts, the warm thrumming of her friends and the eddies and flows of the other life-such as it was-on Dathomir. Above, she could sense the concentrations of life on the ships, lives snuffing out as shots were traded and TIE and X-wings exploded into clouds of debris and vapour.

But before her was a vacuum, a black hole in the Force where his brilliant life force should be…but trailing through it was a single golden thread, the last residuum of the precious, unique Dyad Bond. She felt energised, almost glowing with the power of the Force, not only from the Ghosts but from her living friends and she concentrated on knitting the tissues back together, repairing the awful damage she had wrought. Slowly, flesh moved, blood vessels and organs were reconnected and muscles and skin once again were whole.

And she could feel him, feel the faintest flicker of light at the end of the Bond and her heart swelled with pity. Denied the peace of death, denied the honour and acceptance of becoming a Force ghost for his misdeeds, he was trapped in limbo…alone.

Her soul mate. Her other half.

 _I am here,_ she thought and pulled, feeling him reach out to her.

_Rey…_

His voice was faint, almost devoid of hope but she channeled power through, surging life force into his repaired body.

"Come back, Ben. Be with me. _Live_."

She was almost glowing, her eyes blazing with light as she surged power, never taking more than a small portion from each person. And she found herself smiling, feeling Rose's essential goodness, Finn's steadfastness, Poe's strength of mind all flowing through her-as well as echoes of Luke and Leia, who she had known so well. Finally, exhausted, she felt him coming closer and closer, the light growing brighter and brighter until she could almost feel his warmth…

…and then she could feel nothing at all.

Her vision blanked and she collapsed backwards, breathing hard and gasping for air. Her friends were all sitting back, looking totally drained. And the Force Ghosts had gone.

"Thank you," she whispered, forcing herself to crawl forward, resting a hand on his chest, the wound gone and perfectly repaired flesh visible through the rent in his tunic. And her eyes flickered open wider, feeling the strong, steady beat of his heart under her hand. She leaned forward, tenderly brushing a lock of raven hair off his forehead and looking into his face.

"Ben?" she asked, sending her concern and hope down the bond. "Ben? Be with me. Don't leave me alone any more."

He took a jagged breath in and his eyelids flickered before his eyes slowly opened and he looked up at her with wonder.

"Rey."


	28. Twenty Eight

**Twenty Eight.**

"Rey."

The word was weak, barely a breath, but it was there. She gave something halfway between a laugh and a sob.

"Ben," she whispered. "You're alive." He shakily raised a hand to lightly touch her cheek with the tips of his fingers, the gentle touch a very human, a very tender gesture.

"I hope so," he managed. "Be very disappointed…if this was just a dream…" She smiled then and he reciprocated, his features lighting with the grin.

"It's really you," she whispered. "Not Kylo- _Ben_."

"I think both of them…are versions of me…but I'm back in the Light…" he sighed, grimacing. He shifted his position slightly. "This really isn't the most comfortable bed," he added. Rey nodded.

"Are you okay otherwise?" she asked and the smile dropped a little.

"Had a busy time since you…went," he admitted. "But I'm alive-we're _both_ alive-and anything else can heal…" Rey stared into his eyes-then lunged forward, pressing her lips to his and he immediately responded, kissing back, his hand gently cupping the back of her neck. She was everything he had ever imagined, that unique mix of sweetness and ferocity that was Rey. She was inexperienced and he hadn't had much more practice but there was an urgency in her kiss that filled his senses, supplemented by the desire he felt surge down the Bond, tempered with her relief that he was back with her once more. And he never wanted to let her go…until he felt her pull away and then he gently released her. He was grinning then, his entire face lit once more with a broad grin that transformed his stern features.

"I've been wanting to do that since…forever," she said, a blush warming her cheeks.

"Ahch-To," he absently murmured and then met her eyes. "Because I've been wanting to do that for at least as long." He swallowed and looked into her eyes, shields down and free from all artifice. "Because I love you."

"Touching though this is, does anyone remember there is a war going on above us?" Poe asked in an impatient voice. Both Rose and Finn hit his arms simultaneously. "Hey-but there are still stormtroopers out there and I need to know if we're kicking their butts or not…" He was interrupted as the familiar sounds of the _Millennium Falcon's_ engines drowned them out and the freighter spun and landed rather awkwardly on the uneven ground of the plateau, the backwash almost knocking them over. Poe was on his feet instantly with Finn at his side, both heading straight to the ship. Giving a stream of relieved beeps, BB-8 rolled along after them before Rey and Rose managed to manhandle Ben to his feet. He grimaced and nearly fell, his legs buckling and needing Rey and Rose to support him as he stumbled up the ship. Jannah was waiting, her eyes wide as she stared at Rey.

"I really didn't think it was possible…" she murmured as the Jedi paused and turned, gesturing. The two lightsabers and her staff flew into her hands before she resumed half-dragging the listing Ben onto the freighter. He leaned against the wall as the ramp closed and Jannah turned back to the main passageway. Up in the cockpit, he could hear Zorii and Poe arguing over who should fly the Falcon. Rey's face hardened and she glared.

"Go," Ben said. "I'll be alright. And this is your ship, after all." Suddenly shy, she looked up into his eyes.

"Actually, I think it should be yours," she said but he gently lifted her chin with one finger.

"Rey," he sighed. "I think I gave up my claim on this ship when I murdered my father. He would want you to have it because I think…in the short time he knew you…he saw in you the daughter he never had. And maybe the child he wanted." There was a tinge of pain to his tone but he was nothing but sincere. "So he would want you or Chewie to have her. And I think you can stop those idiots arguing and get us out of here. I'll be fine." She gave a small nod and ran as he finally sagged. Rose frowned.

"You're not completely healed, are you?" she asked, seeing the answer in his face.

"Nowhere near," he admitted. "I'm alive which is a shock…and I'm free of the Darkness again. I just need to concentrate of making sure she doesn't know for the moment." The woman nodded and inserted herself under his arm.

"Let's get you strapped in," she said firmly. "I think it's going to get bumpy."

They had barely made the crew quarters when the whole ship juddered and an irate Zorii came stalking in.

"Of all the arrogant self-important smug smarmy stick-jockeys…" she spat as she saw the listing shape of Ben. "She asked him to fly! And I thought she was alright!" Rose stared at her.

"Poe has flown the Falcon before in combat," she tried to explain.

"I would have known you would side with her," she snapped.

"You're a good pilot and a good shot," Rose soothed her. "And if we're heading up, we're going to need gunners." Zorii paused.

"What's up with Commander Disaster?" she asked and then frowned. "You know there was a broadcast that showed you being killed? It flashed up before we took off." Rose gave a small smile.

"I'll explain later," she said as the ship jolted. Nodding, the other woman vanished towards the guns as Finn charged down to join her. Ben inspected Rose carefully as she pushed him onto the seat by the table and strapped him in.

"So news of my death may have been exaggerated?" he commented dryly.

"Not at all," Rose told him. "I asked BB-8 to record what happened. And when you died, I had written myself a note to broadcast it. It happened. It's just…no one knows you were brought back." The ship jolted.

"But unless we're lucky, I might be gone again," he added sarcastically. "What the Kriff is happening?" Jannah stumbled in, her eyes concerned, followed swiftly by Beau.

"The First Order."

-o0o-

General Hux was seething. His plans had been perfectly laid, his trap planned to perfection-and suddenly the entire situation was spiralling out of control. He had reached out on top secret frequencies for any remaining First Order ships and to his shock, _the Finalizer_ had responded, arriving at the specified co-ordinates promptly. Hux had never liked Captain Peavey, strongly believing the man was laughing at him behind his back, but he was at least competent. And he had acquiesced when Hux demanded his cooperation in the mission and had provided stormtroopers for the planetary assault. There had been very limited life-form readings from the planet-but tracking _the Millennium Falcon_ had been simple-and that was what Hux wanted.

 _Ren_ was what Hux wanted. He wanted him on his knees, begging for mercy. Beaten and bloodied, cowed and powerless, his entire life hanging on Hux's mercy. And oh, Hux was determined to grant him none. In his dreams, sadistic and vengeful as they were, he had already imagined every possible torment for the man who had thwarted and abused him over and over. For every Force-choke and snide comment, Hux would repay him ten-…no, a _hundred_ -fold.

But something had happened. The troop transports had been taken out, killing a number of troopers and sending the remainder into retreat. He had ordered them to advance again but in the meantime, _the Millennium Falcon_ had gotten off the ground. And worse, a collection of ships had appeared and attacked the two Resurgent Class Destroyers. There were eighteen heavy cruisers, heavily armoured, that were inflicting significant damage as well as a flock of smaller Resistance fighters. Hux had ordered the TIEs to engage and brought the cannons on line.

It was chaos, one of the reasons Hux hated traditional battles. Sure, _the Eliminator_ was heavily armed with new and more powerful weapons than a normal star destroyer but there were a lot of Rebel ships and they were coordinated and determined to inflict a defeat. Peripherally, Hux paid attention to the reports of the battle, snapping orders to correct sloppiness in the line and urging his men on. After all, battle was in his blood, the son of a General and the rightful Supreme Leader.

But somehow, the rebels were faster and more nimble, attacking the Destroyers and sliding in between their shields to inflict strafing runs. It was humiliating that such ragtag ships could be in danger of defeating the most efficient, most brilliantly constructed force the Galaxy had ever seen! It was time to bring out the big guns.

"Prepare the Ventral Phase Cannon!" he ordered. "Let's see if these Resistance scum can withstand our newest technology." Pride swirled through him and he watched as his gunnery crews line up and bring the full force onto the nearest cruiser. It was technology similar to that of the old Death Star and the Planetkiller Guns that Pryde and his lackeys had deployed across the fleet-but Hux had developed it all himself and he was certain it was superior and possessed none of the fatal weaknesses that had plagued the original and Starkiller Base. So it was with the pride of a father looking on a child's achievements that he smiled as the roiling energy punched straight through the shields and blasted the largest vessel to atoms.

"Line up on the next ship!" he ordered.

"Sir-may I remind you that using the weapon drains our batteries and will lower the shields?" Captain Rinder asked respectfully. Hux breathed in sharply and nodded once.

"It doesn't matter," he spat. "Another couple of shots and they will break and run. Once they realise that they can't defeat us, they will skulk away like the cowards they are!" He nodded. "Recharge the cannon."

-o0o-

"WHAT THE KRIFF?" Poe's shout sounded though the Falcon as the whole ship jolted to one side. In a moment, Ben was up, staggering as the ship jerked sideways again. He impacted against the wall and gritted his teeth not to make a sound. He still had wounds that were only partly healed and the impact hadn't helped. But he managed to make it to the cockpit and hung onto the doorway.

"Tell me what's happening," he said. Rey glanced up and frowned.

"One of the Star Destroyers has some sort of super weapon that just blasted one of the Resistance Cruisers to pieces-despite its shields!" she reported.

"The _Inglarit,_ " Poe muttered. "Why is it that they always seem to have some super gun? Do they have a super warehouse somewhere? Is there some super weapon catalogue that no one talks about?" Ben slid into the vacant seat.

"Maybe Hux feels inadequate,' he muttered as everyone briefly turned to stare at him in shock.

"Did-did you just…?" Rey asked, looking at him in shock. Ben shrugged.

"I really don't like him," he said simply and frowned. "It's based on Death Star tech. That's Hux's personal Star Destroyer, _the Eliminator_. The one he imagined Snoke and I didn't know about." Poe banked them round so the gunners could take out a couple more TIEs as he framed his next question.

"You mean you _do_ know about it?" he checked. Ben nodded and closed his eyes, wracking his brain for intelligence. Snoke had discussed it with him, cruelly mocking the General to his lapdog and apprentice.

_"_ _You wonder why I keep a rabid dog like him around?" Snoke said in his smooth, sneering voice. Kylo hadn't answered, knowing anything he said would be wrong. Snoke wanted to demonstrate to one of his pets that nothing escaped his notice, that there was no chance of either of them getting any transgression past him. "Because even a rabid cur can have a use." Kylo had looked up then, unable to hide his disdain._

_"_ _And that use?" he breathed without thinking. Snoke chuckled._

_"_ _Be careful your rivalry doesn't blind you to who the Master is," he intoned, the edge to his voice chilling. Kylo bowed his head submissively. Hux was not worth enduring any further punishment for._

_"_ _No, Master," he said tonelessly._

_"_ _Hux forgets I am older and more powerful than he could imagine," Snoke pressed on. "I know of his covert operations. He is diverting materiel and manpower to another Destroyer that he thinks he has concealed from me. It really is amusing that he thinks he can get away with this."_

_"_ _You suspect his ambition?" Kylo said the last word as if it was foul-tasting. "Treason?"_

_"_ _It is amusing to see him try so hard," Snoke sneered. "I will allow him rein for now. He seems to be loading his secret ship with every possible technology. Perhaps his dedication will lead him to more innovations." Kylo frowned._

_"_ _You don't intend to leave him unmuzzled?" he asked sharply, his eyes betraying his anger and a hint of jealousy. It had been a mistake and his head snapped up, the Force tightening cruelly around his throat. His body was frozen and he struggled fiercely to try to ease the vicious pressure._

_"_ _Do not assume I will tolerate insubordination!" Snoke growled, lifting him from the ground. His vision blurred._

_"_ _No…Master…" he managed to rasp. Snoke brutally surged Force lightning through him, the energy scourging him viciously. Unable to resist, all he could do was scream until Snoke relented, leaving his shattered mind on the brink of unconsciousness. After another long and sadistic moment, Snoke dropped him in a graceless heap._

_"_ _Pryde has infiltrated men into the engineering crews that have inserted override codes into his vessel," Snoke said. "He is unaware-the men were examined when they returned and then executed to maintain secrecy. If Hux thinks ever to use his ship against me, I can turn it off at the simple broadcast of a code. The code also locks him out and erases all but my personal codes from the system." Still heaving for breath, Kylo glanced up and inspected his master, privately resolving to ensure he knew the override code. And ensuring Hux would never find out…_

"There's a code that will kill Hux's ship," he said slowly. Poe frowned.

"What?"

"Snoke knew about the ship and had a kill code inserted without Hux's knowledge," he said. "Broadcast it and the ship will be no better than space junk."

"And you know it?" Poe's mouth twitched up in a small smile.

"I know it," Ben said, dragging the memory up. He had dug up the code from Snoke's archives on _the Supremacy_ as soon as he had dismissed Hux from the wrecked Throne Room, knowing from the man's thoughts that he had stood over his helpless, unconscious shape with an armed blaster. That if he had woken a moment later, he wouldn't have lived. So he felt no qualms or guilt in erasing what evidence he could find of his treason and all evidence of the existence of the code after committing it to memory. It existed only in his memory and buried deep in the system of Hux's private Star Destroyer.

Giving a small smile and feeling a distinctly un-Lightside surge of triumph, Ben reached forward, tapped it in and sent the code.

-o0o-

"Cannon charged!"

"Check range!"

"Ready to fire, sir,"

Hux allowed a small smile to tilt his lips.

"Target the largest Resistance vessel-then fire at will!" he commanded superciliously. He smirked. "We'll vaporise the _Millennium Falcon_ next. I can survive not watching Ren tortured and broken over years if I know I've lasted him to atoms." He turned back to the viewing screen and smirked.

"On my mark…F-"

And then the entire bridge went dark.

The ship juddered and the impact of the strafing X- and Y-wings shuddered through the deck.

"What's happening?" Hux demanded, turning to his crew. They were helplessly working at screens that were uniformly dark. There was no sign of a single light anywhere. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"

"Sir-the entire system has crashed," Rinder reported, looking up from the weapons system. "Every system has wiped. There is no response-and no way in to reboot. I can dispatch teams to the main computer node but they will have to be staff from here because all coms are dead."

"Is anything working?" Hux asked furiously. Rinder looked around.

"No," he said. "Which includes environmental systems, air recycling, probably reactor containment…" There was a pause.

"Send the team and make it fast," the General snapped. "Troopers-guard the main door to the bridge." Then he turned and clambered down to the lower level. "Break out the emergency personal coms and send a distress call to _the Finalizer._ " Rinder stared at him.

"What are you doing, sir?" he asked. Hux gave him a glare.

"Transferring to _the Finalizer,_ " he said bluntly. "I will assume command there so that we can still win the battle." He gestured to a single stormtrooper. "Come with me to the emergency shuttle. The rest of you-stand by your posts and do your duty!" And with that, he vanished through the hatch to the small escape shuttle.

-o0o-

" _The Eliminator_ is completely dead," Rey reported. "She's drifting and taking heavy damage. In fact, she's drifting towards t _he Finalizer_."

"Falcon-this is _the Reunity,_ " a voice announced.

"Good to hear you. D'Acy," Poe replied. "All ships to concentrate fire on the one remaining functional vessel…"

"General-I would strongly recommend withdrawing," D'Acy said urgently. "There are indications of reactor containment loss in all areas of the crippled ship."

"Did you know this would happen?" Poe demanded and Ben shrugged.

"No," he said honestly. "Remember, I've never seen any schematics or reports on this vessel since it doesn't technically exist and Snoke never shared what he had actually done to Hux's systems. Not that I could ask…"

"All ships turn and attack _the Finalizer_ but stay away from the other ship!" Poe ordered and swung _the Falcon_ round to join in the assault. Chewie suddenly howled and Ben frowned.

"It's what?" he asked.

"This I gotta see," Poe said as they spun round to see _the Finalizer_ swinging its guns round to bear on the stricken _Eliminator_. There were a handful of escape pods beginning to burst from the listing ship-and as they watched, there was a small explosion in the starboard engine. Immediately, _the Finalizer_ poured the fire from every gun on the stricken shieldless ship and as they watched, it exploded. Poe flung _the Millennium Falcon_ round to avoid the shock wave, diving behind _the Finalizer_ along with the Resistance ships-but many of the TIE fighters were caught in the open and buffeted mercilessly.

"Maker," Ben murmured and winced, feeling the surge of deaths in the Force. Rey was cringing as well and instinctively, he found her hand, flooding reassurance down the Bond. She nodded and glanced up at him, a small smile on her lips.

"You know, I have a thing about people taking my hand without permission," she murmured but as he made to let go, her hand tightened around his. "In your case, I'm making an exception."

He chuckled.

"Very grateful," he said, giving her hand a little squeeze. Then there was a burst of static over the comm and a familiar voice spoke up.

 _"_ _This is Captain Edrison Peavey of the First Order ship Finalizer. I wish to negotiate terms for our surrender._ "


	29. Twenty Nine

**Twenty Nine.**

Ben was staring at the wild lights of hyperspace through the cockpit windows, seated comfortably in the pilot's seat. He was exhausted, his body hurt and he had no clue what was going to happen to him now-but he couldn't sleep. Because he needed to savour every moment that Rey was finally here and alive-even if she was fast asleep.

He sighed and stretched. His wounds from Mustafar hadn't been helped by his death experience and he had finally allowed an extremely grumpy and rough Tamini to patch him up with Rey offering to Force-heal him…but he was determined that she wouldn't waste any of her newly regained life force on him. In fact, the worry that she would try to covertly help him while he was asleep was another reason he just couldn't unwind enough to rest.

He had done it. Finally, Rey was saved and Hux was defeated. His ship was wreckage and the Rebels had allowed _the Finalizer_ -along with the Rebel vessels-to rescue any survivors from the remains of _the Eliminator_. Peavey had negotiated for the safety of his crew and once he was satisfied, he had surrendered. The ship's navigational system was slaved to _the Reunity_ and a skeleton Rebel crew transferred over to monitor the trip to Coruscant where the majority of the new Resistance Allies were meeting. Poe and Finn had reluctantly agreed to go as well but they were flying via Kineva to finally drop off Tamini before they headed to join the Resistance party.

Hux had been located. A large portion of Ben was disappointed because the man not only wanted him dead but he could positively identify him as Kylo Ren, a man who was supposed to have died. Fished from a damaged emergency bridge shuttle with a semi-conscious stormtrooper, Hux had been furious, arrogant and ultimately stubborn but when he had declared himself as Supreme Leader, the Resistance had laughed in his face-before shackling him securely and throwing him in the brig for war crimes and genocide. Ben had made sure they knew that he was the one who had developed and ordered the firing of Starkiller Base, killing fourteen billion sentients.

Idly, Ben flipped through the news net, scanning what was happening and he smiled as he caught the headlines.

_"_ _In Galaxy Eye tonight, our headlines are… Former Supreme Leader of the First Order Kylo Ren is dead. Verified footage by Resistance leaders Finn and Poe Dameron shows him dying in direct combat with Last Jedi, Rey of Jakku, on the planet Dathomir. His remains have already been cremated and scattered in space to prevent any resting place forming a shrine for former First Order supporters._

_In a twist of fate, two hold-out First Order Destroyers were engaged by Joint Resistance-Council forces over Dathomir. One was destroyed and the other surrendered and will be returned to Coruscant for examination and demobilisation. General Armitage Hux of the First Order, the Butcher of Hosnia, was captured and will face charges of genocide._

_The newly formed Interim Council has issued a statement:_

_'_ _Today is a great day for Freedom. Both the leaders of the First Order are now removed. General Hux's trial will be scheduled as soon as he arrives on Coruscant. We regret that Kylo Ren has escaped justice but we accept that the Galaxy is a safer place now that he breathes no more.'_

_In other news…"_

"So it's official," Poe murmured, walking into the cockpit and handing Ben a cup of caff. "You are dead. How does it feel?"

"Surprisingly achy and tiring," he replied dryly. "Thanks." He sipped the caff and returned his gaze to the chaotic streaks of stars. Poe sat and inspected him for a moment.

"I still don't like you," he said without preamble.

"I know." Ben felt himself tense slightly, not moving from his inspection of the stars.

"I still get nightmares about what you and your men did."

"I know."

" _How?_ " Poe's voice was sharp. Then Ben turned and looked over at him, his eyes defeated.

"Because worse happened to me- _much_ worse-on a regular basis," he said without expression. Poe's eyes widened.

"What?" His tone was a mixture of incredulity and pity, a combination that caused Ben to feel a surge of anger that was somehow comforting: an old friend, just like pain.

"I'm not seeking pity," he said, his tone flat. "Snoke trained his Knights-and me, their leader-like animals. Pain and reward, pain and reward. And he was a very cruel and intolerant master so there was _much_ more pain, such when he granted you a word of praise, you were pathetically grateful not to be hurt. And I get nightmares as well. Because I have too much pain in my past not to get them. Both what happened to me and what I did."

"I'd have thought you could rationalise what you did as for the greater good," Poe snarked. Ben gave a humourless laugh.

"I did," he said forcefully. "Snoke had done his work well, making me believe in him with all my heart-I thought. Embracing his vision like an apprentice, a fanatic. Yet there were always doubts, whispers, things that called me back to the Light. To my family. But when I killed Dad, the action that should have eliminated all my doubts, it just tore me apart. Being Bonded to Rey worsened my conflict and in the end, I chose her over Snoke. I killed him to save her-and then I offered her my hand, to rule at my side."

"Yeah-that went well," Poe scoffed, sipping the cooling caff. Ben sighed.

"Every moment has its significance, a range of possibilities that may diverge from each action," he murmured. "The time wasn't right for us to join then. My pride and stubborn adherence to the vision blinded me to any other options. It wasn't the right time for either of us. Maybe if it had been, some would be alive now that aren't…including my Mom. And that is something I have to live with for the rest of my life." Poe clapped him on the shoulder.

"She kept speaking of you," he told the former Supreme Leader. "Right to the end, she believed that you could be reached. That her son would come home."

Ben turned away, blinking hard. A sudden surge of grief washed over him, more so because he had almost felt his mother caress him before he woke on Dathomir.

"Story of my life," he murmured. "I did-but too late. Too late to speak with Mom. Too late on Exegol to save Rey, too late to realise that I should have rejected Snoke and gone with Dad when I had to chance…" He swallowed. "Don't waste time. Don't hesitate to say what you mean, to tell the one you love that you do." Poe cocked an eyebrow.

"You proposing to me?" he asked dryly. Ben snorted.

"FN…Finn…" he said, correcting himself. _Kriff! He had travelled across the Galaxy with the former stormtrooper. At least he could do the man the service of getting his name right!_ Poe frowned.

"You been reading my mind?" he asked angrily but Ben shook his head.

"Force aura," he said. "Everyone has one because the Force is everywhere, a living energy that derives from, flows around and permeates all living things. And for Force sensitives, it can reveal very obvious things-like the fact that you are in love with him." He paused. "And he's in love with you." Poe stared. "In case you had any doubts…"

"I am not getting relationship advice from you when I still haven't forgiven you for ripping my mind apart," Poe snapped and rose.

"You're welcome," Ben murmured as the General walked out, clearly with much on his mind. Then he turned back to the stars as he heard soft footsteps approach. "Sorry I woke you," he murmured as Rey walked into the cockpit, a blanket draped over her slender shape.

"I was listening out for you," she admitted. "And when you started talking about Snoke, I could feel your pain." He closed his eyes and sighed as she moved to sit in the co-pilot's chair, drawing her knees up to her chest.

"Sorry," he mumbled. She inspected him, glanced away then glanced back, inspecting his definite features, the expressive eyes, the sensitive lips, the tightness of his jaw and the dip of brows.

"It's been a busy day,' she said without any blame. "And I don't think I properly said thank you for saving me." He looked up then, his eyes shining.

"I think…you saved me more," he admitted. "You saved me from the loneliness that was my life, you listened to me without prejudice…"

"Oh, I had plenty of prejudice," she reminded him. "Monster? Creature in a mask? Murdering snake?"

"You were rather determined to see the worst of me-but then, I only showed you the worst of me," he conceded.

"I saw you in a vision, before I ever met you," she told him. "When I touched the lightsaber." They didn't need to say which lightsaber and he gave a grunt.

"It chose you," he admitted. "It came to your hand when you summoned it, even though I was calling it at the same time."

"I saw you there…hunting me on Starkiller, standing with the Knights in the rain, killing enemies…you were terrible and scary and I hated you for making me feel so helpless…" He gave a sigh.

"You made that clear on Starkiller," he reminded her unconsciously touching a couple of fingers to the place where she had cut his face open. The scar was long gone, healed in Kef Bir when she saved him for the first time, when she killed Kylo Ren for the first time, but occasionally the skin itched with the memory. She chuckled.

"Our timing has always been terrible," she conceded, "and our communication definitely worse." Then reached over and took a sip of his caff. His eyes widened.

"You want me to get…?" he offered, starting to rise but she grasped his arm.

"Sit," she murmured. He sat back down and stared at her, the look in his eyes a mix of wonder and trepidation. She frowned. "What?"

"You're here,' he managed thickly. "I never…I never expected to see you again. I had accepted that my life would be the cost for your life. And I was okay with that, because at least one good thing could come out of the disaster that is my life." She reached up and rested her hand on his cheek feeling him press against the gentle touch.

"I didn't want to be left alone," she told him honestly. "No one knows me like you do."

"No one ever knew me like you," he admitted. "No one ever will." He swallowed. "That was why…on the Supremacy…I asked you to join me. And I was an idiot because I didn't explain why. Not properly. And it was not because you were powerful or of any vision-though I thought so at the time. It wasn't as an Empress because, if I had dared to be honest with myself, that never mattered. And I told myself that because I couldn't allow myself to accept that I had fallen for you, for a scavenger from nowhere when I was supposed to be Kylo Ren, the First Order's enforcer, the Jedi Killer. Especially when Snoke had spent so long teaching me that attachments were a weakness. Yet I meant it when I said you were not 'nothing' to me. Because you are _everything._ And I would have spent my life to make up for my stupidity." He took a deep breath. "Because I love you."

"I think you did spend your life to make up," she said and smiled, her hazel eyes lit with joy. "And I love you too." She leaned up and kissed him, no less passionate than that first kiss but sweeter and longer-lasting. He finally pulled back and gave a yawn. She chuckled. "Am I boring you?" He started to laugh as well.

"I think I'm exhausted," he admitted. She rose and took his hand.

"Good," she murmured. "It didn't feel right sleeping without you." He stiffened, suddenly coy.

"Rey…"

"I promise that I will leave your virtue intact," she teased him. "And I won't heal you against your wishes. That would be a violation, maybe done for the best reasons but it would be against your will…and that's an abuse of our power. And whether to hurt or to heal, it is a violation of consent and bodily integrity. We have to be better than…" _You were. Than Kylo was_. The words hung unsaid but horribly loud in his mind. He nodded.

"I've done too much of that in the past," he acknowledged, rising and curling his hand around hers.

"I've been separated from you for too long," she said quietly. "I just want to feel you there with me, when I go to sleep and when I wake and know that you won't vanish in a blink." He wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm going nowhere," he promised.

-o0o-

The arrival at Coruscant was bittersweet, for Rey and Ben knew that this would be a time of partings. Tamini had been dropped off at Kineva, the Falcon docking only for long enough to drop the Healer off before shooting away and accelerating to hyperspace as soon as possible. Ben and Rey had been trying to work out what they could do next. They had spoken to Chewie and the Wookiee had graciously allowed them to take the Falcon, saying that he wanted to return to Kashyyyk to see his family and try to decide what to do next. He had been Han's friend and partner for over forty years and he really didn't feel he wanted to continue as a smuggler without him. Apart from Lando, all his old friends were gone and though he had made his peace with Ben, he admitted he couldn't see him without relieving that moment when he murdered Han. And though the words hurt Ben, he couldn't argue with the logic but had promised to come if Chewie ever needed him.

Rey had caught Finn and Poe kissing passionately in the passage to the main hold and realised that her friends had finally decided to act on their unspoken feelings that to her had been obvious for a long time. Her heart ached for Rose, who she knew had harboured some feelings for the former stormtrooper but when she approached her, the engineer had just given a smile.

"Love grows where it will," she said softly. "I still love Finn-but it's just going to be as a brother now." She gave a brave smile. "Out there, I will find someone. Or not." She clasped her amulet, the twin of one her sister had always worn. "But I will always have my sister, Rey." And then she hugged the young Jedi, feeling Rey wrap her arms tightly around her. "You are not to vanish from my life, okay? I need to hear from you regularly." Swiping a tear from her face, Rey nodded.

"You will be fed up of me calling you to update you on our daily boring routine," she promised as Rose nodded.

"You're going off with him then?" she asked.

"I have to," Rey sighed. "Ben is my other half, my soul mate. We are the balance and we need to figure out what that means. And Ben can't stay-someone in the Resistance will recognise him and then we'll never be safe. Now, with Kylo Ren officially dead, we have a chance to disappear and try to build something new. Out there, there are other people who are Force Sensitive. And just as I know Finn wants to help rehabilitate stormtroopers who were taken from their families and conditioned, I want to help others like me, who have the Force and who don't understand what it means."

"So you're setting up a new Jedi temple?" Rose guessed but Rey shook her head.

"I don't think other of us want to do that," Rey admitted. "Neither of us want to continue the Jedi or Sith division but promote a way of using the Force that embraces both Darkness and Light."

"Isn't that risky?" Rose asked, inspecting her friend. But Rey's eyes were shining with enthusiasm.

"All of us are a mixture of Dark and Light," she said passionately. "Despite this, we can choose the person we want to be. I wasn't conventionally trained as a Jedi. Ben was-and probably as a Sith as well-and we both agree that neither helped. One emphasised removing emotions and attachments, the other encouraged anger and lack of control. We don't know exactly what we'll do or what we'll call it but we do want to train those who are Force sensitive so they have the same choices as everyone else." Rose nodded, her smile genuine.

"I don't wholly understand-but I will expect to visit when you get it up and running," she said. "And all of this won't last forever…so maybe you may need someone to help?" Rey hugged her again.

"Oh definitely," she smiled as the woman finally released her and followed Jannah and Beau off _the Falcon_. Zorii had already gone to try to get a lift back to Donolos to collect her ship and only Poe and Finn were left. Ben had hung back carefully out of sight from the ramp, in case he was recognised and Rey walked to her friends. Finn immediately hugged her.

"You take care, okay?" he told her in a whisper. "You're like a sister and if you need anything…if he does anything…I'm there! Promise." Rey chuckled.

"You will have more things on your mind than me, what with being a General and co-head of the Resistance and having a new relationship…" she teased him. Despite his dark skin, he visibly blushed.

"I-I never thought…I mean I…" he managed as she pushed him back towards his boyfriend.

"Real smooth," she teased him as he looked to Poe for support.

"For the record, I think she can defend herself," he said, walking forward and gave Rey a warm hug. "You need anything and you call, okay? Finn and I will drop everything if you need us." Then he turned. "For the record, I still don't like you," he said to the taller man.

"Granted," Ben said quietly.

"But I respect you," Poe continued to Rey's surprise. "And you have done everything you promised to. You brought down _the Eliminator_ when it could have blasted us apart. Are you sure you don't want to stay for General Hugs' trial?" Ben gave a small smirk.

"Amusing though it would be, too risky," he conceded. "You have all the proof you need to convict him and there is a real chance he or one of the other witnesses would recognise Kylo Ren. It's better I vanish." Poe granted him a nod and a wink before he grinned one last time at Rey and walked down the ramp. "Coming, BB-8?"

But there was a pause and then the little droid gave a small sheepish beep, followed by a few little noises that sounded incredibly sad. Poe turned and looked back to the droid.

"It's okay, buddy," he said and then he looked up at Rey and there was a brief flash of sorrow in his dark eyes. "Take care of my droid," he said. "I expect visits." And then he was gone. Finn gave her a last hug and followed, again nodding an acknowledgement to Rey. Finally, she hit the control and the ramp raised. Ben visibly relaxed.

"You sure you don't want to pick up supplies?" he asked her but she shook her head.

"Maybe later," she murmured, her voice, subdued. "In the meantime, I just want to leave…" He caught her arms and looked into her face.

"You can stay," he told her gently. "Rey, you don't have to separate yourself from your new family just because I am here." Looking into his face, she wondered how the murderous monster Kylo Ren had become this sweet, compassionate man and then she kissed him.

"I think…I want to actually spend some time with you. Together. In the same place, not halfway across the Galaxy. We both need to heal and rest and then, I can visit my friends again, once I figure out what I'm doing, what I need to be as 'the last Jedi'." He nodded.

"We'll figure it out together," he promised as she pulled away…then gave him a small shove and sprinted for the cockpit.

"Last one there doesn't fly!" she yelled and vanished round the corner.

"Oh it is so on," he growled and raced after her.

-o0o-

They approached from the nightside, coming in over the western desert as the pinkish light of predawn was warming the isolated, abandoned moisture farm. The domed above ground portion of the building was half-buried in drifted sands and the place looked long abandoned. The Falcon landed neatly a short way away and they walked forward. Rey remained in her standard outfit, though Ben had found a white shirt and clean pants in the Falcon that had almost certainly belonged to his father. It had astonished Rey that they hadn't been stripped by the scavengers on Jakku until she recalled that the ship had been in the possession of Unkar Plutt: no one would have tried to steal from him without possibly forfeiting their ability to trade and eat at all.

Slowly, Ben had approached the moisture farm, knowing the history. This had been the home of Owen and Beru, the couple who had raised Luke until the day he had met the droids C-3P0 and R2-D2 and had been drawn into the Rebellion against the Empire. Darth Vader's troops, seeking the droids, had found the farm and slaughtered the couple when seeking the droids, who were already with Luke and Obi-Wan Kenobi. As he looked, he could see the simple markers of the graves of couple, buried amid the sands and forgotten in all stories-except by the family of Luke Skywalker.

Rey took his hand, sensing his mood and he offered a wan smile that never touched his eyes. The couple had taken in baby Luke after the death of his mother, Padme, in childbirth and had raised him as their nephew on Tatooine though his eyes had always been on the skies. His twin Leia had been given to Bail and Breha Organa on Alderaan, raised as a Princess and a Rebel. There was no grave for her parents, blasted to atoms with the rest of the planet Alderaan by the Death Star as the woman had watched. It seemed that no one associated with the Skywalkers made it out alive…except him.

He released her hand as she moved forward, her scavenger's instincts prompting her to explore the place in case there was something here that hadn't been picked clean over the intervening thirty five years. It was an education to see her search, her eyes flicking expertly over anything that could be of value before finding a discarded rusting sheet of metal and sand-sledding into the main sunken courtyard of the home. The look of sheer innocent delight on her face had warmed his heart as he thrust his morbid thoughts aside, skidding unsteadily down the sandy slope to join her.

They had explored the rooms and he had been struck by the amount of space available-not so much in the bedrooms but in the central living area, the storage areas and the garage. Luke's home still carried faint echoes of his presence and he closed his eyes and felt for them in the little eddies in the Force, feeling echoes of happier times, of the Uncle he had idolised when he was a small child.

They had rolled up the two lightsabers-Luke and Leia's-in a piece of cloth they had found in the home, binding the sabers together as the twins had been. Finally, in the dawn light by the homestead, they had knelt, hands clasped, and buried them deep in the ground using the Force. And then they had stood, staring at the sunrise and feeling the warmth of the twin suns of their faces.

That was the moment, surrounded by calm and serenity, that they felt it, the wash of warmth and pride. In a second, they had turned to see the faint Force ghosts of Luke and Leia, standing by the homestead dressed in white Jedi-style robes and smiling. There were no words, only the approval of their actions that both the watchers secretly craved. Ben's hand enclosed Rey's and he closed his eyes as the warmth of the suns hit his skin. She nodded once to them and sent a silent goodbye.

 _I'll be there for him,_ she promised as they vanished into the brightening day. Then she looked up to see tears streaking his face and as she blinked, she realised that her own face was wet. Quietly, she rested her head against his shoulder.

"Thank you," he said roughly. "She's finally gone, isn't she?"

"I think so," she said softly. "Do you want to stay longer?" He turned his head to look at her, knowing there was nothing here for him.

"Do you?" he asked her gently, giving her the choice. She pulled a face.

"Kriff-I've had my fill of desert planets to last a dozen lifetimes," she told him with feeling. "I want to go somewhere green, somewhere blue, somewhere filled with life and absolutely no sand…"

"Not even a beach?" he asked her teasingly. She frowned.

"What's a beach?" she asked him as he supplied a memory from his childhood, of Leia and Han and a very young Ben, playing by the sea on Chandrila under a cloudless sky. Her lips lifted in a smile of wonder. "I would very much like to see one," she said eagerly and he gave in to the temptation to kiss her once more.

"Okay," he said indulgently. "I literally have nothing on my schedule…ever…except being with you. So a beach it is…" She sighed, pragmatism prodding her conscience.

"We'll go find Kyber crystals first," she said practically, "so we can make new lightsabers. So we aren't defenceless if we go to a beach…or anywhere else."

"And _then_ a beach," he said.

"Maybe more than one," she agreed. "And then we can decide what we want to do." He nodded, his hand closing around hers and fingers twining together.

"Whatever we do-training young Force Users, helping the New Republic keep the peace or just living our lives to atone for the evil I have done-then I am certain that it will be perfect. Because I have you. I'm no longer alone-and nor are you." She smiled at the sincerity in his words as they turned back to the Millennium Falcon.

"What are you going to call yourself now?" she asked as they reached the ship. He sighed as they closed the ramp and headed to the cockpit to prepare for takeoff.

"Good question," he admitted. "I guess…Ben."

"Ben what?" she pushed him, laughing at his dilemma. The bounties had taken away all the names he could legitimately claim and though he was officially dead, they couldn't risk using one in case someone put two and two together. So in fact, he was almost in the same situation as she was. The Force still enjoyed toying with them, it seemed.

"I can't use Solo or Organa…" he reminded her, taking the pilot's seat.

"What about Skywalker?" she suggested and his eyes widened.

"As in Luke?" he asked, the irritation still leaking into his voice. No matter that he had made his peace, there was still a tiny corner of him that hung onto the resentment of that night. Then he closed his eyes and forced himself to be calm, breathing deeply. "Sorry." He felt her forgiveness and reassurance flood down the Bond.

"Maybe...as in _Anakin_?" she suggested, seeing the creases in his brow settle a little at her words. He nodded.

"I-I could consider that," he conceded. "But why does it matter?" Eyes drifting to her as she flipped the switches in the co-pilot's seat, he noted a small smile lifting her lips. She glanced up, feeling his intense inspection.

"Well, I can't use my own name so I was just wondering what name I could use when we married," she teased him lightly. "And it would be fitting, after all, since all three of them, in one way or another, were my mentors or teachers."

BB-8 beeped a query.

"Yes, I think she just did," Ben murmured. "You did, didn't you?" She chuckled.

"Maybe that is something for the beach," she laughed as he slammed the lever forward and _the Millennium Falcon_ soared up into the brilliant, cloudless sky. "We have all the time we need, a lifetime to work it out…together."

**The End.**

**A/N: So here it is-my reimagining of the end of TROS. The Happy Ending we all wanted (by a slightly circuitous route). Hope you enjoyed the story. BW-hp**

**A/N 2: Ouroboros is an ancient symbol depicting a serpent eating its own tail, symbolising a cycle of life, death and rebirth.**


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